Gabrielle K. McGhee

Gabrielle (Gaby) McGhee, known to some as "The Indomitable" (and occasionally as "she who must be obeyed") was an astonishing person in so many ways - her energy for doing good work, her curiosity about others (she'd strike up a conversation with anyone, anywhere, anytime), her compassion and tenderness toward the overlooked of the world, her love for her family and friends, and her many quirks (spoonful of mayo straight out of the jar, anyone?). She carried the burdens and cares of others on her shoulders and in her heart, and she did her best throughout her life to ease them however she could. There was nothing she would not do for her family or her beloved friends and community. Born and raised in Manhattan, Gabrielle was a city girl whose life was profoundly changed by her beloved Girl Scouts. She came home from camp as a little girl and announced to her parents that "the city smells like garbage and I'm going to live in the country when I grow up!" and boy did she ever. After attending the Lenox School for Girls on full scholarship, she graduated from Cornell University in three and a half years. Soon after graduation, having taken the train to the Hudson Valley to visit a college friend, she noticed a young man standing on the stairs at a square dance, listening intently to his friends, and she instantly registered how alive with curiosity and strength he seemed to be. She married that young man, Donald McGhee, and her dream of country life came true. They settled in Steuben, NY ("five miles north of Holland Patent, NY, a town of 300") as her children would recite for the rest of their lives when asked where they were from, and raised their four children on 120 acres of fields, woods, creeks, barns, and an ancient farmhouse heated with a woodstove. Gabrielle taught algebra and geometry at Holland Patent High School for thirty years, where she also advised AFS and Mathletics and coached softball. Her students, many of whom kept in touch with her forever, remember her as unfailingly kind, warm, and a great listener. Her mother was determined she get a degree in something practical, but Gabrielle was always most fascinated by people, which explains why, when she retired from teaching, she went back to graduate school and opened a private practice in Marriage and Family Therapy for the next fifteen years. Gabrielle was a woman of many and varied accomplishments, but one of her most charming qualities was the joy she took in simple things: a bowl of ice cream, her peonies, a new shirt from the Label Shopper, a breakfast meet-up with some of her many friends. Gabrielle and Donald were known as bird whisperers. They were world travelers but loved being at home, sitting on their porch or at their kitchen window, watching the dozens of birds who flocked daily to their assorted feeders. They maintained massive vegetable and flower gardens, introduced all their grandchildren to country living, competed at lawn mowing with their dueling riding mowers, and after retirement were busier than ever with their many volunteer organizations. As a Lion, a Hope House volunteer, and a frequent visitor to the elderly and homebound, Gabrielle gave back to her community in innumerable ways. She created the Peace Pole monument on the village green and oversaw its constant upkeep. She co-founded the Foothills Regional Council of Ministry and was ever-present at the Holland Patent Presbyterian Church, serving on the Mission Committee, as a member of the choir, and as "kitchen czar" at the Park Coffeehouse. As someone who saw her life's purpose as serving those in need, one of her special skills was matching people to volunteer work. She also loved music and singing, especially harmony. For many years she performed as an alto in "Ken, Gaby, and John," followed by "Circle Five plus One." Her early training in dance and music (she auditioned at Juilliard) brought her joy her entire life, from dancing flamenco at the Steuben Grange back in the day to performing in local musicals to hours on the dance floor at a granddaughter's wedding three years ago. Gabrielle confided in her last days that she "never wanted to be famous, I just wanted a family to love." She adored her children and grandchildren, all of whom will miss her unique birthday cards, her focus on them as individuals, and –not least-her legendary love of butter and dark chocolate, along with her absolute inability not to start crying whenever she heard the song Teach Your Children. She was fiercely independent and lived life on her own terms right through her ninetieth year of life until the last few weeks. Gabrielle's love, total dependability, and joy in their presence were constants for everyone who knew her. We will miss her forever. Gabrielle was predeceased by her parents, Reine Laurel Ajas Kirsch and George Kirsch, and by her beloved husband Don. She is survived by her sister-in-law Marcia Deeb, her niece Leslie Deeb Venable, her four children, Alison (Mark Garry), Laurel (William Blackett), Holly (Marty Murtagh) and Douglas (Julie Caniglia), Swiss son Jean-Daniel Rey (Christiane Menegay), bonus daughter Bonnie Anken-Grogan, cherished grandchildren Luke O'Brien, Devon O'Brien, Min O'Brien, William Chiva Blackett, Donald Chivorn Blackett, Jason Steiner, McGhee Steiner, Marshall Steiner, Evan McGhee and Arthur McGhee, and great-granddaughter Willa Colfax. Family and friends are invited to attend her Memorial Service on Saturday, November 15, 2025 at 1:00 PM at the First Presbyterian Church of Holland Patent, 7835 Church St. Holland Patent. A reception will follow immediately afterward at 16 Stone Brewpub 9542 Main St in Holland Patent. Donations in her memory can be made to the 1) The First Presbyterian Church of Holland Patent, 7835 Church Street, Holland Patent, NY 13354, 2) Hope House, PO Box 161, Utica, NY 13503, hopehouseutica.org/donate/, and 3) Kiva, www.kiva.org/donate/supportus. Or, in lieu of a donation, keep an eye out for a lonely, or sad, or overwhelmed person, and do something nice for them. Online expressions of sympathy may be left at www.dimblebyfh.com