Ruth Marjorie (Murphy) Belthoff
{ "" }
Share Ruth's life story with friends and family
Send an Email
Or Copy this URL to Share
Ruth Marjorie (nee Murphy), age 84, passed away peacefully at home on Sunday April 14, 2013, surrounded by her loving family.
Predeceased by her parents Thomas and Kathryn Murphy.
Devoted and wonderful wife of Robert Ernest Belthoff for 62 years. Loving mother of eleven children and their spouses: Mary Goble of New Milford; Mike Belthoff and wife June of New Milford; Tom Belthoff and wife Liz of Oradell; Patricia Weindorf and husband Gary of Point Pleasant; Kathy Lane and husband Roger of North Haledon; Peter Belthoff and wife Lisa of Oradell; Matt Belthoff and wife Mary of Wyckoff; Donna Dering and husband Dennis of Long Valley; Alan Belthoff and wife Beth-Ann of Park Ridge; Christopher Belthoff and wife Kelly of Danvers MA; and Alice Belthoff of Hackensack.
Survived by 23 loving grandchildren: Sandra Capitanello and husband Jim; Brian Belthoff and wife Laurie; Jennifer Belthoff; Bobby Belthoff and wife Erika; Tim Belthoff; Katie Belthoff; Meaghan Belthoff; Tommy Belthoff; Kevin Belthoff; Connor Belthoff; Christopher Weindorf; Craig Weindorf and wife Karen; Penny Lane; Michelle Burgess and husband Devin; Caterina Belthoff; PJ Belthoff; Gaberiella Belthoff; Natalie Belthoff; Dennis Dering; Emily Belthoff; Grace Belthoff; Kyrstin Belthoff; and Marisa Belthoff. Also survived by six beautiful great-grandchildren: Julianna and Jake Capitanello; Hannah Belthoff; Abigail Belthoff; and Lily and Kyle Burgess. Survived also by dear sister Alice Boswell. Missed by dear friend and four-legged guardian Taffy.
A graduate of Ridgefield Park High School in 1947 and a resident of New Milford all her married life. From spring to fall you could find her cheering on her beloved NY Yankees. She especially loved her Golden Retrievers, her vacations in Bermuda, and her Irish heritage. She had a kind and gentle heart that touched the lives of all those around her. Over the years she was active in her Catholic faith, including her Bible Study group, and as a Eucharistic Minister. Her spirit will live on in each of us who were blessed enough to know her.
Family will receive friends at the Beaugard Funeral Home 869 Kinderkamack Rd, River Edge NJ Wednesday and Thursday from 5-9 PM. Please contact the funeral home for the mass time which will be on Friday at St Joseph Church in Oradell, with entombment at St Joseph Cemetery to follow.
In lieu of flowers, donations in Mrs. Belthoff's memory are respectfully requested to Holy Name Hospital, Teaneck Rd Teaneck NJ ( envelopes will be provided at the funeral Home.)

To Plant Memorial Trees in memory, please visit our Sympathy Store.
Published in The Record/Herald News from Apr. 15 to Apr. 16, 2013.
No memorial events are currently scheduled. To offer your sympathy during this difficult time, you can now have memorial trees planted in a National Forest in memory of your loved one.
Memories & Condolences
Not sure what to say?
View Printed Guest Book
16 entries
April 23, 2013
I had the best mother in law anyone could ever have. She never interfered, didn't judge others, and welcomed me into her family as if I was one of her own.
Even though she was so generous and kind, she always remarked how "blessed" she was to have her family. She would say "you're all so good". If you did the littlest thing for her, she thanked you profusely. When she started forgetting things and couldn't be left alone, she would rave the next day after a family member stayed with her overnight to anyone who came by "Graphic" the next day; "Can you believe how nice it was?"

She taught me a lot in the 26 years that I knew her. She taught me about patience and love. In her own dignified and kind way, she lived her life. But along the way, she made the world a better place.

Some may have taken her placid way as being passive and without power. Really, she was powerful and determined in all the ways that were important to her. Her religion and church was something she valued tremendously and this gave her much strength to face the tough stuff in life. She believed in God and she knew He would provide for her all that she needed. She wasn't afraid to pray and she once told me she prayed for me and all of her children every single day. I was wondering how I got through some of those tough spots!
When we were in Bermuda, I took her and my young daughter to a near by church for mass. We took the shuttle there but could not get one for the return trip to the resort. We walked around curved and dangerous roads to get to a place that we could catch a local bus. She wanted to go to church, she wasn't about to complain about nearly getting killed on the way back. She just acted like it was any ordinary day, probably not wanting me to feel bad or scared for how things were turning out. Always thinking of others.
I was surprised to learn that she had her own secret "stash" where she kept an emergency $20 at all times. I only learned this because my husband hit her up for something and she made him promise he would return it in case of any other emergency. She was practical that way. She always told us we have to live within our means. She told us she and dad always had a budget and stuck to it.

I tried to thank her for teaching my husband how to cook, bake, and do laundry among many other things over the years that I knew her. She just said it was "common sense" raising kids and that all you had to do was "do it".
She set the bar high.
My husband uses her gingerbread cookie recipe passed down from her mother, and makes the best cookies every year at Christmas. I try to envision how she had all of her children stand around and watch her make the dough, shapes, and bake them to perfection. I imagine she was perfectly calm and matter of fact about the whole thing.
Same thing with laundry, cooking, and caring for a family of 13. She didi it without complaint and if the baby pictures are any indication, she did it with joy and delight.

How did she get them to stand for a holiday picture, so perfectly dressed, ready for church? She proudly told me that every Easter, each child got brand new clothing-from the underwear to the hats and coats.
She told me about volunteering at the school library once all of her children were in school. She loved being a mother and she cared so deeply for each of her children.

She once shared some notes she saved that my husband made for her when he was 7 or 8 years old. Things like, "I like you", "I love you", You are pretty", "you are nice", etc. were written all over them and were signed "Chris". That has always warmed my heart.

The proof is in the pudding. The love that her children and grandchildren had for her is evidence of her devotion and incredible success as a mother. I strive to be more like her.

I loved her so much and I miss her already. I know she is in heaven and she is at peace. But I still can't help wishing we all had a little more time with her. She and dad always waved to us, with Taffy at her side (and others before her) when we drove off to return to Massachusetts. I hope she knows how much we always loved her.

Kelly, (the last Belthoff "outlaw") and grateful daughter in law
Kelly Belthoff
April 18, 2013
Our deepest sympathy to Bobby and the Belthoff family
Pat & Bob Strom
April 18, 2013
My prayers and sympathies are with you and your family. Just know she will always be with you.
Eileen Parkhurst
April 17, 2013
We are so sorry for your loss, may god keep you strong. Our prayers are with you all.
Christy & Pat DiMarco
April 16, 2013
Our sincerest condolences to Kathy, Roger and the entire family. Larry Gruber
Larry Gruber
April 16, 2013
Our thoughts and prayers go out to all of you. So sorry for your loss.
Kelly and Larry Annunziata
April 16, 2013
trillium in New River Gorge National River
Sharon and I and the boys send our condolences to your family, and will keep you all in our prayers.
David Fuerst
April 16, 2013
May the love of family and friends carry you all through your grief. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Tom & Lori Fuerst
April 15, 2013
Thoughts and prayers to all of you......Debbie Martin
Debbie Martin
April 15, 2013
Sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts are with you.
Art Sheldon
April 15, 2013
May the love of friends and family carry you through your grief.
Amy Ludke
April 15, 2013
Many great memories of your family. So sad for your loss. With Sympathy,
Doreen DeLuca-Macchione
April 15, 2013
To All of the glad I stopped to visit last week...she was much loved by all...such a gentle woman.
You are in my prayers....
Karen Koedderich
April 15, 2013
Penny Lane, Peter Belthoff and family, Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Maria and Lou Galasso
April 15, 2013
To ALL the Belthoffs: I can't tell you how sad I was to hear of the passing of Mrs. Belthoff. She was a wonderful lady, and a wonderful neighbor to us (the Jalil's) for so many wonderful years. I will always remember her smile and how she always included us as one of her own children.
Love to all,
Cindy Jalil Kaney
Cindy Jalil-Kaney
April 15, 2013
Dear Belthoff family,
Very sad to hear of the passing of your mom and grandmom. You are all in my thoughts and prayers ...
Jim Hill
Invite others to add memories
Share to let others add their own memories and condolences