Search by Name

Search by Name

JUDITH FEDER Obituary

FEDER--Judith D. Beautiful and beloved wife of her devoted husband, Tapani Talo, adoring mother of Eliel and Eero, cherished daughter of Bob and Marge, loving sister to Susan, Ben, Jessica and Abigail, doting aunt of Sam, Basia, Brent, Danya, Seth, Zachariah and the late Maximillian, wonderful friend. Judy was a brilliant scholar (summa cum laude and Phi Beta Kappa, Princeton '78), talented singer and musician, linguist, and valued manager of the New York office of Brodeur International. Initially diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer in 2001, she fought an unceasing battle (never in remission), unwilling to cede an iota to the disease. Her own long struggle and experiences led her to conceive Patient Wisdom, a forthcoming product for the next generation of online patient communities. Her meditations on simple joys over the past nine years inspired all who knew her. Funeral Sunday 1pm. Bet Am Shalom Synagogue, 295 Soundview Ave, White Plains. Contributions may be made to the Princeton University Class of 1978 Foundation, 102 Tanglewood Lane, Newtown Square, PA 19073.

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by New York Times on Apr. 24, 2010.

Memories and Condolences
for JUDITH FEDER

Not sure what to say?





Andrea Meier

May 2, 2010

Although I knew that Judy was very ill and in hospice, I was deeply saddened to hear of her death.

Judy and I were virtual friends and colleagues for 4 years. We met briefly at a conference in Washington DC where we both presented on online support groups. She stayed in touch with me on this shared interest and encouraged me to continue my research in this area even though funding was hard to find. Amazingly, she invested her time and energy in trying to get funding to start a project of online support for people with chronic diseases. As part of that project, we conducted a survey and later collaborated in writing a paper and producing 2 conference presentations Second conference presentation was the Medicine 2.0 conference last summer when she was beginning the final decline. She attended the conference despite being quite ill.

Although we had numerous phone conversations, I regret that we met in person only three times. But always, I was impressed with and moved by her generousity, vision and dedication to helping empower patients and caregivers using Internet support and information resources.

She was a remarkable being and an inspiration. She will be will be missed.

I hold you, Tapani, Eliel, Eero and the rest of your family in the Light as you traverse these dark times.


Andrea Meier

Jeannie P

April 29, 2010

I just found out about Judy. I am so very sorry!!! I communicated via email with her for some years and have admired her since we'd met online some years ago.

I was already supporting a dear friend with bc mets for about 4-5 years by then and she's already in heaven 4 years.

I still come to the bcmets board since I have become somewhat of a local resource and still support and do BC awareness work. I also still have many whom I know with this blasted disease.

I hope and pray for your healing, dear Judy's family! May you know peace now, in your hearts.

Judy will be missed by many but she will never truly be gone since she has touched and helped so many! Judy is a hero, as are all battling this beast.

May God bless you all and hold you close in your grief.

Jeannie P.

Jane Sterett

April 29, 2010

I knew Judith online as part of a metastatic breast cancer group since she joined in 2005, and she was always a voice of wisdom and inspiration. I'm so sorry she is gone.

Tapani Talo

April 27, 2010

Thank You all so much for Remembering and your beautiful comments,
Tapani Talo, Husband

Joan Hartman

April 26, 2010

Judy was admired by whole extended music community while at Princeton, not only for her incredible musicality, but also as the epitome of beauty and grace. She touched many more people than she ever knew.

April 26, 2010

I am very saddened to hear about Judy. We were actresses together at WMAC (double-cast in Dark of the Moon), sang together in the Westchester Philharmonic Choral Society and competed for the part of Luisa in The Fantasticks (she won!). Many happy memories. Judy will always have a place in my heart. Amy Syd Israeloff Babcock (Westford, MA)

Ilene Winkler

April 26, 2010

Judy was a support and inspiration to so many women living with metastatic breast cancer. She became a hotline volunteer in 2008 for SHARE, Self-Help for Women with Breast or Ovarian Cancer. She was a lovely woman and so helpful to our callers who spoke with her. Our thanks and deepest sympathy to her family.

Amos Kermisch

April 26, 2010

I am so saddened to learn of Judy's death. I met Judy while we worked at Brodeur. She was so talented, competent, smart and impressive. It was a joy working with her. My deepest sympathy to her family.

Mark Harkins

April 26, 2010

I feel lucky to have had the opportunity to know Judy. She was an incredible person made stronger by those around her. She will be long remembered for the thoughtful emails she wrote at a time when most of us would have shunned the world.

To Tapani, Eliel and Eero, my heart and prayers are with you as well as to Susan, Ben, Jessica, Abby, Bob and Marge.

Her spirit will live on in all of us who continue the struggle against this dread disease.

Denise Sacks

April 25, 2010

I am sorry for your loss. I knew Judy at Highlands Jr. H.S. We were in many classes together and I remember how talented and gifted she was. She excelled in everything. She was a kind and caring friend and class mate. My sympathy to her family.

Musa Mayer

April 25, 2010

I was very sorry to learn of Judy's death, though not surprised, sadly, and send my condolences to her family, friends and colleagues. I knew Judy through her involvement with a mailing list called BCMETS, www.bcmets.org for women with metastatic breast cancer and their families. She first joined our online community in October 2005, and was always a loyal, thoughtful and supportive voice for better treatments for herself, and for other women. She will be sorely missed by many of us, and long remembered.

Celeste Leibowitz

April 25, 2010

I knew Judy many years ago when we were girls at SAAC (Science and Arts Camp) in Port Ewen, NY. Judy always impressed me with her smiling face and her happy demeanor. She was a terrific singer. After hearing her star as The Girl in "The Fantasticks," the off Broadway show couldn't hold a candle to her. We hadn't been in touch for at least 40 years but when I read of her death I was immeasurably saddened. My condolences to her family and friends. RIP Judy, blithe spirit.

April 24, 2010

To Judy's family:
I am so sorry to hear this news. I had met Judy at several meetings and been in periodic e-mail contact with her (what witty, precise messages!), and I'll miss her very much. I'm sorry I won't be able to attend her funeral and hope you will accept my condolences from cyberspace.

Sincerely,
Trudy Balch

Beth Fass

April 24, 2010

Dear Marge and Robert. I am very sorry to learn of your loss. I am sure that Judith was a wonderful daughter, mother, sister, friend, musician and will be missed by many. Fondly, Beth Fass

Anne Wilson

April 24, 2010

My love to all of you who will be at Sunday's Service for Jude. I am there in spirit. She was a gift of the gods to us. We are so lucky to have had her in our lives.

Christina Rae

April 24, 2010

RIP Judy. You were a terrific woman. I always admired your strength and grace. My condolences to your family -- who you loved so dearly and fought so hard to be with.

Ellen Kirschner

April 24, 2010

I am so, so, so sorry to learn that Judith passed away. My heart goes out to the whole extended family.

Showing 1 - 17 of 17 results

Make a Donation
in JUDITH FEDER's name

Memorial Events
for JUDITH FEDER

To offer your sympathy during this difficult time, you can now have memorial trees planted in a National Forest in memory of your loved one.

How to support JUDITH's loved ones
Honor a beloved veteran with a special tribute of ‘Taps’ at the National WWI Memorial in Washington, D.C.

The nightly ceremony in Washington, D.C. will be dedicated in honor of your loved one on the day of your choosing.

Read more
Attending a Funeral: What to Know

You have funeral questions, we have answers.

Read more
Should I Send Sympathy Flowers?

What kind of arrangement is appropriate, where should you send it, and when should you send an alternative?

Read more
What Should I Write in a Sympathy Card?

We'll help you find the right words to comfort your family member or loved one during this difficult time.

Read more
Resources to help you cope with loss
Estate Settlement Guide

If you’re in charge of handling the affairs for a recently deceased loved one, this guide offers a helpful checklist.

Read more
How to Write an Obituary

Need help writing an obituary? Here's a step-by-step guide...

Read more
Obituaries, grief & privacy: Legacy’s news editor on NPR podcast

Legacy's Linnea Crowther discusses how families talk about causes of death in the obituaries they write.

Read more
The Five Stages of Grief

They're not a map to follow, but simply a description of what people commonly feel.

Read more
Ways to honor JUDITH FEDER's life and legacy
Obituary Examples

You may find these well-written obituary examples helpful as you write about your own family.

Read more
How to Write an Obituary

Need help writing an obituary? Here's a step-by-step guide...

Read more
Obituary Templates – Customizable Examples and Samples

These free blank templates make writing an obituary faster and easier.

Read more
How Do I Write a Eulogy?

Some basic help and starters when you have to write a tribute to someone you love.

Read more