Philip Eugene Pate

A life well lived. . . Philip Eugene Pate passed away at home peacefully and calmly on Wednesday, January 28th.

He is survived by his wife of 42 years, Allyson, children Adam (wife Lisa and granddaughter, Lilah) of Vermont, Jonathan of California, and Rebecca of Winchester. Philip adored Allyson and she adored him. Together they personified a marriage built on love and respect. As a proud dad and grandfather, he was warm, affectionate, not a helicopter parent - oh, to the contrary, and he basked in their successes!

Philip (don't call him Phil!) is also survived by siblings Alfred "Smitty" Pate (Patricia) of Western Springs, IL, Katie Anderson (John) of Glen Allen, VA, Susan Catlin (David) of Kennesaw, GA, and several nieces and nephews, and Robin Kulwin (Cliff), Allyson's favorite sister ever, of Montclair, NJ. He was pre-deceased by his parents Maj. Chauncey Carlisle and Mary Catherine Pate, and stepson, Daniel. And there are his friends, oh so many friends far and wide, among them, the legendary southern restaurant, Bonnie Blue!

Philip was brilliant, and had extraordinarily varied interests, an avid reader, the glue for so many in the community who he liked to say he stuck together, an exemplary community volunteer, loved to travel and learn (or stumble through) languages. As the child of an air force pilot, he was born in Kansas, lived in Hawaii, Indiana, South Carolina, ultimately landing in Winchester for well over forty years.

Being a dedicated citizen was important to Philip and that led to his serving on numerous boards ranging from the Northwestern Community Services (chairman and board member), City Council and represented Winchester on Virginia First Cities, (chairman and member), Winchester Exchange Club Child-Parent Center of which he presided as Doo-Dah King, taking his duties very seriously! He was honored to be a recipient of a Tigger Award from Judge Elizabeth Kellas. Being an honorary member of the Beth El Congregation Sisterhood, was a source of pride and brought smiles. Philip was a relentless advocate for families and children through his work as a clinical and forensic psychologist, working with and for individual clients, as well as the federal court system.

Philip was the heart and soul of the North Braddock (No Bra) neighborhood. So many will hold on to their fond memories of him bringing people together on the veranda for Scotch on the Porch (or the beverage of one's choice), and let's not forget those cigars. People from all over Winchester appeared every Halloween for Philip's signature yearly event - Shots and Tots (because shots for tots would be wrong).

Philip attended and thrived at The Latin School of Indianapolis where he made lifelong friendships. Today he is remembered as being the one who encouraged others to do better. He was proud of having earned his undergraduate degree from Indiana University (Go Hoosiers!) and with his Psychology degree in hand became an orderly at the Winchester Medical Center, followed by a stint with Child Protective Services in Warren County, then back to school for a Masters Degree in Counseling from James Madison University, a second Masters at George Mason University He then worked at Growing Edge, an international consulting firm specializing in leadership development, all while earning his PhD in Clinical Psychology at George Mason University and raising a wonderful family. Continuing education was a always a passion which then took him on the path to earning his credential as a forensic psychologist.

Sartorial splendor, music, food, travel- such a range! Never without a hat, a walking stick (NOT a cane), bow ties, lapel pins, from Hawaiian shirts on the beach at the Valentin in Riviera Maya to tuxedos on the Queen Mary II, he rocked it all. A self-described poster child for the rhythmically impaired, that didn't stop him from taking dance lessons where he and Allyson danced the tango on outside steps at the Paris Opera House, followed by less successful ballroom dancing lessons where he did manage to master a sway. A broad appreciation for music took him from Van Morrison (a favorite) to blue grass (best block party) to classical (pass on opera). Movies - an aficionado of Monty Python, to A Man for All Seasons, and military documentaries. Scuba diving in Debrovnik - yes, he checked that off his list; to exploring museums and alley ways in Paris, Crete, Corfu, Catania, and much of Europe. Nothing quite compared, however, to the Handley Library - an absolute love of his - the books, the staff, the volunteers, all held a special place in his heart.

Arrangements are private, per Philip's wishes. In his memory, please consider doing an act of kindness in keeping with what Philip would have done. Donations in his memory may be made to Blue Ridge Care, 333 West Cork Street, Unit 405, Winchester, VA 22601. Their care, compassion, and professionalism were unparalleled.

Indeed, a life well lived!