The best eulogies are more than mere words. They are an homage, a celebration of who someone was in life, and a way to honor the impact they had on you and others.
But first, what is a eulogy, and how does it differ from an obituary or elegy?
The distinction lies in how they are delivered and why.
A eulogy is a speech delivered out loud at a memorial service. An elegy, on the other hand, is an artistic expression of grief and loss, often in song or poetry. Finally, an obituary is a factual written account that includes a concise biography and information about the departed, intended for print.
When you attend a funeral service and someone speaks about the deceased, that is a eulogy.
Most funerals include at least one such speech, if not more, often delivered by someone who knew the deceased well, be it a close family member, friend, or colleague. A eulogy may also be delivered by a clergy member, allowing loved ones an opportunity to grieve without the pressure of speaking before a crowd.
The best eulogies are more than mere words. They are an homage, a celebration of who someone was in life, and a way to honor the impact they had on you and others.
But first, what is a eulogy, and how does it differ from an obituary or elegy?
The distinction lies in how they are delivered and why.
A eulogy is a speech delivered out loud at a memorial service. An elegy, on the other hand, is an artistic expression of grief and loss, often in song or poetry. Finally, an obituary is a factual written account that includes a concise biography and information about the departed, intended for print.
When you attend a funeral service and someone speaks about the deceased, that is a eulogy.
Most funerals include at least one such speech, if not more, often delivered by someone who knew the deceased well, be it a close family member, friend, or colleague. A eulogy may also be delivered by a clergy member, allowing loved ones an opportunity to grieve without the pressure of speaking before a crowd.
The best eulogies are more than mere words. They are an homage, a celebration of who someone was in life, and a way to honor the impact they had on you and others.
But first, what is a eulogy, and how does it differ from an obituary or elegy?
The distinction lies in how they are delivered and why.
A eulogy is a speech delivered out loud at a memorial service. An elegy, on the other hand, is an artistic expression of grief and loss, often in song or poetry. Finally, an obituary is a factual written account that includes a concise biography and information about the departed, intended for print.
When you attend a funeral service and someone speaks about the deceased, that is a eulogy.
Most funerals include at least one such speech, if not more, often delivered by someone who knew the deceased well, be it a close family member, friend, or colleague. A eulogy may also be delivered by a clergy member, allowing loved ones an opportunity to grieve without the pressure of speaking before a crowd.
Ready to get started?
Ready to get started?
Ready to get started?
Our ObitWriter® can help you create an obituary in minutes.
Our ObitWriter® can help you create an obituary in minutes.
Our ObitWriter® can help you create an obituary in minutes.
Who Typically Writes a Eulogy?
The eulogy is typically written by the person who is going to deliver it. However, this need not be the case. If a member of clergy will deliver the address, for example, family members may collaborate with them to provide information and stories they can use when crafting their speech. In some cases, they may even write it themselves. These arrangements may differ from service-to-service, depending on the preferences of the deceased’s family and the person who will perform the eulogy. If you’ve been asked to deliver one and need to know how to write a eulogy, begin by taking some time to reflect on the person’s life. Think about their values, passions, achievements, and the memories you shared. Consider including anecdotes that capture their spirit, lessons you learned from them, and the legacy they leave behind.
If needed, reach out to friends and family for guidance on where to begin. Their insights can help paint a fuller picture and may offer perspectives that add depth to your tribute.
Creating an outline can be a good way to organize your thoughts. You may wish to start with an introduction, followed by a biographical segment and personal stories, then end with a farewell.
It's important to strike the right balance. Be honest but also respectful, celebrating the individual’s life with anecdotes that are appropriate for all attendees.
What to Include in a Eulogy
Crafting a eulogy involves capturing the spirit of the departed and what they meant to you and/or others — what set them apart, the impact they had on those around them, and the memories you carry of them.
This could mean sharing personal stories that spotlight their personality, interests, or major life moments. It could include discussing their passions and hobbies, or sharing some of their cherished sayings or signature jokes. A eulogy could be distinctly personal to the speaker, or it could aim to be broader in nature, speaking more collectively about the departed’s place in the world.
In other words, there is no one way to craft a eulogy. They can be as varied as the people they seek to recognize. The most important thing is that it honors the person in a way they reflects who they were.
With that said, there are some best practices to keep in mind, and there are many examples of eulogies you can learn from. Trying reading some of these excellent eulogies for inspiration.
First, aim to start strong. Your opening is important to drawing people into the moment. Begin by offering a brief introduction of your relationship with the deceased.
From there, you might share specific stories or experiences that illustrate their character.
Finally, try to end on a hopeful note. This could be a reflection on the departed’s influence on others, a comment on what they would have wanted for their loved ones, or a direct farewell.
When writing your speech, avoid airing grievances and family issues. A memorial service is not the forum for them.
Also, while a good eulogy can include an honest appraisal of the departed’s ups and downs, when you discuss the downs, do so with purpose. For example, if their last years were spent suffering with an illness, mention this only to celebrate their strength in the face of difficult times. If they experienced family “drama,” use that as a means to talk about how they grew from those experiences.
It can be difficult, but finding a positive note to emphasize from a negative situation will allow everyone to go home feeling better about their own lives.
Finally, you might think that humor is something to be avoided at a solemn occasion, but in fact, humorous eulogies are common. While it’s important to remember that the goal is not to entertain, it’s perfectly acceptable to include funny memories and stories. A successful eulogy is about capturing the essence of a person, and for most of us, that may include humor. Solemnity is customary, but there is room for levity, if woven in respectfully.
After all, humor can be healing when in the midst of grief.
Types of Eulogies
As mentioned, there are many types of eulogies. These memorial speeches can come in all forms and have a wide variety of tones. Which you choose is dependent on what the deceased was like in life and who will be attending the service.
Common types of eulogies include:
Biographical – This takes the audience on a journey through the life of the deceased. It's a detailed tribute that offers an overview of their life, career, accomplishments, and the legacy they leave behind.
Personal Reflection – Unlike the broader scope of a biographical eulogy, a personal reflection focuses on the speaker's relationship with the deceased. It highlights personal stories, shared moments, and the qualities that made the individual special to the speaker. This offers a more intimate portrayal of who they were.
Thematic – Often delivered by clergy, this centers around a specific theme or aspect of the person's life that was particularly significant, or aims to impart a life lesson. It could focus on their passions and illustrate how those pursuits shaped their life and impacted others, or be tied to a favorite Bible verse or philosophy.
Tribute – Consider this akin to a loving toast that praises the deceased’s virtues, successes, and how they inspired others. This type of eulogy often includes anecdotes that exemplify the person's best qualities, similar to a wedding toast, but framed as a loving goodbye.
Humorous – As noted above, in some cases a humorous eulogy may be appropriate, especially if the deceased was known for their lighthearted approach to life. Note that it's crucial to gauge the audience and the context to ensure this type of tribute is fitting.
Related Content: Find Inspiration in our Obituary Template for Mothers, Fathers and More
How to Deliver a Eulogy at a Funeral
If you are delivering a eulogy, it’s important to practice beforehand, especially if you don’t usually do public speaking. Familiarize yourself with the material to the point where you can deliver it with minimal reliance on your notes. Practicing will also help you manage your nerves and to speak in a more natural way.
It’s typical for nervous speakers to rush ahead, speaking quickly in order to get through the task. If you sense yourself doing this, slow down and try to speak slowly. This ensures that attendees can absorb what you’re saying and allows time for the weight of your words to resonate with them.
Also remember that you are there to connect with those listening, so try to look up from your notes occasionally. You don’t need to make eye contact with the audience – for some speakers, this may worsen their nerves – but at least appear as if you are. An easy trick is to look above the audience at the back wall of the room.
Remember that it’s okay to speak conversationally. A eulogy should feel personal, after all. Some eulogies are delivered as if speaking directly to the person being honored. This can be effective, though keep in mind that this may overwhelm some speakers with emotion.
That said, it’s okay to show emotion. If you need to take a moment to compose yourself, do so. Remember, it's a difficult task. Those present will understand.
Finally, at the end of the eulogy, pause. This gives people a moment to reflect on your words and provides a natural conclusion to your speech.
Delivering a eulogy that will honor the deceased and bring peace to those attending the memorial service may seem like a daunting task, but with a focus on honoring the person you lost, you’ll do fine.
Who Typically Writes a Eulogy?
The eulogy is typically written by the person who is going to deliver it. However, this need not be the case. If a member of clergy will deliver the address, for example, family members may collaborate with them to provide information and stories they can use when crafting their speech. In some cases, they may even write it themselves. These arrangements may differ from service-to-service, depending on the preferences of the deceased’s family and the person who will perform the eulogy. If you’ve been asked to deliver one and need to know how to write a eulogy, begin by taking some time to reflect on the person’s life. Think about their values, passions, achievements, and the memories you shared. Consider including anecdotes that capture their spirit, lessons you learned from them, and the legacy they leave behind.
If needed, reach out to friends and family for guidance on where to begin. Their insights can help paint a fuller picture and may offer perspectives that add depth to your tribute.
Creating an outline can be a good way to organize your thoughts. You may wish to start with an introduction, followed by a biographical segment and personal stories, then end with a farewell.
It's important to strike the right balance. Be honest but also respectful, celebrating the individual’s life with anecdotes that are appropriate for all attendees.
What to Include in a Eulogy
Crafting a eulogy involves capturing the spirit of the departed and what they meant to you and/or others — what set them apart, the impact they had on those around them, and the memories you carry of them.
This could mean sharing personal stories that spotlight their personality, interests, or major life moments. It could include discussing their passions and hobbies, or sharing some of their cherished sayings or signature jokes. A eulogy could be distinctly personal to the speaker, or it could aim to be broader in nature, speaking more collectively about the departed’s place in the world.
In other words, there is no one way to craft a eulogy. They can be as varied as the people they seek to recognize. The most important thing is that it honors the person in a way they reflects who they were.
With that said, there are some best practices to keep in mind, and there are many examples of eulogies you can learn from. Trying reading some of these excellent eulogies for inspiration.
First, aim to start strong. Your opening is important to drawing people into the moment. Begin by offering a brief introduction of your relationship with the deceased.
From there, you might share specific stories or experiences that illustrate their character.
Finally, try to end on a hopeful note. This could be a reflection on the departed’s influence on others, a comment on what they would have wanted for their loved ones, or a direct farewell.
When writing your speech, avoid airing grievances and family issues. A memorial service is not the forum for them.
Also, while a good eulogy can include an honest appraisal of the departed’s ups and downs, when you discuss the downs, do so with purpose. For example, if their last years were spent suffering with an illness, mention this only to celebrate their strength in the face of difficult times. If they experienced family “drama,” use that as a means to talk about how they grew from those experiences.
It can be difficult, but finding a positive note to emphasize from a negative situation will allow everyone to go home feeling better about their own lives.
Finally, you might think that humor is something to be avoided at a solemn occasion, but in fact, humorous eulogies are common. While it’s important to remember that the goal is not to entertain, it’s perfectly acceptable to include funny memories and stories. A successful eulogy is about capturing the essence of a person, and for most of us, that may include humor. Solemnity is customary, but there is room for levity, if woven in respectfully.
After all, humor can be healing when in the midst of grief.
Types of Eulogies
As mentioned, there are many types of eulogies. These memorial speeches can come in all forms and have a wide variety of tones. Which you choose is dependent on what the deceased was like in life and who will be attending the service.
Common types of eulogies include:
Biographical – This takes the audience on a journey through the life of the deceased. It's a detailed tribute that offers an overview of their life, career, accomplishments, and the legacy they leave behind.
Personal Reflection – Unlike the broader scope of a biographical eulogy, a personal reflection focuses on the speaker's relationship with the deceased. It highlights personal stories, shared moments, and the qualities that made the individual special to the speaker. This offers a more intimate portrayal of who they were.
Thematic – Often delivered by clergy, this centers around a specific theme or aspect of the person's life that was particularly significant, or aims to impart a life lesson. It could focus on their passions and illustrate how those pursuits shaped their life and impacted others, or be tied to a favorite Bible verse or philosophy.
Tribute – Consider this akin to a loving toast that praises the deceased’s virtues, successes, and how they inspired others. This type of eulogy often includes anecdotes that exemplify the person's best qualities, similar to a wedding toast, but framed as a loving goodbye.
Humorous – As noted above, in some cases a humorous eulogy may be appropriate, especially if the deceased was known for their lighthearted approach to life. Note that it's crucial to gauge the audience and the context to ensure this type of tribute is fitting.
Related Content: Find Inspiration in our Obituary Template for Mothers, Fathers and More
How to Deliver a Eulogy at a Funeral
If you are delivering a eulogy, it’s important to practice beforehand, especially if you don’t usually do public speaking. Familiarize yourself with the material to the point where you can deliver it with minimal reliance on your notes. Practicing will also help you manage your nerves and to speak in a more natural way.
It’s typical for nervous speakers to rush ahead, speaking quickly in order to get through the task. If you sense yourself doing this, slow down and try to speak slowly. This ensures that attendees can absorb what you’re saying and allows time for the weight of your words to resonate with them.
Also remember that you are there to connect with those listening, so try to look up from your notes occasionally. You don’t need to make eye contact with the audience – for some speakers, this may worsen their nerves – but at least appear as if you are. An easy trick is to look above the audience at the back wall of the room.
Remember that it’s okay to speak conversationally. A eulogy should feel personal, after all. Some eulogies are delivered as if speaking directly to the person being honored. This can be effective, though keep in mind that this may overwhelm some speakers with emotion.
That said, it’s okay to show emotion. If you need to take a moment to compose yourself, do so. Remember, it's a difficult task. Those present will understand.
Finally, at the end of the eulogy, pause. This gives people a moment to reflect on your words and provides a natural conclusion to your speech.
Delivering a eulogy that will honor the deceased and bring peace to those attending the memorial service may seem like a daunting task, but with a focus on honoring the person you lost, you’ll do fine.
Who Typically Writes a Eulogy?
The eulogy is typically written by the person who is going to deliver it. However, this need not be the case. If a member of clergy will deliver the address, for example, family members may collaborate with them to provide information and stories they can use when crafting their speech. In some cases, they may even write it themselves. These arrangements may differ from service-to-service, depending on the preferences of the deceased’s family and the person who will perform the eulogy. If you’ve been asked to deliver one and need to know how to write a eulogy, begin by taking some time to reflect on the person’s life. Think about their values, passions, achievements, and the memories you shared. Consider including anecdotes that capture their spirit, lessons you learned from them, and the legacy they leave behind.
If needed, reach out to friends and family for guidance on where to begin. Their insights can help paint a fuller picture and may offer perspectives that add depth to your tribute.
Creating an outline can be a good way to organize your thoughts. You may wish to start with an introduction, followed by a biographical segment and personal stories, then end with a farewell.
It's important to strike the right balance. Be honest but also respectful, celebrating the individual’s life with anecdotes that are appropriate for all attendees.
What to Include in a Eulogy
Crafting a eulogy involves capturing the spirit of the departed and what they meant to you and/or others — what set them apart, the impact they had on those around them, and the memories you carry of them.
This could mean sharing personal stories that spotlight their personality, interests, or major life moments. It could include discussing their passions and hobbies, or sharing some of their cherished sayings or signature jokes. A eulogy could be distinctly personal to the speaker, or it could aim to be broader in nature, speaking more collectively about the departed’s place in the world.
In other words, there is no one way to craft a eulogy. They can be as varied as the people they seek to recognize. The most important thing is that it honors the person in a way they reflects who they were.
With that said, there are some best practices to keep in mind, and there are many examples of eulogies you can learn from. Trying reading some of these excellent eulogies for inspiration.
First, aim to start strong. Your opening is important to drawing people into the moment. Begin by offering a brief introduction of your relationship with the deceased.
From there, you might share specific stories or experiences that illustrate their character.
Finally, try to end on a hopeful note. This could be a reflection on the departed’s influence on others, a comment on what they would have wanted for their loved ones, or a direct farewell.
When writing your speech, avoid airing grievances and family issues. A memorial service is not the forum for them.
Also, while a good eulogy can include an honest appraisal of the departed’s ups and downs, when you discuss the downs, do so with purpose. For example, if their last years were spent suffering with an illness, mention this only to celebrate their strength in the face of difficult times. If they experienced family “drama,” use that as a means to talk about how they grew from those experiences.
It can be difficult, but finding a positive note to emphasize from a negative situation will allow everyone to go home feeling better about their own lives.
Finally, you might think that humor is something to be avoided at a solemn occasion, but in fact, humorous eulogies are common. While it’s important to remember that the goal is not to entertain, it’s perfectly acceptable to include funny memories and stories. A successful eulogy is about capturing the essence of a person, and for most of us, that may include humor. Solemnity is customary, but there is room for levity, if woven in respectfully.
After all, humor can be healing when in the midst of grief.
Types of Eulogies
As mentioned, there are many types of eulogies. These memorial speeches can come in all forms and have a wide variety of tones. Which you choose is dependent on what the deceased was like in life and who will be attending the service.
Common types of eulogies include:
Biographical – This takes the audience on a journey through the life of the deceased. It's a detailed tribute that offers an overview of their life, career, accomplishments, and the legacy they leave behind.
Personal Reflection – Unlike the broader scope of a biographical eulogy, a personal reflection focuses on the speaker's relationship with the deceased. It highlights personal stories, shared moments, and the qualities that made the individual special to the speaker. This offers a more intimate portrayal of who they were.
Thematic – Often delivered by clergy, this centers around a specific theme or aspect of the person's life that was particularly significant, or aims to impart a life lesson. It could focus on their passions and illustrate how those pursuits shaped their life and impacted others, or be tied to a favorite Bible verse or philosophy.
Tribute – Consider this akin to a loving toast that praises the deceased’s virtues, successes, and how they inspired others. This type of eulogy often includes anecdotes that exemplify the person's best qualities, similar to a wedding toast, but framed as a loving goodbye.
Humorous – As noted above, in some cases a humorous eulogy may be appropriate, especially if the deceased was known for their lighthearted approach to life. Note that it's crucial to gauge the audience and the context to ensure this type of tribute is fitting.
Related Content: Find Inspiration in our Obituary Template for Mothers, Fathers and More
How to Deliver a Eulogy at a Funeral
If you are delivering a eulogy, it’s important to practice beforehand, especially if you don’t usually do public speaking. Familiarize yourself with the material to the point where you can deliver it with minimal reliance on your notes. Practicing will also help you manage your nerves and to speak in a more natural way.
It’s typical for nervous speakers to rush ahead, speaking quickly in order to get through the task. If you sense yourself doing this, slow down and try to speak slowly. This ensures that attendees can absorb what you’re saying and allows time for the weight of your words to resonate with them.
Also remember that you are there to connect with those listening, so try to look up from your notes occasionally. You don’t need to make eye contact with the audience – for some speakers, this may worsen their nerves – but at least appear as if you are. An easy trick is to look above the audience at the back wall of the room.
Remember that it’s okay to speak conversationally. A eulogy should feel personal, after all. Some eulogies are delivered as if speaking directly to the person being honored. This can be effective, though keep in mind that this may overwhelm some speakers with emotion.
That said, it’s okay to show emotion. If you need to take a moment to compose yourself, do so. Remember, it's a difficult task. Those present will understand.
Finally, at the end of the eulogy, pause. This gives people a moment to reflect on your words and provides a natural conclusion to your speech.
Delivering a eulogy that will honor the deceased and bring peace to those attending the memorial service may seem like a daunting task, but with a focus on honoring the person you lost, you’ll do fine.
"ObitWriter": The All-Purpose Interactive Obituary Writing Tool
If you want an even simpler way to create an obituary, it’s fast, easy, and free to use Legacy’s ObitWriter® tool. All you have to do is answer some basic questions about your loved one’s life, and in just a few minutes, ObitWriter will take your responses and turn them into a well-written draft of a thoughtful, respectful obituary.
Ready to get started?
Ready to get started?
Our ObitWriter® Template can help you create an obituary in minutes.
Our ObitWriter® Template can help you create an obituary in minutes.
Ready to get started?
Our ObitWriter® Template can help you create an obituary in minutes.
