Search by Name

Search by Name

FUNERAL HOME

Doolittle Funeral Home

14 Old Church Street

Middletown, Connecticut

Jane McMillan Obituary

Jane d'Entremont Stokes McMillan took her final curtain call on December 29, 2023 after a  years-long struggle with Parkinsons.  A life-long theater lover, Jane has left behind a devoted audience of family and friends, witnesses to her life's adventures.  Family includes sisters Anne McAlaine and her husband Bob and Maggie Stokes and her partner Jim Graham.  She also leaves her daughters Margaret McMillan, Betsy Gordon and Lucy McMillan, and her son Edward McMillan, and Traci Higgins who became part of the McMillan family when her own mother passed away.  Among her familial admirers are in-laws Pierluigi Balduzzi, Michael Gordon, Jackie McMillan and Edward McKeon and her grandchildren Alex Balduzzi, Nick Gordon, and wife Rory, Teddy Gordon, EG McMillan, Andrew McMillan, Dawson McMillan, Dermot McMillan and Aidan McMillan.  Jane also recently welcomed two great-grandchildren, Harrison and Holden Gordon. Jane leaves a host of in-laws, cousins, nieces and nephews.  She was predeceased by her husband Edward "Reds" McMillan.

Jane was born November 28, 1937, in Manhattan, and grew up with her parents Esther and Thomas Stokes.  She attended Convent of the Sacred Heart 91st Street and Manhattanville College. She later followed her husband to Texas for his military service, eventually receiving her bachelor's degree from the University of Pennsylvania, and her law degree from the State University of New York, Buffalo.  Their itinerant early family life following Reds' career as a school administrator took them to Narberth, PA, Wellesley, MA, Shaker Heights, Ohio, Smethport, PA and finally to Middletown Connecticut where they lived for fifty years.  In each of their hometowns they made friendships that have lasted a lifetime. In Connecticut, Jane began her law career at one of Connecticut's premier firms, Day, Berry & Howard in Hartford. In 1979 she joined a Middletown law firm, Shaw & Howard which later became Howard & McMillan. She retired from the firm in 2017. In Middletown, Jane continued her lifelong love of learning by pursuing a Master's degree at Wesleyan University.  Jane was a born actress, always ready with a dramatic, and often hilarious retelling of an anecdote.  If there was some exaggeration in the retelling, Jane would wink and quote Twain, "Never let the truth get in the way of a good story."

Jane was never happier than when she was attending a theater production.  Inspired by her study of Irish literature, Jane created her own local theater company, The Vintage Players, producing highly-anticipated annual shows benefiting local non-profits.  Jane discovered a new avocation as producer, director and actor.  Though slowed by disease, she continued mounting these productions through the years, the most recent in her Middletown backyard. Jane was always a community leader.  She was elected to Middletown's Common Council, and served one term.  She was a founding director of the Community Foundation of Middlesex County.  She was instrumental in saving the legendary O'Rourke's Diner after a devastating fire, and was a leader in converting Main Street's old armory into a still-thriving hotel. She sat on the Ethics Committee for Middlesex Hospital, and served on the boards of many local organizations, including Oddfellows Playhouse. In 2000 the Middlesex Chamber of Commerce named Jane and Reds McMillan Citizens of the Year for their tireless work in the community. Jane was an avid world traveler and was amazingly well-informed, and well-read and was an active member of her local book club whom she hosted for their annual holiday gathering just weeks ago.  She worried about the world's fragile condition, and what it would become for her grandchildren, and so with a boundless generosity donated to arts, social, environmental, religious, health, mental health, educational and progressive political candidates and causes. Jane was interred at Indian Hill Cemetery in a small Catholic ceremony for the immediate family. Donations in Jane's memory may be made to Gilead Community Services.

https://gileadcs.org/donate/  Checks can be mailed to 222 Main St Ext., Box 1000, Middletown, CT 06457. The family will host a celebration of life honoring Jane on June 29th at Oddfellows Playhouse, Middletown, from 3-7 PM, for one final ovation.  To share memories or send condolences to the family, please visit www.doolittlefuneralservice.com

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by Hartford Courant on Jan. 7, 2024.

Memories and Condolences
for Jane McMillan

Sponsored by the family.

Not sure what to say?





guy santostefano

February 17, 2024

Hey Eddie and Lucy, my deepest sympathies for you both. I remember your mom, and dad, fondly, going back to our beloved baseball years in Middletown.

Eric Kabel

January 16, 2024

I remember Mrs. McMillan and admired her devotion to making Middletown a better place. She made an impact and had a life well lived. Sending my sympathies to her family.

Vunay Nguyen

January 14, 2024

In July 2019 I started cooking for Jane. Some of her favorite meals were my lemongrass chicken (she said it was even better than Lan Chi's), raspberry-glazed salmon, shepherd's pie, her family's meat loaf recipe, and she always requested her favorite sides of mashed potatoes and spinach with almost every meal.
Jane and I shared a love for Zinnias. This year she let me harvest some of her seeds which I will plant in her memory and continue to save them for each new growing season. Zinnias will always remind me of Jane and make me smile. My condolences to her family for their loss.

John Robinson

January 9, 2024

Praying for the McMillan family. I have so many fond memories of Ed & Jane growing up in Middletown. May the good Lord be with the Family.

Dic Wheeler

January 5, 2024

Lots of love to the entire extended family on your loss. Jane is a great loss to the Middletown community, which will be felt in many places and in many ways. We are so flattered to host her Celebration at Oddfellows.
big hugs to all,
Dic

Julie Perkins

January 5, 2024

I first met Jane at an outdoor event (can´t remember what) in 1980. I was 24 or 25 and she was in her early 40s. We got to talking and discovered a shared sense of humor. Then the conversation turned to cartwheels. "Can you do one?" she challenged me. I could and I did. "Can you?" She could and she did. We continued to do cartwheels for several years after that on random outdoor occasions. Then one time I ran into her again and practically the first thing she said was, "I´ll tell you one thing ... no more cartwheels for me." I´ll miss you, Jane.

Chris Rodenhizer

January 4, 2024

In 1987 I married and we received a set of candlestick holders from Jane and Reds. A typical wedding gift one might think, but this set was stunning. Made of crystal, they carry a classic sense of elegance and dazzle us in the unique way the light hits them.
Like those candlestick holders, Jane was elegant and classy, yet also witty and warm.
On New Year´s Eve this year, days after Jane´s passing we dined at home. Nothing fancy, save one candlestick holder, candle lit, and a toast to Jane.
Rest in Peace, Jane. We´ll miss you.

Richard Kamins

January 4, 2024

Jane put together the Vintage Players initially as a script-in-hand play reading group. With the addition of Carolyn Kirsch, the group moved off-script. We had so much fun with the "Irish Plays", performing at the Russell House, at Oddfellows, at Russell Library, The Buttonwood Tree, Adath Israel Synagogue and elsewhere. She had a wicked sense of humor and she brought great light to our community. She will be missed.

Kurt Rodenhizer

January 4, 2024

I know Jane because my parents were good friends with her and her husband Reds. Their children were close to our age and we spent time with each other as we grew up. We used to go to the McMillan house to sing Christmas carols and we got together to play tennis and ping pong. I admired Jane because she was charitable and she was considerate of the less fortunate. Her dedication to the local soup kitchen and other charities was an inspiration. Jane was thoughtful and sophisticated. In other words, by definition, she was class.

Showing 1 - 9 of 9 results

Make a Donation
in Jane McMillan's name

Memorial Events
for Jane McMillan

Jun

29

Visitation

3:00 p.m. - 7:00 p.m.

Oddfellows Playhouse

128 Washington Street, Middletown, CT 06457

Funeral services provided by:

Doolittle Funeral Home

14 Old Church Street, Middletown, CT 06457

How to support Jane's loved ones
Honor a beloved veteran with a special tribute of ‘Taps’ at the National WWI Memorial in Washington, D.C.

The nightly ceremony in Washington, D.C. will be dedicated in honor of your loved one on the day of your choosing.

Read more
Attending a Funeral: What to Know

You have funeral questions, we have answers.

Read more
Should I Send Sympathy Flowers?

What kind of arrangement is appropriate, where should you send it, and when should you send an alternative?

Read more
What Should I Write in a Sympathy Card?

We'll help you find the right words to comfort your family member or loved one during this difficult time.

Read more
Resources to help you cope with loss
How to Cope With Grief

Information and advice to help you cope with the death of someone important to you.

Read more
Estate Settlement Guide

If you’re in charge of handling the affairs for a recently deceased loved one, this guide offers a helpful checklist.

Read more
How to Write an Obituary

Need help writing an obituary? Here's a step-by-step guide...

Read more
Obituaries, grief & privacy: Legacy’s news editor on NPR podcast

Legacy's Linnea Crowther discusses how families talk about causes of death in the obituaries they write.

Read more
Ways to honor Jane McMillan's life and legacy
Obituary Examples

You may find these well-written obituary examples helpful as you write about your own family.

Read more
How to Write an Obituary

Need help writing an obituary? Here's a step-by-step guide...

Read more
Obituary Templates – Customizable Examples and Samples

These free blank templates make writing an obituary faster and easier.

Read more
How Do I Write a Eulogy?

Some basic help and starters when you have to write a tribute to someone you love.

Read more