Alphonso Joseph Stanislaus Fernandes

Our letter to you, Dad,

This is the hardest thing I have ever written to date, but also so filled with love, pride and immense gratitude to you, Dad. I have the privilege of writing this on behalf of Mum, Satish, Megan, Safia, Samara, Savanna, Marcus and myself. And your brothers and sisters, cousins, many close friends, colleagues and admirers all over the world and in heaven.

It was our honor to have shared our lives with you. Such a proudly patriotic man, always so staunchly connected to your hometown (Mangalore) and your country (India) you taught us all to carry that pride. I will never forget the fond stories you have shared with us of your happy childhood. Even though you grew up without much, your cherished so warmly the affection and strong bonds with your parents and your 9 brothers and sisters. As the second youngest in the family, I'm sure you honed your mischievous wit and sense of humor early on.

Your ambition and commitment to life was so evident early on, as you were one of the few in those times to travel so far from home to get your Engineering degree in Guindy. I recall clearly the stories of hardships you bore to get that education, yet the fond and cherished bonds you built with your "Guindy boys" that last until today! It is a further testament to your burning ambition that your design of a record player was selected nationally for a scholarship to The Confederate of British Industry, allow you to represent India so proudly in England for 2 years.

And then you met our lovely Mum! How grateful we are for that day, that you chose her and she chose you. Your marriage was tested early on, living in a foreign country with no family close by. But you soon welcomed your first born child, a son so precious and so close to your heart. Our Satish was always your pride and joy, and you would be so, so proud of his strength these past few days, Dad.

But let me write more about you and Mum. How you loved her voice, her kindness, her generosity to everyone and her cooking! The home you built (literally!) with her, every element designed together and the life you gave us all - the many road trips, the many parties in our home, the nieces and nephews you always welcomed, the commitment to our church and church friends, and the security you always gave us allowed us to have such a wonderful, carefree, and much cherished childhood. 44 years together with Mum...even in that you were so dedicated and strong. We are grateful for these examples you set for us, Dad.

And then came me...the little one. And we became the 4 S's. I will always be your little Dottie! I recall endless and cherished time spent in your lap, and a little less cherished (at that time) was having to learn Math from you!! But I have the honor of having had the "mouschy kiss" invented specially for me by you.

And speaking of commitment, I have to write about your 25+ years at Telco and Mercedes-Benz Pune. How dedicated, ambitious and driven you were about your work, your career...and your 10,000+ boys! I remember so many friends, lessons, hard days at work and successes you had during those years.

And then finally you got to build your dream, your precious Silver Springs! Most people want an easier life post retirement but you still had so much energy in you Dad, to build your "heaven on earth" with 4,000+ fruit trees, your beautiful farm house (with Mangalore tiles, of course!), all kinds of animals (from cows to porcupines to crabs) and beautiful nature all around. All with your typical vision, attention to detail, patience, commitment, and sweat. Your zest for life captured and built for all to enjoy.

And saving some of the best for last. You were so proud of your new children, Marcus and Megan...welcoming them and their families into ours. It was so special to you to see us build our own lives, and we were honored to share some of that with you, Dad. Oh, and your 3 little grandchildren!! Their precious "Aaja"! How much joy they brought to you, and affectionately you shared their innocent and funny stories with anyone who would listen. You will forever be "MY Aaja" to them, Dad.

And now its time to say thank you. What a loaded word because there is so much to thank you for. And each day we will find new memories to thank you for...your love of life, your family values, your love for youth and children, your loyalty, your work ethic, and of course your quick wit and jokes. But until the day we meet again, just "thank you" will have to suffice. We are proud of you, Dad. You stayed "fighting fit" till God claimed you back. But we will never say goodbye, because we know you will always be with us.

With a heart bursting with love and as your youngest child, I write for us all, Dad. Jeete raho, Dad, Mog asundi.

Your Darling D,
Shwetha