Thomas J. O'Bara

1968 - 2024

 

Thomas Joseph O'Bara, Exeter NH

January 10,1968 - May 1, 2024

 

Thomas Joseph O'Bara of Exeter NH passed away on May 1, 2024. He was born in Pittsburgh PA, he was the beloved son of Patricia Christine (Radovic) Denny and the late Thomas Joseph O'Bara ,Sr. .

TJ is survived by his loving, caring mother Patricia. Who admired her son’s bravery and courage.  

He is also survived by his beautiful daughter Angeline, who he was so proud of, and loved so dearly. Who blessed him with two surviving adorable and giving granddaughters, Meru and Perla.  

He is survived by his loving sister Angel, to whom he always referred to as "Ang". Two peas of the same pod, their bond with music was like no other, after all ''Music is Love".

TJ was predeceased by his father Thomas, whose footsteps he followed, with his love of football. 

He was blessed with so many friends and family that loved him so deeply.

Growing up in Pittsburgh PA as a child TJ loved playing little league baseball, being a part of the cub scouts, and playing with the neighborhood kids. He loved spending time on the weekends at the family farm, in Johnstown PA playing with his cousins, Danny and David, and his sister Angel, running thru the grapevines, playing tag.

From Pittsburgh TJ, moved to Slippery Rock with his mother and sister, where he graduated from Moniteau High School, class of 1986. TJ's outgoing personality made him one of the most popular guys in school, fitting in with all groups. Making great memories that lasted him a lifetime, with his best friends, Bart, Jay, Jerry, and Todd.

Shortly after graduating TJ moved with his family to New Hampshire, where his love for the outdoors only got fueled. He loved fishing, whether deep sea, or just casting a line in a river. He always found great enjoyment in biking, hiking, or paddling around in a canoe, or kayak.  He was always down for fun in the sun.

Tj started his work career at Sylvania, where he worked for 12 years. He moved to Exeter NH where he dedicated his last 25 years of loyal service to the Phillips Exeter Academy.  He was the best receiver that dining hall had. Tjs work ethic was like no other, never missing a day of work, he held steady at 2nd place for the most earned hours saved by an employee, also receiving a Staff Excellence Award. As he would say, '' If I miss a day of work, someone will screw everything up." His honesty admired, although unfiltered, didn't go unnoticed, even getting recognized for that as well. This is probably why his best friend, "2nd mom", Kathy as he would say, took a loving to TJ from the start. From there they bonded and formed a friendship of pure unconditional love. She is truly an Angel.

I am so proud to say the Phillips Exeter Academy has the school flag lowered to half-staff for seven days honoring my brother’s life and dedicated service. So very humbling.

TJ's love for animals, was contagious, especially his love for dogs.  Funny little story:  Tj's landlord did not take to dogs very well, however, he allowed Tj to have one, after seeing him with his dog, his landlord now has 3 himself. His love and care for the two dogs he rescued was heart filled, his first love of his life was Rocky, the second dog was Benny, she loved him so, and is still very sad herself, since his passing. His dogs were family to us all.

He was very dedicated to helping animals, raising money and awareness for the NHSPCA, doing many PAWS Walks, and took great pride in doing so.

Tj's biggest love in life was his music, preferably heavy metal. If he wasn't playing his electric guitar making his own, he would be searching for new music he hadn't heard. When you came to visit TJ, rest assured you left hearing a song,you've never heard before, just ask his best buddy Jack, who might have suffered a headache or two himself.  He influenced so many others in their love for music, starting from his early teens. He still had his entire album collection that he started as a kid. If a good show was coming, my brother was going, horns held high. I will truly miss those times, to see him so excited for me "just sit down and listen to this Ang".

 

The day my brother passed away he had 2 years and 2 days of sobriety under his belt. Of which he was extremely proud of, his eyes gleaming when telling someone, "How many days".  You could not help but to gleam yourself when seeing Tjs eyes smile. He stopped drinking on his own, no help from outside, no groups, no counseling, he just believed in himself.  Even after being diagnosed with Cancer, TJ kept that determination up, right to the end.

That is only one of the things I think we can all learn from TJ, is that only you, yourself, can be your higher power. Don't let obstacles in your life, put, as TJ wrote to me " Another brick in your Will ".

TJ was not one to get all sappy with emotions, unlike his sister who made up for his with hers, always rolling his eyes at her, he would not want his friends and family to be sad. Instead, put on your favorite song, or pick a new random song, and "Just sit down and listen." He will be listening with you, grinning from ear to ear. Unless its country music. 

 

Tj you will be truly missed, as a big brother, a son, and a friend every waking day. We love you with all of our hearts. May you rest in peace TJ. Until we see each other again, I'll keep a list of songs for you to listen to my friend, my brother, my love.....   RIP

 

Visiting hours will be held at the Stockbridge Funeral Home, 141 Epping Road, Exeter on Friday, May 10th from 5-7 PM.

 

For the celebration of life, you know my brother, casual. Please feel free to wear your favorite rock shirt, or something purple my brother’s favorite color. Even your favorite pair of Nikes.

The family asks if you would like to do something for the family or to honor TJ , donating to  his favorite cause The NHSPCA  would be what he would want.  Thank you.