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Richard C. Varney Sr.
Richard C. Varney Sr.
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Richard Varney Obituary
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Lisa Varney
March 19, 2010
Daddy, we think of you all the time but especially now. We did a toast to you at the St Paddy's block party her on the island. I always speak of you to Taylor and Connor so they will remember you and know you. Like when we watch the History chanel or see the Red Sox, we all say "Grammpy would like that!". We really do miss you lots but you are always here in our hearts. Sometimes in church when I hear a certain song from your mass, it just makes me think of you and I cry. But mostly we all have happy thoughts. BBB LISA, GARY, TAYLOR AND CONNOR
Lisa Varney
December 8, 2009
Hey papa, was thinking of you on your bday. I always think of you when I am around Pearl Harbor, you always wanted to see it. We are all missing you and it's the little things thatt make me think of you and it makes me smile. Mom misses you lots. You are in our hearts and I see bits of you in Taylor and Connor. BBB Lisa
Lisa Varney
June 25, 2009
Dear Dad, I was thinking of you fathers day. Mom is here and in Mass we paryed for all fathers, including you. Miss you lots. Connor always says he thinks you are up there drnking a beer with his other grandfather that he never met. But he imagines you have. BBB Lisa
Lisa Varney
December 6, 2008
Rich,Lisa is away but me and the boys will toast you with a Coors Light tonight at dinner. Happy Birthday! Gary, Taylor and Connor
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Lisa Varney
June 15, 2008
Happy Fathers Day! I usually would be calling you now to tell you that. Sorry I was not there more to say it. But I want you to know I think you were a great dad and I miss you lots. Just to let you know ,Mom is doing good, she misses you too! We talk about you and sometimes we cry and sometimes we laugh. We all have great memories of you. I have your pictures above my computer, so I look at you everyday. Your grandsons are doing well. Connor got straight A's, and Taylor was close. They both played baseball. They miss you too. I tell them about you when I see or hear something that reminds me of you. It would be cool it you were looking down on us. I guess I will have to wait to find out. BBB Lisa
Lisa Varney
May 9, 2008
Dear June,
I was so sorry to hear that Rich had passed on. As difficult as these times are there is also the wonderful memories and the realization that you both have had full lives with relatively good health. The bonus is the beautiful family that carries-on.
These occasions lend themselves to deeper thought about the nature of our lives and how we choose to live them. None of us are privy to the workings of God, but as sure as the sun rises, it sets... and as sure as we're born, our life will come to an end. Yet, regardless of the obvious we tend to live out our lives with a sense of disregard for these realities, typically becoming overly obsessed with pleasure seeking, and living in fear of the unknown...the mysteries that surround us. So these two ideas live in direct contradiction with each other; God's way and our way, and yet there is only one world to live in!
With this in my mind , it serves as a reminder for me to be open minded and tolerant of that which I might not fully understand...the unknown; and to live in full appreciation of the glory that is always around the next bend of the road. Hopefully that brings me closer to "Gods way"!
As was pointed out in the Memory Book by most everyone who checked in, Rich was the embodiment of all that can be called decent and upright. Living his life without harsh attitudes and negativity he served as an example for all of us who strive to live beyond the bounds of our limitations. He will be long remembered by me in this way, and with any luck some of it may even "rub-off", and afford me the same grace which came so easily to him. God Bless You Rich Varney.
The following letter is one that I composed for a few friends and family. It includes some of my travels in the past few years, and I'll send it along to you as well for your amusement or pleasure as the case may be!
I'm currently in Nepal, and not sure when I'll be back in that part of the world but when I am I would like to come for a visit. Our time passes so quickly and family is such an important aspect of who we are, and we haven't had a visit now for quite sometime.
Take good care of yourself June. I have you in my thoughts and prayers.
Love,
Billy
Well you must think I'm terribly rude for taking so long to respond, but in third world countries there are always plenty of excuses for just about everything! I spent most of the past two months in a small village in S. India teaching English to a group of school children. Volunteer work in exchange for room and board. The area is very remote and poor and the living conditions are challenging. Actually that is the case for most of the places I tend to stay in. The environmental degradation here is almost not believable. Air, water and food quality are all very low grade. Some get used to it others don't... I am falling into the latter group. I'm so spoiled having had the benefit of a life in N.H. I often get twangs (is that a word?) of homesickness but for now this is where I am.
Having elucidated the negative, in contrast to that is the richness of the culture and society here. Studying the history of India would be a life long adventure: political, religious, agricultural etc, etc. Right now I'm in the holy city of Varanasi, one of the oldest cities in the world. It is on the banks of the Ganges River in North India. This place is visited by people from all over the world for a variety of reasons. In the guest house where I'm staying ( $1.10 per night) there are people from France, Germany, Chile, Scotland, Japan, New Zealand, and Russia. The variety of reasons they are here include (mostly study) music...Indian flute, tabla(drums) and Sitar which is a stringed instrument. The Japanese guy has been coming yearly for 20 years to study Sanskrit, the ancient holy language of the past. There are also yoga and meditation students as well as Ayurvedic students... this is the traditional holistic medicine of ancient India, many thousands of years old. Beyond this is odd hold-out from the 60's/70's who come for dope smoking!
One of the things Varanasi is famous for is the "Burning Ghats". This is an area on the river where cremations take place in a very public way. It is the honor of ones life to be cremated here and then the ashes cast into the river which sends the body and soul off towards the next life in a favorable way. The orientation that they've adopted in the East towards issues of life and death is very different from that in the West. When I was at the Ghats the other day there were 18 cremations taking place. Each body ceremoniously wrapped in a golden silk shroud and then quite primitively woven onto the pile of logs as if it were just another one. Families, workers, tourists, and the odd cow or two or three wander around as if it were just another day on the planet. There are usually a couple of teenage boys scurrying around the ashes looking for jewelry and gold fillings. So, because of this two-fold emphasis within the city around study and cremations it is proudly said that Varanasi is the city where people come to 'learn and burn'!!!
It is mostly a Hindu city (maybe the most important one) but also home to pilgrims on the Buddhist circuit as well. This is where Buddha gave his first sermon after enlightenment so it is obviously a place of intense Buddhist activity. I just attended a two week seminar that I go to every year that is given by a Tibetan Master. It is about a very specific meditation instruction and practice, also the philosophical basis underpinning it. Quite interesting. The presence of the exiled Tibetan community in India ads immensely to the rich texture that already exists here.
There are about a dozen areas where the Tibetans were given land by the Government back in the 60's, this was after the Communist "Cultural Revolution" that killed about a million Tibetans and sacked most of the monasteries with all of the texts that had been accumulated for for 1000 years of Buddhist practice. They've established significant refugee and monastic communities in a very short period of time. Without question the most extraordinary thing to come of the exodus has been the world wide spread of a formerly secretive religious practice from a geographically isolated part of the world. Tibetan Buddhism is now practiced the all over the world and this has occurred in a very short amount of time.
Although I've spent quite a bit of time in Nepal and India, I've also traveled in S. East Asia. Thailand is a wonderful country that is quite developed so it is easier to travel in than India. A rich tribal heritage in the north, some of the most beautiful beaches in the world in the south, and Bangkok... a vibrant, international city but distinctly Thai.
Laos and Cambodia remain in a state of almost tragic proportions as they continue to recover from the wars of the 70's. Laos is still in the grips of a misplaced "communist" government and Cambodia still feels the wounds of the slaughter that the Khmer Rouge brought upon the country... An estimated 2.5 million people were killed in a country of just 7 or 8 million.
Burma (Myanmar) which was tragically in the news this past year also suffers from a repressive govt. Foreigners are allowed into the country but it is difficult to move around due to the poor infrastructure and the watchful eye of the military, Travel is restricted in those areas where there is persecution, slave labor, and mini-battles with the military. Most of the border regions are in a constant fight with the govt forces and there are refugee camps in Thailand and Bangladesh to serve displaced Burmese. On the flip side of this horrific situation... the Burmese people are the kindest, most truly human beings I've ever encountered. It is humbling to witness the level of humanity that most of these people possess.
I was also in Northern Malaysia for a short period of time but not much to report as I spent the entire time in a hospital with Dengue Fever. This is a mosquito borne viral infection for which there is no vaccination or allopathic cure. The disease must run it's course which takes 7-10 days of intense fever and body pain. Also called break-bone fever for good reason. I was very happy to leave Malaysia!
I'm currently in Nepal and will stay here for the spring months of March April. It is quite like New England at this time of year except for the spectacular backdrop of the Himalaya Mountains. I'm staying in the part of Kathmandu known as Boudha... this is where there are about a half million Tibetans in exile. There have been alot of protests in the past week due to the unrest in Lhasa, Tibet. The Tibetans in Lhasa are trying to bring attention to human rights abuses by China while the run up to the Olympics occurs. Expect to hear more about this as the Olympics approach.
Well, I'll get this off to the P.O. and then continue my move to a new place to stay that is slightly out of town. The air quality there is better than it is here so it's an easy decision to make the move.
I hope this finds you well and happy and that you have successfully survived another winter... I hear it's been a doozy!!! Hellos to everyone.
All the best
Billy
June Varney
March 19, 2010
Rich, it's been 2 years and I miss you but I am doing alright. I see the kids and talk to them all the time and we always talk about you. I know you are watching over all of us. Love you always. June, your lovving wife!
Nanc Renninger
March 17, 2010
DADDY Happy St Patty's Day...We had a green "toast to you tonight, me, Carl, Mom, Sean, Bry, Pam and Gill....and had one for you....as well... We had Sean's birthday too...he loves sharing this day with you.. Mom sends her love, she is going north soon for a few weeks. She misses you lots as we all do. keep the watch going over all of us. I will be thinking of you Friday when I go to the first Yankee game of the year!!! Love you always...Nanc, Mom and Carl.
Rick Varney
March 18, 2010
Hi Dad,
You know I picked the telephone up the other night to tell you that the University of Maine Hockey Team won their quarter-final series against UMass Lowell...against all odds. Then I realized that not only did you already know, but that you also had a hand in helping the "boys in blue" get to the "Garden" for the first time in four years.
There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you or say hello as I drive by St. John Vianney Church. But it's during the moments that we always shared together, that the memories are so vivid that I sometimes forget that I can't just pickup the telephone and talk to you like we did so often before.
I love you Dad and miss you so much. I know that I can't just pickup the phone and call you...even if I do sometimes forget. That would be too easy. Like the rest of the family and all of your friends that love and miss you, I will for now be content to talk to you through my heart until one of these days when we will meet again.
Goodnight Dad. Talk to you tomorrow when I drive by the church.
June
December 8, 2009
Rich, missing you lots on your birthday. Christmas is coming and I am organizing the Family Charity for Autism. I love you very much and keep you in my heart everyday.
December 5, 2009
HAPPY B DAY PAPA!!!!Missed you today when celebrating Nick's 30th birthday, a day you 2 shared for 27 years....He and Nikki are having your 12th grand baby, yep another girl in 12 days....just in time for Christmas. All the others are growing fast, Mom has a good time with them. They are lots of fun...Mom sends her love as do we all. Will check back soon. We love you lots..keep watching over us.....xoxo Nanc and Carl
NANC
June 21, 2009
Wow... 2nd Father's Day without you...already...time does fly, but my memories of you are stronger than ever. I can't tell you how many times in a week, that someone in the family will quote you or remember one of your stories, etc. all of us and all the time. You definitely ate still with ALL of us. Mom is doing wonderful, but you know that. she is something.....Lets see you have 2.5 more great grand babies..up to almost 12.... The redsox still suck, but you know that too...LOL...All the kids are doing petty well, as is Carl..oh yeah...me too. except for the unrelentless heat. OK, well I will check in again soon. I just wanted to honor you on this day, because you are my DAD...my SPECIAL DAD...love you always... and forever, from me, Carl and the kids and their kids ....xoxo
NANC
February 23, 2009
OMG... HEY DAD... CAN'T BELIEVE ITS ALMOST ST PATTY'S DAY..WE WILL CELEBRATE WITH YOU AGAIN THIS YEAR. PRETTY COOL HUH... THE ST PATTY'S DAY PARTY IN YOUR ROOM SHARING THE KILLIANS.... I WILL THINK OF YOU MOST ESPECIALLY THIS ST PATTY'S EVE...HERE'S TO YOU MY IRISH PAPA...LOTS OF IRISH HUGS AND KISSES...NANC
Rick Varney
December 5, 2008
Happy Birthday Dad! How is everything going? The University of Maine football team had a pretty good year. I think they lost in the first round of the playoffs. The hockey team is another story. A young team showing some signs of promise (defeated BC for the first time in seven years on their home ice) but young and very inexperienced. I called Mom today. She is staying at John's until after Christmas. Today is very hard for her. Ann gives sends love. The kids all know it's your birthday. We are struggling daily with each one of them. However, I'm convinced that things would be more difficult if you weren't watching over us. Thank God that we will always have you to draw strengh and comfort from. Simba died a year ago today. Please give him a little pat on the head for me. Thanks. I'll never be able to write how much I love you and miss you. So, instead, I'll just say so long for now Dad. I'll be in touch soon.
Love,
Rick
Rick Varney
November 17, 2008
Hi Dad,
You know this is the first time I've written to you. It just doesn't seem to me that you are really gone. On December 5th, it will be one year since Simba died. I often think about you and Simba together. I know how much you loved dogs and how much Simba loved you. I hope Simba is with you, contently curled up at your feet as you watch over him. All of us. I love you so much Dad. There is so much I wanted to tell you last March. Dad, you are always in my thoughts and in my heart. I will write again soon.
Love,
Rick
Nanc Renninger
June 13, 2008
Hi PaPa Doo. Its fathers day this weekend and I want to tell you I love you and miss you more than ever...especially this weekend. I miss your smile and miss your " hi kid" when I walk into the condo....This just sucks for us...but you are celebrating I know and for that I/we are happy for you...Keep watching over us and keep on letting me know when I am out of line...I love you always...oh yeah and go Yankees.....xxoo Nanc
Roberta Morelli
April 8, 2008
Hi Lisa, I'm so sad for your lost, but this website is so beautiful and represent how your dad was a wonderful person. Please extend my condolences along to all your family. big kiss
Gary & Phyllis Hanscom
April 4, 2008
For Rick, Adam and family. So sorry to hear of your dad and grandfather's passing. You are all in our thoughts and prayers.
Jeannette Chatelain (
April 4, 2008
Jeannette Chatelain (Forest Heights, MD)
Cathy Chute Hall
April 4, 2008
To June and family,
My sympathies in your loss. A gentler man I never met.
Cathy Chute Hall (Dover-Foxcroft, ME)
Mike and Patty Zegowitz
April 4, 2008
Aunt June our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Mike and Patty Zegowitz (Waldorf, MD)
Meg and Harold Walker
April 4, 2008
I am really sorry to hear this. Please let Lisa and the rest of the family know that we are keeping them in our hearts and prayers.
Kindest regards,
Meg & Harold and the Boys
Jim and Sandi Beckett
April 4, 2008
Gary-
Sorry for your loss - please give Lisa a hug from all of the Becketts.
Jim
Aldo and Joyce Mazzadra
April 4, 2008
We are very sorry to hear this news
Please pass our condolenses along to Lisa and her family
Aldo and Joyce
Gem Stafford
April 4, 2008
Lisa,
I can't tell you how sad your news makes me and how my heart is broken for you and your family. I spent time looking at (and crying over!) the wonderful website you created in your dad's memory and am convinced that he was a happy man super proud of all you children.
Please know that Martino and I are thinking of you all and wish there was a way to send you a huge, healing hug via email.
Gem and Martino.
John McGrath
April 4, 2008
Lisa
Thank you for sharing that. What a beautiful web site! I'll miss ole Rich. He really epitimized the 'Greatest Generation'.
Love
John
John McGrath
Wayne Cahoon
April 4, 2008
Lisa,
Sorry to here about your dad. Kim and I will keep you and your family in our prayers.
Teri and Rick Woodcock
April 4, 2008
Dear Lisa,
I am so very sorry to hear about your dad. The website was beautiful and a great way to celebrate him. I loved the picture of you, your brothers and parents. It is a great picture. You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers.
Teri
Cinzia Scavuzzo
April 4, 2008
Dear Lisa,
I'm really sorry to hear your sad news and am with you in this terrible time for you and your family. My deepest sympathy.
Love
Cinzia
Roberta Lazio
April 4, 2008
Hi Lisa, there is a lot of time that I don't write to you, I'm so sorry for this, cause I miss you Gary and the boys so much.
My father says me about your father, I'm so said for you, I haven't words to say about this, but I think about you, Heartfelt condolences I don't know if I had used the correct words. I hope to see you soon in a better moment.
Big hugs
Roberta
Fran and Mike Betson
April 4, 2008
Hi Lisa, Gary & Family,
We are so sorry to hear about your father. Our thoughts and prayers are with your family at this time.
Please tell your mom and family we are praying for them.
God Bless You.
Love,
Fran & Mike
Jackie McCann
April 4, 2008
Dear Lisa,
I so sorry to hear about your dad. I cannot find words to express how sorry I really am. In a strange twist of fate your dad passed away on the same day as mine. I have searched and searched for an appropriate quote or some words that express my sympathies. What I found was a quote from Teddy Roosevelt that was read at my dad's funeral at his request:
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doers of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena; whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cuase; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement; and who at the worst, if he fails, at least while daring greatly; so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neihter victory nor defeat."
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, especially today.
My love and sympathies to all,
Jackie
Pastor Robert Donovan
April 4, 2008
Dear June, Ricky, Nancy, John, Lisa and families,
The Easter baskets have been put away for next year and my bet is the candy is all gone as well. But the fact remains for us that Easter never gets puts away. It is the clarion of our life as Jesus people. When the priest or pastor stands before the assembled faithful on Easter day
and declares "He is Risen!" our echo "He is Risen indeed!" simply confirms what we all know in our hearts; God´s life is eternal and those who believe in Him live with Him.
In the twisted way we try to place events in the timeline of our life I was happy that when Uncle Rich heard the call to come home Easter was around the corner. It gave me comfort that in this family where faith is the constant expression of God´s love, God´s words of comfort would be
heard.
It is funny in a way - funny odd - that when Mom told me of Uncle Rich´s passing I wasn´t immediately sad. This bothered me at first and then in reflecting I remembered a time may years ago. I was a student in college at UNH and one of my parents called to tell me that Uncle Rich was in the hospital and would have heart surgery. I don´t remember if the cause for the surgery was a heart attack but I remember getting off the phone and sitting at my desk, reaching for a cigarette, and feeling incredibly sad. It was more fear than sadness I guess.
In the moments that followed I traveled back in time to visiting you all in Bangor. The house in Brewer, camping on the lot line with the neighbor, Billy I think his name was. I remember visiting Grammy and wrestling with John on the plastic covered sofa. The swimming pool, the family
room, even a lake memory from early on were all accessed. And Uncle Rich was the constant. His quiet demeanor that fooled you into thinking he wasn´t in charge, His warmth and low key approach that put you at ease. His skill at building things that I admired more when I got older
and tried myself with little success. My memory is that Uncle Rich made life look easy. That was over 30 years ago I think. Fortunately, you and the rest of us got a lot more life with him than if those moments of fear turned to grief. I was particularly pleased that June, Rich, Mom, and Dad got to travel together. The idea that 2 sisters and 2 brothers-in-law could be best friends is a diminishing opportunity in the mobile and disconnected world we live in. But as children of the four of them we are all better off for their friendship. I guess what I am trying to say is that I grieved for Uncle Rich 30 years ago when I faced the idea that he may leave us. So the news that heaven opened at Easter to receive him just didn´t feel so bad.
There is another part of this I have to confess. In 1992 when Jennifer and I prepared to change our life dramatically and go to Seminary, June, you and Rich understood why better than any other family member, Your support and love to send us on this journey that has been the greatest blessing in my life is in my prayers every day.
I have never said this before to anyone but I honestly believe that your faith and commitment to Christ through your life and devotion probably affected me greater than I could ever realize. In a world that is filled with a lot of hypocrisy, you and Uncle Rich simply lived your faith in a way that spoke gently to my spirit from early in my life. If God has a way of getting us in the end, he
began his grab on my life through you when I was very young.
Uncle Rich was a big part of my Holy Week this year. On Good Friday as I preached about the power of God to come to earth for us, to pay the price for all of our brokenness, he was perched on the edge of my mind - just sitting there as the visual reminder that the cross is
necessary. It is only by the grace of God to take upon himself all of our failings (even Uncle Rich´s who it must seem to you from my reflection didn´t have any! although we all do) that we can endure the darkness of friday and hope for Easter. When I turned to the congregation on Sunday morning with 700 people cramming every corner
of St. James and announced He is Risen! I smiled my tears into joy as the echo seemed to say Uncle Rich is risen indeed!
Thank you for letting me ramble. I am sorry that I am unable to be with you in Bangor or FortMyers, but I know you understand. Please feel welcome to visit in Chicago any time; we have lots of room and I would live to have you stay with us. I love you all very much and am thankful that God gave us all so many years of Uncle Rich and
so many memories of what life looks like. May you all live in the days ahead with the faith and confidence that Uncle Rich is alive and we will see him again, thanks be to God.
Love,
Bobby
John 20:31
John Varney
March 31, 2008
Eulogy 3-29-2008
On behalf of my family and father I would like to thank everyone who is able to be here today. I would also like to thank those who couldn´t be here but from whom we have heard over the last couple of weeks. Their condolences and so many kind words and thoughts about my father have been a source of strength and comfort to me and my family.
I am sure my father is looking down right now and thinking in his shy and unassuming way "what the hell is all this fuss about"? And while he might be a little uncomfortable with all the attention he would be truly humbled and deeply gratified by the expressions of love from his family and friends.
We are here today to say good bye in an earthly sense to a wonderful and loving husband, brother, father, father-in-la w, grand father, great grand father, uncle and friend. But more importantly we are here, as he would want, to celebrate his life.
My father was blessed with a long, full and satisfying life. He recalled often his childhood and growing up with his family with great fondness. He was one of five children born to my Grand parents. I did not know them well, but I recall Nana being described as an "angel", loving and nurturing, and Pa, as my father would affectionately refer to him, as a bit of a "rascal". Judging from the way my father turned out, I think the descriptions were accurate. He had the good fortune of having loving parents.
At age 18, after being turned down for the draft because of his hearing disability, he went to work at eastern fine paper where he worked for the next 42 years. I never heard him complain about going to work or his job. At the Eastern, he met a group of buddies that would become life long friends. They were avid hunters and fishermen who passed their weekends on Moosehead Lake and Branch Pond.
At the age of 26, he got hitched to the woman that he would spend the rest of his life with, together devoted to building and providing for the family he leaves behind - 4 children, 15 grand children and 8 great grandchildren.
For the next 34 years his life was his family. He had turned the page and he put his days of hunting and fishing behind him. During the early years he worked two jobs. In addition to working at the Eastern, he was a janitor at WLBZ at night and on the weekends.
When work permitted, he attended, often unnoticed, the games and events his children played. While we were not particularly good athletes, he was always proud of us.
Throughout these years his only self indulgence was his love of woodworking. His workshop was his sanctuary where he enjoyed working with his hands and listening to the old swing band era music on the reel-to-reel tapes he got at WLBZ. He was a perfectionist at his craft. The home and camps we grew up in had his finger prints all over them.
Once his children got older, he took up the game of golf learning to play as a lefty on a set of right handed clubs. His temperament and easy disposition served him well learning this mentally challenging and frustrating game. And while he was competitive about playing and would occasionally get down on himself as his physical abilities diminished, like so many other things in his life he kept it all in perspective. It was just fun playing a round of golf with the boys. He had the good fortune to play regularly into his early eighties.
At the age of 59, my father was able to retire. In the years that followed he traveled to Germany, Austria, Ireland, Italy, Spain, Mexico, and Brazil.
As much as it pains me to say as a Yankee fan, my father was able to enjoy the Red Sox winning not one but two World Series in his life time. Amazing!
Finally and most importantly, my father was truly blessed in finding his soul mate in my mother. They forged a true partnership to build a beautiful family and the life they had together. They worked and sacrificed for a common shared purpose. Anyone who knows them well knows they were the perfect compliment for each other. While Nana nurtured and protected my father from his hearing disability and the effects of it, my mother encouraged, pushed and challenged him to over come it. With her support he grew and experienced life in ways he would not have with out her. Their devotion to each other was strong, but her devotion to him was never more evident then in the final months of his life.
When I reflect back on my father´s life, however, what strikes me the most and makes an indelible impression upon me is the way in which he lived his life. My father was genuine, soft spoken, unassuming and without an ego. He was a profoundly humble man with a great heart. He was respectful and a gentleman that was always sensitive to the needs and feelings of others. I can´t recall ever hearing my father speak ill of anyone with the exception of any team that played and beat Notre Damn or the University of Maine. He just didn´t have a mean bone in his body.
My father also had a terrific sense of humor and a great capacity for laughter. His laugh and smile were pure and intoxicating. He could laugh as easy and equally at the prank he would pull on you or something you did or the human condition as he could and often did about himself. As shy as he was in crowds, he loved telling jokes.
One trait that may not have been obvious to those who did not know him well was the inner strength he possessed. We witnessed it over the years in how he dealt with the medical and physical adversities he faced as well as the other challenges in his life. He was always calm and at peace with himself and the conditions. Over the last year or so I think my father knew and understood that his body was breaking down and slowly giving way. Yet, he never showed fear or regret. It was his inner strength that helped him accept it.
These traits and attributes were evident in and on display in that sweet wonderful disposition that he had. It was his disposition and warm smile that endeared him to family, friends and to those who spent time with him. 12 years ago my father and mother spent 3 weeks in Brazil with my wife´s family. Because of the language barrier communication was difficult, but it didn´t matter. My father developed a strong bond with my father-in-law and the rest of my wife´s family. Last week when my father passed away, his Brazilian family grieved, not for my loss but for the loss they felt. It is a tribute to the loving people that they are but also to the impact my father´s way had on people.
We should take comfort that he continues to live in our hearts but also in the family he left behind.
I look around and see his mischievous way and penchant for teasing those he loved in my daughter Anne, my son John-Lucas and my nephews Nick and Connor.
I see his undying loyalty to the teams he followed in my brother Rick and my nephew Adam in the way they prepare for the worst and hope for the best while watching theirs teams from the edge of their seats.
I see his creative talents and clever touch in my sisters Nancy and Lisa. I see his carefree way in one and his famous sore headedness when his team would lose in the other.
I see his gentle spirit and unassuming way in my nephews Sean, Colin and Sammy. I see his kind heart and sensitivity for others in my daughter Isabella, my niece Katie and my nephews Joshua and Taylor.
I credit my own love of woodworking and sense of humor in my father.
Dad, I hope when you reflect back on your life on earth with us you do so with pride and a sense of accomplishment. I know it is not in your nature or your way, but you lived a life that mattered and that made a difference, yours was simply a life well lived, a life dedicated to family. Congratulations. I could not be more proud of you or thank you enough for all that you were and are.
Billy Donovan
March 31, 2008
So sorry to hear of "Uncle Rich's" passing. Although years have lapsed since we last had a visit, there are a treasury of memories to live with... summer vacations on the lake in Maine, on the homefront in Brewer, or treking through the snowy underbrush at Wilfred's and Dot's looking for the perfect Christmas tree!
Rich was practical, centered, and behind the easy silence was a voice of gentle wisdom which was held in high regard by all. When Rich spoke people listened. Perhaps it's that gentleness that I'll remember the most... or maybe it will be the morning that he taught me to put peanut butter on my toast; an indulgence that I enjoy to this day!
Thank-you Uncle Rich for all that you brought into the world for us to share in, and for all that you leave behind for us to remember and reflect upon.
My Love to June and all the cousins,
Billy Donovan Kathmandu, Nepal
harvey shultz
March 30, 2008
I remember Rich only from Lisa's wedding, and what a fine chap he was. Just before he passed, Lisa recapped her father's life to me and Olga Cavaliere in Spain. It's obvious now to someone who only knew Rich a little but who knows Lisa well that her father was a big part of the reason Lisa turned out the way she did: responsible, successful, generous, open, incredibly loving and giving to her family and friends. It is perhaps the most important part of Rich's legacy that the sweet fruit fell next to the tree.
Mike Myatt
March 30, 2008
Rich's life can be best measured by his wonderful family. He and June raised four great children who loved him dearly and they and their children will become his greatest legacy.He was my freind and Red Sox ally. I know John will secretly now always root for the Sox and keep his tools in great working order. Moe and I send our love to June, Rick, Nancy, John and Lisa, as well as their families now during this time and beyond.
Mike Donovan
March 28, 2008
It was so nice to be able to view the photographs of Uncle Rich and read of the loving memories from family and relatives. I will remember Uncle Rich in much the same way as many of you. I would also like to add some thoughts from the times I spent with him thru the years, mostly on holidays and summer vacations. Rich also had a very competitive and gregarious side that I always found as an interesting part of his personality because he wouldn't display these traits openly but was always looking for little ways to 'win a bet' (golf, baseball, basketball) or to get one over on us as kids. It was this boyish side of him that I remember best! My condolences to to all of his loved ones and to my Aunt June and cousins. Love Mike
Annette and Bob Donovan
March 26, 2008
"Happiness is found in the journeying, not at the end of the
road." In our journey with Richard we have shared many
laughs, tears and shared moments not to be forgotten.These
memories will stay with us forever and we are so happy that
we were able to take this journey with Richard and his
family. Bob and Annette Donovan
Dianne Boucher
March 26, 2008
The joy of Christmas Day with Rich and June and the Damaschis at our house when the boys were little...the celebration of Brenda and Keri's high school graduations at Mullica Hill...these are my memories of the gracious Mr.Varney, culminating in being with Lisa and her family in Spain when Mr.Varney died. In her profound grief, Lisa still found a way to welcome us and to focus on celebrating her Dad's life. Only an extraordinary man could have fathered such a daughter.
Jim Davies
March 25, 2008
Being Bangor born and a neighbor, I've always felt a kinship to John and his mom and dad.(June don't care much for my maine humor)Rich was proud of his children, always told me so.Hope he forgives me for the haircut.
What good his life built. God Bless.
Connor Damaschi
March 25, 2008
I never knew my grandather as much as I wish I had. Which is sad. I am sure he would have been a great grandfather if I had known him better. I hope God welcomes him into heaven and that he has a good time.I hope he looks down upon us all.
Connor
Luzia Zouain Varney
March 25, 2008
Richard made me feel so welcome the moment we met. It was something about him, like an angel, his presence would make a person feel comfortable and happy; he lit up the room. This summer our home will not be the same without him. But I know this angel that we all had once beside us is now above watching over us, especially his eternal bride that he loved so dearly. Richard you were a special man. I will miss you immensely....Forever in my heart.
Luzia Zouain Varney
Bryanna Renninger
March 25, 2008
My Grampie was such a wonderful man. He was so well liked by everyone he came in contact with, right up to his last night here. I stayed with him that whole night, with my mom and Uncle John. As hard as it was, I wouldn't trade it for anything, that last extra time with him. I know he could feel us watching over him, and I know he is now watching over all of us.
Grampa I miss you so much, and I will always remember your trademark "ear wiggle" and grin. I'll miss you always. You may be gone from sight, but your memory will last forever in my heart.
God saw you getting tired,
a cure was not to be.
So he put his arms around you
and whispered "Come to me".
With tearful eyes we watched, and saw you pass away.
Although we loved you dearly, we could not make you stay.
A golden heart stopped beating, hard working hands at rest.
God broke our hearts to prove, he only takes the best.
I love you Grampie!
Love, Bry
Brenda Damaschi
March 24, 2008
It's taken me a week to sign this mainly because I've been trying to find the perfect words to describe someone so perfect. In reality there aren't any words special enough to describe my grandpa. Grandpa Rich was a truly wonderful and unique man. He was never one to say a negative word about anyone, and I don't believe you'd be able to find someone who would say a negative word about him. He was always content in whatever he was doing, was sweet and funny, and could always make me laugh. I will never forget all of the wonderful memories I have of him! I love you Grandpa Rich and will miss you always!!!!
Dolly Cahoon
March 24, 2008
It hardly seems like fifty three years ago that I first met Richie, as the new bride of Ernie Cahoon. It soon became evident that he had talent for tackling complex projects, such as building a beautiful family home in Brewer, ME. I can't help but agree with many of the accolades attributed to him. He carried those wonderful traits throughout his life as many family and friends have expressed. His politeness was ingrained into his character and often came thru along with a shy grin. In later years with those beautiful blue eyes and full head of white hair, he became a Phil Donahue look-a-like! God Bless you Richie.
Dolly Cahoon (Sister-in-Law)
Ernie Cahoon
March 24, 2008
Despite six years difference in our ages, Riche provided me with happy memories, such as fishing at Branch Pond. Or the time he lent me his bike, when I was ten or eleven years old. It was a challenge going up hill on Cedar Street until I reached 5th Street. Then coasting downhill, at the edge of Cedar Street, to Third Street,was exciting, until I hit a sewer grate, flipping the bike head over heels. With visible scrapes and bruises, I meekly returned the bike, but Richie never said a word about the damage to his bike. In recent years we've reminisced about many of those adventures. Thanks Richie.
Ernie Cahoon (Brother-in-law)
Angie Cellini
March 23, 2008
Dear Lisa,Sorry to hear about your father. My condolences
your mother and family.
Love, Mrs C
JUNE VARNEY
March 23, 2008
A Special Goodbye...There are many happy moments in my life, but the happiest moments of all were when we became parents each time. They were indescribable. I could go on and on until eternity, but I prefer that our special moments together remain "our own". They will always be ours. Today at Easter mass, you were close to my heart, and you will remain there for all eternity.
Love June
March 22, 2008
A round of golf, couple of Coors Lights and those stinkin' Red Sox knocking off the Yankees, a great smile, and his belly laugh, just a couple of little memories of Rich. I didn't call him Dad, but he felt like a dad. He was modest and sincere, a great husband, father and grandfather and in-law.
Rich you were a special person to all of us, I know you'll still hear June calling your name, hope you will hear all of us as well. We'll keep a Coors Light on ice and think of you often. Thanks for making me feel part of your family.
Love Gary
Keri Damaschi
March 21, 2008
I have so many wonderful memories of Grandpa. One of my favorites was when I made him a card when I was little and I called him "Richie Boy." He laughed and wanted to know how many people know about the "special" nickname! Then on my last trip to Florida I took him to the barber to get a hair cut, and when he was done he wanted to know if he looked good enough to impress his lady! I'll miss ya Grampa!
John McGrath
March 21, 2008
Rich,
I met you for the first time on one of your trips to Naples, Italy to visit Gary, Lisa, Taylor and Connor. From the minute we met, I could tell you were a very warm, loving person. You were gentle, kind and had a bit of humor/devilish side to you. Even though I did not know much about the Red Sox, I enjoyed talking to you, because it made me feel very relaxed. You had a way about you that made us feel very warm and loved; just like family!
I'll miss you!
John McGrath and Family
Lisa Varney Damaschi
March 21, 2008
If you knew my dad....
... you would first know that he loved his wife of 58 years, "June-Bug" very much. I will forever hear "Where's your mother?" and in his last few days he always asked for her.
....you would know that he was a great dad, grandpa and great grandpa. I will forever remember him quietly watching me play basketball at that small John Bapst gym or any other endeavor I would try.
....you would know that he appeared quiet, shy and introverted but had a great sense of humor and liked to play jokes on people. I will forever remember when he secretly taped my Great Aunt Rose and cousin Geneva at Thanksgiving arguing over the "white meat"!
....you would know that he overcame many obstacles in his life including hearing loss at a very young age, having open heart surgery for a new heart valve, and having to golf right-handed when he was left handed. I will forever remember the click click of his heart valve when he was near.
....you would know that he loved to play the links. I will forever remember going with him to "Brownies" to hit balls and him letting me run out to gather all the golf balls he had hit.
....you would know that he was a handyman and craftsmen. I will forever remember helping him in his workshop, holding the wood while he made the cut and the smell of the freshly sawed wood.
....you would know that he was happy and satisfied with his life and dealt with whatever came his way. I will forever remember that he got up early every morning for 42 years to goto work and never complained. And at 3:00 when he got home he would sit in his green chair and have 1 beer, eat his cheez-its and watch the news.
....you would know that he not only built our house and camps, but our lives. I will forever remember our times at 36 Birchwood Blvd. and Lucerne Lake.
....you would know that he will be deeply missed by his family, friends and even new aquantances. I will always remember every nurse that helped him thought he was such a "cutie".
..... you would know that he will be deeply missed by me! Beep Beep Beep from your daughter Lisa
Jon Tucker
March 20, 2008
Rich was a very nice person with a gentle soul. I enjoyed the short time I knew him. During those years, I always cherished him as a very kind and supportive father-in-law. I´m glad that my sons had almost 30 years of time together. I imagine that he´s enjoying a pint at a fine Irish pub right now. God bless you Rich.
Christine Tucker
March 20, 2008
I only knew Richard Varney for 4 years just after I met his grandson Adam Tucker. From day one the whole family accepted me as their own which was a great feeling since my own family is very small. In the last year, Adam and I took Grampa Rich to the doctors and other assorted adventures and we were able to see him at least once a week which I am so happy we were able to do. I cherish the times we got to spend with him. Richard Varney reminded me of my father, he wouldn´t hurt a fly. Rich was one of the very few men that was just an all-around perfect individual of society. He was a great Father, Grandfather (grandfather in law to me), Friend and Husband. More men should be like Richard Varney. I will always love and miss Grampa Rich.
Nicholas Tucker
March 20, 2008
A truly exceptional man has left us, and for that I am deeply saddened. I will miss my grandpa more than I can say and will never forget the many wonderful memories we shared. I'll never forget his kind smile and mischevious smirks. My mom always told me I got my blue eyes from him, and that always made me very proud to be anything like the man he was. We celebrated our birthdays together for the past 28 years of my life. For that I am very grateful. It won't be the same without him this year. I'll never forget the summers at the lake house....going for boat rides (grandpa let us drive), picking wild blue berries on the lake islands, swimming from the dock, and trying to figure out how grandpa was able to take his thumb off his hand and put it back on again. I'll never forget grandpa and I driving the golf cart to the pool and taking the long way home. He knew we kids loved that golf cart. I'll never forget any of the great memories I have of him and with that said I'll leave him with an old Irish blessing.
May the road rise up to meet you
May the wind be always at your back
May the sun shine warm upon your face
and rains fall soft upon your fields
And until we meet again
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
I love you grandpa and look forward to the day we are together again.
Nicholas Robert Tucker
Carl Renninger
March 20, 2008
The memories I have of Rich and that will be with me always are too many to put into words on paper. The things that I learned from this great man only he and I know. Our secret forever! The fun I was able to have was the kind of fun you only experience with some that loves it as much as yourself.
I can share fun experience of some time ago. At one of the family gatherings in Maine some time ago, Rich was trying to get me to do a double front flip off the board. Up for the challenge I gave it a try. Didn´t make it at all! I´d say one and a quarter at best. Gasping for breath after smashing my face on the water Rich just laughed and encouraged me to try again. Stupid as I can be I did. Same deal as the first only a much harder laugh from Rich. Long story short, he got me to do this until I just couldn´t stand up any longer. I never did do it but it was the most fun I ever had being laughed at.
To be fair I can also share one of the things I learned that is no secret. The art of BBQ chicken. After watching his techniques in the perfect chicken I have spent years trying to perfect my own. I´m not sure how long ago it was maybe two years ago Rich told me that not only did I have it down but for the first time mine was better than his. This is a compliment that will stick with me for the rest of my life.
Rich you will be deeply missed by me for ever and ever and I can only look forward to being with you again when my time here is complete. I only hope that I can come close to the man you were here and are where you are now.
The son in law
Carl L Renninger
Nanc Renninger
March 20, 2008
My Dad was special!! He was soft spoken ( except when we pushed him over the edge), gentle and kind. I can´t remember a time when he spoke a bad word about another. Don´t get me wrong, he had an Irish temper like the rest of us, but he rarely showed that side. In his later years he was blessed with lots and lots of grand kids and great grand kids and enjoyed them each of them in different ways. He loved his babies.
I really just wanted the family to know that he felt the LOVE from all of you in his final hours. They say when your time has come, that your senses are sharpened. His little grin reflected his inner peace. I have never witnessed such a serene and beautiful moment as that, equating it to the birth of my children. There really is a fine line between the beginning and the end of life, both intensely emotional and beautiful. My Dad is truly happy and at peace and that feeling I will always carry in my heart,...Love you Papa......Nanc
Taylor Damaschi
March 20, 2008
I didn't get to know you that good but i know that you were a wonderful man starting from the day you were born to the day you died. I have had wonderful experiences with you will always remember you as a wonderful grandfather and also a wonderful person and golfer. See you in Heaven!
Michael Zouain
March 19, 2008
Because of our language differences (I speak Portuguese) we could not communicate so well without a translator. But in trying to get to know each other, we had a great time with unforgettable memories filled with laughter. You do not need to understand words to recognize a man with a great heart. Richard had a glow above his head. I am lucky to have known such a man. For me, Richard was my oldest brother and today I lost my brother. I will miss you Richard. Go in peace my friend - my brother.
Michael Zouain (Luzia Varney's Dad)
Marilyn Lawrence
March 19, 2008
I never met Mr. Varney but I know his wonderful daughter Nancy. If he was anything like Nanc, he was a true gem.
Adam Tucker
March 18, 2008
My grandfather was a very special man. They don't make men like Gramps anymore. I can not think of anyone more humble, respectful, loving, caring, and genuine as he. He was certainly the best of what a true Irishman represents and what we should all aspire to be like. He was and still is my role model of the kind of husband and father I want to be.
I will be forever grateful for the nearly 30 years that I was able to know him, the special relationship and bond he had with Christine, and the precious moments he had with Caleb that I will never forget. Caleb and Grampa used to make me laugh with the different faces they would make at each other as well as the kisses and hugs they always gave each other....Gramps even let Caleb sneak a sip of his beer on the rare occasion...he couldn't let his Irish great-grandson go thirsty!
I have several fond memories of Grampa. He was the one who showed me how to properly hold a golf club. I will never forget when I helped him redo to deck at 36 Birchwood...I must have only been 10 years old. I also remember how he used to pay me an allowance for taking care of Hannah...he would sneak it to me behind Gramma's back! I am also very grateful he was able to make it to Caleb's baptism and I will never forget that as well.
I will always miss and admire Grampa very much so. One of my reasons for moving to New England was for Grampa. I never really spoke of it, except to a select few, but I wanted to move here before Grampa passed away so that he would know that my generation still cared about this great part of the country. Even more important to me however, Grampa died knowing that his grandson, grand-daughter in-law, and great-grandson will be moving to his beloved state of Maine this June. I am sure it brought a smile to his face.
Good bye Grampa and I love you. Thank you for the memories, your love, and the time you gave us.
Cheers, Adam Tucker
Grandpa with Twins - (1996)
March 20, 2008
40th Wedding Anniversayr
March 20, 2008
Retirement
March 20, 2008
June and Rich - Hitched! - (Mar 18 200)
March 18, 2008
RIch the "Groom" - (Mar 18 200)
March 18, 2008
Going out with June - (Mar 18 200)
March 18, 2008
Hanging Out with His Cronies - (Mar 18 200)
March 18, 2008
Childhood - (Mar 18 200)
March 18, 2008
Last Family Pictures
March 18, 2008
Nothing like a good shave
March 18, 2008
Last Kisses
March 18, 2008
Our Last Family Portrait
March 18, 2008
Rich & Betzy(John's friend)@ a party dancing.
March 26, 2008
Christmas '06
March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
March 24, 2008
DAD, ETHAN, LYNN - (2004) - DADS 80TH B'DAY
March 22, 2008
NICK,NIKKI, DAD PARTYING - (2003)
March 22, 2008
FAMILY PHOTO - (2000) - 50TH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY
March 22, 2008
5O TH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY
March 22, 2008
PARTY GUY - (1980)
March 22, 2008
DAD - (1946)
March 22, 2008
DAD - (1945)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1976) - father and daughter
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1976) - father and daughter
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1999) - Enjoying the beer.
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1999)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1996)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1996)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1996)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1985) - Grampa and the boys.
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1985)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1987)
March 22, 2008
Grampa - (1990)
March 22, 2008
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