Menu
Search by Name
Search by Name
BORN
1996
DIED
2017
Thomas Hilchey Obituary
Thomas William Hilchey, 20, of Ithaca, New York, passed away on June 4, 2017 as the result of injuries sustained in an accidental fall the previous day. He was born on Sept. 27, 1996, in Ithaca.
Tom graduated from Ithaca High School in 2014. He was a rising senior at Emory University in Atlanta, Georgia, studying neuroscience and behavioral biology, and had recently returned home from a semester abroad at the University of St. Andrews in Scotland.
An avid soccer player starting at a young age (with the MetroStars, TC United, and others), Tom loved the English Premier League team Everton F.C. and rarely missed watching their games. He played for the varsity soccer team at Oxford College of Emory University, but retired from formal soccer his junior year to concentrate on his studies. He worked in labs at both Cornell and Emory, and aspired to return to Scotland to get his MS in Neuroscience. He was fascinated by the emerging field of epigenetics—how an organism's environment can affect gene expression. He hoped to do research on ways to improve older people's quality of life rather than its length.
Tom loved the outdoors and enjoyed his time as a Gorge Steward at Cornell during the summer—walking the gorge trails, ensuring the safety of visitors and conservation of flora, and giving tours of Cascadilla and Fall Creek gorges. Tom also enjoyed mastering new things such as card magic, speed-solving a Rubik's Cube, and he relished the competition of chess, table tennis, and computer games. He loved Hemingway, A Tribe Called Quest, and Studio Ghibli. Tom was soft-spoken but generous, thoughtful, and quick to smile and to praise others. He was very self-motivated and true to himself in fashion, politics, and philosophy. He was also fiercely loyal to his Ithaca friends, his mates on the pitch, his friends in Kappa Phi Nu, and his newest group of friends at St. Andrews he called "The Lads."
Tom is survived by his brother Jack Hilchey, his mother, Amy Christian, his father, Duncan Hilchey, his grandmothers Charlotte Christian and Dorothy Hilchey, and many uncles, aunts, and cousins in New York, New Hampshire, Massachusetts, Vermont, Maine, Alabama, Georgia, and Arkansas. He was predeceased by his grandfathers, Milton Christian and John Hilchey, and his uncles Glenn Russell and Johnny Bates.
Friends and relatives are invited to Tom's home for informal visiting and quiet reflection at 295 Hook Place, Ithaca, on Tuesday and Wednesday, June 6 and 7, from 4 to 7 pm. A celebration of Tom's life by his Ithaca friends and family is being planned for later in summer, details forthcoming. Though his life has been tragically cut short, through organ donation his body will help others live longer and better lives, as he had hoped to do in his career.
In lieu of flowers, please consider contributing to the Greater Ithaca Activities Center sports program, where Tom started and coached a soccer program while he was in high school. Make checks out to GIAC Youth Afterschool Program, and note your donation is "In honor of Tom Hilchey." Send to GIAC, 301 W. Court St. Ithaca, NY 14850.
To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.
Memories and Condolences
for Thomas Hilchey
Sponsored by The Ithaca Journal.
Aunt Alice
June 4, 2024
We miss you, Tom, and your love of life.
Thoughts and prayers
Jane, someone who cares
December 24, 2017
Thoughts and prayers for the Parents, Family of Thomas during the holiday season and always...
September 14, 2017
To the Parents of Thomas...you are still in my continued thoughts and prayers....
Jane ~ a stranger who cares
Jean Cook (Neal)
July 25, 2017
Dear Duncan, Amy, and Jack
Please know how sorry I was to get that call from Susan with the terrible news of Tom's accidental death. Obviously he was an exceptional young man with a bright future. Remarks posted by so many show he left unforgettable impressions during his short life. I was one of them. You see last year while attending a special birthday party I met Tom. I enjoyed talking with him so much that I relayed the event to someone the very next day. I was so impressed that someone so young took the time to spend talking to me one-on-one. He made me, an old woman, feel special. As Susan relayed the tragic news to me, I was shocked and heartbroken to realize it was your Tom. Just know he touched my heart.
Marilyn Norris
July 20, 2017
I am saddened to know of Tom's death. I did not get to meet him even though we were relatives. His fraternal grandmother is my aunt. My heart grieves for the family and his friends. There are no words to express what a loss this tragedy is to all that knew and loved him.
Duncan and Amy, may God give you peace and comfort now and times to come.
Marilyn Brooks Norris
Biology of Social Insects Module
June 19, 2017
== A message from staff and students at St Andrews who worked with Tom Hilchey ==
Tom opted to take our Biology and Behaviour of Social Insects' module from January onwards, to pursue an enthusiasm for bees and to get a slightly different take on behavioural biology from his main interests in neuroscience. After a few introductory staff lectures, each member of the class gave a long seminar and led the subsequent discussions, interspersed with coffee and cake and general chat, so we got to know each other very well. Tom was a tremendous asset to the group of 18 who worked together on these themes, and we are all distraught to hear of this very tragic news.
For the students, Ros wrote: I only knew Tom from the Social Insects class, but even from the few times I spoke with him, he came across as a very kind, softly-spoken and warm-hearted person. He was clearly passionate about Epigenetics, and the detail in his presentation revealed a true fascination with the subject and its potential.
Prof Pat Willmer, the Module Organiser, wrote: I remember Tom as a quiet and gentle student who got engrossed in the module very quickly, even though the content and the teaching style were much less familiar to him than to others in the class. He read widely around all the seminars (despite his other academic interests and sporting enthusiasms), and so asked some very perceptive questions. He chose to give his own seminar on Epigenetics, perhaps the most difficult topic to take on, and wowed the rest of the group with his perceptions of how it was transforming our understanding of social insects: I wish this seminar had come earlier in the course, as it would have opened the eyes of other students taking on less tricky subjects. It was so clear that this was an area that Tom had taken to his heart, and could discuss deeply giving his own opinions and insights. I was also entranced by Tom's wholehearted enthusiasm for football, and he was the only lad who shared my own joy the morning after Barcelona put six goals past Paris St Germain we had a celebratory extra piece of cake that morning, as we went through each of the goals in great detail, and the other students clearly thought we were both a bit daft.... Tom was perhaps the only visiting student who has really made a difference to this module in the last 8 years that it has run I am so very sad that he will not be coming back here, and cannot continue to delve into the realms of epigenetics in the future.
Dr Andy Gardner, who also teaches on the course, wrote: We are all extremely saddened by this news. Tom's seminar on Epigenetics particularly stood out to me in that he went beyond simply recounting what is known in the scientific literature but also gave the class his opinions on which mechanisms are most plausible, which new results are most exciting, and the overall direction in which the field is headed. I think he would have gone on to make interesting contributions to this topic, and I will think of him whenever I hear of new scientific discoveries being made in this area.
Alice Christian
June 17, 2017
Tom, your spirit lives in our hearts. There's a beeswax candle from NH burning for you here. I hear that you loved bees. May your sweetness be what we remember.
Sandip Banerjee
June 14, 2017
Dear Duncan and Amy,
I am shocked to read the news, I extend my heartful condolences to both of you on the untimely demise of Thomas, may the almighty give you strength to overcome such an immense and irreparable loss.
May his soul rest in peace
respectfully
June 13, 2017
Dear Amy and Duncan,
My sincerest condolences for your loss. Wishing you comfort and solace from the community around you during this time of grief.
Warmly, Kathy De Master
Evan Hazard
June 12, 2017
Dear Duncan & Amy & grandmother Charlotte [whom I know from the Arlo & Janis blog]. This is dreadful news. There will be prayers tomorrow from the UMC theology workshop here at Koronis Assembly Grounds in Paynesville, MN. My deepest consolations. Evan Hazard [Cornell '51], Bemidji, MN
Steven Dukeshire
June 12, 2017
Dear Duncan and Amy,
My deepest sympathies for your loss. Although I did not know Thomas, he sounds like an incredible person who left a lasting mark.
With sympathy,
Steven
Greg Cameron
June 12, 2017
Dear Duncan and Amy,
I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your son. You are are in my thoughts at this time.
All my very best,
Greg Cameron
June 11, 2017
Dear Amy and Duncan,
I am shocked and very sorry to hear about the sad and untimely demise of Thomas Hilchey. May his soul rest in peace. I pray peace and strength for both of you to overcome this irreparable loss in life.
Neetu Choudhary
June 11, 2017
Dear Duncan and Amy,
I am so sorry to hear of this news. My deepest sympathies are with you. I am thinking of you and keeping you both in my prayers during this difficult time. Sending you strength and peace.
Yours,
Carrie Scrufari
Dorothy Suput
June 10, 2017
Duncan and Amy, I am incredibly sorry to learn of your loss. Nothing can be more devastating than losing a child.
Francois Pelatan
June 10, 2017
Dear Amy, dear Duncan,
In this difficult period, I send my sincere condolences to Duncan and Amy, I understand the intensity of the moment when all seems disrupted drastically : sky, trees, lakes, rivers,mountains, birds....homes...
With my affections and sympathy to you and the rest of the familly.
François Pelatan
June 10, 2017
Duncan and Amy, I'm so very sorry. My heart goes out to you. Love and condolences---Gail
Neva Hassanein
June 10, 2017
Duncan and Amy, I am deeply sorry to hear of your loss. Sincere condolences, Neva
Daniel O'Connell
June 10, 2017
Duncan and family,
There are events that simply reverberate loss and love out into the world, and Tom's passing had this effect for me. I will be holding you and your family in the light during this time of unbearable mourning.
Much love,
Isobel Greenhalgh
June 9, 2017
I didn't know Tom particularly well but was in class with him. However, from what I knew of him he seemed like an incredibly lovely guy. He helped me out multiple times in labs always with a smile and a laugh and I am glad to have had even a small chance to get to know him. My thoughts and prayers go out to his family and friends at this time.
Gabe Baskin
June 9, 2017
As a Freshman all you want is to be accepted by your new community of apparent strangers that you've just met. I remember the first night I spent at Oxford college, Tom, who I had just briefly met in our hall, sent me a message inviting me to hangout with him. I was touched by his friendliness and willingness to invite some kid he just met to hangout with him and his friends. Tom took me, and really the entire Freshman class of the soccer team, under his wing. He showed us the ropes of school, he helped us with whatever we needed, but most of all he was an impeccable friend. Tom would always be smiling, joking around, and just brightening the atmosphere wherever he went. He would always be down for whatever conversations there were, from simple things like classes, to big epistemological questions. He loved making soccer practices fun, but most of all, he loved us, his teammates. At the end of the season, Tom was a dear friend to all of us, Freshman and Sophomores alike, because of his infectious personality. At our end of the year banquet, which was harry potter themed, it was Tom who was named the "Chosen one." Tom was an incredible friend, a remarkable teammate, and most importantly a very special person with an incredibly kind and caring soul. I hope to emulate Tom and his strong and kind character. "May the memory of the righteous be for a blessing."
Leslyn McBean-Clairborne
June 9, 2017
Tom's contribution to the youth at GIAC was unmatched. He introduced soccer with such passion and love that it was infectious and every child who took up the sport brought the same attitude to it. They played with such gentleness, team spirit and skill level that even after one semester of coaching they were undefeated and held that title for the past three years. GIAC is thankful for your grace and kindness. Rest In Peace, Tom.
June 9, 2017
Tom was in my medieval history tutorial at St Andrews. He was bright, funny, full of life, and caring. He always made us laugh and was an amazingly sweet person. I feel blessed to have known Tom and wish you the most heartfelt of condolences in this time of grief.Even though he was only at St Andrews for a semester, he made it a better place. Rest in peace.
Arr Eisen
June 9, 2017
Dear Hilcheys,
Tom was in my epigenetics class at Emory last year--a caring, bright, quiet, and thoughtful student. It was a small class of maybe a dozen students, so we all got to know each other well. His death is a crushing blow to my gut and heart, so I know you must be unbelievably and unbearable sad. From me, my family, and the Emory family, I send you compassion, support and love,
Arri Eisen
Professor
Emory Biology
Megerssa Walo
June 8, 2017
This is heartbreaking news! I wish strength and comfort for family and friends of this young man.
Nancy Taber Richards
June 8, 2017
What sad and stunning news. I have read the comments and can only add my agreement with the heartfelt outpourings. Sending love, bear hugs, sincere condolences and even a daring prayer (from one who has been in similar shoes) that you will be held through your undoubtedly long grief, leading to a space of deep peace when the time is right. (I recommend the book "Tear Soup," in my experience one of the best grieving resources out there.)
Carolyn Zezima
June 8, 2017
I am so sorry for your terrible loss. Me you and your whole family comfort each other in your grief. Sending all my condolences
Lucilla Iacumin
June 8, 2017
Dear Duncan and family,
My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family during this difficult time, my sincere condolences over the loss of your loved Tom.
Nancy Lee Bentley
June 8, 2017
Dear Amy and Duncan,
It is with a shocked and heavy heart, hearing of this sudden news about the loss of your son, Tom, that I extend my sincere and deepest empathy to you both.
It is never an easy or simple thing to lose a loved one, let alone your own child. And few others can even begin to imagine what it means when this happens quickly, without warning, leaving you to go on, outliving your own offspring.
Sometimes all we can do is trust. And have faith that at some point you will be able to gain some more insight, understanding and hopefully peace about all of this.
Your son, Tom, was obviously a bright and beautiful soul, radiating light into this world. Though we may not understand it now, there is
definitely a sense that his work on a higher level
continues. He blessed you, us, all too briefly with his physical presence, but the warmth of his deep and abiding Love continues ~ and will continue ~ to shine here.
You are Loved.
Michael Dougherty
June 8, 2017
Duncan and Amy, I am so sorry to hear of your sudden loss. I am thinking of you in this difficult time.
Brian Raison
June 8, 2017
I've been thinking of you all almost constantly these past days. My prayers continue. May you forever hold good memories of your remarkable son. Our deepest love from Ohio.
Cornelia Flora
June 8, 2017
Our prayers are with you as you mourn the loss of this wonderful young man who held such promise for Ithaca and the world.
Heather Manzo
June 8, 2017
My heart is broken for your family, please know that all of you are lifted up in prayer and love.....
Jane Kolodinsky
June 8, 2017
Oh Duncan and Amy; Words cannot describe the grief you must be feeling. My sincere condolences over the loss of your son.
Janice Nigro
June 8, 2017
Amy and Duncan, I am profoundly sorry for your loss. Words cannot express...My heart goes out to you.
Jill S
June 8, 2017
Duncan and family,
It sadden me to hear of the lose of your son; you have my sincerest condolences. It sounds like Tom was a kindhearted, giving young man. I hope that in time your happiest memories will carry you through the difficult times. My prayers are with you, Jill S.
Carla Shafer
June 7, 2017
Duncan: David Kay and Mary Milne visited me this past weekend and shared the news of your loss. I was touched by their recounting of Tom's impact on their lives, and wanted to let you know that I'm thinking of you and your family in this difficult time.
June 7, 2017
Amy & Duncan,
How devastating! My heart aches for you. Know that you are in my thoughts at this difficult time.
Sending Love and Peace,
--Jim Madden
Rochester, NY
Neuroscience and Behavioral Biology Program, Emory University,
June 7, 2017
We are deeply saddened to hear of your loss. We knew Thomas as a very independent, energetic student who was always eager to explore new opportunities.His wonderful personality and smile will be missed. True to his nature his selfless gift of donating his organs contributes to the fond memories we will have in him. May your family find some comfort in the memories you shared.
Sincerely,
The NBB Faculty and Staff
Laurie Stevens
June 7, 2017
I am a close friend of Jan Frantz, who I understand is very close to your family. She told me about this accident and I'm so very sorry that it ended in this way, to such a wonderful young man. What a hero to donate his organs to help others. It definitely takes someone special to do that. By reading his obituary I can feel that he was, a sweet, pleasant and astounding young man, and how proud you must be of his accomplishments. My heart aches for all of you during this difficult time. Keep the memories close to your heart and take the time you need to grieve. He will always be with you, deep inside your heart.
God bless your family. My thoughts and prayers will be with you forever and always.
Linda Warner
June 7, 2017
Duncan and family,
My sincere wishes for you at this time. May what Tom accomplished in his short lifetime and your great memories of him help you always.
Linda
June 7, 2017
It is with sadness to hear about Tommy's passing. We watched him grow up over the summers he spent at the Hilchey camps in Raymond NH. We especially enjoyed the times when our grandkids Sierra and Bryce got to hang around with Jack and Tommy. There was always alot of laughing and smiles. They both called me yesterday to send their love to Jack during such a difficult time for him. Our sincere condolences to a very close and loving family. Peri and Bill Hutchinson
Wendy Wingate
June 6, 2017
Amy, Duncan and Jack...
My heart is heavy but I am so proud of Tom. I see him always in my mind as a three, four and five year old. "...Take him and cut him into little stars, and he will make the sky so fine that all the world will be in love with night..." You are all in my thoughts and prayers. Wendy Wingate
Lyn Pace
June 6, 2017
Dear Hilchey Family,
I knew Tom at Oxford College as his college Chaplain and worked with him during his first year in the Leadership Oxford experience. Please accept my deepest condolences at this time. You all are in my thoughts and prayers. If I can be helpful in any way, please let me know.
Sincerely,
Rev. Lyn Pace ([email protected])
Oxford College Chaplain
June 6, 2017
Heartbreaking. I'm sorry to read about the tragic passing of your son/brother/loved one and friend. It is a blessing to know Thomas gave the Gift of Life ❤ My heartfelt condolences to all who knew this exceptional young man.
Jane ~ a stranger who cares.
Dianne Quimby
June 6, 2017
We are so saddened by your loss. Our hearts go out to everyone in the family. Hugs to all, Dianne and Bill Quimby, Cape Breton, Canada
Ibe Jonah
June 6, 2017
The Ithaca Soccer Community mourn the sudden and untimely passing of Tom, an avid soccer player & fan, and a wonderfully decent human being. He was scheduled to play this Summer in our Coed Division 1 League. Our heartfelt condolences to Tom's family and friends. Our fervent thoughts and prayers are with you all.
-Ithaca United Soccer Club
Joy
June 6, 2017
My thoughts and prayers are with his family. He was a wonderful and helpful young teen. He will be missed, RIP
Maureen Whitehead
June 6, 2017
My heart aches for you. His spirit will be with us forever. {{hugs}}
Ed & Jane Stevenson
June 6, 2017
The thoughts and prayers of many of us in Helena are with your family in this terrible time.
Terri Denman
June 6, 2017
My condolences to the family. Such a tragic end to a young life so giving to others.
Scott Wettlaufer
June 6, 2017
Sad to hear about Tom. We moved from upstate NY the year he was born, but we watched him grow through Amy and Duncan's postings on social media. He will be missed.
Showing 1 - 53 of 53 results
Make a Donation
in Thomas Hilchey's name
Memorial Events
for Thomas Hilchey
How to support Thomas's loved ones
Honor a beloved veteran with a special tribute of ‘Taps’ at the National WWI Memorial in Washington, D.C.
The nightly ceremony in Washington, D.C. will be dedicated in honor of your loved one on the day of your choosing.
Read more
Should I Send Sympathy Flowers?
What kind of arrangement is appropriate, where should you send it, and when should you send an alternative?
Read more
What Should I Write in a Sympathy Card?
We'll help you find the right words to comfort your family member or loved one during this difficult time.
Read moreResources to help you cope with loss
Estate Settlement Guide
If you’re in charge of handling the affairs for a recently deceased loved one, this guide offers a helpful checklist.
Read more
Obituaries, grief & privacy: Legacy’s news editor on NPR podcast
Legacy's Linnea Crowther discusses how families talk about causes of death in the obituaries they write.
Read more
The Five Stages of Grief
They're not a map to follow, but simply a description of what people commonly feel.
Read moreWays to honor Thomas Hilchey's life and legacy
Obituary Examples
You may find these well-written obituary examples helpful as you write about your own family.
Read more
Obituary Templates – Customizable Examples and Samples
These free blank templates make writing an obituary faster and easier.
Read more
How Do I Write a Eulogy?
Some basic help and starters when you have to write a tribute to someone you love.
Read more
