Mary Reid Obituary
This obituary was originally published in the Richmond Times-Dispatch.
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May 20, 2011
Woody, Susie and Myra,
I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your mom. She was indeed a very special lady and I know how very much you and all of the family will miss her. I pray that soon many happy memories will replace the heartache you are feeling now.
Love,
Debbie Marshall Agnew
Melinda Meyer Gold
May 17, 2011
My condolences to your family. I lived at the top of the couldesac. She was a very nice lady.
Carolyn & Alex Harris
May 16, 2011
We have so many fond memories of Mary and the special family get togethers when we were younger. It would have been great to have lived closer and spent more time together in recent years, but the visits we have had and phone calls have been precious. What a sense of humor and love of laughter she did have--she was uplifting to be with. Our thoughts and prayers are with all of the family she leaves behind, but we find joy in knowing she has a new body and new life.
With love, Carolyn and Alex Harris
Beverly Pierce
May 16, 2011
Mary was such a lovely lady! To know her was to laugh and love her! Praying for peach and God's comfort in the coming days. Thank you for sharing her journey with us!
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elinor Dark
May 16, 2011
May God be with your family.
Retiree IMB
Elinor Dark
Susie Reid
May 15, 2011
Hello All,
This is Susie Reid, Eddie and Mary's youngest (one of the twins). I want to share with you Mom's struggle since Dad's death in 2007.
It actually started in March 2006 when Mom had both knees replaced. The anesthesia triggered the dementia waiting in Mom's brain to take over her life. And it did. She was eventually diagnosed with Alzheimer's. After this surgery, she was never the same.
Mom retired from the International Mission Board in 1989 but immediately returned there part-time (3 days a week) until she was 80 years old!
In the fall of 2004, Dad (Eddie) fell and broke his hip. Our family decided that we needed to get Mom and Dad in a single story home so in February of 2005, we moved them to a rancher in the same neighborhood, leaving their home on Asbury Court, where they lived 43 years.
In January 2007, Dad died. He had been diagnosed with Alzheimer's but we found out at the end that he had mantle cell lymphoma in the brain. He died 8 days after going to the hospital.
Mom had never in her life lived alone and with Myra and I working, we couldn't provide the companionship/care she needed. So we found wonderful caregivers who lived with Mom in her home until July 2010. Without them, Mom would have had to go to a nursing home much sooner. (Thank you Shirley, Abby and DeDe!)
In July 2010, Mom started falling a lot. Thankfully she never broke anything, but her legs just stopped holding her up. After a lengthy hospitalization, it was determined that Mom could not walk and we had to make the difficult decision to move her to a nursing home. We had hopes that physical therapy would get her back on her feet but that never happened. Her brain just wasn't "talking" to her legs anymore.
So, she lived at Our Lady of Hope Nursing Center from July 2010 until April 19, 2011. We developed a schedule where Mom would have somebody (me, Myra, family or friends) visit her EVERY night of the week and Myra and I each took a day of the weekend to be with her. At first, she was in a regular wheelchair and could stand long enough to transfer to the bed. Eventually, she couldn't do that and had to be moved from chair to bed and bed to chair using a sling lift. Over time, it got to where Mom couldn't move arms or legs and couldn't roll over in the bed on her own. The Alzheimer's was simply taking away her physical abilities as well as her memory. Gratefully, she always knew who we were.
The nurse there called on April 19th and said she thought Mom was dehydrated. So she was transported to the hospital where we learned she was dehydrated but also had pneumonia in one lung. Two days later, blood tests revealed sepsis, infection throughout her bloodstream. The doctors said we could take her to ICU and pump her full of drugs and get her through it (for the 2nd time in two months) but asked us, what is it you are trying to get her back to? Consider her quality of life. We decided on April 21st to move Mom to hospice care in the hospital. It was then that all antibiotics, food and fluids were stopped and we let God take over. Mom stayed in the hospital in hospice for 14 days, until Medicare would no longer cover an in-hospital stay. We had to decide whether to send her back to the nursing home or to take her to her home until God was ready to take her. WE TOOK HER HOME! For the first time since leaving her house back in July to go to the hospital, she came back home on May 6. We were so glad we could do that for her. Although she wasn't really conscious in her last days, we felt she knew she was home, and we spent our last Mother's Day with her on the 8th. Because I have an employer, the University of Richmond, that puts family first, I was able to take off all this time to be by Mom's side. For the most part, I was with her 24/7. I'm sure this did me more good than it did her. Of course, Myra and Woody were there as much as their jobs would allow. And Woody's wife Alisa sat many days in the hospital with us, as did Heidi, Mom's eldest granddaughter who is also employed at the International Mission Board. Myra and I both slept in the livingroom with Mom her last three nights on earth. Heidi and I (and CNA Ella) were by her side talking to her when she took her last breath. We told her to hug all those that had gone before us...Dad, Billy, MeeMaw and PeePaw, Windy, Uncle Jack, Aunt Clara Lee and Aunt Susie to name just a few. She had gone 23 days without food, 21 days without fluids; she finally let go. But wasn't she tough!!!!!
Her service yesterday was beautiful, despite the cloudy skies. She looked beautiful, and so much at peace. In her coffin were the ashes of her eldest son Billy who died of cancer in 2009; his childhood Bible; the ashes of her last two pets, Piggy and Maggie; her father's mason's apron and her mother's hair that was cut off when she had to have brain surgery after a fall many years ago. Also, the newspaper that was in Dad's hospital room the day he died and a newspaper from the day Mom died were in there with her.
I will miss her more than I can say. In fact, I don't know life without her so I'll have to figure that out. I loved my mother dearly and I'm so glad we were able to take her back home. It made this whole end of life thing that we all must face a lot more bearable.
To Mom: It will take me a while to figure out life without you, but know that we will all be fine here until it is our time to be with you again in heaven. As we sang yesterday...when we all get to heaven, what a glorious day it will be. Thank you for raising me to be a good person. I will continue to live my life in a way as to make you proud. And don't worry... Myra and Woody and I will take care of each other. And we'll keep an eye on Aunt Maude for you too! I love you Mom!!! Rest easy, your job here is done. And again, hug my Dad and brother and let them know how much I miss them. I will look forward to the day we are all together again.
Mary Mountcastle
May 15, 2011
Mary will really be missed by our "Lunch Bunch", she was a wonderful lady to be with and we will always miss her so.
Mary Mountcastle, Jackie Harmon, Joyce Glover, Mary Eldridge
May 14, 2011
Mary was a "hoot' to work with. I don't know who tease who the most, I do know that I missed her terribly when she retired. The God worked in His mysterous ways and brought Heidi into my life.
I mysteriously gave Mary a large statue of an Angel at Christmas time. She never knew that I gave her the Angel to look over now the Angels are looking over Mary. I loved Mary but am so glad she is no longer suffering.
Joyce Miller
Richmond, VA
Mary Eldridge, IMB Retiree
May 14, 2011
Special friends come into our lives over the years, and Mary was one. She brought kindness and laughter to all she met. I was blessed each time we got together over the years. My condolences to each one of you in the family; she loved you so much. You are in my prayers and thoughts.
Donna Beth Conklin
May 13, 2011
To my dear family...I so wish I could be with you tonight, and tomorrow as you lay my sweet Aunt Mary to rest. I write this with a heavy heart knowing that I cannot be there to hug you all and to pay my final respects to a woman that meant the world to me. Aunt Mary was more than an Aunt. She was one of those special people that walks into your life and leaves footprints on your heart. I have so many fond memories of her (too many to list here). I was telling Mom that I think all of our time spent with Aunt Mary was fun because she always made it fun. I have laughed with her, and cried with her too. I do want to share a few memories...one is actually a time I visited with Mom when I was around 28 or so. When we arrived, I was so tired, so as we sat in the den and talked, I laid down on the couch with my head in Aunt Mary's lap, and she rubbed her fingers through my hair until I fell asleep. As silly as this may be to some people, it was precious to me. Another thing I remember is going to O'Briensteins at Regency Mall. LOVED going there. Also, that awesome bird, Fred. I know you all will remember the words I taught him one weekend I was there visiting. You know....the ones where he said "Be Nice" after he said them because Aunt Mary kept fussing at him when he repeated what I taught him :) What I want to say is that I loved this woman with all my heart, and she was so much more than an Aunt. She was an angel, and now she's watching over me all the time. I know we will all miss her deeply, but I also know that she is so happy in Heaven with all the ones that have gone before her. I look forward to the day I can see her again, but until then, I will hold her memory fondly in my heart.
I love you all and again, I wish I could be there. Hugs and kisses to all.
Mary Vanaman Mallory
May 13, 2011
Myra I am sorry to hear of your Mother's passing. She has a special memory from my childhood as one of my Mother's great friends, and the thing I remember the most was her laugh. She had such a fast and ready laugh all the time. I loved hearing her talk! My thoughts are with you and you family. Peace to you all.
margaret cobb
May 13, 2011
Woody & Family
My heart goes out to you and family members at this time, may God bless you and help you get through this difficult time. It is a tough road to travel,but time will help. God Bless.
Tony Troxel
May 13, 2011
Its my prayer that God give you peace during time of sadness and until you all can meet again with Him in Heaven.
May 12, 2011
Mary will be missed and she was a friend for many years
Larry Cox
May 12, 2011
Mary was a very special friend and colleague at the IMB. It was a blessing to be around her as she spread joy to everyone who was privileged to know her. She was a "hoot" and every time I think of her I smile.
Irma & Mike Fetz
May 12, 2011
To my cousins,
Our thoughts and prayers are with all of you in your time of grief. May your memories bring you comfort. I will always have fond memories of my Aunt Mary and she will be greatly missed. So sorry we can't be with you in person.
May 12, 2011
Mary could light up a room with her smile and whit. A beautiful lady inside and out. You special lady rest in peace. My thoughts and prayers are with all of the family. Connie Bostic, Retired IMB Co-worker
May 12, 2011
Mary was a delightful and fun-loving co-worker. I shall remember our many times at lunch and the laughs we shared. Rest in peace, dear Mary! Lori Sherwood
Janice McCallum
May 12, 2011
Mary will truly be missed. She was one of the first people I met at the IMB when I came to work here years ago. She always had a smile on her face and no one was a stranger. She is up in heaven looking down on us now telling us do not be sad she is now with God.
Janice McCallum, former IMB co-worker
May 12, 2011
Mary was a very special part of our "caregivers group" at the board. We've missed her and the laughter she brought to the group. Anita Bowden, IMB employee and caregiver member
May 12, 2011
What a fine woman Mary was....at work always a smile and cheerful greeting for everyone. She will be missed!!
Joye Russell, former IMB co-worker
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1771 North Parham Road, Richmond, VA 23229
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