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Barry Gauthier Obituary
Memories and Condolences
for Barry Gauthier
24 Entries
Susan and David Davidson
March 15, 2006
To Barry's family,
Over the years we have enjoyed seeing Barry at occasional family gatherings. As kids (and cousins) David and Barry grew up in Ottawa and enjoyed talking about those days. In the first two attached photos of the family renunion, summer 2004, David is the one in glasses and red shirt. We will all miss Barry and we are sorry for your loss.
David and Sue Davidson
Raymond Gauthier
March 7, 2006
I loved my brother Barry. Now he is gone and a strange emptiness envelops me, perhaps it will until we meet again.This tribute is to his daughter Kelly whom he dearly loved. She left her job to provide loving, dedicated,and faithful care for her father, my brother,in her own home for the last six months of his life. Bravo!
Stephen Gauthier
March 6, 2006
To Barry and Family.
We were sorry to hear of the loss of such a dedicated Father, Grandfather, Uncle, and Brother. Hold on to your memories and they will help ease the pain of your loss.
Stephen, Carolyn, Johnathon and Jacob Gauthier
laura head
March 5, 2006
hello,
pop (barry) was a great grandpa and a great dad he was a loving brother and uncle too he will be dearly missed by all of us but i know that he will always always be looking out for all of us!
Dick Willinger
March 5, 2006
To all the family of Barry;
We were both sorry to hear of Barry's passing. We knew it was a long and courageous struggle. Our prayers and thoughts are with you all.
Dick and Julia Willinger
Debbie Diraddo
March 3, 2006
Dear Kelly and Heather and grandchildren,I am so sorry to hear about your Dad, my thoughts are with you all.
You will meet again.
Debbie
Gail & Rick, Janet & Mike Maguire
March 3, 2006
Dear Kelly & Heather, your Dad loved you very much and he lived for his grand children. We were blessed with a very good brother & Uncle for 70 years. We all have great memories and had loads of laughs with Barry. We will miss you dearly brother, but we will meet again. Love Gail & Rick, Janet & Mike (sister & brother-in-law)
Sandra Fergusson
March 2, 2006
New pictures added to the photo gallery today - please click the link to your right to view them..
As I write - the sun crests the Carolina sky....
Sandra Fergusson
March 2, 2006
The phone rang – and before a word was said on the other end of the line, I knew he was gone….I saw his picture in the obituary and I read the words but it felt distant – as though it was someone else. I couldn’t help but softly touch his face on my computer screen… running my finger tips gently across his cheek…I didn’t want to let go and I didn’t want to have to say good-bye.
I genuinely loved my Uncle Barry and admired him in so many, many ways. Likely without even knowing it, he taught me much about how to “fly right”; to genuinely take an interest in people and be respectful; that “slow and steady” wins the race and that there is no substitute for hard work and no shortcut to true success. He was consistent and persistent in all that he did and he was generous with all the important things that really matter like time and love.
As I sit here watching dawn break across the Carolina sky I can only remember all of the happy times, his hearty belly laugh; the way he used to put one hand on his hip and the other behind his neck and say “Oh Geez”; all the wonderful memories that he gave me by letting us visit his cottage…and most particularly… the almost literal sparkle in his eyes – always at the ready to learn or try something new. He was interested in just about everything - such a character - and so many endearing qualities and quirks. He taught me much about the generation that he grew up in and there was and still is much to be learned about those times. His era was not one of excess – there wasn’t such a thing as “disposable income”. People didn’t have much and what they did have – they worked hard to get and they appreciated and took care of it all the more. As young kids he would always warn us about taking care of our belongings…he’d say “Well.. if you break it… then there’s no more”….or “You lose it… and then you’ll have none”. Didn’t matter if it cost ten bucks or ten cents – everything and every one, deserved the same degree of care and attention. While those were simple words of warning that as kids we’d sometimes secretly mock… you know after hearing them oh… about 2000 times it eventually sinks in.. hey.. you know… he’s right. As I came into adulthood with my own children I find myself saying the very same words verbatim…which makes me laugh almost out loud. Without knowing it … or probably really trying to…he was teaching me about the bigger picture - all things – all people – great and small…have value and should be respected. Now I’M “the person” that has to work to pay for the things… and you know what…EUREKA …“I get it!” – lesson learned.
I wanted to share my infamous “Frisbee Story”... I’m not really sure why it sticks out in my mind so clearly – perhaps it’s because it is my youngest recollection of my life flashing before my eyes…but I think it serves well to illustrate how he seemed to pass on little lessons to me. At Uncle Barry’s cottage we had 1 Frisbee and 1 badminton set… and unlike those found at most cottages… I think those 2 toys passed through 2 generations of kids without incident…that was until I lost the Frisbee at the beach. If the earth could have swallowed me up that day… I think I would have preferred it over having to drag myself up the hill to tell Uncle Barry that it was gone - I was mortified. But my sadness and slight terror in losing the Frisbee wasn’t about the actual toy itself… it was about letting down the person who it belonged to, namely Uncle Barry. He didn’t blow up or yell or scold me – he just simply said “Well… you lost it…and now there’s none – and you know what… there really wasn’t because another didn’t magically appear the next time we went to the cottage. Needless to say I practically bronzed the badminton set and treated it with the utmost care. That was a good thing – lesson learned.
I always wondered why losing that darn Frisbee bothered me so much, and as I got older and looked back on that day I realized that even at that young age I had learned from him that to take care of things was to show a measure of respect – be it for the person it belonged to – or simply for the thing itself - and I guess that day I felt that I had really let him down. I learned that he said what he meant and meant what he said – something I try to consistently do as a parent to this day. Also that it was important to take care of things because if you didn’t then they wouldn’t be there for others to share and enjoy – so basically – don’t be selfish and think only of yourself – your careless actions could affect others. That’s a lot of learnin’ that came from his simple but consistent lament about taking care of the toys… ha ha It may seem like a bit of a silly example… but it serves well to illustrate my point that in a “wax on wax off” - “Karate Kid” kind of way – he instilled some important values in my mind. As a kid I may not have entirely gotten the point of why he did things a certain way or why he was so adamant about certain things…but I did it his way anyway and over time I came to understand that his reasoning was sound and the values resonate with me to this day. He didn’t preach about things, complain about things – or say a sideways word about anyone – he just lived his life as true and honest as he could – and by his example…. I gleaned much.
I’m now in my 40’s – and yet I always called him Uncle Barry… I’m sure that I could have just addressed him informally as another adult may… but somehow I just never thought that it was respectful for me to do that….the same is true with all my Uncles and Aunts. Each so unique - each having shared so much - cared so much and loved me so much. Uncle Barry never commanded respect… he just simply and quietly earned mine and made me want to give it. When I opened my business a few years ago – he sent me an email and among other things – he told me how proud he was of me –when I read that, I felt like a 12 year old...you know...the way you feel when an adult that you look up to tells you that you’re a great kid... you get that beaming smile on your face and you just feel really good inside. That’s the way it made me feel because no matter that I’m 40 and have kids of my own… it still made me feel so happy that he cared to say that and share that…. I was like … wow…my Uncle really likes my work - thank you SO much for noticing – you just made my day!
To me, he led a remarkable life in a very unremarkable way. Never showy or concerned with brands, fads or excess...he took only what he needed, bought only what was necessary and wasted very little – he tred lightly upon this earth and was an environmentalist in almost every respect – long before terms like “tree hugger” or “recycler” were every coined. He appreciated simple pleasures – interesting conversation – travel, different cultures and was passionate about all the things that truly matter… his kids, his grandchildren… just living life fully and deeply...like you really mean it. Always at the ready for a new adventure – it would blow my mind to be chatting with him and have him say in passing that he was back from Turkey and thinking of going to China – or that he just went sea kayaking or tried mountain hiking...my God... I am almost half his age and he had more just plain “get up and go” than just about anyone I know. If he wanted to do it or try it.. he did...period – he would have made a great Nike spokesman. I LOVED that about him! He waited for no one...if he was going somewhere, you were welcome to come – he’d love your company… but he wasn’t going to wait for you – you needed to meet him on time and be ready. Lesson learned there... time is valuable – it waits for no one.
I feel blessed for having had him be a part of my life for so long. He was important to me - I loved him and am so grateful for all that he shared with me through the years. I was not shy with my gratitude and told him many times how thankful I was for all that I felt he meant to me – again... lesson learned...leave no kind word unspoken.
With his passing there is such a sadness...but at the same time...strangely...such a fullness...so many great memories...great lessons...great experiences...such fondness and affection was there.
The sun is just cresting the trees now – and I feel as I always have… that I carry part of him with me no matter what... it may be in something that I’m trying to teach my kids – it may be because I always try to listen and learn something from a stranger I may meet during my day – it may be when I’m shopping and I choose the utility of an object over the beauty and brand of it. His most precious commodity – as is all of ours – is time...it costs nothing but is so valuable. Uncle Barry always had or made it for his kids, grandkids and even for me. That’s something that I’ll always remember – because it’s important – it makes kids feel important, loved and appreciated. That’s how he always made me feel...and for that I am a better person. That’s powerful to have been able to have made such an impact and difference in someone’s life. I’m honored and proud to have had the privilege of knowing him – he was a true gentleman and a really good and genuine human being. It comforts me to know that his spirit and my memories of our times spent together will journey with me for all of my days.
Seattle Trip - summer 2003
March 1, 2006
Watching "Flying Fish" at Pike Market in Seattle 2003
March 1, 2006
Pike Place Market (Seattle) - Barry & Sharron 2003
March 1, 2006
Quacking it up on tour in Seattle - 2003
March 1, 2006
Seattle Space needle - summer 2003
March 1, 2006
Family reunion summer 2004
March 1, 2006
Family reunion summer 2004
March 1, 2006
Brian O'Connell
March 1, 2006
Kelly,Heather,Ray,Bob,Betty,
Gail,Sharon:
It's difficult to find the words that say just what we feel; Yet I hope that somehow this message will reveal how much our thoughts are with you as you face the days ahead, and love will be the echo of the words we have left unsaid.
Brian and Linda O'Connell (cousin)
Debbie Ensing(Gauthier)
February 22, 2006
Kelly and Heather: We were sorry to hear of Barry. Our thoughts are with you. Barry will be in my heart always, as my uncle and friend he will truly be missed. Love always Barry - Debbie, Paul, Melissa and Sydney
Rick Guenette
February 20, 2006
To all that knew Barry, God blessed us all with his presence. I have been honoured to know him.
Elizabeth (Betty) Pederson (Gauthier)
February 20, 2006
Dear Kelly, Mike, Jeff & Laura; Heather & Christoper: I would like you all to know how I feel about my brother Barry - he has been an excellent brother and friend to me throughout my life, he has always been honest, responsible, hardworking and loyal. Through the years Barry was such a loving son to my Mother and helped her and me and my sisters through some very tough times when we were young and I never forgot that. Thank you Kelly for keeping your door open so that we could all go to your house in Victoria and spend valuable time with Barry sharing our thoughts and memories of times back in the day. Barry was a good Dad to you and Heather and an oh so wonderful grandfather(pop) to his grandchildren. As you all know Barry never ceased to be a student of life and was always so happy to share his travels (and they were far and wide) and life experiences with everone. Kelly, you will remember this - that on one of my visits to your place, you, Barry and I went on the deck to have a hot tub, I can't believe how much laughter and fun we all had that night. As we were laughing, joking around and acting silly, a white bird feather came fluttering down into the tub, and Barry looked up at the sky and said "that must be Ma shaking her feathers at us and thinking - look at those fools down there" and we all laughed some more. Well now when we see a couple of white feathers floating down we can say, that must be Ma and Barry. Peace to all of us. Love Betty Pederson (Gauthier), White Rock, B.C.
DAVID MCKAY
February 20, 2006
We're sorry to learn of your family's loss of Barry. As neighbours of yours at Norway Bay, the cottage that was yours will always be "Barrys".He was always a great gentleman, and i'm sure you'll miss him dearly.
David McKay, on behalf of the Mckay family, of Norway Bay,Quebec
Sharron Wilson
February 19, 2006
Dear Kelly, Micheal, Jeffery, Laura
The obituary in the Ottawa Citizen is the best..thank you. I am so glad that you sent a picture. It's the best. Thank you for that. Please be in peace knowing that your dad, my brother will be in heaven as we speak. My mom, will be there to greet him. I am sure of that. I know that we are all going to heaven, it's just a matter of breath...and we will be there..I want to thank you for advertising Barry's death in Ottawa, as I am sure that many people that knew him will respond to your guestbook.
Take care...I love you
ian oconnell
February 19, 2006
I haven't seen Barry in many years, but I do remember his kindness to me as a youngster going through difficult times. I'm sorry to hear of his passing. I and my wife Irene extend our heartfelt condolences to all of his family. We know he will be sadly missed.
Ian and Irene O'Connell (cousin)
Rebecca Heron
February 19, 2006
Kelly and Heather. On behalf of my mother (Mabel Heron) and myself, please accept our sincere condolences to you both and your families on the recent passing of your dad. We had fond memories of him during his time in Ottawa and I know he will be sadly missed.
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