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Paul Alan Trafas

Paul Alan Trafas

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July 13, 2014
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July 13, 2014
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June 29, 2013
I was a tutor, prof and friend of Adam's at UCLA. I just saw the scene in Ghostbusters with Paul and "googled" Adam. At that point I learned of your loss. My condolences. Ironically, I am home for my mother's memorial service. She passed away on June 6.
January 09, 2013
I never got a chance to say anything at the service, so I would like to write something here.
When I first met Paul 31 years ago I was impressed by his devotion to his two boys, his integrity and honesty, his knowledge about many things, his appreciation and curiosity for all things political and philosophical, and all the stories he had to tell about his life. I didn't realize at the time that I would hear some of these stories over and over again for 31 years, but now of course I would love to hear more of those stories yet again, over and over.
Paul wore his emotions on his sleeve and sometimes they were over the top but what I always said about him was that he always had very good intentions. He always meant well. He was always concerned and interested in life, whether it was about issues or about family, which grew during our time with three daughters and three young grandchildren. He always helped out no matter what. When we lived apart he would always buy things he thought we needed, always thinking of what we could use. If we asked him to do something, he might not do everything you asked with a smile, or do it right away, but what I realize is that he always did it. He always helped.
We also always really respected his opinions, which of course he loved to share all the time, but the fact is that the girls and I always went to him for opinions as he always seemed to know something about everything and you could always count on an honest opinion. We always relied on his broad knowledge of politics, but we always found he had smart ideas about many things, from cooking, to fixing things, to what medicines to take, to his choices over things he bought the kids, from shoes to coats to what clothes looked good and even purses; he was the one who actually bought most of our purses; he always had a good eye for both the aesthetic and the practical.
When it came to the girls, he got them all involved in sports and was extremely involved and supportive as a father. He never missed the many games and if it was far, he was the one who always drove us. He attended virtually every school event and every medical appointment for the girls. He also took me to medical appts and other places whenever I needed a ride. He was always involved. He drove the girls everywhere, to all their activities. He took them out to eat and to movies and loved to have barbecues and play board games together. When the twins went away to college, he helped them move in and out, driving long distances, lugging boxes, year after year. He helped make the holidays special and we always celebrated together. He was the one who picked out and put up the Christmas trees, oversaw the decorating, carved the pumpkins with them, dyed the Easter eggs, coordinated the Easter egg hunts, cooked the holiday turkeys and lit the candles on the birthday cakes.
He introduced me and the girls to his love of outdoors and camping, to places like Glacier, Montana, Sequoia, Yosemite and the Grand Canyon. He was the one who organized family trips to places like Disneyland, Knotts Berry Farm, the zoo, his beloved UCLA football games, and the Scottish Festival. He especially loved the sound of bagpipes. One of the last of the many notes he always wrote to himself was about taking all of us and the grandchildren to Knotts Berry Farm. He always had a ton of plans, for us and for himself and I fervently wish he could have had more time.
When I think of all he did for us, I'm sure I didn't thank him enough. Sadly, he left very, very suddenly and I would like to take this chance to thank him now and I know all of us miss him tremendously. Someone said to me that he's still there; we just can't see him now. I know he will continue to be a great presence in our lives and that he will know our great appreciation.
January 09, 2013
I never got the chance to say this at the service and therefore I would like to write this here.
When I first met Paul 31 years ago I was impressed by his devotion to his two boys, his integrity and honesty, his knowledge about many things, his appreciation and curiosity for all things political and philosophical, and all the stories he had to tell about his life. I didn't realize at the time that I would hear some of these stories over and over again for 31 years, but now of course I would love to hear more of those stories yet again, over and over.
Paul wore his emotions on his sleeve and sometimes they were over the top but what I always said about him was that he always had very good intentions. He always meant well. He was always concerned and interested in life, whether it was about issues or about family, which grew during our time with three daughters and three young grandchildren. He always helped out no matter what. When we lived apart he would always buy things he thought we needed, always thinking of what we could use. If we asked him to do something, he might not do everything you asked with a smile, or do it right away, but what I realize is that he always did it. He always helped.
We also always really respected his opinions, which of course he loved to share all the time, but the fact is that the girls and I always went to him for opinions as he always seemed to know something about everything and you could always count on an honest opinion. We always relied on his broad knowledge of politics, but we always found he had smart ideas about many things, from cooking, to fixing things, to what medicines to take, to his choices over things he bought the kids, from shoes to coats to what clothes looked good and even purses; he was the one who actually bought most of our purses; he always had a good eye for both the aesthetic and the practical.
When it came to the girls, he got them all involved in sports and was extremely involved and supportive as a father. He never missed the many games and if it was far, he was the one who always drove us. He attended virtually every school event and every medical appointment for the girls. He also took me to medical appts and other places whenever I needed a ride. He was always involved. He drove the girls everywhere, to all their activities. He took them out to eat and to movies and loved to have barbecues and play board games together. When the twins went away to college, he helped them move in and out, driving long distances, lugging boxes, year after year. He helped make the holidays special and we always celebrated together. He was the one who picked out and put up the Christmas trees, oversaw the decorating, carved the pumpkins with them, dyed the Easter eggs, coordinated the Easter egg hunts, cooked the holiday turkeys and lit the candles on the birthday cakes.
He introduced me and the girls to his love of outdoors and camping, to places like Glacier, Montana, Sequoia, Yosemite and the Grand Canyon. He was the one who organized family trips to places like Disneyland, Knotts Berry Farm, the zoo, his beloved UCLA football games, and the Scottish Festival. He especially loved the sound of bagpipes. One of the last of the many notes he always wrote to himself was about taking all of us and the grandchildren to Knotts Berry Farm. He always had a ton of plans, for us and for himself and I fervently wish he could have had more time.
When I think of all he did for us, I'm sure I didn't thank him enough. Sadly, he left very, very suddenly and I would like to take this chance to thank him now and I know all of us miss him tremendously. Someone said to me that he's still there; we just can't see him now. I know he will continue to be a great presence in our lives and that he will know our great appreciation.
December 19, 2012
Dear Trafas Family,
I was deeply saddened to hear about Paul. We basically grew up together and I have many fond memories of Paul and his family. Each time I think of the Trafas family "I smile". Your family was wonderful to me and my family and I THANK YOU. Thinking of you and sending you my Love. My sincerest deepest Sympathy.

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