Ellen Litman

Ellen Litman, 80, passed away peacefully of Alzheimer's on the evening of March 30th, 2026, at Coming Home Hospice in San Francisco, surrounded by the love of her family and friends.

Ellen is survived by her beloved wife, Nan O'Connor; her children, Jodi (Katie) Steve (Amy); her nieces, Lynnie (Michael) and Leilani (Nature); her grandchildren, Maddie (Christian), Hannah (Sam), and Wyatt; and her great-grandson, Ezekiel. She is also survived by Robert Litman, her co-parent.

Ellen dedicated herself to social work and social justice, serving the communities of Tucson, AZ, and Alameda, Daly City, and San Francisco, CA, offering guidance, compassion, and unwavering support to adults, teens and children alike. The ripples of her work extended far beyond the individuals she touched, strengthening every community, of which she was a part.

A true pioneer, Ellen lived boldly and authentically at a time when doing so required courage. She was a force within the LGBTQ+ community in Tucson, San Francisco, and beyond—helping to carve out space, visibility, and acceptance where it did not yet fully exist. She built community not just through advocacy, but through connection, joy, and unapologetic presence. Ellen didn't just witness change—she helped create it, leaving behind a legacy of pride, resilience, and belonging that will continue to inspire for generations.

Ellen's heart was always the biggest in any room. She cherished and nurtured her decades-long friendships, and her exuberant love of life infused everyone around her. She was always ready for a travel adventure, loved to dance, and had an infectious sense of humor. She will be missed by every person who was lucky enough to know her.

Ellen shared a remarkable 37-year partnership with her heart's companion, Nan, a bond rooted in deep devotion, unwavering loyalty, and unconditional love. Theirs was a rare and enduring love story.

Being a grandmother to Maddie, Hannah, and Wyatt brought her special meaning and great joy. She was thrilled to become a great-grandmother to Ezekiel last year and treasured visits with him. Beyond her family, her work, and her friends, Ellen's heart also belonged to dogs and gardening. Her love for "a woman's best friend" was nothing short of an obsession—unapologetic and wholehearted. She found peace and pride in creating and caring for her backyard garden.


In so many ways, Ellen made the world more beautiful—and more brave.

The family would like to extend their deepest gratitude to Coming Home Hospice for the extraordinary care, compassion, and dignity they provided to Ellen. In honor of that care and in lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Coming Home Hospice. Contributions may also be made to Cape Cod Alzheimer's Family Support Center or Muttville.