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Craig David Kyte

1943 - 2017

Craig David Kyte obituary, 1943-2017, Seattle, WA

Craig Kyte Obituary

Craig David Kyte

Craig David Kyte, born September 25, 1943, died November 1, 2017 of alcohol-related disease.

An only child of Frank and Evelyn, Craig grew up near Disneyland, then went to a small Christian college in Santa Barbara, where he came to realize he was gay. On the first day of school, he befriended a young straight lad, David Hull, who in time introduced him to his first gay friend, Mark Benson. As these three friends in the company of one another grew into who they were, a remarkable friendship was forged that endured throughout their lives.

After graduating from San Francisco State College, Craig joined the Peace Corps and taught English in Ethiopia, where he came to love its food, its art, and its people. Ethiopia influenced his taste and brought into high relief the common humanity just inside the skin.

His career began and ended at Seattle Public Library. Not long after he began in 1972, he was appointed head of the Government Documents Department. While there, Craig received the Rinehart Librarian Award which "honors the librarian who demonstrates innovation, provides excellent service for patrons, and nurtures personal talents of others." He was instrumental in the modernization of reference work at the Seattle Public Library, leading committees which set internal standards for reference and customer service. In 1998, he served on a team that received the City Librarian's Award for bringing innovations to internet reference work, including the introduction of "Live Help," an early version of the online "Ask a Librarian."

A gifted conversationalist who remembered the things and people important to his acquaintances, Craig thereby forged lasting friends wherever he went. Right to the end, even in pain, he was interested in what his friends were doing and how their wives, husbands, lovers, and friends were.

Throughout his tenure, Craig was the recognized fashion icon of the library staff, though he wore that recognition lightly and with pointed humor, once remarking upon institution of "Casual Fridays" that he had no jeans, so he would simply "not press my pants for that day."

Craig was so valued by his fellow workers that he was elected president of his union, and was so effective in negotiations with library management that he was co-opted into management, where he made still another round of friends, rising to Head of General Reference. In October, 2008, he retired.

In his private life, not long after returning from Ethiopia, he and Jim Bush moved in together in 1978. Jim completed a doctorate at University of San Francisco and became a professor of nursing at University of Washington. Each evening, as Jim and one of their condo friends, Cate Mallory, returned home after work, they would pause on their doorsteps to review the state of the world and how "they were not listening to us." Each summer for years, Craig and Jim would spend a week on the seacoast of the Olympic peninsula. They were a solid and loving couple for 28 years; then Jim died in 2006. Craig's two orange tabbies, Harold and Memo, aka the Marmalade Twins or "the boys," became his closest companions in the last few years.

Craig had exquisite taste not only in clothing but also in whatever he touched. Each element of furnishing and decoration in his condo bore evidence not only of quality and distinction, but also balance and careful deliberation. Red glass informs dark wood, sliding Japanese paper screens in delicate wooden frames delineate rooms, a carved Asian-like scene answers a painting or the dramatic enlarged photograph of a dove descending-by Mark.

Craig's taste extended notably to music, and the symphony and opera were daily staples as well as season tickets. He went to Europe in 2013 on a tour of Master Composers, which not only deepened his love of J. S. Bach (resulting in hundreds of Bach CDs) but also resulted in new friends, one of whom-Cheryl Gagne-turned out to live only two blocks away.

As his disease progressed, his friends picked up the dropped threads of his life, especially but not exclusively those friends in his condo and immediate neighborhood--

Bryan Harrison, Cate and Cheryl-assuring his monthly bills were paid, his cats fed, and taking him as needed to hospital.

David visited Craig in December, thinking it was to say goodbye, but daring to hope. Then Mark as a medical person and with Craig's medical power of attorney, prepared the steps necessary for Craig to undergo a medical alcoholic detox-and his agreement to each step was a surprise approaching the miraculous to both David and Mark. Mark had begun occasional interactive updates to Friends of Craig, which bound together his friends and increased their contact with Craig. He emerged sober and had four months, during which friends far and wide came to visit him. He celebrated his 74th birthday all day long with various friends.

Mark and David held an Open House Memorial in his condo on November 5, attended by 23 friends. Craig's wide embrace of friendship was on view there, with people including friends from his condo, his home health care, his library years, his gardener, the world at large, and his love of music...including an English horn musician from the Seattle Symphony, Glen Danielson, who declared that Craig could "lecture on Bach."

Craig wrote poetry his entire life. After Ethiopia he became less open about his private life, but his deepest thoughts and feelings were transmuted by his art, finding abstracted but powerful and clear-eyed expression in his poems. From "In the End": "...sorrow, like banked fog against summer shores/drifting toward the last nadir of night...."

Sign Craig's on-line

Guest Book at www.Legacy.com

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by The Seattle Times on Nov. 12, 2017.

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Jim Taylor

November 21, 2017

This extraordinary obituary is such a fitting, accurate and tender remembrance of Craig. Thank you so much. Good bye dear friend.

Doug Barnes

November 19, 2017

Craig brought me on staff at Seattle Public Library and became a friend and mentor. He cared about his staff and gave them room to grow and encouraged innovation. Even after he retired he contacted me to donate computer equipment to New Freeway Hall, a community center I work at and center for organizing in defense of those who are often ignored in this society. Craig was always concerned about the individual, at the same time the larger struggles for human rights and dignity. I'll miss him greatly.

Greg Kucera

November 17, 2017

I did not know Craig but this is one of the most remarkable and touching obituaries I have ever read. It brought tears to my eyes to realize that this man, despite his debilitating illness, had friends who never gave up on him.

People often say that funerals aren't for the dead but for the living. I can see that sentiment in this writing because it tells his full story. It allows his friends to grieve but also to honor him. The writer(s) speaks so well of him but also of his friends who saw him through to the end, all the way to some form of redemption late in life.

Gay family ---chosen family---can be very strong family and it is illustrated clearly here. You were all lucky people to have known him and it sounds like he was extremely lucky to know you.

Ethylanne Larrimore

November 15, 2017

Craig was a valuable addition to Seattle Public Library's services. So competent on all aspects of reference work and government documents.

November 14, 2017

We are sorry to learn of the passing of Craig, but grateful for his service to our nation with the Peace Corps in Ethiopia.

Our Condolences,
The National Peace Corps Association

Anne Cisney

November 13, 2017

This may be the most beautiful obituary I have ever read. It is such an honor to be able to see Craig's life beyond the glimpse I was privileged to see as his one time colleague.

raymod d

November 13, 2017

I became aquainted with Craig when he started to work at the Seattle Public Library. I was drawn to his insight, his calm demeanor, his clarity in communication... and his quiet sense of humor which can catch you off guard. I remember the fun we had cross country skiing with a group of library staff in Winthrop. Craig was very encouraging during my first attempts on skis. I learned from Craig over the years and will miss him.

Jonlee Nunn

November 12, 2017

Thank you for this honest, heartwarming tribute to your friend. I never met Craig, but wish I had. Why did I read an obituary of someone I did not know? Three reasons. His photo caught my eye-a kind face. That he died of an alcohol related disease, often covered up: we lose so many to this deadly disease. Thirdly because he was gay, another thing usually not mentioned. This man was loved by many loyal friends. I loved hearing about his travels, decorating his condo, and his love of classical music. I think I will listen to Bach again. I will think of Craig.
Jonlee Nunn

Toni Myers

November 12, 2017

The world has lost a lovely and learned man. so sad.

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