Daisy Stanley Obituary

June 9, 1918 - Dec. 23, 2008 Daisy Stanley, of San Carlos, passed away at her home on December 23, 2008. Daisy was born in San Francisco on June 9, 1918 and was the daughter of Angelo and Linda Albertazzi. She was preceded in death by her husband, Ralph, her son, Mike and her brothers, Louis and Victor. She is survived by her son, Mark (Robin) and daughter-in-law, Donna Stanley McEvoy, as well as 9 grandchildren and 23 great-grandchildren. Daisy knew from an early age that she was destined to work in medicine. In a 1938 San Francisco Chronicle interview, she said her goal was to help others maintain a healthy life through medicine. Affectionately known as "Dr. Daisy", she was a medical secretary for 71 years, retiring when she was 89. Whether painting dolls or creating elaborate Easter eggs, her artistic eye and attention to detail was constant. She even created custom bride dolls, whose face and gown matched the bride's. She was a Catholic, Methodist, Episcopalian, and ultimately, a Seventh Day Adventist, who loved to discuss theology and question established thinking. The family would especially like to thank Dr. Sidney Marchisin, her long-time boss and friend, for his unendingly compassionate care and friendship. At Daisy's insistence, no services will be held. Donations in Daisy's memory may be made to Amistad International, PO Box 455, Palo Alto, CA 94302 in support of their worldwide mission work, or Pathways Hospice Foundation, 585 North Mary Ave. Sunnyvale, CA 94085.

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Published by Bay Area News Group publication from Dec. 26 to Dec. 27, 2008.

Memories and Condolences
for Daisy Stanley

4 Entries

Barbara Snider

January 9, 2009

I have wonderful memories of very special lady. I met Daisy through Trish Wright, who was her dear friend, through Trish's Mom, Bebe. Daisy was so kind to Trish and also to me. She was there for me every minute during the time that Trish passed away in Oct. 2006, and I will be forever grateful.
I will miss her very much, but glad to know that she was at home with those she loved at the end.

My heart goes out to all of her family, and remember how many of us thought she was a wonderful lady, filled with warmth and love.

Barbara Snider

Gabrielle Blair

December 30, 2008

There are comments to the above post at the following link: http://tinyurl.com/7eztry

Gabrielle Blair

December 30, 2008

Grandma Daisy was a wonderful woman. Tall. Regal. In my memories she's always wearing purple with long strands of gorgeous grey pearls. And glasses on a chain. Incredibly hard-working — she retired when she was 89. Italian. My family grew up eating her version of focaccia — we call it figasa and it's a staple in our family recipes.

Daisy had an unsentimental streak a mile wide. An example: she was insistent that no burial or funeral services be held on her behalf. Which means her children and grand-children are having to figure how and when to mourn her on their own terms. As you can imagine, there have been lots of emails and phonecalls and stories exchanged over the last couple of weeks.

A second example. When I found myself nearly engaged and pondering what I wanted my wedding ring to look like, I called Grandma and asked if I could please have a piece of jade from her rock collection, with the idea that I would take it to a jewelry designer and have something wonderful made. Both Grandpa Ralph and Grandma Daisy had collected and polished rocks as a hobby, and I knew she had some beautiful pieces of unpolished jade sitting in their workshop.

Daisy did send her prettiest piece of apple jade. And a gorgeous oval jade ring set in silver that she designed and made herself. Also. She sent her wedding ring. Because (remember that unsentimental streak) Grandpa Ralph had died a couple of years earlier and "the ring wasn't doing her any good anymore."

The ring is a small diamond (I have zero knowledge about carats or cuts or clarity or things like that — I never actually went shopping for a wedding ring and still know nothing about them) set in platinum with delicate cutwork in the metal. I loved it instantly and all plans for jade rings immediately went out the window as I adopted Daisy's wedding ring as my own. I couldn't believe how lucky I was.

My father died almost a dozen years ago. So I'm not mourning for his loss right now. But I am mourning for my uncle Mark's loss. His father died. His brother died — his only sibling. And now his mother. I remember the feeling of orphan-ness I felt at my father's death. And was completely surprised by. Because I was 22 and thought the whole orphan-concept should no longer apply. I'm betting Uncle Mark is feeling pretty orphaned right now. Even though he's been more caretaker, less child, for many years.

The thing I keep thinking about the most, is how hard it must have been to be Grandma Daisy, raising a stepchild during the 40's and 50's — when there were no books or support groups to offer advice. And when nobody really even talked about such things. The basic story: Grandpa Ralph and Grandma Rudi married young, had my father and divorced shortly afterward. Grandpa Ralph took custody of my father and then married Daisy and had another son, my uncle Mark. My father was raised by Daisy and Ralph with his brother Mark. But my father would spend the summers with his birth mother, Grandma Rudi — who lived a couple of towns away and also went on to re-marry and have more children.

Seriously, I can't imagine how awkward and painful that whole situation must have been. For my father, for sure. But also for Daisy — the new wife and step-mother — in particular. I'm so grateful to her for doing her best to do right by my father, even though it was hard. He grew to be a hard-working, capable man who raised 8 hardworking, capable children. So, yay for Daisy!

I still have that pretty piece of apple jade. Sometimes, I think I'm almost as unsentimental as Grandma Daisy, but maybe the time has come to make something lovely from it.

Donna McEvoy

December 26, 2008

I will forever be grateful to Daisy Stanley for her influence in my life and the lives of my husband and children. She and Ralph raised their boys to love life, to welcome new things, to be responsible and to take advantage of opportunities. The generations to follow her are doing just that. THANK YOU, Daisy!

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