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Cosmo Valente Obituary

Cosmo A. Valente 84, of Marlborough died peacefully on Saturday, October 12, 2013. He was the loving husband of Hazel (Lancisi) Valente for 61 years. He is survived by four children and their spouses; Raymond Valente, Trina Baillargeon and her husband Victor , Dr. Marcia Valente and her husband, Jay McBride and Saundra Lane and her husband, Tim. He is survived by eight grandchildren; Michael, Alexander, Annie, Christina, Libby, Raymond, Robert and James. He is also survived by three brothers, Lee Valente, Raymond Valente and Dr. Louis Valente as well as many nieces and nephews. Cosmo was born in Gaeta, Italy. He came to the United States at the age of two. He grew up in Milford,Massachusetts. He was the son of the late Erasmo and Maria (Salemme) Valente. He graduated from Milford High School in 1946 and earned his Bachelor of Arts degree from Boston University in 1952. He went on to earn a Masters Degree from Boston University. He served in the US Army during the Korean Conflict. Cosmo was the Director of Music in the Marlborough Public schools for 38 years. He touched the lives of countless young musicians during that time. He retired from the school system in 1990. In 1990, he was elected to the Marlborough School Committee and served with distinction until 2008. He was a tireless champion for the arts during his tenure. For over 60 years, he was the conductor of the Valente Orchestra. His band played thousands of weddings, anniversaries, mayoral and gubernatorial celebrations during that time. He was the owner of Valente Music in Marlborough from 1994 to 2013. He served as the Grand Marshall in Marlboroughs Labor Day parade in 1985 and again in 2011. He was honored as First Gentlemen of the Arts in 1985. There is no doubt that his name was synonymous with music in the City of Marlborough. Cosmo was a member of the Mass. Teachers Association,the Mass. Music Educators Association and a life-long member of the Plains Association of Milford. The funeral will be held Friday, October 18, 2013 at 10:00A.M. starting from the John P. Rowe Funeral Home Inc., 57 Main Street, Marlborough with a funeral service at 11:00A.M. at St. Mark's Episcopal Church, 27 Main Street, Southborough, MA. The service will be followed by full military honors at the church. Calling hours at the funeral home are Thursday, October 17, 2013 from 4-8 P.M. Donations to honor his memory may be sent to Tufts Medical Center Trust, 800 Washington Street, Box 231, Boston, MA 02111.

Published by Milford Daily News on Oct. 15, 2013.
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Cosmo was a wonderful man and a great friend both to us and to my parents, Stan and Ginny Sheppard of Southboro. We will miss him. God bless his memory and all of you who are fortunate to be his family.

Joe Sheppard

November 19, 2014

My condolences to the Valente family. Mr. Valente was such a huge part of my high school years. His instruction was inspiring and many of my fondest memories of high school come in no small part due to him. Band was always one of the highlights if my day. I will miss him. Requiem in pace.

Bill Watts

January 30, 2014

Mr. V was "that teacher" for me . Without his support, I had no other reason to go to MHS. Thanks and god bless you Mr.Valente

November 7, 2013

Cosmo was so many things to our family. He worked side by aside with my Aunt Antinette Testa teaching school for a good thrifty years. He tougjt my whole family at one time or another. Including my Uncle the Late Buck Barret. My two sons expressed deep sorrow for a man who was not only their mentor but he was like a grandfather. We will miss the family dinners and stories of him growing up and his music. To the Valente family you are in our hearts and prayers. Should you need anything please let us know. With Our Deepest sympathies love Collette, Matthew & Richard Sychantha.

Collette Sychantha

November 1, 2013

I was quite saddened to hear of cosmo's passing i pray for his family to band together during this loss and heal as best as possible through their love for one another Jesus gave him that musical talent and boy did he make the most of it it will be quite a loss to the music community i just want to tell you all of you will be in my prayers stay strong gina mercuri ippolito

October 21, 2013

Dear Mrs Valente and Family,
I was so saddend to hear the news about Mr Valente.
I will always remember him from being such a wonderful neighbor for so many years along with playing the bells in the band to seeing him "scoot" around Price Chopper with a great big smile on his face.If there were more people in this world like Mr. Valente how sweet it would be. He will be missed!

Cathy Hoyt-Sullivan

October 19, 2013

Our condolences to the Valente family. We will forever remember his tireless dedication and love of music.

Our four kids learned more than how to play instruments. They were inspired to be the best they could be in all future endeavors.

On a personal note, it was a pleasure to be his colleague in the Marlborough Schools for many years.

Lou and Carolyn Sardella

Lou and Carolyn Sardella

October 19, 2013

Some of the best times of my life were spent in the band room with Mr. V. I loved every minute of it. He taught us much more than music. He gave us a sense of pride in ourselves and made us feel we could do anything. I was a majorette for 4 years and in the chorus also. We weren't just any high school band, we played for Lyndon Johnson, we played at the New York World's fair, all under the direction of Mr.V. Of all of the happy memories I have of being a student at Marlboro High, being part of Mr. V's band and chorus stand out to this day. I will never forget you!!!

Joanne Gallo

October 18, 2013

To know him was to love him. The Marlborough Panther Marching band from 1983-1986 was a cast of characters. We made some great music, from Pops style, Drum and bugle corps, to top 40 hits. I remember Saturday morning practice on the lower or upper field during football season where we would line up to practice our on field routine for "Land of a thousand dances".
The trips to NYC and Washington DC gave us the band a great chance to get a little culture as well as grow as young adults. Cosmo made music fun. From calling any one of the drummers(when they were joking around at the back of the room) a "jatrool"(sp.) He told us it meant "cucumber", not sure that is true.
Cosmo loved music and he enjoyed sharing that love. He shared it with his students and the community at large. I remember our first "Pops" concert in the field-house. I will not lie and tell you we were as good as the Pops, but to see the heartwarming smile from Cosmo while we played, made all of us feel like we could very well be just as good.
Cosmo gave us all life lessons without the stern-ness that sometimes accompanies them. Cosmo made my four years of highschool more than bearable as he was not only a great teacher but a good friend.
While we all entered band practice as characters, we left as better men and women, in part due to the love and passion Cosmo had for each and every one of us. Cosmo is now sitting and playing with the likes of Benny Goodman & Glenn Miller. Marlborough has lost an icon, and I want to thank God for blessing us the time we had with an angel named Cosmo.

John J Brown III

October 18, 2013

My deepest condolences to the valente family. Such great memories growing up with a wonder teacher. You will be missed by many.

Stacey Agostini

October 18, 2013

My heart goes out to Mrs. V, Ray, Trina, Marcia, Saundra, and their families. Mr. Valente was a gentleman, a great role model (I needed one), who taught me a lot about music. I'd like you to know some of the legacy he's left.

Music performance is one of the things I enjoy most about life. My happiest times in high school involved music, and I took many music courses! I appreciate all he did for band and all the other music courses he developed and managed. For example, theory and composition serves me today as I write arrangements for a small group of singers.

My first exposure to Gershwin was in band; it was "Someone to watch over me." How fitting; he always watched over us. I've come to love Gershwin, Ellington, and my favorite hobby is singing jazz. I still play clarinet and bass clarinet in a local band in the summers.

I met my husband because I was singing the clarinet part to "The Stars and Stripes Forever" at the Boston Pops concert on the 4th of July, 1988. My husband was with some musicians who invited me to join their band, which happened to be affiliated with my place of employment.

Our two kids sing and play piano. They met Mr. V a few times when we'd stop by the store after an eye doctor's appointment next door. When I told him I'd become a torch singer for fun, he suggested that "Cry Me A River" would be a good song for me. Today, it may very well be. May peace watch over you, Mr. V!

Valerie (Collins) Rushanan

October 17, 2013

To the Valente Family May happy memories help make your sadness pass.
Mr. V made music such an important part of so many peoples lives. I am so grateful of all that he taught me about music appreciation.
I am also very appreciative for the lessons he taught me in the last 20 years about living life to the fullest despite having setbacks in his health. I never saw him down he was so in love with life. He had the best stories and memories to tell. Such an inspiration. Thank You Mr. V <3

Dawn ( Curll ) Laman

October 17, 2013

My sympathies are with the Valente family. I always appreciate that Mr. V. gave me my first teaching job to cover a maternity leave in Marlboro. (1984) I'm still teaching music in Worcester. Thinking of the Valente family, especially Marcia who served more than a few Italian dinners with me at the Andrea restaurant.

Debbie Cole

October 17, 2013

My deepest condolences to the Valente family. It was a great experience being part of the band. In a lot of ways, it was the best part of high school. At the time, we didn't think about all that Mr. V was teaching us. As I reflect back, it was so much more than music. Thank you for making us a part of your family; For giving us the confidence to step out of our comfort zones and for all the beautiful music we played together. May you rest in peace.

Cherryl (Dudley) Barrett

October 17, 2013

Mr.V made a huge impact on my life. During my 4 years in the band, it wasn't just a class you took, or a place you went to so you could practice songs. It was a place where you were always challenged to work hard at being the best you could be. Mr. V nurtured my talents as a percussionist which helped me audition and get accepted for District and State bands. But the broader effect was how it affected my own self esteem. I knew there was nothing I could not accompish if I did not work hard at it, a lesson I got from my parents, and Mr.V.
Sure, we got under his skin occasionally. After all, we were the loud and rambunctious drummers. And we got yelled at, but then you'd see that look in Mr. V's eyes and that smurk of his, and you knew he actually (sometimes) got a kick out of it.
And how about a band he formed called "Alive and Well". While we were in high school, and for a few years after, some of us had the privelege of playing in this amazing band. What an experience.
This is truly the end of an era. But I know in my heart he's up there playing his Sax and directing God's Band. I look forward to auditioning for it some day.
Thanks for everything Mr. V.

Tom Wing

October 17, 2013

I am not sure whether I should write something in this guestbook. On the one hand, this is a sad day, and a loss for Marlboroites and his friends and family. Mr. V. is and will be missed.

On the other hand, there are so many warm and funny memories of him that if I were to mention them, it might be perceived as too light-hearted and joyful for a time of mourning.

Cosmo Valente taught us about music. Cosmo Valente taught us about life. Cosmo Valente taught us the meaning of the Italian word, "cidrule!"

I remember vividly the first day I ever met him, in Hildreth School when I was in fourth grade, more than fifty years ago. Students of all instruments crowded into the small kitchen in a room off to stage left of the auditorium in the basement. It was the same room in which we would also get shots, so you can understand that it was a bit intimidating!

Mr. V. patiently showed each student how to assemble his/her instrument out of the case, and then proceeded to instruct the student on the embouchure to use in playing the instrument. Unless of course you were a drummer. Drummers could pretty much use any embouchure they wanted.

Anyway, the brass players were waiting their turn to learn, as we watched Mr. V. elicit the appropriate pucker from the face of a flute player. We thought she looked pretty silly having to make that face with her lips, and there was outright laughter at her expense from a couple of the brass players. (I was probably smirking a bit too.)

Mr. V. managed to silence that teasing right away! He said to the offenders, "Wait until you see what YOU have to do!"

The first of many points well-taken by those of us privileged to be his students!

Tom Niemczura

October 16, 2013

My sympathies go out to the Valente family. Mr. V. was one of a kind. I looked forward every day to band. It is not every day that a teacher inspires and enlightens! You will be missed. Thanks for bringing music into Marlborough Public Schools.

-Amy Domings Gogan

October 16, 2013

I was a shy freshman bell player when Mr. V insisted I should learn the bass guitar (3 bell players, no tuba that year.) I'm still playing the bass and every other instrument 40 years later as a music educator.

Remembering the classics: Hawaii Five-O, South Rampart, Victory, Washington Post, Here's Chicago, MacArthur Park.... plenty of "serious" band music, too, but the pop songs were my favorites back then.

Mr. V saw talent in me that I hadn't seen myself, and he dragged it out of me and pointed me in the right direction. I am forever grateful for his lifelong friendship and mentoring.

Good times in the band room. As others have said, an oasis of sanity for us band geeks. Lots of fun wherever we went: Kelleher Field, touring the elementary schools, Cherry Blossom Festival in DC, cultural trip to NYC......

Looking back I marvel that we were allowed to play our instruments on a MOVING SCHOOL BUS enroute to football games. Cacophony! Hats off to the bus drivers who put up with that. A wonder nobody broke a tooth or put an eye out.

Mrs.V., Ray, Trina, Marsha, Saundra and families - hugs from afar, be comforted by the best of memories. He was a great teacher and a great person who influenced thousands.

MHS Class of 1974.

Patty (Girard) Jacob

October 16, 2013

Lou and family,
So sorry for your loss. Cosmo was quite the accomplished man. There are few who can feel music to such depths, and he was one of them. No doubt, he is leading the orchestra in heaven. God bless.

Karen Villani

October 16, 2013

Mr. Valente was a wonderful role model for all of his students. He was a great story teller and made music fun for everyone--those playing and singing, and those listening. He taught us right from wrong without sermonizing and he made us all feel good about ourselves--no small feat when faced with so many different personalities and abilities. He was a HUGE influence in my life: he was my music teacher from 3rd grade at Hildreth School through high school; his orchestra played on Joe and my very first date 50 years ago, and again at our wedding. He is the reason I've picked up my e flat alto horn again (after a 46 year hiatus) and am playing in a community band, even though no-one even knows what an e flat alto horn is anymore!! (He switched me from the trumpet to that horn in high school and I'll be forever grateful.) Thank you for sharing your love of music and being such a wonderful teacher, Mr. V. The world misses you already.

Linda (Renzi) Senecal

October 16, 2013

We will always remember him organizing the children whom I had taught into a musical group at our wedding reception to entertain our guests while the photographer took a little too much time taking formal pictures elsewhere in the church!
Marjorie and Stephen Coldwell

October 16, 2013

Mrs. V, Ray, Trina, Sondra and Marcia, You are in my thoughts and prayers. There is no doubt that Mr. V touched so many, myself included. I am thankful for the many memories.

Mike Breault

October 16, 2013

I am very grateful to have known such a wonderful person.My Sincere condolences to the Valente family.GOD BLESS...A song for Cosmo...Your Spirit and Love Will Go On! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FyJvPY2XoCc

Laura Svenningsen

October 16, 2013

Cosmo Valente hired me for my first Music Teaching position. I will never forget his kindness, his respectful way of dealing with all of his teachers, and his love and passion for the job he was doing. Because of him, I understood the importance of teaching and I am still a teacher today. Thank you Mr. Valente for your sharing your incredible experience, and for training me so well.

Margaret M. Tartaglia

October 16, 2013

Dear Hazel and family,
I will always remember the fun band trips to New York and Washington as a chaperone. Always a great time, Mr V was certainly a kid at heart. Our family will miss him dearly.

Peter and Mary Ann Zaleski

October 16, 2013

What a gift we have had to have known and loved our dear Cosmo! I am forever grateful to him for allowing me to be a drummer in the Marlborough High School band. I cherish the bonfires we provided music for at St. Mark's as they prepared for the big football games with Groton, and the times I was asked to fill in with the Big Band!

Thanks to the Valente family for sharing Cosmo with the whole City of Marlborough. Without your generosity (letting him be part of our lives for so many years)the community would not have had the precious gift of his music to listen to...to dance to...to reminisce to.

Hazel, you always were the LOVE of his life! Ray and Trina and Marcia and Saundra...thank you for sharing your Dad with us all.

Know that he now lives with God...and all the other great musicians from Milford and Marlborough as they make sweet music together once again.

May God continue to shower His choicest blessings upon the Valente family!

Dick and Pearl Martino

October 16, 2013

The best part of high school was band and the friends I've made are still friends now. It's a bond we share made possible by Mr. V. He was also my next door neighbor for many years. Thank you for your support of so many, think of the hundreds, no thousands of lives you touched and how those people touched other lives - all from your influence. You will live on forever.

My sincere condolences to Mrs. Valente and Raymond, Trina, Sondra and Marcia and your families.

Suzanne Whapham Perdue

October 16, 2013

Mr. V had such a profound influence on me and so many young musicians. His love for music was a gift he shared that will last long beyond his years. I am still making music today, and just recently felt a huge amount of gratitude for the strong start and real passion for music he gave me. My most sincere condolences to all of his family.

Lisa (Russo) MacDonald

October 16, 2013

Mr. Valente,

Band was the highlight of High School for me, and I attribute that to teachers like you. Thank you for your patience, even when I showed up 25 years later looking to dust off that old clarinet.
May God Bless you.

My sincere condolences to the entire Valente family. Marlboro has lost a great man.

Laurie Barnes-Pelletier

October 16, 2013

Mr. V was not simply a teacher of music. He taught discipline and dedication. He knew how to have good clean fun. The band room was a refuge of sanity and support for many kids at MHS. For me, and for my brother Peter, Mr. V. Was far and away the best teacher in the high school. I have so many wonderful stories of him. Who could ever forget the Marlboro-Methuen football game? My own teaching at U of Hawaii is influenced by Mr. V. I will never forget how he came to the funeral of one of the former band members who died tragically in a motorcycle accident - he knew just what to say. At marching band practice, I learned the meaning of the word "chooch" and other Italian words from him. I played trumpet, and he worked with veteran's groups to provide somebody to play 'taps' which got me release time. I still play trumpet, and Friday I will play taps in Honolulu Hawaii in his honor. MHS class of 1973.

Joe Niemczura

October 16, 2013

Mu thoughts and prayers go out to the entire Valente family. Mr. V was a great man. My fondest memories in high school was a member of the high school band. Mr. V made band so much fun and was a huge influence on so many lives. He will truly be missed. Rest in peace Mr. V.

Ray Dube

October 15, 2013

My condolences to all his family & friends. He will be dearly missed by anyone who had the privilege of knowing him. Thanks for the fond memories of music throughout my grade school years!
God bless.

Fran Visconti

October 15, 2013

One of a kind. Such a great inspiration to so many. Thank you for all you have done for the youth of Marlboro and beyond, you will be missed. God speed Mr. V

Mark Devlin

October 15, 2013

The name "Cosmo Valente" brings many fond memories of music and light from my childhood in Marlborough. Prayers, blessings and gratitude for this musical man.

Jennifer Toone Corrigan

October 15, 2013

My condolences to the family of Mr. Valente. If you ever lived in Marlboro you know of Mr. V. Throughout my school yrs. He was music. He made chorus fun and exciting. i can still remember singing Moon River -Sound of Music and other popular songs at that time. he wasnt afraid to use pop songs and thats part of the reason everyone loved him in school.I'm sure u all were always very proud of him.
Class of '64 student

Maryanne B.

October 15, 2013

My condolences to the Valente family-Mr V introduced me to the trumpet in 1958-because of him and his wonderful teaching I had a great career in music for years both full and part time-thank-you so much

Paul Turner

October 15, 2013

My deepest condolences to the whole Valenti family. My life is richer just knowing and working with Mr V. I will treasure the memories

Melissa Kronenfeld Riley

October 15, 2013

Prayers for the family. I remember him well as a music teacher. He taught us hit songs for the time. Rest in peace. Sir

pamela pervier [ Smith ]

October 15, 2013

My condolences to al the Valente Family.
In addition to my job as a substitute teacher, I used to work in the deli dept. at Victory Supermarket.With both of us having come from Milford, Cosmo and I would mention people we both knew. He was always pleased with the way I sliced his prociutto "thin". I'll bet he will please many people in heaven with his love of music. May God Bless all of you.
Janice(Consoletti)Wagner

October 15, 2013

My thoughts and prayers are with all of you. I remember junior band and having to go to the high school when I was in elementary school and thinking what a wonderful adventure music would be. He had a huge impact on my life and on my 3 children. Thank you for the music and your caring for everyone you came in contact with. May God bless all of you.

Grac Sheldon Lyons

October 15, 2013

My deepest sympathies to the whole Valente family. Mr. V. meant so much to me as he did to "band buddies" everywhere. He knew most of us would never become musicians, but he also knew that the discipline learning music brings would help us in any profession we pursued.
Thank you for being a voice for the arts, for being the lynchpin for the collective memories of so many graduates of M.H.S., for the free lunch periods and for being my friend.

Lisa Trudeau

October 15, 2013

Brings to mind the lyrics of the song "leader of the band" "His blood runs through my instrument, and his song is in my soul". Rest peacefully Mr. V! Heather Kurbs Gould

Heather Gould

October 15, 2013

Dr Valente, sorry for the loss of your father, may the comfort of all your family and friends comfort you and your family, thinking of you, Mary and Kevin Thebado

Mary Thebado

October 15, 2013

I was so sorry to read of Cosmo's death. I will always remember the band playing the theme song from Hawaii 50. The band room was next to mine so I was always entertained.
Carolyn Pope
Brookfield, Ma.

October 15, 2013

I am so sorry to hear of the passing of such a wonderful music director for many years. He was an awesome man and lots of patients with us in band. I am sure his family will miss him very much. Rest in peace and we all know he is in a better place now. U were the best. and u also played at my wedding.

Anna Mae Grout

October 15, 2013

My best part of high school was band and Mr. Valente. I was proud to be a band buddy. I loved it all...concerts, marching, playing in the stand at football games, wearing the uniform. Who can forget the "parsley on the collar" speech? Mr. Valente was a gifted, talented and special man who will be missed by me and so many. Rest peacefully, you have left your mark. With prayers and love to the family.

Allison Krebs Hassard

October 15, 2013

Mr V, you changed the lives of many in more ways than you know. RIP!

Dianne (Weldon) Cook

October 15, 2013

Marcia and family I am so sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. I'm happy I had the chance to really get to know him and your mom while in Sudbury. He was a wonderful person.

Roseanna Stevens

October 15, 2013

Our sympathies to your family in this great loss. Cosmo played at our wedding 37 years ago and I'll always remember him with warm feelings. RIP Cosmo and know that you were loved by all.

Russ & Deborah Klee

October 15, 2013

Ray,
Sorry to hear about your dad, he meant so much to so many.
God bless.

John Cole

October 15, 2013

He was a gentleman, a scholar, a leader and a role model for so many Marlboro youth. Such a vigorous and vibrant part of Marlboro for so many years. Thanks for all you did for Marlboro Mr. V. !

Rich Wellen

October 15, 2013

I am so sorry for your loss. I had Mr. Valente from Bigelow School, through high school (chorus) and when I had questions regarding school issues when my children attended, he was always a big help to me. He was kind, dedicated, smart and devoted to what he loved. I'm sure he will be missed by many. My condolences to all of his family and friends.

Carol Mitchell

October 15, 2013

I can't even express my saddness for your loss. He was such a wonderful man and he was not just a teacher but a friend to my family.

Paula Zaleski-Ward

October 15, 2013

I am so sorry to hear this news. Mr. Valente was very special to all the people of Marlboro, but especially its children. My three children included. They share a love of music because of him. My best to Mrs. Valente, Raymond and the rest of the family.

Cathy Bailey

October 15, 2013

Mr. V was SUCH a big part of my High School years. Mr. V was music in Marlboro. I often saw him around town and I was always greeted with a hug...and a how are you doing. He was a great man who will be missed by many.... Ray, Trina, Marcia, and Saundra May your many happy memories bring you peace during this difficult time.

Jane Voyta-Peatersen

October 15, 2013

Dear Marcia and Family,
My heartfelt sympathy for the loss of your beloved father. I am just one of many professional musicians who got their start with your Dad. There is a lot more music and joy in the world because of him.

Sandy Winters (Rowe)

October 15, 2013

Dear Valente family, "Mr. V" was so important to so many of us during elementary, junior high and high school as head of the music program. He was a roll model who can never be replaced. God Bless.

Susan Ferrechio

October 15, 2013

My deepest condolences to the Valente family; hearing his name brings back many fond memories of a true gentleman who so loved passing on his love and knowledge of music to so many kids that grew up in Marlboro.My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Kathleen Moynihan

October 15, 2013

Mr. Valente made my high school years memorable. He cemented my interest in playing in band that carried through my college career. My best to his family.

Nancy (Colley) de Fiebre

October 15, 2013

Dear Raymond and family
I am so sadden to hear about the loss of your dad. My thoughts and prayers our with you at this time.

Mary Schofield

October 15, 2013

Mr.Valente was one of a kind. He was so very special to me. I will sorely miss him. My condolences to his wonderful family. Much Love,Linda(Wing) Greengo

Linda Greengo

October 14, 2013

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