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Wilson Funeral Home - Panama City

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Panama City, Florida

Kathleen Merrill McLean Obituary

Kathleen (Kati) Merrill McLean, 51, passed away from her life in this world and went to be with Christ the morning of May 14, 2015. Kati inspired all who knew her with her valiant fight and peaceful acceptance of lung cancer. During her 29 month battle she continued to serve others daily and get the most out of life.
In her life and at her death, Kati's loving family surrounded her. She is survived by her husband of nearly 35 years. Norman; her mother, Janice McCulley; and brother, Robert McCulley of Nashville, Tenn.; sons, Josh, Chris and Zach; Josh's wife, Margaret; and three grandchildren, Lillian, Scarlett and Jude. She was preceded in death by her father, Ralph McCulley.
Kati, in her own words wanted to explain her relationship with Christ. In life and death she felt it her duty and obligation to share the love of the Lord. Her words follow:
"I want to be remembered as one who just loved, Jesus. Who wanted to obey Him and please Him. I spent too many years living my own life. Those spiritually anemic years I regret with all my heart. The verse, 'We all fall short of the glory of the God,' made me realize how merciful and gracious our Father is. On my Emmaus walk I was blessed with numerous letters of love. My dying moment set me free, and after all these years I finally let go and felt God's true grace. That changed my spiritual life forever.
I wanted and tried to be a good daughter, wife and mother. I know I failed and let down those I love the most. With what I have inside, I did my best. I am sorry for all the times I let you down, but please try to remember the times I didn't. I do want you all to know, I prayed for you a thousand prayers, and I will continue to do so. With all my lacking, I covered you with Christ. In reality, you belong to Him. Love Him, for He first loved you. Obey Him, go and sin no more. Dedicate your life to Him, He cares for you; and, I love you.
If you want to see me struggle, just mention my grandbabies. For the past months, knowing my fate, I look at them and my heart yearns for a life with them. Knowing they may never know me or remember me breaks my heart. I will continue to pray for them, but please smother them with prayer daily. Fill their lives with Christ and not the world.
My friends, who have loved me and supported me, from my childhood, my adulthood, and now, up until the end, God gave me you. I am thankful and blessed for each one of you who entered into my life. The letters, cards and gifts I have received over the years, up until now, have made me smile, given me courage, and encouraged me along the way. The many talks and special moments, laughter and tears we have shared are imprinted into my heart forever. Thank you for loving me, and I love you all.
One never truly believes this Journey will be 'their journey.' As soon as I found out the news I had lung cancer, I knew I needed to talk to Pastor Chris. There were a few questions I needed the answers to. The first question was 'Is it a sin to want to go to Heaven?' He gave me my confirmation of Paul who was torn with staying on earth with his Christian students, or going to be with the Lord. In my heart I was torn. My flesh and my spirit were oil and water. God had to give me peace about dying. The second question I needed Pastor Chris to answer was 'Will you do the service in the church?' Norm and I ran off at an early age to get married. I did not have a wedding in the church, which is one thing I've missed. So, to have a 'Celebration of Life' in the church is very important to me. I am of course, the bride of Christ!!! I say that with a huge smile on my face. I chose a white casket and I am donning a white dress. I am the bride to a wonderful husband who has cared for me through all of this, and now I pass to my Holy Groom for all eternity.
To those of you who many believe Christ is not important in your life, you could not be more wrong. To those who call themselves Christians and do not live accordingly, please pray and ask Jesus to reveal to you why you feel the way you do. Satan has a deception: He's okay with you thinking you are saved, but you are really not. If Christ's Holy Spirit is inside you, then you should hear His voice. God hates sin, and expects you to live a life of obedience. To those who think Salvation is for other people, but not them, you will die and go to hell. Heaven is real, and so is hell. Christ is our free gift of salvation to spend eternity with Him. God in human form came to this earth and died a death He did not deserve. He rose from the grave and conquered death. He did this because He loved us first. He paid for our sins; something we could not do. Our Creator wants us to be with Him. He will however, let you choose. You can choose to love Him or not; but let me tell you this, loving Him is the greatest journey of all. And, if you think this world is pretty cool, you should try to imagine a world of love, and perfection, shared with our Lord, Savior and King forever and ever, created from the same hands that created this world. There will be a time allowed by God to live on this world as it was meant to be, no sin, no corruption, just perfection. It states the lion will lie with the wolf and children will be able to play in viper's nests; meaning no wild life. For those who know me, have heard me say many times I will have a lion as a pet. Watch Narnia and you'll know why.
God lead the way in this journey for me and Norm. He brought us to a church family that supported us and loved us beyond measure. Thank you all. God gave us blessings along the way in the manner of strength, wisdom, peace, comfort and favor. When God asks much of you to endure, He gives you the ability to do it. He never leaves us nor forsakes us. Many nights during chemo He came and held me. He gave Norm wisdom and lent his knowledge to doctors and medications. He gave Norm strength and courage for this time. When I was scared, God provided a smothering of His presence. He allowed me to experience things only He could provide. He walked me into a deeper, more secret, and special place in my soul than I could ever imagine. He even gave me a rainbow for my birthday, because He knows rainbows are my favorite! He gave me a little white dog I did not know I would need. This dog, from the moment he came out of his crate off an airplane, has never left my side. Hours on end he laid with me during my weeks of chemo when I could not move. He truly was a gift given by God. The blessings go on and on.
I want each of you to know you can have a very special relationship with Christ. He's my everything. I'm with Him right now in His presence; I am very much alive. I want you all to celebrate life. Celebrate The One who gave you life. The one who holds your heartbeat in His hand. I had a very full life. I pray you will celebrate it. I pray you will find life a little more precious, a little more special. It is truly a gift from Jesus."
Funeral services will be held on Saturday at 2 p.m. in the Good News Methodist Church in Santa Rosa Beach with Pastor Chris Perry officiating. The family will receive friends at the church from 1 to 2 p.m., one hour prior to service time.
Wilson Funeral Home, 214 Airport Road, Panama City, Florida 32405, (850) 785-5272.

Published by Northwest Florida Daily News on May 16, 2015.
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Memories and Condolences
for Kathleen Merrill McLean

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If only we can all live the Blessed words that Kati left in her Obituary for us to read. What a special lady! Vickie and I will continue to pray for Norm and the family.

Lowery Robinson

June 8, 2015

Norm, George and I want to tell you how sorry we are about your loss. Your family is in our prayers-

George and Beverly Ruckman

May 27, 2015

I am truth sadden by the loss of my good friend. I always tried to find her on facebook but never could. May you rest in God's arm my sweet friend. Praying for her family.

Cathy Sweeney

May 23, 2015

I met Kati in middle school and continued our friendship in High School. She was someone very special to me and I am sorry to hear of her loss. God bless her family during this difficult time. Sending all my love.

Brenda Clark Brinkman

May 22, 2015

I was just sent The message about Kati and it has just taken my breath away. Norman, as you know even though years separated us, both of you mean so much to me. I was so thankful to see Kati and have dinner with her a few years back in FL. Please know that you and your entire family are in my thoughts and daily prayers. You will not be forgotten. God will continue to hold you up and shower you with His peace and love

Dianne Greer Teague

May 22, 2015

Norm, I was so sorry to hear about the loss of your beautiful and inspiring wife. I came across her powerful words and am fortunate and blessed to have known just a little bit of her heart although I did not get the opportunity to meet her personally. The thoughts of many are with you at this time and I am one of them.

Patti Muench

May 18, 2015

Prayers for all of you.. I'm so blessed to have known her and will miss her dearly....

Tiffany Julian

May 18, 2015

I am so sorry to hear that Kati has left us. Take care, Norman.

Debbie Owensby

May 18, 2015

Dear Friends -

As I scanned the obituaries and saw the words "lung cancer," I paused on this obituary because I lost my own mother to this. Once I started reading, of course I could not stop. What a beautiful lady whom I will look forward to meeting! I hope that you will all find comfort in Christ and her relationship with Him and that if any of you do not know Him, you will complete her joy and seek Him.

Karl Plenge

May 17, 2015

May God bless you and your family in this time of sorrow.

Selma Herbst

May 16, 2015

What a beautifully written message..You are such an inspiration to others...what an honor to know you so briefly, yet hear your message so powerfully! Sweet rest beautiful lady!

Jennifer D

May 16, 2015

Praying for this family during this time of grief. I did not know Kati personally, but through her obituary that she wrote herself , I feel I had to sign her guestbook. Her testimony is SO POWERFUL! God bless each of you that knew her, your life is richer having known her and the way she points to Christ!

Brenda McDaniel

May 16, 2015

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