Joyce G. McCray

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Joyce McCray Obituary

McCRAY JOYCE GEVIRTZ McCRAY Passed away Monday, November 1 in her new home in Falmouth, Maine. She was at peace and surrounded by her daughter Susan, Susan's partner Yvette, and her close friends Pat and Dick Barter. Joyce was born in Hammond, Indiana to Dr. Milton B. Gevirtz and Madeline Wilson Gevirtz on September 28, 1932. Joyce's family includes her three children, Jennifer McCray Rincon, Wilson McCray, and Susan McCray. Jennifer and her husband Carlos Rincon live in Denver, CO with their three children: Catalina, Sonia, and Carlo. Catalina is a freshman at American University in Washington, DC. Wilson lives with his wife, Judy Weaver, in Heredia, Costa Rica. Susan lives with her partner, Yvette Pratt, in South Portland, Maine. All three of Joyce's children have pursued careers in education and the arts. Joyce was married for nearly 20 years to the father of their three children, Dr. Richard Smith McCray. Joyce graduated from Hammond High School in 1950. She attended Wellesley College, and as President of her class, graduated in 1954. She went on to earn a Masters degree in Sociology from Yale University and a Masters degree in Business Administration from Harvard University. While a devoted mother and grandmother, Joyce committed her professional life to education. She was the Principal of Friends Seminary in New York City from 1977-1989, and then moved to Washington, DC where she became the Executive Director of the Council for American Private Education. She contributed an indescribable amount to her profession, sitting on many Boards of Directors, most notably of the Collegiate School in New York City and the William Penn Charter School in Pennsylvania. She was also an active member of many organizations, including the Headmasters Association, The Head Mistresses Association of the East, and The Country Day School Headmasters' Association. She had a profound, lasting impact on the world of education and on the lives of so many students and staff. She was an admired mentor and role model, a revered colleague, and had a spirit that allowed all those around her to flourish. She will be greatly missed. There will be a celebration of her life at the Friends Meeting House, 222 East 16th Street in New York City on Friday, November 12, 2010, 4 p.m. In lieu of flowers, please feel free to send donations to: The Joyce G. McCray Fund, c/o Patty Ziplow, Development Office, Friends Seminary 222 East 16th Street, NYC, NY 10016

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Published by The Washington Post on Nov. 9, 2010.

Memories and Condolences
for Joyce McCray

Sponsored by Jonathan Stapleton.

4 Entries

Jonathan Stapleton

February 1, 2011

I was a French teacher at Friends when Joyce took over as principal. From the start she was gentle but firm, and led by example rather than dictate. Her door was always open and no concern was too small to get her complete attention. Do read “The Darling Principal” by Nancy Gibbs as she has captured the essence of Joyce’s tenure in a way I could never hope to match. Instead I would like to share an anecdote.

Years after leaving Friends, I ran into Joyce at a conference, and she told me the other side of the rappelling incident. Unbeknownst to us who had watched from the safety of the ground, the idea of dangling in mid-air had been quite terrifying. This didn’t stop her. With typical fortitude, she swallowed hard, climbed over the edge, and slid gracefully down the rope with a big smile on her face. She then admitted she had been having serious doubts about whether she would be up to handling the myriad problems Friends was going through (this blew me away as we’d all thought she was on top of everything). Fortunately, after her leap of faith she had an epiphany: “If I can slide down the side of the building on a skinny rope, I can run this school!” and from then on, she was as confident as she had always looked. She more than improved Friends Seminary - she made it a “home” most of us will never forget.

It is with deep regret that I learned Joyce is no longer with us. Just knowing she was out there somewhere was always a source of solace. She was by far the best principal I ever had, and she was also a solid friend. Her energy, warmth, and the way she could light up a room were unequaled. I will miss her.

Kassie Marshall

January 31, 2011

I have fond memories of lively parties and happy sleep-overs at the McCray house. I send my love and condolences to Jennifer, Susan and Wilson.
- Kassie (Brearley '76)

November 11, 2010

My condolences to Joyce's family. She played a key role in a major turning point in my life. If it wasn't for her I would never have gone to Friends. My mother and father were trying to figure out a good match for me after boarding school didn't work out and were meeting with representatives at various schools. When they met Joyce they knew right away that it was the right school for me. My father said that Joyce had a force of character that was palpable. She combined a sense of caring with a "no nonsense" straightforward style. My parents felt that I wasn't going to be ignored or given up on at Friends and they were equally confident that I wasn't going to be able to pull the wool over her eyes. Thankfully, both turned out to be true.

Phil Fisher '85