My beautiful dear wife. Joann ,,its, december 25th .merry christmas. i love you very much. every day is so hard to deal with without you. theres n empptynesss in my being n soul. you were my partner my everytthing. i dont like being here without you by myside. i am dyinng insside n i dont have the will to to keep going. this is the hardest thing i ever dealt with. i just miss. u so sso much. u r always in my thoughts n in my heart . i wish i could talk to u n hear ur voice. n know that ur ok. ive been seeing the pastor miss litttle the one wwho married us n it just. i have blankness in my mind . My body is here but everything else is gone honey. sadnness is taking its toll n i am. well u know what im saying n feeling. i love you n i miss you with all my heart. ur cat spooky. is ok i found him a new home.