• Mitchell Funeral Home at Raleigh Memorial Park
    Raleigh, NC
In partnership with the Dignity Memorial® network
Jay Finnigan Sr. 1952 - 2013
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May 08, 2014
When Eileen and Jay started dating I was just a kid but I remember it well. It wasn't love at first sight but it was indeed shortly after. I never saw Eileen as happy as when she was waiting for him to come over to pick her up for a date. They were meant for each other and they built a wonderful family. Thankfully Katie and Jay inherited his sense of humor. I know he would want us to concentrate on the happy things and the good times and there were so many.
May 08, 2014
The first time I met Jay was in Texas, and from the moment I met him, I knew what a special person he was. He always made you feel welcomed and knew just how to make you laugh. I will always cherish the times I got to spend with Jay and the stories he shared. When he spoke of his family, you could tell how much he loved them. His love for them was immeasurable..
May 08, 2014
Jay was such a big asset to the Sweeney family.His dry humor was priceless. And his unconditional love for Eileen and his family was golden. A gentle giant is the perfect description of this wonderful man. He is sorely missed and will be forever.
Jack and Denise Sweeney
May 08, 2014
I have many fond memories of Uncle Jay. Over the years, I spent time in the summer with the Finnigans both in Freehold and in Raleigh. Uncle Jay was always welcoming and willing to listen to the tales of whatever adventures Katie and I had during the day. I will always remember the vacation I spent with Uncle Jay, Aunt Eileen and Katie in Florida. I still smile when I think about how we were "the Griswolds" at every restaurant!

When I think of Uncle Jay I remember his great sense of humor, kindness and generosity.
May 08, 2014
Jay was a true gentleman who I always looked up to (literally and figureatively). He had a quick wit and always found humour in situations especially the situation when Jimmy S. shot off the Fireworks in Shark River Hills (I think Eileen will remember that). I enjoyed the many times we golfed with other family members and the patience he showed while he was on the green and a couple of us were still in the woods looking for our lost balls. When we moved into our house many years ago we had a lot of work to do. He visted one time and volunteered to build us shelves in our bathroom closet just because he wanted to help us. He did other things to help us but that one stands out in my mind. Jay was always a gracious and generous host whenever we visted in North Jersey, Dallas or Raleigh. He took an interest in my job and always asked how things were going workwise. I miss him and was very fortunate to have had him as a brother-in-law.
May 08, 2014
It's difficult for me to remember a time when I didn't know Jay. At family gatherings you could always count on him to lighten a moment,make you laugh or just smile. Jay loved his family, that was clear in every aspect of his life. And it was a mutual admiration society.
The memories of Jay are treasures that will be carried with us always. It's comforting to know that we were part of a well-lived life.
May 08, 2014
I was 12 when I was first introduced to the Finnigan's. They had moved to Texas and our families spent a lot of time together. Although our families were friends, I didn't know Dad well when I was younger. It wasn't until I married into the family that my relationship with Dad grew. Dad always treated me like his daughter, like I naturally belonged in his family. He was kind, gentle, loving and thoughtful. He was always willing to answer any questions I had about computers, stocks or running. And he never made me feel inferior for my lack of knowledge in these areas.

When our oldest child was born, he
melted into mush and turned into a giant teddy bear. He was always a proud "Big Jay". As our children grew, he was always interested in their lives and enjoyed catching up with them, hearing about their days and spending time with them.

I miss not having Dad around...I miss his gentle soul, his kind word, his peaceful heart. I love you Dad!
May 08, 2014
Uncle Jay was truly one of the kindest people I have ever met. Never would you see him where he did not greet you with a warm smile. His sense of humor was contagious and I will always remember the many times he made me laugh.
May 08, 2014
I was very young when my sister started dating Jay. He quickly became an older brother to me. I would spend a week every summer with Jay and Eileen and I was always treated like a King. I will never forget him taking me to the dealership to pick up and ride home in his brand new Datsun 280ZX. As a young kid just getting into the car stage of life this was a special event. Later in life he guided me through some career choices. All the mentoring, kindness, and generosity pale in comparison to his sense of humor. He had an uncanny ability to make people laugh. The first funeral I ever attended I laughed more than I cried cause Jay had a way of taking a bad situation and making it less uncomfortable. A wit so quick it would amaze. Thinking back now in the 40 +years I've known Jay I cannot recall one time where he lost his cool or raised his voice in anger. Even after I broke his driver on his brand new expensive golf clubs he was a calm as could be. A true gentle giant.
April 29, 2014
Soft spoken and always so gentle! Jay was someone I literally looked up to! He had the best sense of humor and made me laugh. His smile was contagious and made you feel warm and welcome. My youngest , Kelly, was very lucky because she and Jay had such a special relationship! She loved him dearly for being there for her when she needed him. I thank God for allowing me to get to know this special man and his wonderful family! You will never be forgotten!
April 15, 2014
Best friends are a rarity as most of us can count them on one hand. Jay and I worked together for many years with Interdata, Perkin-Elmer and then Concurrent Computer Corp. After our stints with them we separated for many years. During those years we played golf, shared stories and laughs. After the past year I realize that Jay was a rare and valued friend...best friend to whom I never said the words. His legacy lives on with a dear family he cherished.
I miss the Friday call asking if I wanted to play golf the coming weekend.
April 14, 2014
As a car-crazed teenager, watching Jay meticulously go through the restoration of his Triumph sports car from across the street was torturous. But once I had “my first ride”, I soon found out that Jay certainly had the upper hand not only in skill, but also in tools. When I attempted an automotive project, Jay often came to the rescue selflessly with the exact tool needed to finish the job. To this day I still strive, and fail miserably, at replicating the garage organization techniques Jay had perfected.
April 12, 2014
Anita and I knew Jay for only about 15 years though it seems like we have always known him. A great neighbor, he was always there if we needed him. A quiet and thoughtful man, Jay always displayed a sincere interest in other's lives and wellbeing. And, we could see that his strong love for his family dominated his personna. We will miss barbeques on the patio, long discussions about our mutual career path choices, and help with borrowing a the right tool (that Jay always had and we never had). And, mostly I will miss those last minute rounds of golf where the ever-patient Jay would shoot a 78 as I struggled to a 98. Cool, green early mornings (Jay always teed off early), damp with dew, marveling at Jay's calm excellence. I often wondered what Jay really thought about my game. What he always said was "Head down, slow your back swing...OK not too bad." We will truly miss our friend and we know he is in God's loving hands.
April 11, 2014
It's been a year since Jay left us and I still have many thoughts and memories of him. Jay was a role a model (and still is) for those that want to be a man of great character and principles. We all miss his smile, laugh, special humor and kind words. I still admire Jay through my good memories of him. I miss him.
April 11, 2014
Jay was a Son, Grandson, Husband, Father, Grandfather, Brother, Cousin, Son In-Law, Brother In-Law, Friend, Co-worker, Neighbor, Advisor and Mentor. Jay was many things to all of us and he fulfilled each role with the greatest ease, with passion and with love! I'm sure I've missed many other roles that he was to us, but I do know that his biggest role now is an Angel…. Our Angel!
I miss Jay's friendship, his humor and the great love that he had for his family! The pride and love that he had for his wife, children, and his grandchildren was awesome to witness! You could easily see that they were the light of Big Jay's life!
He truly was a “Gentle Giant” and I miss him very much!
April 10, 2014
It's hard to believe it's been a whole year since Jay's been gone! I miss his sense of humor….. his easy way of finding the ‘light' side of things and making us all crack up laughing. He was an amazing friend…. He even stepped up into an uncomfortable spot to help us out when we needed him a couple of years ago. I will never forget that!
I loved the way he and Doug would enjoy each other's company and go to car shows together, go out for breakfast… and Jay would probably have been the first to tease me that it was a ‘guy's day out'!!!
I loved all his car shopping stories, kids stories, stories about him and my Dad, …he could always make us laugh... I loved his integrity…. loved our dinners with you and him, Eileen! And especially loved how I knew he'd be there if I ever really needed him.
You are sincerely missed Jay Finnigan!! You were THE best of cousins! I love you! .... and I sure hope that you and my Mom, along with all the others, are certainly enjoying some chocolate ice cream up there together! :-)
April 09, 2014
A whole year has already passed since the loss of one of the very best of the Finnigans. He left us so early and for that we are so sad. I am so proud that we shared the same grandparents. We come from great stock. They are very honorable men and take great pride in their families and the way they conducted their lives. My heart goes out to you Eileen and your children and grandchildren. Just try to remember how blessed you are and not how sad we all are. One day we will all be together again and what a feast that will be. My love to each of you and God bless everyone.
December 12, 2013
Dear Eileen,
Don and I are in a state of shock to hear of Jay's passing. There are no words to say how saddened we are. I will always remember and treasure our times together at your home in Neptune. You and the family are in my prayers.
Love, Karin
June 02, 2013
My dearest Jay, 41 years tomorrow brings back an ocean of wonderful memories and so many special times together. I am so lucky to have you as the love of my life. Blessed for the many gifts of life you gave us all. For the sense of humor you passed on to our children and grandchildren. I know you will be with me and that you are watching over all of us. I miss you every minute of every day. I love you always and forever, until we meet again.
May 21, 2013
Mrs Finnigan,

I heard about the sudden passing away of Jay. Please accept my deepest condolences and sympathy and we pray that may God grant you and the family the fortitude to bear this irreparable loss.

God Bless,

Zul and Nasim Abbany, North Carolina
May 09, 2013
I was very sorry to learn of Jay's passing. We worked together for a brief time at Bell & Howell where Jay was always supportive and helpful of our efforts north of the border (B&H Canada). I will never forget the sparkle in his eyes as he showed me around his little red sportscar! He was so very proud of that! I will remember him through those good times!!
May 04, 2013
Eileen, JJ & Katie..... once again, thank you for sharing this video.... I hate to see it not be available soon, so I had to watch it again..... my heart is heavy.... I find it so hard to believe it's almost a month and in some ways, it seems like that was forever ago and yet, I still can't believe he's not with us. I miss him so much.... I ache with you..... You will always be in my heart, my cousin and my friend Jay.....
April 22, 2013
I am sorry for your loss. Jay was a great co-worker and will be missed here at Vidant Health.
April 19, 2013
A wondful man will be missed by a wonderful woman. May God give you peace and comfort and loving hope for the future.
April 16, 2013
Mrs. Finnigan, Jay, and Katie, I was so sorry to hear of Mr. Finnigan's passing. Your family has always been such good friends to us and I know that we always enjoyed spending time with you all. I know we will miss Mr. Finnigan, but we will never forget our fond memories.
April 12, 2013
Hi All, words don't begin to express the loss. We didn't get to see you all as much as we would like. But never forgot about you. As far as we are from you it still hurts as if we saw you every day. Jay will be missed very much . We wish you all the very best and will keep you in our prayers. The photo gallery, WOW. Wish we could be with you. Love you all

The O'Fria's Joe,Gerry, Joseph and Jason
April 12, 2013
I am so sorry for passing of your dad. I am very proud to have meet your dad. I understand why you are such a great person. Please tell your mom I am so sorry and my prayers are with the Finnigan family.
April 12, 2013
I was so sad to hear of Jay's passing. Myself, along with many others have wonderful memories of working with Jay at Concurrent Computer Corp. in NJ. To Jay's family, I share your sadness today and extend my deepest condolences. He was and always will be a wonderful man.
April 11, 2013
Dear Eileen and family,
I was very saddened by Jay's passing. I grew up with Jay in Cedar Brook, NJ. He was on my little league team that my Dad coached. I also knew Jay throughout High School. He was a member of our graduating class of 1970. From myself and all the other "class of '70 graduates" from Edgewood High School our thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. George Nelson and the class of 1970 Edgewood High School Atco, NJ
April 11, 2013
To the Finnigan Family - very sorry for your loss. Very nice man, was a pleasure to work with him at Vidant. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
April 11, 2013
Eileen and Katie, I am so sorry for your loss. I only met Jay a few times but I always knew I could find Katie at any race because I could spot Jay's head above the crowd. I think that is how I will always remember him, head and shoulders above the crowd. Kisses and hugs to you both.
April 10, 2013
Eileen, my dear friend, our hearts are broken to hear the news about Big Jay's passing. Every memory we have of Jay brings a smile to our faces. We never play mini golf without thinking about Jay. He was among the finest people we have ever known. God bless all of you at this very sad time. We love you.
April 10, 2013
Eileen, I was so sadden to hear about Jay's passing....He was one of my favorite patients at Dr Wainright and Wassel. My heart aches for you and your children. You all are in my thoughts and prayers.
April 10, 2013
Dear Eileen and Finnigan family:

I am very sad to learn of Jay's passing. Jay hired me as his Assistant at Bell + Howell in January, 2000. I remember the interview like it was yesterday…it lasted about 2 hours because we got to talking about New Jersey and our families. I enjoyed working with Jay and will remember him as a kind and thoughtful person. My heart and thoughts are with you.
April 10, 2013
Finnigan Family,

I am so sorry for your loss. I have worked with Jay for the past 2 years at Vidant Health. Jay really loved his work and he strove to make Vidant Health a better place during the time that he was here.

My fondest memory of Jay will be seeing him come up behind me in his little white Chevy on 264 headed to Greenville. As he would pass me, he would look over, smile and raise his coffee cup.

May you find comfort in all the memories you have of him. May our loving, Heavenly Father also comfort your hearts at this time. God bless you all.
April 10, 2013
Eileen, JJ and Katie – Our hearts ache for you. Hold tight to your memories, as they will give you tranquility and a smile. Find peace in the reality of the pure unconditional love that Jay had for each of you. We are blessed to have been able to share our lives with him! Heaven has another angel to watch over us! God bless!
April 10, 2013
Eileen, family and friends of Jay, there are no words to express how sorry I am for your loss. Please know that we're thinking of you and wishing you peace.
~ Bob & Deirdre
April 10, 2013
All of us that worked with Jay at Concurrent Computers have wonderful memories of working with Jay in the many roles that he held. He was a mentor, a coach, a partner and a friend. It goes without saying how much he will be missed by everyone. I'm especially appreciative of the time he spent with me sharing his experiences. Jay, there is a cavity in the world where you once stood.

Tony Pluchino
April 10, 2013
Eileen, though we never met I wanted you to know how sorry I am to hear of Jay's passing. We worked togehter when I was a Bell & Howell. We both shared the love of the game of golf and played many rounds together. When I left the Raleigh area I still could count on Jay to give me great business advice. You and your family will be in our prayers.
April 10, 2013
To the Finnigan family:
I remember Jay most for his smile and laugh. He was a great guy and friend at Edgewood Regional High School.
April 09, 2013
Eileen, Jay & Katie and families,
There are no words to describe the shock and sadness that fills our hearts over the loss of Jay, a close cousin and very special friend. The thought of his bright eyes, beautiful smile and his unbelievable sense of humor warms my heart with a lifetime of beautiful memories and blessings for having known and loved him and for having shared of piece of his life…. But also breaks our hearts over his passing… at much too young an age.

Though our hearts are broken at this time of loss, we celebrate a life well lived. We will cherish the memories of times spent with him forever. May the love of friends and family, along with your faith, help carry you through your grief. Eileen – we will be here to help you whenever you need us. We love you and our hearts ache for you...
April 09, 2013
Eileen, our hearts go out to you and your family. You are in our prayers.
April 09, 2013
To the Finnigan Family, I am so sorry for your loss. Jay was a wonderful colleague. We enjoyed sharing golf and grandchildren stories. He will be sorely missed at Vidant. His smile and council were always welcoming. I've had you all in my prayers for comfort during this trying time.
April 09, 2013
Eileen, I am so saddened by Jay's passing - you have been in my prayers and thoughts - my heart is very heavy for you and your family. Much love and hugs, Brenda Foldesi
April 09, 2013
Hey Big Guy.

Words cannot describe how our hearts broke when we heard the news. I will never understand why the good die young, but I am confident you are looking over us all. Thank you so much for being so amazing to the whole Cavallo Clan. Your big hug and constant smile were something we could always depend on -- whether in the parking lot in Buies Creek or at your unforgettable Superbowl parties. You will forever hold a special place in our hearts, until we meet again....Rest in peace.

Nick, Kristen, AJ & Blake Cavallo
April 09, 2013
My deepest condolences on the loss of your husband, father and good friend. I used to work for Jay at Concurrent Computer Corporation and remember fondly my memories of that association. He will be missed.
April 09, 2013
My husband, Pat Donahue, and I were extremely saddened to hear of Jay's untimely death. We remember him fondly from our days working with him at Bell & Howell. Our thoughts are with you in the inexpressibly difficult time. Warmly, Sue Austin
April 09, 2013
May his soul rest in peace he was great volunteer for the jimmy v
April 09, 2013
Eileen and loved ones, My heart goes out to each and every one of you in providing comfort to get through this tragic time. Jay always wore such a glowing smile and eyes that sparkled with love when he shared stories of his wife & family. What a beautiful love story indeed. He will be missed. May all the fond memories you shared, warm your hearts indifinetly as God has acquired one more Angel.
April 09, 2013
Eileen and family- on behalf of the Jimmy V Celebrity Golf Classic, we offer our most sincere condolences for your loss. Big J will be missed on the course this year. You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.
April 09, 2013
To our dearest friend Eileen and Family. Shock and sadness do not describe the way we felt when learning of Jay's passing. What a kind and gentle man. We are your friends and you know what friends are for . . .giving support in times of shock and sadness. We are here to console and do the heavy lifting if necessry. I suspect Jay is on the front on Heaven's finest course!
April 09, 2013
Eileen, My heart is full of love for you, and sadness at the loss of Jay... I'm here for you with anything that I can do to help in your loss. J!LL FL!NK
April 09, 2013
Eileen, Dianne and I are so sorry and pass along our condolences to you and family. Big Jay inspired me to be a better PM and my Dianne so enjoyed her short chats with Jay in parking lot when he would stop by while she was waiting for me to go home together. Jay will be greatly missed. May God bless you and your family in this time of sorrow.
April 09, 2013
I am so sorry for your loss. He was kind, approachable, friendly, and humble manager. He cared for his colleagues, his team and Vidant Health. He hired me and I joined because he was my manager. In the last 8 weeks, he left a remarkable impression on me.

Ananthan Ramasamy
Enterprise Solution Group
Vidant Medical Center
Greenville, NC
April 09, 2013
Linda and I are shocked and saddened by the news of Jay's passing. Please accept our condolences. We will be unable to attend the services but know that our prayers go out to your whole family.

I have wonderful memories of working with Jay. I remember him as a person I could count on when times got tough. He will be thought of fondly by me and also missed by me.

with great respect, Pierre
April 09, 2013
Oh Eileen I am so sad for you and your family. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Love Margie
April 08, 2013
Allen & I are so sorry for your loss. He was truly a great husband, father and grandfather. We can not be there but know that our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. May your memories of your years together and his love of family comfort you all. Love Allen & Barbara
April 08, 2013
You were the best role model a son, father, and professional could ever have. You taught me so much, about parenthood, business, and life - you lead by example. I will miss you every day - but I am so thankful for the time we had together, and more importantly the time you shared with Shannon, Reese, and Drew. We all loved you very much.

My most favorite memories of our time were when you and I were on the golf course together - especially when it was just the two of us, or you, me and Landon, playing alone - early in the morning with no one else around. It was just us - goofing off, sharing stories, and joking. Those are my memories I will hold near and dear, and relive by telling my kids about the fun we had.
I never said thank you enough – I regret that, and I'm sorry. I promise to continue to live my life by the standard you set, and hope I become half the father you are to Kate and I. Rest in peace, and I will see you again in the “clubhouse”.

Love Jay Jr.
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