Bessie Jean Ryan

Bessie Jean had many names during her 94 years. Her youngest son, Tom, and all his friends referred to her as Mean Jean! But Tom, Tommy to his three siblings, says that Mom taught us compassion.
Mom, like her father, Tom Robinson, was direct and fiery. She spoke her mind, and her three husbands, Arthur Ryan, with whom she had four children (Jim, Nancy, Colleen, and Tom), Paul Moxon, and Bob Wakerell, were never very successful at reining her in. But, as in the case of most marriages, Art, Mom's first husband, and our father, controlled the household in that silent, taciturn way of many Irish men. Mom, with all her wisdom and intelligence, never learned to understand him.
But as Dad was a mystery to Jean and to his children, we spent endless dinnertimes as adults trying to piece together a picture of him, Jean was not. We knew what she thought, what she was thinking about, the mysteries that troubled her, and the joys and sorrows that she lived with all her life.
Mom shared that with us, whether in the Ford Zephur driving around Europe, at the cottage on the Upper Rideau, or in the house on Lake Avenue. We grew up knowing that we were loved, tenderly and fiercely, cared for, given all her very intelligent attention.
One of my favourite memories of Mom, is her falling asleep on the couch in the backroom holding on to the newspaper after spending a long evening ironing our clothes.
Mom moved into the Waterside eleven years ago. She said to me at the time, "I feel that I still have a lot to give." And so, she did, ruffling feathers, making friends, speaking the truth, and continuing to love and care for children and great and grandchildren. And greatgrandchildren she has, Kyler, Jamieson and Anthony. And grandchildren: Chelsea, Caitie and Emily, Jason, Sean, Mich, and Aisling, Hugh, and Emma. Count them, that's nine young people that Mom took delight in loving and sharing her experience of life with. Mom continued to share in their joys and sorrows until the very end of her life.
And that is the occasion of this obituary, Mom's death. As her grandchildren know, Mom was a Grand Lady (she never thought of herself as a Lady) but that is what she was, teaching us all what it means to be a lady, how a lady should be treated and respected and loved. Even her daughters and sons-in-law, Sally, Heather, Len, and Dean, learned that they too fell under Mom's loving care.
It is with a deep sadness that we declare to the world that Bessie Jean has died, but that we state, that we, with an enduring hope and faith, believe that because of her love and care for us, the world will continue to be in good hands. A family celebration has already taken place.
In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to the Carleton Place Hospital Foundation or a Charity of Your Choice in her memory.
Arrangements have been entrusted to the Alan R. Barker Funeral Home in Carleton Place www.barkerfh.com