Thomas Yao Ting Kuo

1935 - 2025

Thomas Yao Ting Kuo
10/16/1935 - 08/19/2025
Thomas Yao Ting Kuo, epicure, master chef, exotic car enthusiast, globe trotter, road tripper, and cat and cyclotron whisperer, died on August 19, 2023. He was Yao Ting to his Chinese-speaking friends and Tom to his English-speaking friends. He had two birthdays-though the "wrong" one was on his American passport, the real one, October 16th, 1935, shared a birth month with his son, Augustine Kuo, who he always called "Augie."
Years before Anthony Bourdain celebrated the art of the picky eater, Tom was already ahead of the foodie game. Even when traveling to Paris or Switzerland, his discerning palate meant he stubbornly stuck to what he loved-Italian food, Chinese food, or McDonald's.
Tom's favorite Italian dish was spaghetti, and his favorite Chinese dish was beef with tomatoes-especially the authentic Cantonese version made by East Ocean restaurant in Emeryville, CA, where he was warmly known as a regular. He never met a McDonald's french fry, an egg tart from 99 Ranch, or a vending machine doughnut he didn't enjoy-each one powering late nights tinkering with cyclotrons and questions most of us couldn't Google our way through. Turns out having a PhD in physics from Michigan State helps. Tom spent decades chasing particles, mentoring minds, and generally making science look easy-and cool.
Tom never met spaghetti he couldn't cook al dente, and his secret tomato sauce-with ground beef rivaling any Neapolitan grandmother's-was kitchen legend. In his culinary command, he specially prepared steamed crab with a signature mix of vinegar, shallots, garlic, ginger, and soy sauce. Food was Tom's love language-fluent as Mandarin or English. Though not one for words, he expressed affection through every dish. At family dinners, he'd carefully deshell a crab claw to present it to Monica, his childhood sweetheart and wife, who accepted it with that knowing smile. It wouldn't be surprising if that was his proposal style.
Whip-smart and endlessly curious, Tom's life journey took him from humble beginnings as an orphan fleeing civil war in southern China, through the intellectual worlds of Taiwan, Canada, Michigan, New York, New Jersey, and California, to adventures as far-flung as Egypt's pyramids-traversed on camelback-surviving a mugging in Spain, and exploring the Fitzsimmons Range in Canada.
Never content with plane rides alone, Tom pioneered countless family road trips, driving long hours to reach national parks, campgrounds, or simply to find delicious Chinese food-even if it was more than a state away. Mostly every weekend was a trip to New York City from Hamilton Square, New Jersey, or San Francisco from Concord, CA, just to shop in Chinatown for the week's groceries.
Tom's sharp humor was often an inside joke, the punchline known only to him. Of his two children, only one was as smart as-or maybe smarter than-he was. That wasn't Augie. But Tom was a master strategist and bribed Augie with an irresistible offer: study hard and earn the long-desired little terrier dog, Bong Bong. The bribe worked. Through it, Tom taught Augie a little math and a lot about patience, perseverance, and kindness.
When Tom suffered a catastrophic stroke in 2009, it was Augie who found him and saved his life. Even afterward, Tom's appreciation for food and outings never waned-something Augie and his wife of now more than two decades, Lisa LeJeune, made possible as they managed his complex long-term care.
Tom was deeply grateful for the extensive care also provided by his daughter, Chaincy Kuo; his son-in-law, Ranjit Ashok Henry; his devoted, ever-present live-in attendant, Li Ai Yi; the family members as well as the many caregivers, doctors, therapists, and hospice teams at Kaiser who supported him through the years.
Though some mistook him for Augie's grandfather in later years, Tom continued joining his son at the gym, keeping up his strength on the stationary bike and with weights. He delighted in Porsche Club rides and car shows that Augie and Lisa helped him attend. It became a shared joke that Tom wanted red flames painted on his wheelchair so he'd finally have a proper hot rod when he could no longer drive the cars he loved.
Tom was also an affectionate cat grandparent, adored by Amber, Azure, and Rigel, who would curl up in his lap or beside him for gentle pets-earning him the lasting title of cat whisperer.
Sadly, family challenges kept Augie from spending time with Tom during his last two years, at his death bed, and at his funeral but love found a way. Augie and Lisa retraced a thirty-year-old father-son road trip. Their journey touched Tom's life landmarks: McGill University in Montreal, although he eventually earned his master's at Dalhousie University in Nova Scotia; Mount Rushmore's presidential faces; and Montana's painted badlands.
Here's to hoping that wherever Tom is now, he's reunited with Monica-his lifelong partner-and driving his red 1970s Opel GT along a sunlit coast while Pavarotti's La Bohème fills the air, guiding them to a candlelit table set with beef and tomatoes, fresh crab, and golden egg custards-a lasting taste of home.