Carolyn Shafer

Carolyn Shafer: Nov. 28, 1930 - Jan. 6, 2026
Born to Eternal Life on Jan. 6, 2026, age 95. Beloved wife to the late Nelson Shafer (d. 2019). Loving mother of Scott (Linda) Shafer and the late Randy Shafer (d. 2010). Dear grandmother of Dan (Katie), Kelly and Tommy Shafer. Great grandmother of Ada and Isla Shafer. Sister-in-law of Roger Shelton. Preceded in death by Marolyn Shelton (nee Underwood, d. 2023). Survived by many more relatives and friends.
Born Carolyn Underwood, she was the daughter of Thomas Luby Underwood and Margie Bohanon. Her twin sister and only sibling, Marolyn, was born hours after her, on Nov. 29, both in Eddyville, Kentucky. In the late 1930s, the family moved to Madisonville, Kentucky, where the Underwoods lived for many years, and where Carolyn attended school.
In 1955, she met Nelson Shafer, who was stationed in Kentucky while serving in the U.S. Army. They were married in 1956. Nelson and Carolyn became parents in 1958 when their oldest son, Scott, was born in Kentucky. Their younger son, Randy, was born in Illinois in 1960.
After marrying, Nelson and Carolyn moved to London, Kentucky, and later to Lexington, where Nelson attended law school at the University of Kentucky. They later moved to the Chicago area, where they raised Scott and Randy in Park Forest, Illinois. In 1974, they moved to Wauwatosa, Wisconsin, where they lived for more than 20 years.
Nelson and Carolyn retired to Florida in 1997, where they welcomed their children and grandchildren for many visits. In 2006, they took their whole family on a cruise to the Caribbean to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. They returned to southeastern Wisconsin in 2008 following Nelson's diagnosis with Parkinson's disease, living in various locations in Menomonee Falls and Brookfield. Carolyn's final place of residence was at Vista Pointe Assisted Living Center in Menomonee Falls.
Carolyn was a mother who deeply loved her sons. She enjoyed raising her children, keeping their home, and attending her sons' sporting events - never missing a game. When the boys had games happening simultaneously in different locations, Nelson and Carolyn would switch places mid-game to make sure to see both. Carolyn was very close with her daughter-in-law, Linda, who cared for her a great deal and was someone Carolyn held in high regard.
Known as "Gran" to her grandchildren and great grandchildren, Carolyn was a proud grandmother to Dan, Kelly and Tommy, and was close with the three of them throughout her life. In their younger years, she enjoyed spending time with them and having them over to their Wauwatosa home and later to their home in Hudson, Florida. In 2014, Dan married his now-wife Katie, and Carolyn always treated her as if she was one of her own.
Carolyn greatly enjoyed visits with her great granddaughters, Ada and Isla, and treasured her time with them. In later years, her living space featured a great many photos of the girls, and she would talk about them often.
Carolyn was very close with her sister, Marolyn; they spoke by phone nearly every day. She was also close with Marolyn's son, Stuart, who lived with Nelson and Carolyn for a time after he graduated high school. Stuart and his wife Lori were close with Carolyn until her death, helping care for her in later years.
While living in the Milwaukee area, Nelson and Carolyn attended United Methodist Church in Elm Grove, Wisconsin, where they were active in the congregation. She had a charitable heart, volunteering at local hospitals and delivering Meals on Wheels, and seeking to help those in need, especially children or veterans.
Carolyn was a homemaker for much of her life, but after her sons graduated high school, Carolyn got a job in an administrative role at Joe Dellosso Brokerage, which represented national food and candy companies in Wisconsin.
She was known for her remarkable sense of humor. She'd laugh and go along with Nelson's jokes - and make plenty of her own, too. She enjoyed entertaining and bringing people together.
Carolyn was unfailingly honest, and she always spoke her mind. She was passionate, she was genuine, and she cared about others. She was a good friend to many who benefitted from her listening ear and understanding heart. She provided comfort and encouragement when others were struggling with life's hardships, drawing on her own resiliency. Even though she spent her last 65+ years outside of Kentucky, she never lost her southern accent. At every turn, she was herself.
Her passionate spirit, her honest and genuine nature, and her big heart will carry on and be remembered through generations. She will be greatly missed.
Memorial Service will be held at the funeral home on Saturday, January 17 at 10 AM. Interment to follow at Wisconsin Memorial Park.