Patricia Ann Stoy

Patricia Ann Thompson Stoy, 94, born September 28, 1931 in Washington DC, died peacefully of natural causes February 7, 2026 at her home in Kansas City, Missouri, with her daughter Debi at her side.

Pat married Dutton (Dut) Gordon Stoy in 1954, became a military wife and then an amazing mom to four girls. She orchestrated at least ten moves and made them look easy! Pat was there through it all: boats, motorcycles, sports cars, and airplanes. She supported her daughters in dance, Girl Scouts, cheerleading, and soccer. She put up with dogs, a parakeet, a chicken, and tadpoles! She could do it just about anything, especially sewing and crafts. One constant was family dinner at the dining room table every night. When Pat’s youngest daughter, Brenda, entered elementary school, Pat returned to teaching, her chosen career. She taught elementary school in Springfield, Virginia for about thirty years.

Pat and Dut retired at the young age of fifty-five and moved to Chatham County, North Carolina. Their retirement was busy: volunteering at North Chatham Fire Department and the Ronald McDonald House in Chapel Hill, traveling the world, and spending wonderful time with their family. After Dut died, Pat continued to live in North Carolina (building a new home with the help of her son-in-law, Jess) until she was no longer able to live alone. Pat sold her house in North Carolina and, together with her daughter Debi, moved to Kansas City, Missouri, in 2023. It was Debi’s honor and privilege to be her mom’s full-time caregiver for the remainder of her life.

Debi is grateful for the help and love of Pat’s other caregivers: Kim, Paula, Julie, and Katty. Debi will always be indebted to KU Geriatric Medicine physician, Janelle Jones, MD, and her Kansas City Hospice team: Ladonna, Sherry, Barb, Cathy, and Sam.

Pat (Mom, Grandmom, Gigi) spent three years in Kansas City close to her granddaughter Kristen, grandson-in-law, Zachary, and great grandson Elijah. Pat attended soccer and baseball games and visited Kristen’s horse, Lucy, at the barn. She became a frequent flyer on Southwest Airlines, making many trips to Dallas to visit her grandson, Michael, granddaughter-in-law, Nicole, and great grandson, Jaxon.

Pat was greeted in heaven by her husband, Dut, her daughter, Sharon, many other family members and friends, and a menagerie of pets.

Pat is survived by a loving family and many friends, including daughters Debra (William) Bernard, Kathee (Jess) Dishner, and Brenda (Bruce) Hilgartner; grandchildren Michael (Nicole) Bernard, Kristen (Zachary) Mullin, Brandee (Dustin) James, Brittney (Luis) Arce, Natasha (Michael) Mayfield, Eric Hilgartner, and Oliver Hilgartner; great grandchildren (her pride and joy!) Keegan and Connor Arce, Karis, Silas, and Evan James, Elijah Mullin, and Jaxon Bernard; nieces Jan and Sherri Stoy and their mom, Lynn Kimmel ,and several cousins.

In lieu of cards or flowers, please consider making a donation in Pat’s name to:

Ronald McDonald House of Chapel Hill

101 Old Mason Farm Rd.

Chapel Hill, NC. 27517

Kansas City Hospice

9001 State Line Rd., Suite 300

Kansas City, MO 64114

North Star Church

11250 N Eastern Ave.

Kansas City, MO 64156

There will be a small gathering for Pat in Kansas City. Pat will be buried with her husband, Dutton, and her daughter, Sharon, on a date that has yet to be determined.

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