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John Julius Falencki

John Falencki Obituary

FALENCKI John Julius. Friends and colleagues of John Julius Falencki mourn the untimely death of our beloved ``Janic'' in the water off West Palm Beach, FL. We express our sympathy to his mother Karen, his wife Maureen and his children Emily, Jonah and Andy. John was a pioneer-one of the first residency trained family doctors in Manhattan. Many followed in his footsteps as he continued through teaching students and residents to expand the field and its influence. John was a renaissance man; a philosopher, healer, physician, businessman, farmer, family therapist and homeopath. He was relentlessly curious and the breadth of his interests amazed those around him. He lived in awe of the homeostasis between man and nature. He loved his family, the ocean, mushroom collecting, and through the Cascade Farm, was sharing this awe with schoolchildren, people with disabilities and others. John, we grieve the loss of your love, wise counsel, friendship and teachings. You live on in our hearts and memories. Steven Tamarin, M.D. Neil Calman, M.D. And the entire Institute for Urban Family Health

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by New York Times on Jan. 5, 2004.

Memories and Condolences
for John Falencki

Sponsored by Village Family Practice.

39 Entries

Susanna Cuyler

September 27, 2017

We met outside of Trinity, Dalton high schools. Reuniting at a
movie memorable was our laughing. I wish he'd told me more
about his family before/during wwII. Virginia Reath told me
he'd died. I showed Maureen drawing C.Schlesinger made of him. Henry Munson was his good friend at Trinity.

Gayl Forman

May 9, 2004

About 20 years ago, I had quite a gratifying gift-giving experience with Dr. Falencki. Dr. Falencki sat with our offering on his lap, first telling us that since it was within a day or so of his birthday, December 15th, he had the joy of also regarding this as a birthday gift. He took an extraordinary amount of time with the process of opening his present. He picked up the box, shook it next to his ear, and sitting back in his chair, reflected on what story it’s sound could tell him of the contents. Next, he put the gift up to his nose pondering what it’s scent could reveal. Then lobbing guesses as to what lay within the box based on it’s size and dimensions, he included us in a discussion of his reflections, making the gift opening not just about him, but about us as well. Only after all of those preliminaries did he carefully unfold the petals of the gift’s wrappings, the final product not nearly as important as the process.

At first I thought this was all a play for my pre-school child, but later, and especially now, I think this was a crystallization not only of how he savored life, but how he brought issues into his consciousness, turning over the various clues, objectively weighing them in an effort to put the pieces of the jigsaw puzzle together, forming a likely picture, unveiling the story of whatever malady brought us into his office. Always, he would involve us as active participants, sincerely listening to our view, respecting our input as an important piece of the puzzle. His nonjudgmental attitude encouraged us to bare all, availing him of as much information as possible for calm examination. Only then would he offer his advice in treatment.

Gayl Forman

May 7, 2004

Hospital procedure demanded that those coming into the emergency room with breathing trouble be given a chest x-ray. Never mind that our young son had only days before been lavished with such treatment. If our boy continued on his present course, his weekly, if not bi-weekly, middle-of-the-night emergency room encounters with asthma would mean frequent exposure to radiation. Frightful visions loomed. We came to the emergency room in order to receive help for an acute situation, but the potential of hospital procedure producing harmful long-term side effects, or worse still, cancer, was pushing us to do all we could to prevent strict adherence to the rules. Under this duress, we consulted with Dr. Falencki by telephone. He persuaded the emergency room resident that an x-ray was unnecessary. Dr. Falencki explained to us that the hospital was trying to rule out Tuberculosis. As the treatment for TB would be antibiotics and our toddler was already on antibiotics for chronic infected eczema, he reasoning there was no need for an x-ray. Likewise, in this way Dr. Falencki at other times advocated on our son's behalf, interceding between hospital staff and us, enabling emergency room visits and hospital admissions to go smoothly and expeditiously. His patient's overall health was always Dr. Falencki's main concern. The big picture was paramount. If life is the game of baseball, Dr. Falencki was base. When we arrived safely on base, we could take a deep breath, relax, and then re-energize to make it across home plate.

My family and I extend our deepest hearfelt sympathy to his family, his mother Karen, wife Maureen and children Emily, Jona, and Andy and to all of his colleagues at The Village Famiy Practice who have over the years, and still do take such good care of us.

It is heartening to know that Dr. Falencki touched so many of us with his fine example that his legacy will live on even as we miss his earthly presence so terribly.

Aimee Ross

April 12, 2004

It has taken me a very long time to write this rememberance of John Falencki as I had many years of memories to sort through. I will treasure the time I knew him always. Our condolences to Maureen and his children, our thoughts are with you.

John was my doctor all my adult life - from the time he started his practice on Washington Square until the last time I saw him in his homeopathy office last year. Through the years he helped me with both difficult and joyous times in my life. He took blood samples for our marriage license; he helped me through a difficult pregnancy and took real delight in being Nicole's doctor through her first year,until his heart surgery; he was tickled to take out his little used scalpel and remove a cyst from David's back. I never failed to feel better, physically and emtionally, after a visit with John. He was eminently sensible and reliably and I had total confidence in his opinions and the course he suggested. I will miss his good humor and good sense and the terrific person he was.

Linda Smith

March 8, 2004

It is difficult to find words to accurately convey the sense of comfort, confidence and well-being I've known because I've been under the care of John Falencki and the other professionals he engaged in his practice. Even when in serious or emergency situations, I've felt that I was supported by the very best minds and hearts within John's practice.

My condolences to his family and his friends and co-workers in this tremendous loss. I hope that they will all take comfort in the wonderful and profound contribution he made to so many others in his lifetime.

Sincerely,

Linda Smith

John Rounds

February 12, 2004

Back when I began taking my kids to Village Family Practice some years ago, I wanted to call to make an appointment, but had misplaced the card with the Family Practice phone number on it. So I looked up Doctor Falencki in the Yellow Pages and gave him a call. It turns out that I had dialled his HOME number, and when I called I actually woke him up! He was amused by my embarrassment, and we went on to have an enjoyable conversation. Conversation is what Doctor Falencki was all about: our visits to see him were always part of an ongoing conversation. Whimsical, warm and witty, he was a man who always looked ahead -- yet paradoxically, his practice was old-fashioned in the best sense, the closest thing to receiving a house call amidst the bustle of our times. My family and I miss him very much. What a good man he was!

mandy garber

February 12, 2004

Many fond memories from the 2000/2001 bioethics course.

Chuck Macdonald

February 12, 2004

Just this December I had an appointment with Dr. Falencki for my fifty year check-up. With my chart in his hand we had an uplifting conversation about my family, how wonderful they are, how lucky and greatful I am. We talked about a half an hour then he said "So what can I do for you, why are you here?"

I said, "I'm turning fifty"

He said, "Have you seen Avenue Q? Why don't you go and see it?"

I said "O.K."

It worked!

I wasn't going to turn fifty for another year, I had mis-calculated my age. When we met by chance a month later, on a subway platform, and I told him this, he said "it's a gift, you have been given a year. What are you going to do with it?"

We both laughed and talked of holiday plans, families and wishes. The train came and parted our ways. Truth is John is the gift, still, ever, and always.

Julianne Garry

February 11, 2004

I met Dr. Falencki when I first started working in NYC as a young woman and became very ill on New Year's Eve Day with a terrible flu. Dr. Falencki called me every day for three days to check up on me. He was my doctor for many years after that and helped me navigate the usual obstacles of my twenties (even got me to quit smoking permanently) until I moved to CT where I have still never met another Dr as concerned, interested or caring as he was. Dr. Falencki was a rare find in that he always focused on the "patient" and not just the illness. He will be missed. My thoughts and prayers go out to his family.

Arthur Stern

February 11, 2004

On behalf of all of my partners at Cogswell Realty Group, we are extremely saddened to hear about the sudden loss of such a wonderful human being. John, may now never know this (although I suspect he did) but he is one of those rare individuals that made a difference. Not only professionally, but also as a person.

I will never forget the lunch when I approached John about the notion of transferring the management of his families buildings to our soon to be opened firm. He agreed and for many years we had successful partnership. Without his support, we would not be where we are today. One never forgets that and I want his family to know that we are forever grateful for the trust you gave us. John was always cheerful, insightful and as I said earlier, one of the truly good guys. We want you to know that there is a group of 50 people working for our company that would not be in business but for people like John. We are deeply saddened and wish all of his family members our warmest condolences.

Claire Frankel

February 11, 2004

I was very shocked and then sad, to hear of my doctor's untimely death. My heart goes out, most of all, to his family who will miss his love and presence every day. His colleagues, too, at Village Family Practice, feel his loss every day. I was a patient of Dr. Falencki's from the time that I moved to NYC in 1981. I will miss his kindness and remember him always.

Ted Shapiro

February 11, 2004

Even though we were roughly the same age, I always called him "Dr. Falencki". He always came out to the waiting room and said, "MIS-ter Shapiro, come in!” I laugh, thinking about this little ritual.

I'm another 20+ year patient who feels very grateful to have known him. He was a great doctor and a caring man and I’ll really miss him. I hope these thoughts and my condolences are comforting to his wife and children.

Andy Benejam

February 10, 2004

I met John in 1995 at Phillips Family Practice, N.Y.C. where he was a preceptor. The news about his death was shocking. I became saddened. He was an excellent teacher, a colleague and a respectable friend. He was an empathetic listener. I admired his dedication to integrate biopsychosocial interventions into his practice and how to teach the understanding of biopsychosocial dynamics to physicians. He will be greatly missed. My condolences go out to his wife Maureen and children.

Barbara Ashley

February 10, 2004

Although I had not known John for long, the news of his death was a terrible shock and personal loss. John was my landlord...(how many New Yorker's can say they feel a genuine sense of loss at the passing of their landlord??), but he was so much more than that. Instead of the usual dentists and podiatrists, John actively introduced alternative practioners and yoga/Pilatese facilities to the building, making it feel like a place of health and healing. John's warmth, gentleness and constant interest in improving the lives of others set a tone in our building and transformed it into a small, gentle village in the midst of NYC.

John was a truly extraordinary person who used his life to make a real difference. He was an inspiration and will be sorely missed.

Ray Glassman

February 10, 2004

For over 20 years, I've always been proud to call John Falencki my doctor. He was indeed the consummate professional with superb diagnostic and medical skills.

But he was always much more than just my doctor: he exuded a reassuring calmness, a source of genuine warmth and compassion with every visit and phone call, with every illness, large and small through the years.

He was the young doctor, new to the city, who had just begun his practice on Washington Square and who, for each and every day, through the weekend, and for over a week, opened his office door to re-dress a severe burn wound from a cup of spilled tea. Most recently his was the reassuring voice on the phone 3 or 4 times through the night and early morning as he convinced his panicked and reluctant patient with shortness of breath to get to the hospital with a case of pneumonia.

And with all the events in between.... John Falencki was truly a rare individual with great humor, wit, and compassion. I will greatly miss him.

Ben Kinmont

February 9, 2004

We were very saddened to hear of John's death. Along with Jerry he took care of each member of our family, in the case of our children, since birth. John was a doctor we could *always* count on. His kindness, gentle manner, and medical ability were all something our family looked forward to. We will greatly miss him.

Ben, Naomi, Ian, & Natasha Kinmont Huperts.

Robert Lapides

February 8, 2004

My wife and I were stunned to hear of John Falencki's death, and very saddened. Although I was his patient for many years, I can't say I knew him well. What can I say is that I was always struck by the sanity of the office he maintained and his opposition to pretense and pretentiousness. I also noticed, particularly when I'd pass him on the street, that he kept getting younger in spirit. I had the sense that he was happy. We send our condolences to his family and to Jerry and Helena, his associates.

Suzanne Jones-Dunkins

February 6, 2004

My husband and I were very sad to hear about Dr. Falencki's passing. Though the primary care doctor of our 3 1/2 yr.-old-daughter Sasha is Dr. Jerry Clements, we did on occasion see Dr. Falencki and had occasion to speak to him on the phone in weekend emergencies. He was always very helpful and reassuring. And, whatever I know now about homeopathic medicine, I learned from Dr. Falencki. He took a lot of time to find the best alternative remedies and would always make sure to call us the next day to see how the remedy worked for Sasha. We always appreciated him for his helpfulness and professionalism.

Jane schiller

February 6, 2004

I experienced great shock and sadness to

learn of Dr. Falencki's passing. I was

referred to him by a friend many years ago

when his office was by Washington Square

Park, and he has been my doctor ever since. He was always kind, gentle, a good

listener. very funny and a great diagnostician. I always knew I was in good

hands. I felt so very lucky to have found

him in NYC--we were both from Michigan.

My warm and loving sympathies go to

Maureen, his wife, and his three young children. He will always be with us in

memory.

Andrew Miller

February 5, 2004

I have been a patient of Dr. Falencki's partner, Jerry Clements, for nearly 15 years. A few years ago, I became terribly ill on December 30th. By New Year's Day, I had had a fever of 104 for nearly three days. I couldn't move, and my throat was the color of tacky nail polish.

I called the office, which, of course, was closed. Dr. Clements was away on holiday, and Dr. Falencki was on call. I had never even met him, but he phoned me back almost immediately. He sounded and acted like mine was just another routine call in an uneventful day -- instead of an interruption of his holiday.

John gave me some very good fever-reducing advice, and phoned in a prescription for antibiotics to a pharmacy that would deliver. To my surprise, he phoned me back a few hours later to find out how I was doing. He seemed genuinely concerned. That's the kind of doctor John Falencki was.

I saw him a few times after that, whenever Dr. Clements was on vacation or out of the office. We had several interesting talks about holistic medicine. I've met many doctors, and I've noticed that arrogance seems to be a required class in medical school. Dr. Falencki failed that class. His curiosity, openness to new ideas, and ability to hear what his patient was telling him were rare qualities indeed.

More doctors should be like him. He was totally cool.

jerry clements

February 3, 2004

John's family is thankful for all the entries thus far to this Guest Book. In a few months, we will make a bound copy for the family and one to have on view at Village Family Practice

We have scheduled a memorial service at Judson Church, Washington Square South at Thompson Street, on Wednesday, February 11, from 6:30 to 8:30 PM.

The family would like all to know about a fund dedicated to him.

The John Falencki Memorial Fund for the Promotion of Family Medicine in New York City has been established at the Institute for Urban Family Health, 16 East 16th Street, NY, NY 10003.

Tax-deductible donations may be sent there, payable to IUFH (memo should state "John Falencki Memorial Fund").

His love lives on.

Barbara Harris

February 3, 2004

Dr. John Falencki was my doctor for 20 years in NYC. He listened, he advised & he kept me healthy. I trusted him and loved his easy gentle manner. He was concerned, thorough and knowledgeable. I felt confident that I was in "good hands." whenever I had each check-up. I can't believe he is gone. He was so young & had so much to live for. His brief life was dedicated to keeping his patients healthy & informed. My condolences to his wife, Maureen, and his children. John was a wonderfully compassionate human being. I will miss him.

Sr.Barbara Leonardo

February 3, 2004

I have known John as a friend for over twenty years...He was a rare individual with a strong mind and a gentle heart....He had the greatest respect and REVERENCE for all he met.

Petrina Kulek

February 2, 2004

I was deeply saddened to hear of Dr. Falencki's passing this weekend. My thoughts and prayers are with his family.

I consider myself lucky to have found his practice through Oxford when I landed my first job out of college. Because of Dr. Falencki, I found the best care through Village Family Practice.

I had a period of unemployment and when I finally got a new job, I was questioned of my absence from said Practice. When I confessed I wasn't sure I could have afforded the care, I was told, "We would have worked with you."

That brought a tear to my eye. It's wonderful to know that he cared so much about his patients.

Ann Finneran

February 2, 2004

My husband Richard Seehausen were dismayed to hear the news of Dr John Falencki's death, and wish to add to the heartfelt condolences offered to his family and associates. Even though we have lived 90 miles upstate for 2+ years, we have been reticent to find another doctor's office. The care and circumspection of Dr Falencki and his office were even evidenced by the waiting room literature, which indicated to me that their concerns extended well beyond the office walls and into the world itself. I knew when I first waited there that here was one medical office ruled by the principles of healing, and not by market forces. We appreciated Dr. Falencki's droll manner and common sense, and we will always be grateful for the support and care concerning our plans to adopt our daughter Nina from China. Thank you for the opportunity to express our appreciation. The world truly is a lesser place for its loss of this noble doctor, but we are all better for having known him even a little.

Debbie Johnson

February 2, 2004

My husband and I brought our entire family to Village Family Practice over 10 years ago. My children were in preschool when we first met Dr. Falencki; they are now in high school. Dr. Falencki immediately made us feel at home. He was always so courteous, warm,professional and reassuring. My son had to have an operation when he was 5 years old and Dr. Falencki not only recommended the surgeon he let me cry for 20 minutes in his office before moving onto other patients. We have truly lost a precious jewel on this earth. He will never be 'gone' to my family because he will always live in our hearts and souls. To his wife and children my family extends it's deepest sympathy and we will 'forever' pray that your hearts heal from the loss of a such a wonderful husband and father.

Karen Miles

February 2, 2004

I learned of Dr. Falencki's passing over the weekend and am so shocked and saddened. I have been going to his medical clinic for many years. When I had the occasion to see him I was always impressed by his vast knowledge and reassured with his kind manner. He was a big shining star. We will miss him.

Alex von Bidder

February 1, 2004

John was a special man and a special friend.

Some years ago I was looking for a classic sailboat and

was given Dr. Falencki's name. I called him and we made a

date for him to take me out on his boat. On a cloudy Sunday

morning his son Jona, John and I set sail in a steady breeze on

Gardener's bay. He showed me the ropes and we talked passionately

about his beautiful craft. Jona got hungry and we returned to the house

where Maureen generously invited me to sit down and join them for

breakfast. They welcomed me like an old friend.

After a while, John caught me gazing longingly out the window.

He said: "Should we go out again?" "Yes" I answered and we

rigged the boat one more time and sailed all day until sunset;

getting to know one another. Enjoying the quiet. Breathing in

the wind and the sea. Loving every minute. A perfect day.

Sometimes you meet friends just like that, knowing that they are

unique and touch your soul like no other ever did.

John Falencki was such a friend for me.

I became his patient and he my client at the Four Seasons Restaurant.

I am saddened by his passing and will miss him. Cloudy days

and steady breezes will remind me of his goodness and his love of life.

Patricia Notopoulos

February 1, 2004

As a patient for over twenty years, the news of Dr. Falencki's death was, of course, a terrible shock that has engendered deep feelings of loss. The commonalty of descriptions of Dr. Falencki in this book - gentle, patient, intelligent, and witty - bear true witness to the humane, respectful and unselfish manner in which he treated his patients. How refreshing it was to hear him say, "What would you like to do?" In the end, I find myself uplifted by my good fortune in having had this extraordinary man cross my path in life.

Ronald Grace

January 31, 2004

I first saw Dr. Falencki over 17 years ago. My wife and I both went to him when we felt we needed his gentle and reassuring help. His good humor and his honest and direct manner were so unique in a world of hurried and quick talking doctors. He seemed eternally young and his death is a shock and saddens me. I will always remember him and his smile. Thanks Doctor for your care and your integrity.

Keely Garfield - Ra

January 31, 2004

My husband and I deeply mourn the loss of such a great human-being and healer. John's intelligent, gentle and quick-witted spirit informed all his interactions with us during the many years we were priviledged to call him our doctor. He never failed to take us seriously, make us laugh, make connections, and make us feel better all in the same instance, and without ever hurrying us. He always remembered, and with genuine interest, asked about our lives, work, family. He was not affraid to share himself. He talked to me about my children even though they were not in his care, was inquisitive about my experiences with acupuncture, took the time to see several of my dance performances, and gave me his cell phone number when I was sick incase of emergencies. He didn't miss a thing - told us to go home and rest or sent us to see exactly the person we needed to help us. We trusted him implicitly. John was the embodiement of kindness, patience, and loving care. John truly attended to the body, mind and soul of his patients. He will be sorely missed. Jim and I offer our sincerest sympathies to John's family and colleagues.

Margaret Segall

January 30, 2004

As one of his patients, I will miss Dr. Falenki very much. His comon sense, relaxed humor and personal interest are all too rare. My condolences to his family, friends and colleagues.

Lauren Peden

January 30, 2004

Like everyone else, I was completely shocked and terribly saddened by the news of Dr. Falencki's sudden death. When my husband and I moved to Manhattan in the mid-'80s and were looking for a family physician, my best friend insisted we go see her doctor of many years, Dr. Falencki (to whom she had been referred by her older sister, who had also been a long-time patient). We loved him immediately and were under his care for nearly fifteen years. He was kind, smart, caring and funny and had a calming presence that worked wonders when you were feeling under the weather. I always respected his non-alarmist attitude and the fact that he did not dispense medicine like candy (he pretty much gave me the same reassuring advice any time I came in complaining of a common cold: "I can prescribe an antiobiotic and you'll get better within ten days, or I can *not* prescribe an antiobiotic and you'll get better within ten days." He was always right--whether I opted for the Rx or not). He was equally astute when treating more serious ailments, and was always open to trying alternative or homeopathic therapies, which I appreciated. My husband Craig and I held Dr. Falencki in very high regard, and will miss him terribly. He is in our thoughts and prayers, and we extend our deepest sympathy to his friends, colleagues and, most especially, to his wife and children.

Nancy Diekmann

January 16, 2004

Our whole family was shocked and saddened to learn of John's death -- we were all patients of John's (my husband and son) for many years, and though we only saw him maybe once or twice a year, he was a person who held such a valued and special place in our hearts. He was the rare doctor -- he would stand quietly and listen to what you had to say, then pause and think about it, and then respond. He didn't always give you the answer you wanted, he didnt' always agree with you, but you always felt you had to been listened to, with care.

When we moved from Massachusetts to New York, John's family practice office was like an oasis in this city of specialists.

And he had the same patience with our young son as he had with us -- he was able to match our son's adolescent humor with his own gentle brand of humor, and Michael trusted him completely.

Our deepest sympathies to his family and colleagues -- we will miss him so very much.

Charles Watson

January 7, 2004

I knew John well in college, before either of us went to medical school and was delighted to find him in practice in the city. Though our spheres haven't come together very often, I well remember John's interest in big questions and his patience with others who asked or worked together with him on answers.

I extend my condolences to his colleagues, his patients and his family. Please know that many of us who've recently heard of his untimely death mourn him and regret time we didn't find to spend with him.

John Falencki, MD, Friend, Healer, Family Man

January 7, 2004

Elizabeth Sommer

January 5, 2004

I was so saddened to hear about John's untimely death. In the years I worked with him, I was always impressed by his intelligence and kindness. His quick wit would bring laughter to our meetings. My sincerest condolences to Karin, Maureen and his children.

Liz Feldman

January 5, 2004

As a medical student at Mount Sinai in the early 80's, I was profoundly influenced by my time with John Falencki in his office. I chose to become a family physician and strived to emulate him and the kind of physician, healer and human being that he was. More recently, we re-connected at STFM meetings as family medicine educators. I am stunned and deeply saddened to read of his death. I remember his and Maureen's hospitality in their Fifth Avneue home over 20 years ago and grieve for Maureen's loss and that of their children and family. My sympathies are with them.

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