JANET ROGGENBURG Obituary

ROGGENBURG--Janet A. It is with great sorrow that we announce the passing of our gracious mother and grandmother, Janet A. Roggenburg. Born in Rochester, New York, she died on December 5, 2018, surrounded by her family at home in Little Silver, New Jersey, age 93. She was predeceased by her husband Stanley L. Roggenburg Jr. and sister Patricia. A graduate of Cornell, she later started Janet A. Roggenburg Interior Designs in New York City, retiring in 2013. Three daughters, Mary Patricia, Mary Josephine Balve and Mary Catherine Mayerhoff and four grandchildren, Kristine Balve, Sebastian Balve, Bradley and Tyler Mayer- hoff survive her. Memorial Donations may be made to Cornell.

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Published by New York Times on Dec. 16, 2018.

Memories and Condolences
for JANET ROGGENBURG

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9 Entries

Janet

Thomas Matrullo

December 10, 2020

Remembering Janet, and brightened by her memory.

Tom Matrullo

December 10, 2019

Janet was brilliant, strong minded, and funny, but she was also as loyal and thoughtful a friend as one could ever wish for. I have her last card on my desk - it simply says "I love you." I know her daughters have and impart her finest qualities - in this I find her now.

Mary Pat Roggenburg

January 10, 2019

Tonight I asked Verizon to take your cell phone off my account. I can still see that phone beside you in bed ready for the evening calls. For the rest of my life, something will prompt me to dial " JAR" but then I'll realize you already know. Thanks for listening.

Kristine Balve

January 9, 2019

I think of you each time I walk into my Morristown apartment. I still remember the day I signed my lease and brought home the floor plan. We mapped out furniture placement together and discussed the fabrics to be hung for curtains down to the placement of artwork I'd put up. Today, various pieces of your delicate furniture are tastefully placed around, including the dainty antique couch that was in your room - it's now in mine. You would love it here, I sure do because I feel your presence everyday. You're legacy lives on with me. I love you so much and miss you everyday.

Love Your Darling Sweet Girl,
Kristine

Mary Pat Roggenburg

January 6, 2019

I thought of you today as the snow fell outside Chapel of the Snows in Stratton Mountain as we prayed the
Prayer of St Francis of Assisi:
Lord make me an instrument of Thy peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy. O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is in giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, and it is in dying we are born to eternal life.

Barbara Wonson

January 3, 2019

Mary Pat, Mary Jo, and Kate - so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. She WAS a wonder! She always made me feel so welcome and so included when I visited your home, which felt like an oasis of calm and beauty in a hectic world. She was gracious and giving and raised (with help from Stanley, of course) three gracious and wonderful daughters who have continued her mission of making the world a better place. Hold her memory close to your hearts. Love, Barb

Helen McGuire

December 30, 2018

MaryPat, so sorry to hear of your loss I know you loved your mother dearly and will miss her greatly

December 28, 2018

Mary Pat, my deepest sympathy to you and your family on the loss of your gracious mother. My prayers for her eternal rest in peace, now with your Dad, Deb Simeone

Mary Jo, Janet, Katie

Tom Matrullo

December 26, 2018

Of Janet

Dear Mary Pat, Mary Jo, Katie, and all,

I have a terrible memory. Friends tell me of events I was present at, and I remember nothing -- even at times when the story is about me.

But I have a memory of Janet from over 60 years ago. I was maybe 4, and Janet was giving Mary Pat a bath in the kitchen sink in their apartment on Park Hill Avenue. I was amazed that any human could fit into a sink. And, I remember how I felt relaxed and happy there.

As I grew up, the Janet I knew was a lovely, cheerful woman with a good heart. Later I realized she also had a fine mind, a serious and inquisitive side, along with a ready wit. Her thoughts -- whether on giving up driving, or one of the grandkids' experiences in college, or on the Yankees' latest dismal showing -- came with bright wit and warmth -- a play of intelligence and honest, confiding reflection.

This past Thanksgiving Janet called, and I was very happy to hear her voice. She poked some fun at herself as she often did, but there was a difference from the last time we'd spoken, a few months before. She usually conveyed her status by pinpointing her range of motion. Now that range had narrowed precipitously. She didn't dwell on it, but it sank in.

As ever, when we said goodbye, I felt lighter for having, for a moment, the gift of her spirit -- there was no somber note -- she spared me all that, sounding as chipper as she could. That was the Janet I will always remember -- putting the other before herself.

Thinking back over several conversations over the years, each of which had its own distinct kernel of interest, I come back to how candidly she'd share her thoughts and feelings. Her honesty was realistic, but imbued with wry hope.

The Italians have a word for when an artist -- maybe a dancer, or an actor or public speaker -- does something that actually cost her or him endless pains to master, but to onlookers seems blithely effortless: sprezzatura.

Janet stayed in touch. She shared her thoughts and concerns amid life's starkest challenges with honesty, kindness and love. Unlike the practiced Italian simulating ease, she was never other than exquisitely, naturally, herself. Mostly from afar, over years of cards, banana nut loaves and telephone chats, her bright spirit was there.

My poor memory won't forget the shining gift of her grace.

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