Francis Edward Tate II

1978 - 2020

CAMBRIDGE, Mass. - Francis Edward Tate II (Frank) passed away unexpectedly in his sleep on Thursday, April 2, 2020, at his apartment in Cambridge, Mass. Born August 11, 1978, in Exeter, N.H., he was the adored son of Ned and Mimi Tate, brother of Rachel Bradt McCann, brother-in-law of Caleb McCann and uncle of Phoebe McCann. He leaves behind his cousins Julia Weekes Spuria, Jenny Weekes Koprowski, Betsy Weekes Kunz, Jack Weekes and Jeff Weekes.

He attended North Hampton Elementary School through the sixth grade, and graduated from the Fessenden School in 1993, where he earned the Head Master's Award; Brooks School in 1997, with distinction in Latin, ancient Greek and music studies; and Bates College in 2001, with a degree in the classics. His youthful summers were filled with engaging and happy activities: Beach Club swimming, Abenaqui golf, five years at Camp Kieve canoeing and hiking the Maine wilderness, and a summer program at Oxford in England. After college, he worked as a real estate broker for Tate and Foss Sotheby's International Realty in Rye. His most recent job, one he loved, was with Highbridge Concierge Company, which supplies Boston private condominium building with concierges.

Frank loved music. One of his favorite memories was playing a guitar duo of "Satin Doll" with jazz great Duke Ellington's granddaughter while at boarding school. With his father, he attended all performances of the Boston concert series of Handel and Hayden and the Boston Lyric Opera, as well as the baroque operas of the Boston Early Music Festival. While at Brooks School, he played upright bass and guitar in the school's jazz band and also performed with nearby Phillips Andover Orchestra on upright bass.

He leaves behind many friends old and new, among them Matt Smith, Elissa Burnell McGee and Diana Burnell, childhood friends who remained true until the end. Loved ones have written about their memories of Frank. First, from his sister, Rachel: "My brother, Frank, was as gentle as he was fearless. He was never lost, literally or figuratively. From Rome to Brooklyn, he could always find his way 'home.' He was a steady advocate for those in recovery and for those of us needing a nonjudgmental ear to just listen. And then there was that laugh of his that could make anyone smile. My brother was my hero. He persisted."

From his cousin Julie: "It was the expressions on Frank's handsome face that made him so very endearing. You could see it in the connection he had with his niece, Phoebe. His tall, lanky frame towered over his niece but he was anything but imposing. One minute, they would be stretched out on the floor to play a game and the next moment he would be jumping around the room, gamely answering a dance challenge to spin like a ballerina. The sound of this was the best part – Phoebe's exuberant giggles and Frank's loud bark of laughter. No matter what he was facing in life, Frank had a heart that was very kind and a smile that made you join in."

From his niece Phoebe: "Uncle Frank was so much fun. I remember trying to teach him ballet when I was three in my Nannie's living room. Last Christmas, I grabbed a large curly bow off a present and put it on his head. He loved it and laughed. He picked out a wonderful Christmas present for me last year, a wool red hat that Nannie said was very French. For the last year, I have been bringing Frank's stuffed animals over to my house to live with my stuffies. Monkey Boy now wears a dress. One Eye, a sock monkey, is my favorite, and there is brown bear."

From Elissa: "Frank is probably my oldest friend in the world. What I remember and treasure most about Frank is his kindness and his easy way with a smile. There are snippets that stand out over the years -- a birthday party where we all dressed as mobsters; his confidence as a performer in the junior high jazz band on his upright bass and then again when I saw him at Fessenden; his beaming face as an usher at my wedding. He was family, and I will always love him."

From Matt: "Frank was my best friend. Ours was my oldest friendship -- our mothers introduced us so we could have a familiar face in the classroom. As a result, our mothers each gained an unexpected son. Frank would bring his creamy peanut butter to our house, finding our chunky intolerable, but he could not escape the whole wheat crust or Brussel sprouts that my mother insisted we eat. We built "bombs" out of glue, bits of an old Walkman and an Ataris in Frank's basement. We played war, put on kung fu demonstrations, sold wooden carvings and old newspapers out of a red wagon, and we stayed up far later than allowed just to talk. That was a skill that defined Frank in my memory, one that I cherished and will miss most deeply. One could sit next to him and talk, and explore ideas freely, and he would make you feel absolutely heard and appreciated. He was curious and nonjudgmental and could find the good in anyone."

From Betty Burnell: "A month and a half ago, Mimi told me that she was speaking with Frank on the phone while he walked from his apartment on Mt. Auburn St., Cambridge, to his work in Allston. He first crossed Eliot Bridge over the Charles River, then followed a tree-lined trail towards work. Struck by the beauty of the morning, Frank exclaimed, "Gee, I'm lucky." My thought upon hearing this tale, was that Frank was a natural teacher. From Frank's quiet lesson perhaps we, too, can notice the awaiting treasures on our pathways."

From Tom Mackie: "I recall spending the summers of our childhood chasing one another around. First on our feet, then in the water, then the tennis courts, and eventually in endless nights of flashlight tag. One of the fondest memories I have of Frankie was our time in a summer program at Oxford in England. He helped me learn to have a sense of adventure that I have never lost. I have been thinking a lot of Frankie and there is a constant thread -- his contagious laugh, thoughtful nature and clever comments. There are some childhood friends you just carry with you in spirit."

From Steward Mackie: "I remember countless hours of our youth at the beach in the frigid pool for swim team, playing games on the deck, pulling out splinters from each other's feet, playing on the trampoline in my barn and playing ping pong in Frank's basement. Frankie has a way of bringing levity and joy to all those around him. The world is a sadder place without him."

From Molly, his addiction counselor, in a 2016 letter: "I cannot tell you how much I admire and respect you. During your life you've had to deal with some things that were not easy or fair. Despite this, you found a way to become a kind, compassionate, and nonjudgmental person who is selfless to a fault. My hope for you is that you see all of those wonderful traits that you possess. You are not your addiction. Sure, your addiction is a part of you, but it is just that -- a part of you. It is not all of you, nor does it have to dictate your future. Don't give up on yourself and what you deserve. You are too good of a person to not have the life that you want.

At the time of his death, Frank was enjoying an excellent hard-fought place in his recovery. He described this place to us as an awakening and an ability to really see. To continue this fight for others living with substance abuse, we ask that you do not send flowers. Instead, send donations to: Safe Harbor Recovery Center, 865 Islington St, Portsmouth, NH 03801. Private burial will be in Rye Cemetery.