Thomas W. "Papa" Dardis

It is with great sadness that we share the passing of a beloved husband, father and grandfather, Tom Dardis-known to so many as "Papa"-who left this world on Monday, December 22, after a brief illness. He departed knowing what mattered most to him: that his children and grandchildren were already planning to be together for the holidays. Family was always his greatest joy. Tom loved with his whole heart. At the center of his world was his bride, Marianne, whom he loved deeply for more than 61 years. Their marriage was his greatest pride. He admired her, protected her, and stood by her with unwavering devotion, even as Alzheimer's has slowly taken the pieces of the woman he adored. Watching that journey was heartbreaking for him, but he never stopped showing her love-through presence, loyalty, quiet strength, a squeeze of her hand and a gentle kiss goodnight. To Tom, Marianne was not just his wife; she was his partner, his home, and his constant.

Tom was a helper. Whether it was being an usher at church, an umpire at his kid's baseball or softball games, driving his wife to work in the snow, driving his grandchildren to their countless activities, being an AA sponsor, grabbing groceries or babysitting grandchildren. Making someone's life easier or better brought him such joy.

In turn, Tom had a deep appreciation for the helpers of the world-first responders, nurses and doctors, referees, police officers, garbage collectors, handymen, and wait or cleaning staff. He called them all "good guys," and he went out of his way to thank them, often to the point of gentle embarrassment. Helping was second nature to him, summed up perfectly in his familiar refrain: "Is there anything I could do?" He truly meant it.

A natural host, Tom was the mayor of every room he entered-whether or not he lived there. He lit up the room with his smile and a wave to all who entered. When traveling, he made sure servers knew why everyone was together and who belonged to whom, proudly introducing his family like the greatest showman. His favorite place of all was Sanibel Island, where his greatest joy was simply sitting on the screened-in porch, coffee in hand, surrounded by the family he loved. He was endlessly interested in what each person was doing, celebrating accomplishments big and small with equal enthusiasm. He was outspoken, deeply emotional, a gifted writer, and could deliver a darn good speech whenever the moment called for it.

Nothing brought Tom more happiness than time with his grandchildren. From early morning walks to fetch the newspaper or collecting shells on Sanibel Island to sitting faithfully on the sidelines of every sporting event or concert he could attend, he showed up-always. Sports were one of the ways he stayed connected: a die-hard Chicago fan, a loyal supporter of his grandchildren's teams, and to the family's dismay, an Iowa State fan in a house divided by Iowa loyalties.

He was also a dog person through and through, loving his dogs-especially Sarge-and his grand-dogs just as fiercely. Food was his love language: shared meals, popcorn, M&M's, and a steady Diet Coke. He offered wisdom in practical ways-like reminding you to use a rubber mallet instead of a hammer-and held onto things long after their meaning faded, simply because they once mattered.

The world feels quieter without Tom's voice, his texts sent left and right at all hours of the day once he mastered his cellphone, his firewood gifts to each grandchild, and his unmistakable "Dardis wave." He was immensely proud of his children-not only for their professional success, but for finding their life partners, just as he had. We take comfort knowing he is reunited with Kyle in heaven, smiling down on us all with a diet coke in one hand and waving with his other.

Wave your hand high until we meet again, Dad. We love you with all our hearts.

Thomas W. Dardis, beloved husband of Marianne, nee Hoyer; loving father of Kevin (Staci) Dardis, Christine (Chris) Bernard, Colleen (Paul Mauer) Dardis and the late Kyle (Kelly) Dardis; proud grandfather of Maya, Max, Gavin, Ben, Ellie and Erin; dear brother of Michael (Joan) Dardis and David (Lynn) Dardis; fond uncle of many nieces and nephews.