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Fou Saephanh Obituary
SAEPHANH, Fou Tong
2/12/34 - 1/24/07
Our deepest sorrow is that you're no longer with us. You left us peaceful memories; your love and leadership give us guidance. Survived by a wife, five sons, three daughters, and many grandchildren.
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Darren
August 20, 2007
I do not know the family in any way, i stumbled across this page by accident.But having lost my father also i feel your sadness and loss.Have strength in the fact you were able to learn from such a man.
regards
Darren
Kae Phanh
April 21, 2007
Hello dad, couple days ago I had a dream of you coming back to visit us. In the dream it was brought back to when I was younger in my high school years @ Sou's house where all your kids have grown up together. Anywho, it was a good discussions we had it almost felted like the last time I had with you on my last visit when you were still living. It was taken place downstair in the diner room where I stand and saw you come to visit. I was happy to see you back and asked how you've been doing since you've been gone. You answered me: "I'm fine and well and there is not much to do". I asked you where are you at now dad? you answered "I'm in Cambodia right now, sleeping til mid afternoon." I replied: me too.. sometimes I can't seem to go to sleep and stayed up all night and sleeps when the sun comes out. You *giggled* "sounds like me.. you explained and said that is why you can only see me at night. Just as the sun comes out the sunlight touches me you won't see me again.. but, when nightfalls arrives, that's when you can see me again, you explained." At this point during our conversation I can see you coming closer and looked into your eyes.. you looked younger and slender. I hesitated when I looked straight at you in the eyes, I see you had no eye whites, all pitch black. Even though I was scared for a second, I still managed to act as if we were still having a regular conversation and at this point I told you to wait and let me get mom. At the same time I ran upstairs to get mom. I found mom on the edge of my bed embroidering near the window. I was so happy to tell mom the news that you had come back to visit us. Just when I finished saying that, you came right behind me and stood right where you used to slept those years when we lived in that master bed room house. All in a sudden the light shines on your face and you had a guitar and started to sing to mom. You sing a love song to her.. in your songs you say that she was the 'only one' I was sitting next to mom and see you did that cubid arrow with your sign language.. to mom. I looked at mom, she was full of love for you and acknowledged that cubid arrow for her heart, she too did the sign language of receiving your cubid arrow of love and she took it and sends it right back at you. While all this sign language is going on you were singing the whole time and I can hear the music you played it was so lovely. If I hear the music again I still can recall it. At one point I remembered all your lyrics and as days go by I can't remember it, all I can recall now is "Only You". As the daylight reaches you.. you began to vanish. Everything was happening so fast. Before you vanished, I remembered the kids.. Nai Linh, Mey Linh, Karen, Nai Chiem, Shannon were a little kid again at like the ages of 2-4 years old running upstair to see what was going on.. While all this grand childrens of yours were rushing in the room to see the commotion, I was asking the little ones "where is Jezemae?" and find her hiding behind the big kids. I looked at Jezzie and she was at the age of a 2yr old again and I told her to look at grandpa before he goes away. So, everyone did get a chance to look at him before he vanished. Right when you were gone.. all the kids thought the wall was a push of a button like the karaoke and all ran to push the wall and wanted to see it again. Then, I woke up with my heart filled with LOVE. As you bring the feeling of love back to my life. Thank you dad for watching over us. I never knew how much I love you until you were gone.
I also wanted to deeply 'Thank you' again for the first dream that I had of you watching over a baby girl that I have never met in real life but in my dreams saying that she was meant for A'Ou and Mey. This was truely a miracle. I believe there is life in heaven watching over us every day/night. May you rest in peace dad. Until we meet again in a dream.
Nai Linh Saephan
February 19, 2007
If only you can come back to us. You was a strong man living until ur early 70's. No one would've known that you were sick. Just earlier that day you were laughing and eating with the loved ones... i guess it was inevitable. it wouldve happened no matter what. ur blood vessel burst. :'[ when grandma started banging on the door and then told us what was happening i was so scared. i didn't want to go over there. then suddenly i heard the sirens. i knew that they were coming over here and that it was SERIOUS. so i went over there and saw ur body lying there with the paramedics over u. i asked karen what happened and she told me that peaqv was calling for you but you didn't answer so he went to go check up on you. thats when sandy called 911. they put ur body on the stretcher and u didn't have ur eyes open. it didn't hit me yet. i didn't know what to think. and then we went to go see u in the hospital. grandma was just leaving. her eyes were red. she told me that you wasn't going to be okay...man... :'[ i saw you laying in bed with the ventilator helping you breathe. i saw fahm and she asked for the doctor. he told us "there's nothing that can be done" ARGH. it was true i guess. the brain was filled with too much blood then the blood vessel popped and there was no more blood flowing to the brain. your heart was still pumping though. the only choice we had was when to pull the plug. we wanted everyone to see you first before it was official. Kae moua brought lex and lou came to see u too. when uncle tom said in mien to me "no more grandpa" thats when i cried so much for you. realizing that tomorow was the last day of seeing u ever again. everything we've been through especially those childhood memories. i hear i was one of ur favorites? =] i left the hospital and didn't sleep till 3. woke up 2 hours later because koo called. then got up half an hour later and got ready for school. i didn't want to go. the next day january 24. i knew there was no chance of surviving this but i still had hope. i wanted to be there when they pulled the plug but i was 3 minutes late! i'm sorry. i looked at u and u looked so skinny. ur hand was turning green... ong i miss you. i'm never going to see you wandering outside anymore with ur pimp hat. =) but when uncle moved ur head for respect. i cried so hard.. some of the young ones didn't get to see u. but im thankful that i did. the nurse told us that we had to leave because the next shift was coming. that was the last time i ever got to see you. i still remember when you used to hold me as a young kid. remember those chinese concert movies? remember when you came downstairs with a dress on because we didn't have AC in the summer? i love u Ong. You will always be remembered forever in all of our hearts...
James Phan
February 16, 2007
As the tears fall down my eye for the last time i got to see you..many memories got to my head as my tears fell...i always thought of spending time to spend with you to get to know you more and be more closer but i never got the chance to do so..you help me out when i needed you most for my health..you pray and spoke your words out to the spirts for me to get better.. as time past by i have gotten better and better..thanks to you my skin was in better shape...you will always be my heart and i will always have a spot there for you..since your gone now..i hope for the best of you and i hope to join you sometime soon or sometime later...you're my hero and my grandpa..i miss you and i have always LOVE you..my loving for you will never stop..I LOVE YOU GRANDPA
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Nancy Saephan
February 15, 2007
Sadness cannot describe how I felt when I heard that you passed away...I knew that it was too late for me to get to know you better or come visit you more often..but your memory will forever stay with me and my children and so on. You are a great man and will never be forgotten Patc Ah.
Kae (Your 7th child)
February 13, 2007
Happy Be-lated Birthday Dad.
All of this years you've been celebrating our mien birthday (lunar calendar) I never knew on document it's just a day after mine (Feb 11th). Each year now that I celebrate my birthday I will celebrate yours spiritually in hearts and will light a candle for you. Happy Birthday Dad!!!
It's almost been a month since you left this world. It's real hard for me to accept the fact that you were really gone. It's like a nightmare I woke up to.. like a fuzzy dream. But, it's not, I know I was there for your 3 days of funeral ceremony. I guess it's still new to me. I can still recall the day I drop you off to your morning senior activity at the Lemon Hill Senior Home.. not so long ago, on my last visit on December 2006.
Now each time my trip to Sacramento will be a greater challenge. Every time I visited my family in Sacramento I am so used to seeing you and the whole family there. Now, it will be very hard to accept the fact that you are gone and no longer there, to greet us home, to have that little chat with Phi, Lex and Jezemae.
However, it's nice to know that you lived your life to the fullest. I want you to know, what an honor I have, being Daddy's Little Girl. Our family will truly missed you, and will Never be Forgotten.
Sarah Saelee
February 13, 2007
Dear Ong,
I cant believe your not here anymore. This was all so sudden..im just glad you didnt have to go through pain or suffer.you were so healthy.. i would see you would walk around the neighborhood or even just stand outside the house b4 i went to school..you didnt even mind walking to the grocery stores or riding your bike to that 1 wedding..it seems you loved being active and keeping your body healthy..where do u ever see a 72 year old that healthy and strong like you? I would hear you play youR flute outside, sum of my friends noticed you and asked me "Sarah, i think i seen ur g-pa playing the flute outside" and im like YUP thats my g-pa..Your so talented. You can seep mienh..talk in all types of languages as well as understand them,read n write in chinese,play different kinds of instruments. i remember you taught me how to gamble and i was just a lil gurl. It thought it was so fun. When you lived w/ us..i always used to go in your room and tell you to play it w/ me. You were also so friendly and talkative. You knew sum of my friends dad/g-ma and if i were to ask them bout you, i kno they will say only good things about you. These memories will be cherished and i will never 4get you.
You were my only g-pa and i no longer have any. I will miss you and im so sorry you didnt get to see my baby boy. I promise i will tell him everything about you.Please look out for me and give me a sign when things arent going rite.You will be remembered and missed by many. Ill see you sumday, sumwhere in the future.
Love,
Your Grand Daughter,
Sarah
Tom Saephanh
February 12, 2007
Happy Birthday, Dad.
Today (Feb. 12th) is your birthday. We're sadden that you didn't quite make it to your 73rd birthday.. You'll be missed by your family members, friends, and relatives who have been coming to your birthday parties in the past years.
When I go to your house I see Mom there alone, the house seem so empty without you. It is so difficult for me to accept the fact that you were gone. We want you to know that you will always be in our hearts, your Wisdom and your good Spirit will always be with us as our guiding light.
Each year when we celebrate our Mien New Year, I know it won't be the same without you. Our yearly King Pan Festival in Oakland won't be as much fun without you (playing your music instruments) in the Parade.
Lora Saechao
February 12, 2007
As far as I can date back, which is the age of 5, I always considered you as my grandpa. You were always the grandpa I never had. You were always so energetic, always dancing and sharing your wonderful music with us. There wasn’t a day where you didn’t have a smile on your face, a day that you didn’t let pass by without making sure we were happy and not hungry. We will always love you. We will always miss you. You will never ever be forgotten.
AnaStacy Saephanh
February 9, 2007
My school would always spell your name as Foo T. Saephanh. One year, they forgot the space between Foo and T., so your name became 'Foot' Saephanh. Throughout the year I had to explain that no, your name wasn't Foot .. Heheh .. I was glad that year was over. I told you and you laughed your high, joyful laugh ...
A'Kau, thanks for going to my parent-conferences with me, although not everything said was fully understood. Your pride shined through me. Thanks for letting me be the kid I wanted to be, when everyone else wanted me to grow up and be a lady. I guess I didn't realize how much of an anchor you were in my life until I saw you lying in the ER. By the time I arrived, everyone had already given up hope, surrounding you in grief. Me, always the naive and stubborn one, didn't listen. I wanted to talk to the nurses, the ER doc, the Neuro Surgeon and the other Surgeon, to make sure there really was nothing left we could do. When all their answers came back the same .. my world turned upside down, like I had failed ... I didn't realize I was blaming myself for a while. This was my 3rd time trying to process these thoughts into words. Now that I'm progressing .. I don't think I will ever be done saying what I'm trying to say.
You were a scholar by heart and I always wondered what you would be had there been more opportunities for you in your home country. Although Taoist Priest and Head of Village isn't too shabby. You loved music and learning like no other. You were charismatic and proud. You were stern and noble. You taught me so much through your mandarin translations of our history books. It really hit me hard to know we could never again have our discussions and debates on politics, astronomy, religion, our heritage, old stories ... I never got to get you that scooter I've always wanted to surprise you with. Or the Juicer .. I know you loved apple cider.
And Aspen .. or "A'Thee" as you would call her, thinks you are still at the hospital, where she last saw you. I over heard her saying, (holding up her two fingers) "I had two grandpas, now I have one .. The other one flew away to the skies, up where the stars are. He is with the stars now." You bet the hairs behind my neck were sticking straight up. I never told her that. I didn't think she understood what was going on, she just turned Three that Sunday. Maybe she saw it on Dora the Explorer? The Lion King? .. I'm not sure ... but I know she loved you so much. Visiting won't be the same without your music and laughter. But I'm happy she was able to share her earliest memories with you.
We hope that you were as happy as you were here, wherever you are. In the meantime the rest of the fam and I will make sure things go right to ensure your passage to rest your soul. All friends and relatives that came to your ceremony gave their sincere blessings. Sister Muang said she's never seen so many people. Another said the last time he saw so many Mien folk was at our 2002 New Years at Cal Expo. They all had good stories to tell about their relationship with you ... I guess I feel better now, knowing you lived a full life. I don't think I will ever be fully over your passing, but you've left our hearts full of memories. Thank you. It hurts to think about it but I've come to accept that you're no longer here with us .. Like A'Kou, A'Ong and Saeng chien before you, I won't say goodbye because I don't know how to. We will miss you so .. Love always, your third daughter and last child, Faam.
Lai Saeyang
February 6, 2007
What can I say about you uncle?... I never really got the chance to get to know you, or talk to you as much as I would of liked, but from what I remembered, you were very happy, loving, and welcoming everytime I was in your presence.
I'm sad that you had to leave us so early...Where ever you are, I'm sure that you're in a much better place now. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I will miss you (we all will miss you)...
Your niece,
Lai Saeyang
Mevy Saeteurn
February 2, 2007
To my father-inlaw: The day you came to our engagement party was the same day you went to haven. I know that you would have wanted us to get marry. My only regret is that you won't get to see the wedding or my first baby with your son. We needed you here, but I see that God needed you more. We miss you and hope that you are looking down on us.
Kao Saephanh
February 2, 2007
Uncle,
Where do i begin, How do I start?
I often thought to myself, what would I say to you if you were still here. From the stories I've heard and the tales that were told, you were the strength that held the family together. I was there at your bedside when it was time for you to go and I stood there envisioning you reunited with my Grandma and Grandpa, your parents whom you've lost so long ago. Someday I too will join you all in our family's palace of afterlife. I only hope there's a place for me next too you and all our great ancestors too.
Katie Saephanh
February 2, 2007
To my only father I will ever know. You will be missed deeply. I am so blessed to have you walked the aisle when I got married. Meet my husband and all of my children. I am glad to finally get to know you a little better and closer before you had left us with memories of you. We will never forget you and your words of wisdom. The music you played will be pass on to your grand children and their children’s children. May you rest in Peace and watch over us in Heaven.
Love always, Katie, Phi, Caleb, Jezemae and Lex Phong.
Jennaya & Cassie Young
February 1, 2007
We love you so much grandpa and will miss you deeply... You were always there at every visit to greet us with your warmth and smile, you welcomed us into your family with no question and opened your arms and hart to us right away.... You will never be forgotten
Steve & Bonnie Francisco
February 1, 2007
To Lou, Bao Vang, and the Family of Fou Tong Saephanh: We wish to express our sincere condolences on the loss of your loved one.
Bao Vang
February 1, 2007
To my father-in-law: I will miss your welcome and your kind words. You were always so welcoming everytime I visited the family. Lou and I are so sad that you will not get to meet your grandson. But we are happy and blessed that you were able to meet your granddaughter, Isabelle MeyYao. We will keep your spirit alive and tell them what a wonderful grandfather you are. May you rest in peace. Love, Bao, Isabelle Mey Yao Saephanh, and Riley Saeng Waye Saephanh
Lloyd
January 29, 2007
Mister Tom!!!
I'm so sorry to hear of your father's death. Your father, the man who made you the man you are today, will be sorely missed.
I pray you will find peace at his passing and you will continue to be the man he wanted you to be.
Lloyd
Brian Saelee
January 29, 2007
Grandpa I'm going to miss you a lot. You were so out going, I see you every where on your bike or walking around. We're going to miss you smile and laugh. We can't wake up to the sound of your flute anymore. Where you are grandpa just remember you'll be miss and we all love you.
Tom O Saephanh
January 29, 2007
Good bye to my only Dad.
Our memories will live on forever!
Oddly you left us without a word
Desperately gasping for air..
But it was too late.
You're now in Heaven with God.
Everything should be Okay.
Do give us a 'sign' when in danger.
And provide us 'safety' on Earth.
Double happiness is our best wish.
Please read every first letter of each line; 'Good Bye Dad!
Tom (Ou Tong)
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