Kathleen O'Connell Elder

1973 - 2024

Kathleen O'Connell Elder
Kathleen O'Connell Elder died on May 21, 2024, at her home in Waterford, Virginia from metastatic breast cancer in the liver. Kathleen was loved, visited, and cared for by friends and family. Her three sons were able to spend her last days by her side reading to her, talking to her, holding her hand, and sitting with her. Kathleen approached death with uncommon grace.
Kathleen was born to Cornelius and Nancy O'Connell on September 9, 1973. Growing up in Midland, Michigan, Kathleen developed a lifelong love for nature and the outdoors. Numerous family camping trips as a young girl and a deep family connection to YMCA Camp Hayo-Went-Ha only strengthened her love of the outdoors. Kathleen went on to help establish the now thriving Camp Arbutus Hayo-Went-Ha for girls, where she led other strong, young women on adventures throughout Northern Michigan. As a mother, she would later ensure that her boys would have similar opportunities by attending Camp Hayo-Went-Ha. She graduated from Midland High School in 1991 and followed her heart West to the mountains of Montana, where she studied Forestry at the University of Montana, graduating in 1998. Upon graduation, Kathleen moved to Washington D.C., where she served on the staff of the U.S. Senate Committee on Energy and Natural Resources and the U. S. House Committee on Agriculture, where she advised Members of Congress on forest policy.
Kathleen married Fitzhugh Elder IV in 1999 and they had three sons together. She was the loving, nurturing, and devoted mother to Fitzhugh V, William, and Keegan. In 2012 Kathleen moved to Waterford, Virginia to raise her family, as well as chickens, bees, and even a few steers with her son, Keegan. During this time Kathleen developed a passion for books, bread baking, writing, painting, gardening, hiking, and generally exploring life. She was curious about everything and found fulfillment in expanding her mind, becoming a Master Gardener and encouraging others to follow their passions. She gave her time to the Waterford Foundation and the Old Dominion Land Conservancy. She was also an inspirational writer and she honed an ability to record musings on life that were intensely personal yet expressed the universality of our human nature. Kathleen showed nothing but love, courage, and grace, right on through her final days. Even on tough days, she still believed and professed that the world is bursting with love.
Kathleen is survived by her three sons: Fitzhugh V, William, and Keegan, and their father, Fitz. She is also survived by her mother, Nancy O'Connell; her siblings, Lisa (David) Pugh, John O'Connell, Joe (Stephanie Schanher) O'Connell, and Michael (Carolyn) O'Connell; her in-laws, Fitzhugh (Chris) Elder III, sister-in-law Logan (Jonathan) Downey, sister-in-law Lock (Burke) Saunders; 16 nieces and nephews, and three grand nieces. In addition, she leaves behind a large extended family and numerous friends whom she considered family. She was predeceased by her father, Cornelius O'Connell, and sister, Julie O'Connell.
Funeral services will be held on June 8th at 11:00 a.m. at St. James' Episcopal Church in Leesburg, VA with a reception to follow at the Historic Waterford Old School. Memorial donations may be made to YMCA Camp Arbutus Hayo-Went-Ha.
(An avid reader, Kathleen believed that books have the power to change lives. The family asks those attending her celebration of life to bring a book to exchange at the reception.)