Robert Montstream

1931 - 2023

October 31, 1931 - October 19, 2023|On a clear night under a star filled sky, Bob peacefully left this world. Bobcat, as he was affectionately known, was surrounded by his adoring family in his home in Old Wethersfield, CT, where he had lived for 58 years. His family and many friends knew him for his kindness, unending love, expressive gratitude, thoughtful guidance, and deep generosity. He was 91.



Born to Edith and John Montstream in Garden City, NY, he was due on November 1st- All Saints Day. But instead, he arrived a day early, on Halloween, and was proud to say he was a Goblin. His Swedish grandparents came to the United States in the 1890s as Bergstroms, but they soon translated the name to Montstream (Bergstrom means "mountain stream").



Bob graduated from Wesleyan University in 1954 with a degree in biochemistry. In 1956, he enlisted in the Army and was stationed in La Rochelle, France. Months before he left for France, he and Amalie "Ami" Hughes started a long distance courtship that soon turned into an engagement. When Dad left for France, they made a pact for her to join him and marry in La Rochelle. So Mom boarded a small student ship to meet Bob. Part way through the journey, a Swedish ship put out an SOS signal when one of their sailors needed medical attention. Since Mom's ship had a doctor on board, they changed course and went to assist. Meanwhile, the Andrea Doria, a luxury transatlantic ship, collided with a freighter and sank. Mom's boat was delayed and Bob had no information on which ship went down. Dad was AWOL as he waited for days not knowing if Ami would ever arrive. Finally, her ship pulled in and Bob returned to the base with his bride-to-be only to be assigned to dig ditches for days as his punishment for not returning to base on time. Bob and Ami were married on August 4, 1956.



Returning to the US in 1958, Bob sold health insurance and applied to law school. He was accepted at UCONN Law School for night classes. But when his boss learned he was attending law school, he got a "punishment transfer" to San Francisco. Not one to be slowed down, Bob enrolled in night classes at University of San Francisco School of Law. Once again, when this boss discovered he was attending law school, he, Ami, and baby Katharine were transferred, this time to Phoenix, Arizona. With no law school there, they did not stay long. The three of them traveled by car to Hartford, Connecticut where he re-enrolled in UCONN Law School, attending both daytime classes and night school until he graduated in 1964.



In the early 1970s, Bob started his own law practice as a defense litigator. His briefcase and dictaphone were never far from his side. In keeping with Dad's Halloween theme, he delighted in retiring from his firm, Montstream & May, on Friday the 13th (December 13, 1996). He loved lawyer jokes and happily surprised people when he'd say they were all true.



When it comes to passions, Bob had many. A close second to his family were skiing, birding, biking, and sailing. For years, he rode his bike daily into the Wethersfield Meadows, while donning his 1970s bike helmet. More recently, he rode his stationary bike multiple times per day, aiming to "get to celery" – the green zone where you exceed 10,000 steps daily. His longest streak, 34 days, ended on September 24. Being a Bobcat, he would meow when you gave him a back massage.



Trick-or-treating was high on his list of fun things to do with the kids, especially in the Alfred Drown neighborhood in Barrington, so Halloweens were spent in costume with many entertaining Halloween birthday parties. Being 100% Swedish, he loved dressing as a Viking.



Bob's family and friends knew him for his joyful smile and his bright blue eyes. At 91, the parade of loving family and friends who visited him while he was in hospice care at home was extraordinary and very moving. He openly expressed his love for each of them. In his last weeks he shared, "Now I'm just trying to hang on to congratulate those around me- for all they've done and what they'll do in the future."



Bobcat is survived by his bride of 67 years, Amalie Maxon Hughes Montstream of Wethersfield, their three children and families: Katharine Montstream and husband Alan Dworkshak, and their children Charlotte, Torsten and Sylvie all of Burlington, VT; Walter Montstream and his dog Wyatt of Hebron, CT; Sydney Montstream-Quas and husband Michael Quas of Barrington, RI, and their children, Adeline and Maxon; brother John Montstream and wife Marion of Rochester, NY; sister-in-law Gini Hughes Anslinger of Altoona, PA; nephew Jim Montstream and his husband Mike Schiele of Burlington, VT; cousin Jan Larkin of West Hartford, CT; and "adopted" son Eduardo Lex and wife Diana Lex of Colchester, CT. He was predeceased by his nephew, Johnny Montstream of Rochester, NY.



A Halloween-themed Celebration of Love will be held in Old Wethersfield at the Kenney Memorial Cultural Center on Sunday, December 17 from 4:00 - 7:00pm. Costumes encouraged and friendly goblins kindly invited.



In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to:

RI Coalition Against Gun Violence

265 Oxford Street

Providence, RI 02905

https://ricagv.org/donate/