Dear Dr. Meadow,
You have inspired, seen and mentored me even in our brief and meaningful encounter. I shall continue the vision ...
Do not go where the path may lead..
Go instead where there is no path
and leave a trail..
That was Dr.Meadow and her life.
And... she sure knew how to push my buttons !
She leaves a remarkable legacy.
Her charisma was a combination of clinical insight and wit. Dr Meadow moved with grace in a field where most people cannot help but appear guarded. She touched my mind with her mind, leaving a permanent trace there and—perhaps more significantly—she touched my heart as well. I find solace in the thought that remembrance is a small triumph of life over death and oblivion...
When I met Dr. Meadow in 1989 while I was applying for admission to BGSP, she told me that I don’t have to be smart to get in to the program just to get out. She immediately put me at ease and at the same time she impressed me. Dr. Meadow was an amazing woman: she was a lover of life, brilliant, bold and determined. She was a major inspiration both personally and professionally and she made a powerful impact on my life.
Dr. Meadow shared her love for Ireland and the Irish stories with me. When she and her husband visited my friends back home in Ireland they all had a grand time! Another time she called me from Dublin on her cell phone as she was driving on busy streets -- I heard her yell out to the officer “how do I get to the other side of the river?” These were special connections for me.
I witnessed Dr. Meadow’s enthusiasm, hard work and passion as she founded the doctorial program in Vermont named for her late husband Cyril Z. Meadow. I saw CZMI quickly proceed from the development stage, get accredited to become a flourishing institute due to her love and dedication for psychoanalysis.
And I cherish two recent occasions with Dr. Meadow: One was last May at the Seattle conference where she was the featured speaker and I saw how the audience immediately responded to her ability to work emotionally with the group -- it was both a wonderful professional and intimate experience. And at graduation last June I received the greatest personal gift from Dr. Meadow when she jumped up on stage to join her daughter Dr. Reed in personally giving me my certificate – in the midst of other concerns Dr. Meadow had remembered that I asked her a month earlier if she’d present my certificate.
Dr. Meadow, I greatly miss seeing you but you will never die in my heart because you will always be with me. I will continue to work at CZMI to carry on the legacy you started in your husband’s name. Thank you!
Dr. Meadow was the modern analyst who most effectively reached out to the other psychoanalytic disciplines, and for that I cherish her.
I have never in my life seen so many incredible inspiring words of my close friend’s late grandmother Dr. Phyllis Meadow. Dr. Meadow was truly a remarkable, intelligent, inspiring woman to so many people and I feel honored to know that my best college friend, Dr. Meadow’s very own granddaughter Amanda Reed, is a living kin to her. I wish in so many ways that I could have met Amanda long ago so that I would have had the opportunity to meet Dr. Meadow. It just so happens that I have a profound interest in psychology for my present undergraduate studies and would have loved to continue my graduate studies under Dr. Meadow’s instruction. I didn’t realize the extent to what she had done until her recent passing; though saddened, I am positively delighted to hear of her impact in so many lives! I would be honored to see the schools she has established and taught at, if only to understand the tremendous legacy she has left behind her. She was truly amazing! I know first-hand that Dr. Meadow has inspired her granddaughter and now me indirectly through hearing about her accomplishments. She will undoubtedly be missed by many-including those, like I, who can only hope to know about her.
I first encountered the community of CMPS, BGSP, and CZMI at the summer, 2004, conference, entitled, "Liberating Desire." Dr. Meadow was expected to have been there and it remained unclear as the week went on, whether she would be able to be there or not, due to health concerns. As it turned out, she was not able to be there, and the void that was created by her absence spoke volumes. I longed for the experience of meeting and being able to get to know this extraordinary woman. I did meet her. It was at the December 11 conference. I went to that conference primarily because I wanted to see her, and I am glad I did. But I did not have an opportunity to get to know her, to experience the wonderful gifts of which those who have known her speak so eloquently. I believe I will feel the loss of what could not be for me, for years to come.
I only knew Dr. Meadow for a short time but in that time she had a powerful impact. Her energy and lust for life, her vivaciousness and strength were inspiring. Her thoughts and comments were life-changing and I'm sorry I won't have a chance to hear more, although her work will live on and reverbate in those she touched and those they impact.
Our community has lost a leader, whose intelligence, talent, perserverance,and wisdom has been an inspiration to many.
She will be sorely missed and remain in our hearts forever.
For the past 25 years, Phyllis Meadow has been the single most influential person in my professional and personal development. She always knew what feeling I needed from her, and she gave it. Like when she braved a snowstorm to attend a group session, saying “Nothing could keep me from group this week. Eva is furious with me!” And when she came out to Seattle because I needed her to bless it for me. And when she allowed me to hang out with her the Sunday afternoon after her last conference, to say goodbye. I have been immeasurably enriched by her, and I will miss her terribly.
To my dear friend and colleague Phyllis Meadow. With your passing, an era passes. But the memories wll not!
As a student at CMPS for 10 years I met Dr. Meadow many times. She was filled with more life than anyone I ever met. There is a huge empty space in the world without her.
In 1968, three years after I began working with Dr. Meadow as my analyst, I was a struggling artist and writer. I told her that I had been given a children's book to illustrate from Atheneum about a cat named Horatio and I didn't want to do it. "Never turn anything down," she said. And that is how I became the author/illustrator of over 200 books for young readers, a graduate of the Center for Modern Psychanalytic Studies, Vice President at NAAP (which Dr. Meadow founded), established a private practive and many other fulfilling things in my life because I didn't turn them down. Though my treatment with Dr. Meadow ended when I graduated from the Center in 1991, I often saw her at CMPS functions and kept in touch with her that way. The last time I saw her was at the CMPS conference last month. When there was a moment when she was alone before she went up on the stage, I rushed over to see her. After a private exchange, I said "You promised me years ago when I first started working with you that you and I were going to grow very old together." She answered, "I don't have any control over that any more." With that we said goodbye. Well, there is more: Recently in a Toyko antique shop a Japanese publish discovered that first book called "Horatio" and republished it. It is a story about a woman, named Mrs. Casey, and how she kept bringing in sick and lost animals to care for, much to the dismay of her pet cat, Horatio, who runs away from home and then returns with two orphan kittens for Mrs. Casey to care for. Dr. Meadow and her home on 13th Street were the inspiration for the illustrations for the book, as she was for many of my other books over the years that I wrote and illustrated. Thus, Dr. Meadow, as Mrs. Casey, is now delighting millions of children in Japan with her inspiration and her presence, in case you are wondering what she is doing now.
My last encounter with Dr.Meadow was right after the CMPS Annual Conference on December 11th, 2004. While on my way out, Dr. Meadow and I crosssed paths. I asked if I could give her a kiss and a hug and of course she obliged. Then in her signature style, she asked, "have you graduated yet?!" And with the same fervor, I replied, "no, but I will, I will!" Dr. Meadow, I can still hear the sound of your voice in my head. I thank you with great tenderness for sharing this poignant moment at a time in your life when so many other things were so much more important. I express these thoughts and feelings with immeasurable respect and tenderness.
I took my first class over 25 years ago at CMPS. Phyllis Meadow was my teacher and I rcognized she was star. I wrote to her at the time, I will follow you forever. Forever was too short but I have her written words to keep inspiring me. My head and heart will however always miss her.
My life changed when Dr. Meadow came into my life as a child. Now I am a woman with children of my own, and I feel changed with her gone.
I will always be grateful to Dr Meadow for the excellent training that she gave me. She was a brilliant and exceptionally dedicated psychoanalyst and educator who made unparalleled contributions to our field.
She should have died hereafter.
There would have been a time for such a word.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day.
To the last syllable of recorded time.
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death.
Out, out, brief candle.
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player.
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
and then is heard no more.
It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
(For Dr. Meadow from Shakespeare's Macbeth. Macbeth says this upon the death of his wife.)
Phyllis Meadow was the driving force behind the creation of the first institute that made becoming a modern psychoanalyst available to everybody. I don't like to imagine what my life would have been without attending and graduating from CMPS. It was exactly what I needed. I'm sure this was the case for many, many others.
Before I ever met Dr. Meadow I had an image of her. Someone I trust, who knew her well, expressed the idea that she had more life drive than anyone he had any met. I felt some trepidation on meeting this dauntingly energetic person. I consider myself extremely lucky to have sat in a classroom with her, heard her present at conferences, and danced on her lawn in Vermont. I felt energized in her presence and inspired by her determination and sharp vision. I will miss her and yearn for her. But if memory makes one immortal than she will be with me.
Phyllis Meadow showed us what passion and intellect can accomplish. She built institutes and buildings. She inspired countless individuals to stretch beyond the limits of their imaginations. Through her leadership, students in New York State can finally earn Masters’ Degrees in psychoanalysis at the Center for Modern Psychoanalysis. Through her writings, therapists can learn the art of working psychoanalytically with the most challenging patients. As a supervisor and teacher, Dr. Meadow helped me discover the power that lies in the knowledge and acceptance of one’s true desire. I miss you, Dr. Meadow, and I take you with me.
Dearest Dr. Meadow,
I was told of your wit, love and strength before we met. You were described to me as a woman who is a superb and intuitive guide. I was told you were a leader, teacher, and always vibrantly feminine. At the conference in December 2004, you chose to speak of the imperative force of love in a successful analytic process. Dr. Meadow, I think you knew in your bones what is truly important, lasting and transcendent.
Thank you for creating a school which explores the mysteries and variables of a most fascinating way to live one's life.
Phyllis Meadow entered my life more than 30 years ago. She looked into my heart and soul and pointed to the way I could work, love, and achieve a sense of harmonious purpose in my life. She is gone, but she can never be forgotten.
Dr. Meadow was one of the most extraordinary women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Her body of work spits in the face of death. The organizations and programs she created - as well as her magnificent spirit, which she so lovingly shared and which was there for the taking for all of us who internalized a part of her strength and joy and energy - make her truly immortal.One of the last things she told me before I graduated from CMPS was that if I could learn to not fear death, I could live forever. I didn't understand what she meant then. I do now.
Her loss is immeasurable. Dr. Meadow inspired all who knew her. Her spirit was contagious, her energy boundless, her contributions are eternal. Dr. Meadow will remain a part of us forever.
Dr. Meadow was a gifted teacher, writer, researcher and clinician. Most of all she was a builder who worked with boundless energy to build a community of learners. She had a mind that was astonishing in it’s capacity to synthesize information and use it in the most inventive ways. She worked to understand people and the obstacles they erect to living more freely and fully. Once, Dr. Meadow described for me the experience of growing up in her family where there was an endless procession of people, the house was alive with activity and debate. That was Dr. Meadow. In her lifetime, she built that kind of excitement into her every day and in the process, established two psychoanalytic training programs, BGSP, CMPS and their respective treatment services. She was a pioneer in psychoanalytic education and spearheaded the successful effort to attain recognition for the first Masters degree in psychoanalysis in the country. Dr. Meadow also built a magnificent barn that houses the CZMI Doctoral program. In December in my last faculty meeting with Dr. Meadow, she worked with her usual sharp wit and understanding, in spite of her illness. As we sat in her group room, a carpenter was busy at work renovating the kitchen, tearing down a wall so that more light might flood into the dinning room. That too was Dr. Meadow, always working to let in light and illuminate dark places.
Phyllis was our friend and colleague. Her optimism, indomitable will, unerring political instinct, and genius as a psychoanalytic educator cast her as an irreplaceable figure. All who knew her are elevated to higher plane.
We will miss the many times we spent together
For years, I observed as Dr. Meadow guided my late wife Carol on intense analytic journeys. When I joined Dr. Meadow on the SMP Board, and participated on international trips and conferences, I had the privilege of experiencing first hand the searing impact of her vitality, her determination, her creativity, and--in our shared experience of widowhood--her humanity. I feel privileged to be one of the great many people whose lives are better for having come under her influence.
Dr. Meadow was the most remarkable woman I have ever met. I loved her brilliance, realness and grace. She knew how to touch my soul and mind like no one else. While her death is a tremendous loss, she will always be alive in my heart.
This world is a little less dynamic with the loss of Phyllis Meadow but she has left a legacy that will never end. Her vision, her vitality, her dedication to the ideals of psychoanlysis and the psychoanalytic process were unsurpassed. She accomplished much in her life but the most significant is the personal contact she made with others and the transmission of her ideals to work for the betterment of the human condition. I have, in these past three decades, worked alongside her and have been touched by the grace, intelligence, fun and fervor that she brought to all she did.
I will miss her very deeply.
What I find astonishing is how fulfilling my short time with her was, how much she offered of herself as well as how rich the offerings were, and how deeply she touched parts of me that had never been touched before. She taught me what I needed to know about so many things. And she did all of this with a sense of humor, grace, surefooted intellect, and love.
Dr.Phyllis Meadow will be greatly missed. I was very fortunate to have been a student of hers at the Boston Graduate School of Psychoanalysis.
My thoughts and prayers to her family and dear friends.
The loss of Dr. Meadow will be felt for a long time to come. As a latecomer to the schools in Boston and New York,I only got a glimpse of Dr. Meadow's extraordinary personality. She was indeed an inspiration to this analyst in training.