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Irene J. Backer
1934 - 2021
Irene J. Backer
1934 - 2021
Obituary
Guest Book
BORN
1934
DIED
2021
Irene Backer Obituary
Irene J. Backer (nee Kustra) of Chesterfield, MO, on Feb. 18, 2021. Born on 05-18-34 to Joseph B. and Helen L. (nee Wojciechowski) Kustra. Beloved wife of Donald J. Backer for 62 years; mother of Michele (Ken) Abrams, Mark, Eric, Paul (Valerie Pacer); grandmother of Jason (Christine) Abrams, Luke, Ben, Grace, Owen, Jacob, Lucy; great-grandmother of Callie, Payton, Makayla, Abigail; sister of Darlene A. Kustra. Body donated to science. Celebration of her life to follow end of COVID.
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This obituary is a surprise to most of you.
Irene had dementia. It’s a disease which robs the mind. But it also robs the body, one organ at a time. About 6 months ago, she said “I’ve Lost My Words”. And she could no longer speak as she had been able to do.
Then lost her writing. Then 3 weeks ago she could not walk. That’s when I began to say – “Yesterday I couldn’t spell caregiver – today I are one”.
She went into hospice at Garden View Nursing Home here in Chesterfield 3 weeks before the end. She was in quarantine for what was supposed to be 12 days. Our connection to her was through Zoom.
Eight days into the quarantine she had to go to the Hospital ER because of a medical problem that the Nursing Home couldn’t handle. But when she returned to the Nursing Home, because she had left the building, she had to be retested for COVID and had to restart her quarantine. So we never had a chance to be physically with her. To hold her. To kiss her. That was wrenching.
Anyway, we’d love to hear some “Happy Talk” from you.
Ortmann Stipanovich Funeral Home www.osfuneralhomes.com
16 Entries
Patti Bubash
February 28, 2021
February 26, 2021
Darlene,
I am so sorry about your sister.
With sympathy and friendship,
Patti Bubash
Special School District
Clayton, MO
contact me
Mary Corrello
February 23, 2021
I remember the All Star Game of 1966. Don had tickets for the men of the family. We all met at Don and Irene's house for lunch before the guys went to the game. Just as we sat down for lunch, the electric went out {rolling black outs} which meant the house would get warm without electricity. Irene to the rescue. She said the basement will be cooler so everyone grab their utensils and head for the basement. She was right it was much better in the basement. She was always thinking and planning. She will be missed by all.
Larry & Paulette Moore
February 23, 2021
Paulette and I always enjoyed spending time with you and Irene. She was such a caring and loving lady. She will be missed by so many!
Aileen Moore( Ron's Wife)
February 22, 2021
Donnie and all of your family have my most deepest and sincere sympathy in losing your dear Wife and Mother and Grandmother. All of you are in my thoughts and prayers in this very sad time in your lives.
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Bob Kustra
February 22, 2021
Irene was the first of the grandchildren of Rose Kustra. My father, Uncle Walter to Irene, and my mother, Aunt Loretto, thought Irene "hung the moon" as she was the example for the rest of the grandchildren to follow. They talked often of her beauty and caring manner.
When Don came along, my parents knew the perfect match was made. My heartfelt sympathy goes out to the entire Backer/Kustra family at this sad moment. I know Irene will be missed by all who knew and loved her and I do hope fond memories of her will bring peace and consolation.
I regret I am not in St. Louis and that COVID has changed our ways of honoring loved ones who passed. But I think often of my cousins and will cherish those moments forever. God bless the Backer/Kustra family,
Bob Kustra
February 22, 2021
Bob Geary
February 21, 2021
To the Backer Family- Mrs. Backer was a wonderful person. Many fond memories from our St. Casimir days. Thoughts and prayers to all of you.
Judy Geary
February 21, 2021
I extend my deepest sympathy to the Backer family. Mrs. Backer was such a kind, caring and beautiful person. I have many fond memories of her from our days at St. Casimir’s. I send you many thoughts and prayers.
Richard Pacer
February 21, 2021
Letter writing is now a lost art, but was not to Irene. We really enjoyed the hand-written letters that she sent us from time to time. Her handwriting was superb; she must have gotten an A+ in penmanship. Her letters were informative, and written in her own style of humor. We looked forward to receiving them.
I also remember the excellent dinner parties Irene put on for many of us. She was a superb cook, and very well-organized. Later, she also contributed healthy baked goods to all the wonderful holiday dinners we had at Paul’s and Val’s.
Irene is a beautiful name. It was one of the most popular names given to Polish-American girls born in the first half of the 20th century. (I have several cousins named Irene.). Here’s an interesting bit of trivia: Everyone knows that Marie Sklodowska Curie won the Nobel Prize in both Chemistry and Physics. But few people know that her daughter, IRENE Joliot-Curie (and her husband) won the Nobel Prize in Chemistry in 1935 for the synthesis of new radioactive elements. So Irene is a very special name in science also.
Joyce and I always looked forward to seeing Irene, with her disarming smile, at the holiday gatherings.
We miss her!
Richard Pacer
February 20, 2021
Harold and Carole Adams
February 21, 2021
Dear Don, Harold and I want to extend our deepest sympathy to you and the family. May Our Lord give you peace and comfort.
Carla and Ron Maasen
February 21, 2021
So sorry to hear of your loss. Irene was a wonderful lady who was always so kind and had a sense of humor that I so enjoyed. One morning going into St.Casimir´s Church she pulled a small leaf from my hair. I started to offer an explanation about searching the shrubs for a lost ball that morning for our boys, she just smiled and said it was more fun imagining how it got there.
Our best to your family and know that she and you are in our prayers.
Tom Walther
February 21, 2021
Don, so sorry to learn of the passing of Irene. Though it has been many, many years since we’ve crossed paths at Christian Hospital functions, I just know that given 62 years of marriage, she remained like you. Namely, a very kind and caring person who ensured people were treated the right way. Godspeed!
Joanne Verebelyi
February 20, 2021
Don, Darlene and families, my condolences to you all. With fondness I recall our past family gatherings. May you have happy memories of Irene.
Bill Edwards
February 20, 2021
Although I only had the pleasure of seeing Irene a few times, what has always stayed with me were two endearing thoughts - the truest and sweetest smile that always said "I'm glad to see you" and the love that was truly felt between Don and Irene; you could feel it each time.
Dawn Bucholtz
February 20, 2021
When I become a mother, the first weeks were so rough! The baby had colic, and I couldn’t sleep at all. We only had one car - I was stuck at home. Irene arrived like an angel! She drove me to the doctor and watched the baby so I could finally get some relief. It may have been one of the many things she did for others, something she wouldn’t have even remembered, but for me, in a new town without parents nearby to help, I will never forget how she saved me.
Ken Abrams
February 20, 2021
The world better place since she was here on earth, she was excellent mother and cook
Thomas and Carol Swink
February 19, 2021
Tom and I offer our sympathy and prayers to Don and the family. A recent memory of Irene was to see her face light up when she saw her Abram great grandchildren on Zoom.
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