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Stephen Aylward Obituary

Lt. Col. Stephen R. Aylward (Ret.), 57
PORTLAND -- Stephen R. Aylward, 57, of Portland, died in a motor vehicle accident on Thursday, Oct. 6, 2011. Stephen was born in Salem, Mass., the son of Richard and Nathalie Aylward and moved to Maine at the age of two. Having grown up in Deering Center at 12 Alden Circle, he attended Chapman Elementary and Lincoln Middle Schools. He then graduated from Deering High School in 1972 and went on to attended the University of Maine Orono with a double major in political science and economics.
He volunteered to serve in Vietnam near the end of the conflict, but was told by the recruiters he would better serve his country by going through ROTC and becoming an officer.
Stephen served in the Army 20 years both as a Field Artillery Fire Support officer, and as a Foreign Area officer whose area of specialty was Southeast Asia. While serving his country in this capacity he helped facilitate the building of a school in Laos, delivering food and supplies to Somalia, carried out diplomatic missions in Indonesia, Malaysia, Japan and Thailand. He was also responsible for orchestrating 'Pacific Army Management Seminars' in Bangladesh, Australia, Korea, and Hawaii.
His last years in the military were spent working at the Pentagon as a staff officer in the Defense Intelligence Agency. As part of his education in the Army he attended North Carolina State University and obtained his graduate degree in International Relations.
Upon completion of his distinguished military service Stephen attended the University of Maryland and completed his Ph.D. in Philosophy. His doctoral dissertation was written on 'Interjurisdictional Competition and Urban Fragmentation' and was published in 2005. He had a passion for teaching and taught in several community colleges before being hired by Saint Joseph's College in Standish to teach Political Science and History.
Stephen was very active with local politics. During high school he was interested in the Model Cities program and served on the student council. When he moved back to Portland after serving in the Army, he became active with the Portland Trails program. He adopted and developed the trail at the end of his street, and it was added to the trail's system and named the 'Riverton Rail Trail.' He was elected to the City of Portland Land Bank committee and was a valuable contributor to its mission.
He was the oldest of two children and is survived by his father, Richard Aylward; and sister, Deborah Aylward, RN, BSN of Portland. He married Helen (Joyce) Aylward in 1986. They have three children, Stephanie Shepherd and Justin Dyer of Virginia, and Joshua Dyer of Georgia. They also have seven grandchildren, Troy, Kevin, Hailey, Dylan, Carver, Shelby and Brielle.
Visiting hours will be held from 9:30 to 11 a.m. on Wednesday, Oct. 12, 2011, at Independent Death Care, 660 Brighton Ave., Portland; followed by a funeral service at 11 a.m. Interment will be at Evergreen Cemetery in Portland. To offer words of condolence to the family, sign a guest book and share memories, go to the obituary page at www.independentdeathcare.com.
The family requests that in lieu of flowers, memorial
donations be made to:
Portland Veterans' Acupuncture Clinic Care of Mary Chaney, L. Ac.
778 Forest Ave.
Portland, Maine 04103
Lt. Col. Stephen R. Aylward (Ret.)

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by Portland Press Herald/Maine Sunday Telegram on Oct. 9, 2011.

Memories and Condolences
for Stephen Aylward

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Patricia Joyce

October 3, 2019

We miss you.

Patty Joyce

October 25, 2011

My German Shepherd Karlie would like to thank Steve for teaching her to howl. When she was a pup, I brought her over to Helen and Steve's house and the lesson began. Steve got right down on the floor on his back, put Karlie on his chest and began howling. She jumped right in!! We love you Steve and know that you and Occy are looking over us.

Helen Aylward

October 24, 2011

To Infinity and Beyond my Love!
Helen
xxxooo

Lindsay Bryant

October 20, 2011

I had Steve as an instructor at Southern Maine Community College. He was a very kind and cared about his students. I am so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with your family. God Bless.

Karen Willett Bovill

October 19, 2011

So very sad for the loss of Steve.
My thoughts and prayers are with all the family.

October 14, 2011

Col. didn't know you, sorry for your family's loss, thank you for your military service
-from a vet

cheryl hall

October 14, 2011

helen & deb & family,
so sorry to hear of your loss.my thoughts and prayers are with you both.
sincerely sorry
cheryl hall

October 13, 2011

so sorry to hear of steve's passing.he was a kind and caring man. he seemed interested in what was going on in the neighbor. our prayers are with his family...........joe and judy minervino [portland]

Helen Aylward

October 13, 2011

To infinity and beyond!!!!
Love Helen

greg desjardin

October 12, 2011

Dr. Aylward taught my daughter Anna this year at St Josephs College. She loved him from the very first meeting. She said he worked so hard in so many ways to help the students understand the material. Each time when Anna saw him she hugged him. He will always serve as an inspiration to Anna and our family sends prayers and our deepest condolences to Steven's family.

Nancy Bovill Lupien

October 12, 2011

Steve was a very important and wonderful friend during our teen years. Steve was kind and caring. He will be missed by many because he loved and was loved by many. God Bless his family. My thoughts and prayers are with you

October 11, 2011

Steve taught for my Business Dept at SMCC for a number of semesters. He was a pleasure to have teaching for us: very dedicated, detailed and loved teaching. For whatever good it did, I was honored to write a recommendation for Steve for St. Joseph's College. I'm so sorry that Steve is gone, we lost a wonderful person to this world. But, as every teacher, parent and caring person knows, what you do for others lives on and on, and that will certainly be the case with Steve. My deepest sympathies to Steve's family, friends and his many students. Steve Strand

Denise Beckwith

October 11, 2011

As one of Steve's neighbors, it was always nice to see him jog by- or walk his dog. When the trail work was being done, his little notes regarding when the next neighborhood cleanup would be, always personalized with his signature and a message- it was always nice to receive. Steve was calm, kind and caring. He will be fondly remembered and greatly missed.

Donna Ricker

October 10, 2011

Dear Helen & Children -
My heartfelt sympathies on the loss of this most incredible of men. My thoughts & prayers are with you all. Thank you for allowing me to know Steve.

angela albert

October 10, 2011

to all the family-we have not met--I work with patty and wanted to offer my prayers and thoughts to all of you during this difficult time.

Tom D'Alfonso

October 9, 2011

so accomplished and so young, we didn't know one another well but I was happy to have known Stephen

October 9, 2011

Helen, please accept my deepest sympathies to you and your family for your loss.

Chuck Fagone

October 9, 2011

Sorry to hear of your loss. I also knew Steve casually through his work on the Riverton trail. His dedication to his community, country and students is evident. He has touched many lives.

Jim Duran

October 9, 2011

"As a neighbor who would see Steve running along Harris and Newton Streets, and along the railside trails of Riverton, I always appreciated his ready smile and friendly hello. Although I knew him only casually, I was very impressed with his love for people and nature around us.
He seemed like such a gentleman and a patriot... man who thought of others before himself."

Kenney Family

October 9, 2011

Our neighborhood will miss your friendly smiles and waves. Prayers are with the Aylward family, my God guide you through these difficult days.

Candace Laliberte

October 9, 2011

We are so deeply sorry for such a great loss. Professor Aylward came to visit us one year ago when my brother, his student was in the ICU. When Michael passed, Professor Aylward wrote letters, made phone calls, and shared intimate details of his close relationship with Michael. He truly brought us comfort in our time of deep sadness and loss. Sending love, prayer, and condolences to Professor Aylward's family. He was truly a wonderful man, and he will be deeply missed.

Denise Harlow

October 9, 2011

Steve was a special person with many talents. He was a great person who will be deeply missed.

Albert (Sonny) & Alta Aceto

October 9, 2011

Helen, our sincere sympathy. Albert (Sonny) & Alta (Minervino) Aceto

Brad Goulet

October 9, 2011

One Incredible Man, Dr. Stephen R Aylward

On 10/7/2011 @ 4:23PM Dr. Stephan Aylward, Professor, mentor, friend, husband and father died in a tragic car accident. In condolence, heartfelt pain, and warm wishes for peace I share this story of the incredible man and teacher he was.

Just a year ago this week we prayed with all our hearts at my son Michael’s bedside. He had suffered a seizure on October 6, 2010 while driving on White’s Bridge Road and was in a coma on life support at Maine Medical Center. We were reached out to by an incredible man offering his prayers, hope, and sharing pieces of the life he had shared with Michael as his professor and friend. Michael had always spoken fondly of Dr. Alyward as a Professor; he too busy to talk, to help when a problem arose, a class problem or a personal problem.

Michael went to Saint Josephs as a young man working hard in school attempting to both fit in and have a normal college career despite lingering issues from the Brain Injury he suffered at age 13. Michael had a passion for History and in Dr. Aylward he found both an intelligent caring professor and a warm and caring man always with time to sit and chat with Mike both about class, work, and life. Though Mike shared a lot we couldn’t have known how close a bond he and Dr. Alyward shared.

This we learned over days while we sat our vigil at Michael’s bedside. Dr. Alyward visited the hospital numerous times offering support to each of us including a monks sweatshirt, and even stuffed animals for Michael’s nephews Luke and Richie. He shared stories of personal moments of his relationship with Michael as Mike struggled with Class or fitting in.

Our vigil ended 10/14/2010 when Michael passed into the Lord’s arms. We were devastated, distraught, and feeling a pain no parent, grandparent, sister, or nephew should experience. The grief was all encompassing. Dr. Aylward continued his support. He wrote letters about his experiences with Mike, sharing his grief at the loss of a friend and student, and giving us guidance as the seeds of an idea for a foundation as a legacy to Mike began to sprout. He offered prayer, hope and genuine compassion. I was a little numb from the shock to realize just how extraordinary he was. I also learned more about the relationship between this professor and my son as they connected on intellectual passions or just shared his experiences, something Michael truly cherished. Michael shared Dr. Aylward the story of his brain injury and his recovery; he shared his deficits, his struggles with memory, seizure activity, and cognitive difficulty. These were things Michael was loathed to share with anyone. Dr. Aylward encouraged Michael, he convinced him the accommodations he was entitled to were not something to be ashamed of, but a means to complete his education and go on to graduate school to become a counselor helping people navigate similar difficult experiences. Dr. Aylward’s encouragement and friendship was a big part of why Michael so loved his experience at St. Josephs.

Dr. Alyward was there by our side as we laid Michael to rest. He continued to keep touch with our family through letters and emails offering warmth, hope, and wishes for peace as we began this new journey without Michael. I personally wish I had taken the time to express to him how much I appreciated his presence, warm heart, care and concern, far beyond the role he played as a college professor.

As I sit here today tears in my eyes and feeling the loss in my heart; I cry those tears both for myself and for the whole Aylward family as they experience this tremendous loss. I offer all my prayers for their peace, comfort, and in their memories as they navigate life with this loss, and hope that in some way I can help and be a small part of what becomes warm thoughts as they remember how blessed they were to have him in their life. How proud they will feel having the blessings of a life shared with this incredible man.

As we say goodbye, I hope and pray that Michael was there to welcome Steve to his just reward. An incredible man, epitomizing the meaning of teacher, mentor, friend, and compassionate human being.

God bless you Mr. Aylward and may the bounty of all that is promise be realized as you’ve earned you place.

With Love for You, Compassion, shared grief, and hope for peace, for your family.

Bradley J Goulet (Michael T Goulet’s Dad), my whole family and the Michael T Goulet TBI and Epilepsy Foundation

Patty Joyce

October 9, 2011

Steve, Thank you for the ways you have touched the lives of many in the world, the U.S.A. , Maine, Portland, St. Joseph's Collage, your neighborhood, your friends, and your family. Thank you especially for being a gentle, honorable, wise, compassionate man. I love you. Nanny Patty

Ken Brann

October 9, 2011

Dick, I am so sorry for your loss, such a brilliant young man and for all his students, a loss for them also.

Ken Brann

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