Gunnar Wikstrom Jr.

My thoughts drifted back to the past and the name Gunnar Wikstrom floated to my mind.I feel lucky to have found this tribute page to him.

I attended Buena Vista College in the early 80's. I never had Dr. Wikstrom as a professor but I had the priviledge of sharing with him the adventure of going on an exchange program to Taiwan from July to Dec. 1981. Along with another college student I shared lodging with him for about 3 months at a rooming house in Taipei.I remember Dr. Wikstrom as a kind, gentle man who tolerated the more boisterous antics of myself and our college roommate. I remember periodic conversations. He was a steadying presence in the swirling, eye-opening experiences of my time there.I remember his smile. God Bless you Gunnar. Thanks for sharing with me some of your time on this planet

My name is Elias Larsson and I met Mr Wikstrom (yes I know, he´d probably say "oh, that´s very polite of you, but please, call me Gunnar. Just like you would back in Sweden") for the first time in a parkinglot in Minneapolis in 2003.
My gospelchoir had just arrived to the Twin Cities and the American-Swedish Institute. There we would meet our hosts for the next two weeks. Me and my freind Mikael were to go with Gunnar and in his Saturn he told us that his house
-Didn´t have a womans touch.
Being a swede I tried to be diplomatic and answered
-Well, we´re not women so that´s ok.
In 2005 I had the honor to drive the American-Swedish Institute Male Chorus on their bustour to Norway from Sweden and I got to meet Gunnar again for a about a week. We kept in touch trough e-mail and a few phonecalls during the years, so when my gospelchoir wnet back this May I had two reasons to go along. First because I love Minnesota and the people there, but also to meet Gunnar again, perheps for the very last time.
When I got our schedule I realised that going to Gunnar wouldn´t be easy.
But the last day I thought, now I HAVE to go visit him. I have a hard time meeting and talking to people that know they don´t have much time left in life. I checked out how to got via train, bus and cab. It would take long time and be rather expensive. So I thought he could help me in some way. I called and got no answer, checked out an alternative route, called again. No answer. I felt more and more sad, I had gone halfway around the world and waited to long to visit him so now it maybe was to late. But I tried his cellphone, and his son Daryl answered. I got to talk to Gunnar and did so for as long as he could concentrate, due to his pain. Thinking that if I couldn´t visit him I a least would like to speak to him properly on the phone. His son told me that he had been moved to a hospice, further a way from St Anthony. I asked my choir-director if I could use one of the rentalcars we had for our tour. We weren´t suppose to use the for private matters, but due to the nature of my trip both he and I thought it would be in order to take it.
I checked the map I realised that all my worries could be laid a side. The way there would include going north on the insterstate next to the hotel fro ca 20 miles and make a few turns in Oakdale and then I´d there.
I got to meet Gunnar a last time, I stayed for as long as dared and then we prayed to God. He was crying out loud when I left, for some reason I couldn´t feel any sorrow and pain. My only thought was, smile at him, honestly and with love, smile. I did so and left.
We went home to sweden the next day and I called his son when I got home. He got my e-mail and about a week later I got the message that Gunnar was dead. I don´t know how, but I know THAT God helped me to meet him one last time and to be able to say goodbye.
I hope that Gunnar will be one of the persons that´ll meet me outside the pearly gates when I come to heaven, because he ment so much to me, so much for my spiritual development. I now genrally know how to keep calm in times of stress and sorrow.

I was very shaken when I left, I didn´t want to start crying then and there. I had to go back to the hotel on a big highway, thousands of miles away from home in a car that I didn´t own, in a country where you can get sued for everything you own if you hurt somebody. I pressed down my tears and thought, this isn´t good in a psychological perspective, but I had to. I haven´t cried since then when I´ve thought about Gunnar, not until today, reading everything you hav writen here.

Vila i frid Gunnar.
Vi ses på uppståndelsens morgon.
Elias

For those unaware of his poetry page, here is a link that I know you will enjoy.

http://www.poetrybygunnar.com/

I met Gunnar about a year after Marilyn died, and he was still sad, very lonely, but determined to get on with his life. I told him I had broad shoulders, if he wanted to talk about her, cry, whatever, that’s what I was there for. And he did, and we grew to be very close and dear friends over the years. Three years ago he spent Christmas Eve with me and my family. As he always did, he gifted me with his homemade Swedish cardamon coffee cake! We often met for lunch when one of us was feeling overwhelmed by life or had an event to celebrate. He had the most calming spirit of anyone I know. And although he always was there for me, for others, ministering always in his calming and soothing manner, I soon learned that there were times he needed to be ministered to as well. That was the crux of our friendship. We were there for each other. I was there when he lost his precious dog – his precious cat. I remember the tears over the phone when he called to tell me they were “gone.”

He loved his family with his whole heart, with all their special and unique qualities. Grandchildren were precious to him, and his face glowed when he would share with me the latest pictures or accomplishments. He was the truest and most loyal man I’ve ever known.

Early on, it used to be a challenge to get him to laugh. I used to tease him that he was the most stoic Swede I knew, and that God put me in his life to teach him how to laugh unabashedly. And that he finally did! I loved nothing more than to make him laugh out loud!

I encouraged Gunnar to share his heart-felt poetry on the internet, and I published several of his poems on my site until I finally managed to convince him to set up his own webpage.

I know that it was at one time his wish to publish the poetry his beloved Marilyn had written, along with his own, in one book. If his children would like to do one last thing to preserve his legacy, it might be that you consider a self-published book in your parents’ memory. I know he would be very pleased.

The past couple of years I was not as available to him as I had been due to personal changes in my life. He was always there if I needed a shoulder, and he called frequently to update me on his health, and always to see how I was doing. The last contact I had was a phone call in mid-May telling me he was in a great deal of pain, and if I wanted to see him one last time, I should hurry and come see him. But I waited too long. Maybe it was because subconsciously I didn’t want to tarnish the memory I have of him. I wanted to remember the healthy, seemingly omnipotent Swede who always spoke so proudly of his Swedish heritage, who so proudly shared newly learned Swedish phrases and words at the drop of a hat and who was happiest when he was helping others!

Gunnar, knowing you, you would understand and forgive me for staying away. I am sure you understood that I had great difficulty coming to see my once-so-vibrant friend in a weakened, dying state.

And by the way, I loved our spirited conversations – me the evangelical Christian, you the liberal UCC minister! Our differences never got in the way. You were far too respectful a man to allow that to happen.

Tack så mycket my friend. . I will cherish always the Dala Horse necklace you gave me … and all the Swedish traditions that you shared with me, the part-Irish, part-English, part-French woman you called friend. I thank God for your forever friendship. I will miss your presence in this world – but I know you are wearing a heavenly crown … encrusted with jewels!

My deepest condolences to Gunnar’s family. If Daryl and Kaye, whom I’ve met, would care to contact me, I’d appreciate it. [email protected]

I am Sam's mom (who read today) Thank you for letting him be a part of the service. He had a great deal of respect and admiration for Gunnar. Gunnar was a special soul and I feel fortunate that Sam had the chance to get to know him through Mayflower.

Gunnar and I served on several church committees, and sang in the church choir together for several years. His thoughtful, kind and hopeful words were always helpful - reminding us all that we should work and sing together. His positive and calm view of the world helped everyone.

He will be greatly missed.

Gunnar was our next door neighbor for several years when he lived on Gardena Lane.

I recall looking after his dog, cat and birds when he was away performing in Sweden a few years ago as a part of a male chorus.

I remember the sadness as his wife Marilyn passed away shortly after their retirement. Gunnar understood my grief as I watched my wife June slowly slip away after a lengthy and exhausting battle with Alzheimer's.

Gunnar was the one who took in our mail in the early days when my wife June and I were off traveling to forensic conferences.

Gunnar's poetry was always impressive and many times touching but always displayed a depth of feeling.

For Gunnar, the term gentleman was a perfect fit in every way.

Gunnar and I had a close working relationship at the Inter Faculty Organization for many years. He was such a caring, thoughtful,and pleasant person who did live by Christian principles. I will miss his friendship, but happy his suffering is over. His family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Jeanne Ristrom

June 6, 2009

As the brother of Gunnar, I appreciated he fact that Gunnar truly had throughout his life had a core set of basic values, rooted in his upbringing in the United Church of Christ. He truly believed in the social gospel of the Church and always practiced it in his everyday life.

Gunnar came to Virginia and performed the marriage of my second wife, Anita, and I. Anita, over the years, became "a favorite" of Gunnar and she, in turn, was always concerned about the welfare of Gunnar.

In sum, my brother was a "class act" who truly set of standard for those around him. Anita and I will miss him greatly.

When I was about five years old, and Gunnar was a "wee toddler," Mom used to say, "Tie brother's shoes, Ann," and that was the beginning of a significant relationship I had with Gunnar, my little brother for most of my life.
However, "Little Brother" became "A Bigger Brother!" Gunnar was a rather emotional young man that cherished his unfailing belief in God and, in every way, tried to integrate those Christian virtues into the his life's goals and in being the father of four fine young men, my nephews.
We were blessed with a "silver lining," whem Gunnar became so ill this past year, and I was privileged to know more personally my nephews, their wives and families who "stepped right in," as did my younger brother, Nelson and his wife, all of whom gave their support during this very difficult time.
So I am proud of my family and the values our parents taught us many years ago.
I cannot tie Gunnar's shoes any more, but I do remember his smiling, boyish face when he looked up at me many years ago. I think he and I came together again before God took him to a place where you don't need shoes!
Sister Ann

Years ago I was Best Man at the wedding of Gunnar's brother, Nelson. Visiting Richmond VA from Minneapolis, Gunnar performed the religious marriage ceremony, even with the Lord's Prayer spoken in Tagalog, a Phillipine dialect. I requested and received from Gunnar his enjoyable poetry; last received of last month. Two poems really summed up Gunnar's deepest commitment to loving others: For Marilyn (his wife) and Camo (his dog). It was our privilege to have known this good man who lived a loving life. What more can be asked of life.

Gunnar was a great guy, he'll be greatly missed. I sat next to Gunnar in the ASI Male Chorus, sharing "musik" with him when there wasn't enough for all. It was an honor to know this man and I know that the Swedish Male Chorus in Heaven will sing "Ride The Chariot" so much the louder with Gunnar beside them.

My name is Jessica Laura Wikstrom. I am Gunnar Wikstrom, Jr. 's youngest niece. My most vivid memories of Gunnar are from childhood and college. As my family grew apart after a divorce, I do not have many memories of my uncle. But those I do have are meaningful. He would very gently remind all of us what it means to be good. I can remember a walk with him and some other family members. There was never a moment when you didn't feel at peace in his presence. I can also remember him visiting me at the College of William and Mary with my father. He reminded me of the importance of God. He showed me how little choices can impact our lives. He taught me how important it is to live a life centered around not our own needs but God's. Above all he was a wise man. Wise not in a cunning sense, but rather in a true and meaningful way. He valued and respected any person trying to make their life better in a good, positive way. I didn't know he belonged to a church choir. This is interesting because I belong to one as well. I share his love of books, music, and church. I will miss my uncle because he was a powerful person in the most silent, unselfish way.