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Nelson P. Kearney Sr.

Nelson P. Kearney Sr.

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July 16, 2018
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July 16, 2018
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December 15, 2016
Hello Dad,

Today is the tenth anniversary of your passing. I was doing ok. I swear I was. But no matter how hard I try, the pain of your death still won't release me. I've been told to release it. But that's easier said than done. Those who don't know our history may not understand why this is so painful for me and why I still can't release it. I pray for help with this. I've tried to put the pain away and accept life in the wake of your death. I have a beautiful, great and loving wife who is always there for me and protects my heart, but I can't burden her with this. She stresses when I'm hurt. I may never have the closure that I need. I need more than the memories. I need my Dad.
December 15, 2014
THAT DAY

This is the year that I thought that maybe I
Would face That Day and my eyes would stay dry
It was just this past evening, wait, that was eight years ago
On one heartbreaking night when I receive that phone call

A voice said get down here quick, your dad's in despair
If you waste any time, he may no longer be here
I flew out of my office and jumped in my ride
200 miles an hour as I laughed and I cried

Ha, ha, I told myself that man does funny things
How could I take this serious when he's always joking
Yeah, it's a prank, but a cruel one, I sighed
No way I'm going to lose him right around Christmas time

Greeted by a lieutenant who didn't know how I would take it
He said I'm sorry captain sir, your dad, he didn't make it
Nah, this can't be real, come on dad open up your eyes
I know I've seen many things try to take away your life

As I walked closer to him, I felt a chill in the air
But hospitals keep their heat low, no need to despair
Reality soon would hit me, as I saw him lying there
His body was sure enough in the room, but I couldn't feel him here

The floor came up and struck my knees
My lungs slammed shut and they couldn't breathe
I just spoke to him, no way this can be
How could he leave and not wait for me?

Dad, I need to see you just one more time
There's too many regrets that you've left behind
Why won't you answer me, my heart's in a bind
God, please pick up the remote control and press rewind

God please talk to dad, he keeps ignoring me
Is there something I did wrong to him before he ceased to breathe?
God you know he's stubborn, he insists on his own way
But Lord this hurts so bad, bring him back, I prayed

No answer for the prayer I cried
I'll have to accept That Day and stop asking why
The Lord knew best to rest his eyes
God's "Count" is one more warrior up high

My December calendar is missing the 15th now
Dad took it with him when he went beyond the clouds
That number is bittersweet, it started with my mother
She gave me life on one "15" and dad died on another

Niagara on my face while I write these thoughts
Imprisoned in pain like a soldier who's been caught
I'm still living in that trauma room eight years to the day
Staff walks by me here but they don't charge me to stay

I know I must move, I can't live here anymore
But turning a door knob can't open a wall
I must heal this broken heart, maybe I will this time
Or next year the word in the first verse goes from eight to nine

By Bryan D. Kearney, © 2014
December 15, 2013
Hello Dad,

It has been seven long years since you left me. It still hurts the same way it did the day you passed. I can't heal. I feel horrible. This is so painful that I can't adequately put it into words. Life is supposed to go on, but why do I feel so lifeless at times? I have tried and tried and tried to heal but nothing works. I'm writing this with such a heavy heart that I can't get up, eat or drink. How will this end for me? Healing? Acceptance? Or will I carry this pain to my own grave? I always have the words to say to everyone else, yet I can't seem to comfort myself. It doesn't get any less painful. It just never does. I love you Dad. See you on the other side.
November 18, 2007
Hello Dad,

On Sunday, November 11, 2007, my Pittsburgh Steelers played your Cleveland Browns in Pittsburgh. That was the game we were supposed to attend where the loser had to wear the winner's jersey. I had tickets to that game but I just couldn't go without you. I said that I would wear a Cleveland Browns jersey during that game in your honor. I was able to find one just one day before the game. I wore your team's jersey over mine throughout the game. I signed the jersey, wrote the score on it and placed it on your grave site. Even though my team won, I hope you enjoyed the game. It brought up thoughts of you, times we shared and times we were to share. The tears I continue to shed from the intense pain of losing you can't be stopped. But this game and the remembrance of you through it gave me some temporary relief. I love you, Dad. See you on the other side.
January 18, 2007
To Donna Kearny-Foster, Nelson Jr., Brian, and Aaron,
I am so sorry to here about the lost of your father. I have been where you are now and it is not a happy place to be. Just remember to charish those special memories that you have of him and you can always keep him close to you. Take care and remember I will alway be thinking about you. Your friend and neighbor from the past.
January 11, 2007
Verna and Family, please know that my sympathy and love is with you. The Count is now with his King. May the peace and love of God be with you always!
December 26, 2006
Vernie & Children

We are still shock and mournful in the loss of the "Count." He was a wonderful friend to my husband over the years and a newly found friend to me. The times spent with the "Scholars" in 2004 will always be treasured. The funeral services was beautiful. We are praying for your speedy recovery. Thanks so much for everything.

(Will send you and the children Count's booklets in a few weeks.)
December 26, 2006
My sympathy goes out to you and your family
December 26, 2006
Please accept my sympathy during this difficult time !!! May God bless you and your family Tiffany !! God bless !!!!

Love,
Maribel
December 25, 2006
To Counts Family,Friends,Col Charles Young Post140
Count has more meaning in my life as a father figure and family friend as he grew up with my sisters all of Harding high in the day. His Job of Bridgeports finest made me belive i had a chance other than Bpt Brass,C steel he made a difference to all of us and his high morales that he tought me and others are displayed in my childred today. I wish my kids could have met my friend,hero,my Martin Luther King Jr you will be forever with us Count.

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