Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg
Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg
Obituary
Guest Book
Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg Obituary
This obituary was originally published in the Richmond Times-Dispatch.
To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.
Lynda Schedler
March 16, 2023
Pam embodied the spirit of the Fan and it was a privilege to know.
Kory Isenberg
March 17, 2021
I miss you so much. You missed the pandemic, you would have hated it, but I picture all the new art you could have made during lockdown. Eliza stepped in and made a ton, her pice of the picture of you, Amy and Buffy is my favorite. I love you so much
Lynda Schedler
March 16, 2021
You were the best. A great neighbor and friend.
Bud Minor
March 16, 2021
Miss you down here.
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Amy Sullivan
December 6, 2012
~I have been thinking about you, these past few days.~I'm sure you know this.~I'm going to put a new frame on the angel drawing you gave me.~
Mark Dunn
March 19, 2009
I never met Pam, but her brother Kevin was one of my best friends. I will always miss him as I am sure y'all will always miss Pam.
Buffy Harwood
September 1, 2008
Happy Birthday Oma!
You sure would be mad that Kory and I moved to St. Louis.
Amy Sullivan
October 1, 2007
Pam was a beautiful person inside and out. I sat and had many a cup of coffee with her for many years. She always had invaluable advice, she was the first person I told I was pregnant and I will never forget the pure JOY on her face! She gifted my child with a Guardian Angle drawing that hangs in my home.I Loved Pam,, Amy Gethins Sullivan
Emily Righter
September 1, 2005
Happy Birthday Pam. Ethan and I talk about you everyday. I am wondering what we would have done this year. No matter what we did, you would have looked your fabulous self. I miss you so much. Love, Emily
TIA BOWLES-GRYDER
August 31, 2005
KORY-
I ONLY HAD THE PLEASURE OF MEETING YOUR MOTHER ONCE, SO UNFORTUNEATELY I DIDN'T GET TO KNOW JUST HOW WONDERFUL SHE WAS. I DID HOWEVER GET THE OPPORTUNITY TO KNOW YOU; AND WITHOUT PAM THERE WOULD BE NO KORY. MAY HER LEGACY LIVE ON THROUGH YOU AND OTHER LOVED ONES.
tony & marguerite
April 5, 2005
We were really sorry to hear about Pam's death. It's hard to believe that so many years have gone by. We miss you all.We have lots of good memories from when you all were young (er). and we still have the tissue box upon which Pam painted a rendention of our old blue house on W 28th street. Its on the shelf above my computer. Can't believe I remember a couple of those pictures you posted. Love to you all. Tony and Marguerite.
Renee Goodman
April 3, 2005
I was the blessed one to do Pams hairstyling for a while, not only hers the grooms on thier weeding day! The last time i saw her she was at my Clarins counter reminding me of not only that i was pregnate the last time she saw me before this day.Many years had passed needless to say. So in a short time we cought each other up on all the good, bad and ugly. In life i will surly miss her in mine.
Renee Goodman
Donna Knicely
April 3, 2005
Bill (Jordan) and I were so sad to see that Pam had died. However, what a wonderful obituary! It was just like her. Bill and I remember Pam from her days in the 70s/80s as a parent at Fox School. Although we hadn't seen her in years she was someone who was never forgotten then or will be no. We are so sorry for your loss. Bill (former Fox principal) and Donna
Nicole Levenberg
March 30, 2005
Buffy, Ethan, Amy, and Kory,
I have such fond memories of coffee outings, trips to Joe's Inn and hanging out at your mom's place in the English Village. Pam always had a way of putting a positive spin on the things that where happening in my life, even when I found it hard to do that for myself.
I will miss her dearly!
Nicole Levenberg
Rebecca Cooke
March 30, 2005
Amy,
I was so sorry to hear of your mother's sudden death. I have read this guest book and, although I did not know her, I can tell she was a very special person. May she live on in your memory and in the hearts and minds of all who know and love her. Peace to you and to your siblings at this difficult time,
Your sister-in-law,
Rebecca
Katharina Bergdoll
March 29, 2005
To Pam's family: I was stunned to have heard via 'phone from Emily that Pam had died suddenly....I'm so sorry for your and my loss...she was a dear friend for most of the 16 years I've lived in Richmond and I am grateful to have had that warm friendship,along with her wonderful sense of humour,keen artistic eye and sensitivity to the emotional state of people around her. Though I'd not seen much of her of late, she was and will be, often in my thoughts.
eileen connors
March 29, 2005
Colorful stylish beauty girl you painted fantasies
for you and me.
Buffy, Ethan, Amy, and Kory,
My deepest sympathies.
Pam II
March 28, 2005
Dear Pam and Kids....
(I include your Mom because I know she is looking over my shoulder as I write this.) What a great obit-formational! Her life was wonderful. She was sooooo proud of all of you. I'll miss seeing her on my walks and talking with her to catch up on what was going on in her life.
Pam-II
Sally Provo
March 28, 2005
I worked as a waitress at the New York Deli for nine years. It would have been impossible for me to not know Pam. Single poached egg. Wheat toast. Decaf coffee. She occasionally cheated with a bit of jam. I don't remember when we met, but she was at my wedding, my baby shower. We took a memorable train trip to DC to the National Gallery.
At my wedding Pam took the opportunity to check out every gravestone in my family's cemetery. My mom ( still living) has purchased her gravestone and has it over in a corner facing the wrong way. Pam discovered it and thought they might be related---my mother's mother's maiden name was Kirkland. Pam was unphased that my mother's gravestone was already there--just a new connection.
My heart goes out to Pam's children. It is hard no matter what.
Sally
Anna Skinner nee Kevorkian
March 28, 2005
Buffy and Amy,
Ellie told me about your mother's passing. I was so very sorry to hear this. My sincerest condolences to both of you and your siblings and your loved ones.
Rossie Hutcheson
March 28, 2005
Dear Buff, Ethan, Amy and Kory,
I was saddened to read Pam’s obituary in the paper. She was such a wonderful, vibrant person. I have such fond memories of her first from days at Camp Hilbert, then the JCC and later from the Fan.
With sympathy,
Lawrence Proman
March 28, 2005
walking vacant morning Richmond streets
after Martha's death
a smiling face greeted me
weekends in Carytown were never the same
I would seek out Pam
a few words, a large smile, a hug
the day was now okay
the nights were bareable
love is a gift
Pam you were our gift
Susan Svendsen and John Birch
March 26, 2005
My first memories of Pam were ages ago, when my son Josh [Lutz] was at Fox School with Amy. Through the years, I loved that in our brief encounters she always had good ideas,bright thoughts, and some interesting piece of information that she was ready to share.
John and I are thinking of you as we each remember Pam so fondly. Your Mom had a wonderful presence, and her remembrance will inspire those she touched to take more joy in the uniqueness of everyday.
Helen Link-Corbett
March 25, 2005
Dear Buffy, Ethan, Amy, and Kory,
We are so sorry for you loss. Through Buff and Ethan we heard many a "Pam" story - the one that sticks out most had to do with a Thanksgiving turkey. Every time that we visited Richmond we would always run into Pam at one coffee shop or another. It's difficult to come to grips with the fact that we won't be able to do that anymore. Please know that our thoughts are with you all,
Love the Links and the Corbetts
Linda Mead
March 25, 2005
I met Pam about 18 years ago while drinking coffee in Carytown. A year later she introduced me to my husband. So, we really have to thank "Tante Pam" for our son, Johannes. During our last visit we set up the little triangular table (which like everything in Pam's home has a story) with everything for our "Kaffee Stunde". Unfortunately, one of us sat on one of the many pillows on Pam's couch which somehow tipped the table and we all just watched as cups, saucers, coffee, cookies, milk, and sugar tumbled downward. We will always remember Pam standing there, paper towels in hand laughing that laugh of hers saying, "Isn't this great? We're making a new memory. I love it!" Pam, you are a wonderful memory and we treasure the day we met you.
Linda, Hans and Johannes
eddie peters
March 25, 2005
from the cave of time
into open eternity
a vision moves
through the gate
with grace
now and always
the melody, the breeze
fills each open space
refreshment, new life,
a drop of wine
in a crystal bowl
of spring water.
eddie peters
Josh Lutz
March 25, 2005
I first met Pam when I was at Fox School with Amy. I grew up in the Fan and saw Pam often. Later when I bagged groceries at Ukrops in high school, whenever she checked out at one of the registers, the other baggers and I would push eachother out of the way and race to bag her groceries. The ten minutes it would take to carry her bags out to the car were the best ten minutes of the day and all of us knew it. The Fan was just cooler with Pam in it. I will miss her very much. My deepest sympathies. Your family's loss is our loss.
sarah lichter
March 25, 2005
I first met Pam Nov.1st,2001 (all saints day) at etc. for the home when she was moving, and spent time with her every month since than unless she was in Boulder.We have cried at the saddest of times (the loss of her brother,the enigma of romantic love,) and laughed at the best of times, (triumph over difficult times the succeess's of our loved ones and the joy of inner peace )Her loss is a very difficult for the entire staff as etc. as we loved her very much and looked forward to every visit. There have been tears shed over the last 24 hours,her kindness will not be forgotton, neither will her remarkable ability to find my keys everytime I missed place them. I am confident her journey continues on a higher plane, and for that I am joyous. God bless the entire family.
Weston Walters
March 25, 2005
Pam's smile..., you can't help but smile back and know you mean it. That was my first impression.
Sonja Schedler
March 25, 2005
My mom, sister and I tried to come up with out favorite Ms. Isenberg story. Hands down, it is the one about the Thanksgiving turkey that caught on fire, ended up in the bath tub, and then everyone went to the Jefferson for dinner.
Another favorite is a Fox School pot luck where she is making her way to the buffet table, holding high above everyone's head, a Domino's Pizza. We all wish our mom could be that cool.
We also fondly remember the big blue car (when you all lived on Park, I think) with the bumper sticker that said "Chaos."
Our memories of Ms. Isenberg are so vivid, time travels too fast.
I am so sorry.
Much love,
Sonja Schedler
P.S. thank you for the website, what a wonderful idea.
Andrea Schedler Kibe
March 24, 2005
I am so saddened to hear of Pam's passing. I haven't lived in Richmond for 15 years, however, she is a part of many funny memories of growing up in the Fan. Pam was such a part of our lives that at my wedding in 1997, my father gave a toast in which he talked about Pam and her three criteria for choosing a husband. They were: 1) How does he treat his mother and grandmother? (because that is how he is going to treat you) 2)How are his table manners? (because you don't want to spend your life across the table from someone chewing with their mouth open)and 3) How does he act in rush hour traffic? (because life is full of bumps in the road) Even though she wasn't physically present, she was there in spirit. As you can see from this guest book, her spirit has touched us all.
Bill beville
March 24, 2005
First, let me say that I hate my eyebrows! They are thick and bushy and the older I become the more unrudely they behave. Last Friday,the guy who cuts my hair did a real trim job on them and I thought maybe he trimmed a bit too much but I would have to live with it.
Later, I ran into Pam at Ukrops on Cary and we chatted for a few minutes and as we parted, she says,"Nice eyebrows!" NO ONE and I mean no one has ever made a positive comment about my eyebrows. So, all weekend, I am being very vain and looking in the mirror and checking out the brows!
Pam had a way of making you feel good about yourself after you left her presence. My eyebrows will never be the same, thanks to Pam!
Sherri Hutchinson
March 24, 2005
I had only met Pam once, but from all of the stories I have read on this website, I would have loved the chance to know her longer or maybe just hang out with her for a while. I have known Buffy and Kory for a while now and I must say that Pam raised two of the coolest daughters I have ever met.
My thoughts and prayers are with the family.
Lynda Schedler
March 24, 2005
Dear Buffy, Ethan, Amy, and Cory--My heart goes out to you all as I try to imagine what a loss you have suffered. I simply canot invision the Fan and Hanover Avenue without your Mom. She, in fact, made the Fan the Fan and I know much she will be missed. Love to you all--Lynda Schedler
Bobbi Proctor
March 24, 2005
Dear Buffy, Kory, Amy, & Ethan:
While I have the great pleasure of working with both Buffy and Kory, I did not get the chance to meet your wonderful mother. I do know she is still here in each and every member of her family and her spirit lives on in the Fan.
God Bless.
Julie Flenner
March 24, 2005
I have been struck, as I have read this guestbook and looked at the information on pamisenberg.com and the pictures posted there, by what an amazing spirit this woman clearly had and managed to impart to her family. I am disappointed that I never met her, but glad that I work with her daughters Buffy and Kory and get a glimpse of that spirit through them. Pam will clearly be missed by many. My thoughts are with her family, and the many dear friends she had.
Ginger Kock
March 24, 2005
Buffy & Kory, you are great friends and such a joy to work with -- my heart goes out to both of you for this loss. Just know that your mom is with you always, sitting on your shoulders and watching over you. My best to the rest of your family.
Bob Flax
March 24, 2005
Pam looked great when we saw her walking down Grove Avenue a few days before she passed. My wife and I commented on her radiant smile. She found her way to observe and enjoy life. She truly had a style of life. She will be missed.
marian hollowell
March 24, 2005
The first of spring
nipped you in the bud of life
all who know you
think too early
too shocked
to absorb
the reality of your passing
the first of spring
picked you to be its ever
blooming flower
all will remember-!
God bless your
continued journey
where ever you are
sitting on a fluffy cloud
sipping heavenly coffee
writing poems
painting masterpieces
ever blooming
i smile, seeing your smile, now
like the sweetness
in early spring.
Susan Hankla
March 24, 2005
I have many memories of Pam, because in the 80's she was in my home creative writing circle, The Wednesday Night Cenacle. In such a group, you get to know people as much through what they write as through conversations. (Of course what is said in a group is confidential.) But I enjoyed Pam's personality and I do feel I had priviledged access to her inner world. I enjoyed her visual art, when she was going through a prolific stage and I remember it had a Matisse quality to it that I admired.
I often ran into Pam in Carytown, Joe's, the N.Y. Deli through the years of being here with Jack Glover, my husband, and sometimes Pam would focus on me in such a way that it felt as if a sepcial light was on me. She could make you feel special.
Honestly, Jack and I both saw Pam walking through Joes' and it must have been after she died. She gave us a little wave and kept going.We will both miss her. She was such a part of our history.
Go Pam!
-with love to you children of hers,
Susan and Jack
Greg Winter
March 24, 2005
I was very sad to learn of Pam's untimely death. My thoughts and prayers go out to her family. Pam was truly the Fan's most beautiful, quintessential woman in both body and soul. Pam will be missed but always remembered.
Maggie Merlino
March 24, 2005
I have had the pleasure of working with Buffy and Kory for the past few years and one of my biggest regrets is that I never got to meet Pam. She was obviously a phenomenal woman who raised amazing children. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
robert
March 24, 2005
Came to Richmond knowing no one; left her knowing everyone :--))
You ask how? I’ll tell how! I simply met Pam.:---)) A sweet and beautiful human being. You touched our soul, You mended our wounds and you painted our truth
We all are going to miss you Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg.
Yours truly
Robert Hoshman
Brenda Whitfield
March 23, 2005
WOW...where do I begin? I've known Pam for over 20 years. She was the best neighbor anyone could have. Over the years, we would swap stories of our kids and whatever was going on in the neighborhood. Kory attended the same school as did my son and she would spend many afternoons at my home. She, like all of Pam's kids was a delight. Being a single mom is a difficult chore, but Pam handled it like a pro. When she moved last year, the neighborhood wasn't the same. I missed seeing her and having our little sidewalk chats. Pam was surely one of a kind. Everytime I pass her house, I look for her just out of habit. I did on occassion, see her in Carytown..and it was always such a pleasure. I feel as though a part of our neighborhood has been taken and will never be the same. I will miss her bright smile and humor. Buffy, Amy, Ethan, and Kory, please remember that your mom's memories are on my mind and in my heart. Take care.
Brenda
Meade Skelton
March 23, 2005
I am truly sorry for your loss. I had read the obituary in the Richmond-Times Dispatch and it instantly caught my eye. Although I had never met Mrs.Kirkland-Isenberg in person, she seemed like a fascinating individual. What a greatly written tribute to her.
God Bless,
Meade Skelton.
Kathleen Franck
March 23, 2005
For the past 30 years Pam and I have been “passing art acquaintances”, talking at art openings, friends houses, or other places in the Fan.
It has only been over the past 6 months that I have gotten to know her better, when I came back from teaching in Qatar to help care for my elderly parents. I often take my 92 year old Father out for lunch and we ran into Pam many times at Joe’s Inn. When confronted with a pretty woman my Father is an outrageous flirt.....but Pam gave it right back as she joked and laughed with him in a sweet and caring way. She certainly ‘made his day’ and warmed my heart with her kind, focused attention on my elderly Father. She always had time to tease him and make him feel special. We just visited with her about a week ago at Joe’s Inn and both Father and I will miss her playful comments and warm spirit. My prayers go out to her family, but I know Pam will be watching over all of you.
Ann Isenberg
March 23, 2005
Dear Buffy,Ethan,Amy,and Cory,
I didn't know your mom. My loss! I've heard a lot of interesting things about her though!!
One thing I do know . . . is that she raised some great kids.
Barry and I send our love and sympathy,
Aunt Ann
Margaret Woody
March 23, 2005
I met Pam at the Coffeeshop near Byrd Theater in Carytown, in 1997. I had just gotten divorced. Pam and I talked and she commented on how sad I appeared. We talked a lot, many places, in many galleries, in many poetry performances at what is now, Art 6 Gallery. We also loved thrift stores and would run into each other often at Fan Thrift. She went through some sadness during the late 90's and was having some difficulty. We were good listeners for each other.
We also ran into each other during much better times and we laughed a lot. She talked to me and always had that beautiful smile and we always exchanged hugs.
She always had an encouraging word and compliment. We liked each other's haircuts and taste in fashion. She congratulated me on my new husband, Jim, who I married in May 2003. She had just moved and she gave me her new address and card.
I am shocked to read about Pam in today's RTD-Obituary [March 23, 2005] because I feel like I just ran into Pam as recently as last month. I was with my mother eating at the Cafe during Sunday Brunch at VMFA. I had not seen her in almost a year. She looked marvelous. We talked at length to Etta Spain, a wonderful black woman guard. Pam and I were so interested in her life story. Pam and my mother-in-law, Lucy Woody, walked all over the museum that Sunday. We finally hugged and said we'd see each other soon. I invited her over my house and we decided we'd do that another time. I will miss seeing her. I am sorry such a delightful, creative, beautiful artist, mother and woman is no longer on Planet Earth.
Bye, Pam... You are loved, wherever you are and missed and will be thought of for a long, long time, fondly.
Zach Harwood
March 23, 2005
I am Pam's grandson and when I heard about the whole event of her death I was very sad but what made me feel very happy was the fact that everyone in richmond and beyond was supporting me and my family with what had happned. thank you for your entries we are all very happy for them and we have all been touched by your coments.
Clay Robertson
March 23, 2005
Pam was someone that I had seen around the Fan for years before I ever really met her. If you live in the Fan for any extended period of time there are tons of people you recognize from sight but never really meet. Pam would have none of that !! The night I met her we were two strangers sitting next to each other at the bar at Joe's Inn eating our respective dinners. Me, I'm shy. Pam, not. She struck up a conversation and before I knew it we had spent three hours talking about everything under the sun. I was fascinated to hear her history of the Fan life from the time she arrived here in the 60's. It was the last time we ever talked for such an extended period of time
but everytime we saw each other on the street we would always say hello and I was impressed by the fact that she never forgot my name.
It was always somehow comforting for me to see her around town, sipping coffee on the street or checking out the deals at the thrift shops. To me she will always represent the best of what I loved about living in the Fan. I wish I had gotten to know her better. My sympathies to her family, especially her children who I also remember as familiar, comforting Fan faces. Your mom was so cool......
Kathleen Markowitz
March 23, 2005
My deepest condolences to the family on the sudden loss of Pam.What kind memories I have of her. She will be greatly missed.
Andrew Boese
March 23, 2005
Hi Ethan, Buffy, Amy and Kory,
I expect that at least Buffy and Ethan remember me (and possibly Amy if Ethan and I bugged her enough). My mom called the other night and told me about Pam (Ethan's mom).
I am sorry for your loss. I have only good memories of your house on Hanover Ave., and your mom. We drove your mom crazy, but she always kept a sense of humor. I am more impressed by this now that I have my own kids - kids who have not done nearly the things that we did, yet still test my humor. Letting about 50 mice loose in the house one day comes to mind.
And yes my mom does have a painting of hers still on the wall in her house. A beautiful one.
God bless her. Ethan, I will look you up next time I come to Richmond.
Andrew
Kendal Blum
March 23, 2005
Buffy Harwood was my babysitter since before i can remember. When she went off to work i was at the age of 5. I still saw the Harwood family frequintly. Zack Harwood, has always, and still is my best friend. I remember when the Harwoods were living above Oma (Pam, i called her Oma) one day i went down to her part of the house with Zack. One thing i really remember about her house was that she had a huge basket full of toys that together Ethan and Zack had broken. I remember turning towards Zack amazed he could have broken quite so many toys, i also remember thinking he had a really nice grandmother, mending that huge pile of toys. As i got older i got to know Oma better. Igrew up with the Harwoods, and think of them as family, but i also grew up with Oma, she was another grandmother to me. Now that she is gone, i am very sad (so sad that I'm coming from California to go to the memorial service) but i know that we all will see her again, and that she is in a better place. Though we will all miss her, we will never forget her, and thats what matters, her memory, our memory of her, because a memory is something no one can get rid of.
Angela Miller Smith
March 23, 2005
Many moons ago when I was a waitress at Strawberry Street Cafe Pamela complimented me on my crazy colored knee socks.I had seen her many times in the Fan and at the time I actually lived on Stuart Avenue pretty close to where she lived.
During this time I had the oportunity to get to know her son Ethan very well.No mother could of asked for a sweeter,kinder son.
I offer my sincere thoughts of sympathy to the family.It will be so hard to come to terms with such a great loss.She really was the heart of the family.
I am very sorry and wish for all of the good memories of the past to be a comfort in getting you through such a tough time.
Regards,
Angela Miller Smith
Nick Kafantaris
March 23, 2005
I met Pam in the early 70's at The Village Cafe and later on she followed me to the upper Fan to Joe's Inn. She became one of the fixtures of the restaurant and also became my best friend. We shared a lot of concerns about our children over the years. One of the things that stuck in my mind was her concern of how to get Kory to George Mason. At the time Ethan had purchased a car and Pam was overly concerned that it wouldn't make the trip. So Pam and I packed Kory's belongings in my truck and took off to George Mason. It was hot day in late August and Kory's room was like on the fourth floor. We had to lug all of her stuff up to her room and then she and I headed back to Richmond. I feel lucky and happy to have had a last meal with Pam on Wednesday afternoon at Joe's. I will miss her terribly.
Mim Golub & Chuck Scalin
March 23, 2005
We first met Pam at a 4th of July picnic at the Carillon, waiting for the fireworks, probably 29 years ago this July. She's been a part of our acquaintance circle since then. It was always fun to run into her & have some philosophical discussion, whether at a thrift store or Ukrop's coffee counter or an art opening. We'll miss her. We'd love to be at the memorial but are unable to because of teaching at that time. Know that we are with all of you in our hearts, where Pam will live on. Peace.
Cathy Yohai
March 23, 2005
The summers of my childhood were spent at"the river" down the street from the Isenberg cottage.
Later I attended The Cathedral with my sister Betty Brown. I admired the growing Kirkland/Isenberg family.
Quite a few years later Pam and I became Carytown friends. We would stop and chat at Ukrops, outside the New York Deli, just about anywhere on Cary Street. We sometimes saw each other at an art gallery. I loved her and loved seeing her even though it was only occassionally. My heart is so sad that I cannot look forward to those spontanious meetings anymore.
I am so sorry for this great loss to your family. I am confident that Pam is now strolling the streets of heaven making many new friends. My very best love, Cathy Yohai-Ginter Park
bill harrison
March 23, 2005
When I looked at today's newspaper I could not believe the picture that caught my eye. Pam was one of those wonderful people, who if "you did not know them, you knew who they were." The conversations we have had at thrift stores....that's where I always saw Pam. What a welcoming loving way she had. She was so easy to be with. A true gift she was to all of us.
Bill Harrison
Mary Swezey
March 23, 2005
My memory is participating in a Sunday afternoon dinner at the Hanover Ave house in the early 80s when Buff and I were in high school. Pam oversaw chaos and harmony in the kitchen resulting in a fabulous chicken dinner with all the trimmings. I’m so sorry to hear such sad news. Pam will be missed by so many people.
H. W. "Bud" Minor
March 23, 2005
When I moved to the Fan at 1708 Hanover Avenue in 1990, the first person I met was this beautiful young lady by the name of Pam Iswnberg at the coffee shop in carytown. we immediately became friends that has lasted until this week, this day, this moment. She has been to many parties at my house, many coffee shop visits, many gatherings in the fan district, many museum visits, many movies together and etc.
I have admired this women's story about growing up, her family, and all her children. She has given up a lot for her children but without regrets, noteven once. I remember one time, she needed money, and she asked me to take her most loved painting that she would never sell and hold it for her until she paid me back. I thought I had bought her best painting. But No, she came back with the cash and I asked her to let me have the painting and she said it was not for sale at any price. Pam, I will miss the times that you said you love me and i you. We have remained friends and had dinner together until I heard the news of you passing on to a greater power and someday I will join you in the Up and Away coffee shop.
Buffy, Amy,Ethan, Kory and all the family, remember Pam always as a loving mother, friend and soul mate with that beautiful smile that would make everyone melt and feel important by her conversation with no fear of a stranger. That is how I will remember Pam Isenberg. Truth, honest, and never met a stranger.
Matt Whitfield
March 23, 2005
I have known Buffy, Amy, Ethan, and Kory for a little more than 20 years. To see the people they have become is a total reflection of the great mother that Pam was. Sometimes I wish that my own mother was as cool as Pam was. I guess that is probably why I always wanted to go over and hang out with Kory when I was a kid because I thought Kory, Ethan, Buffy, and Amy were so cool and that was a reflection of the person Pam was. I'll never forget her beautiful smile which could always brighten my day. I hope they have crossword puzzles in heaven because I know she will go crazy without one. Pam your coolness will be missed.
John Clarke
March 23, 2005
I met Pam Isenberg (that was how she introduced herself) briefly on February 28. I immediately liked her, sensing a gentleness of spirit and depth of wisdom that one rarely encounters. I remember thinking "God, send more people like this into my life. Amen."
In those few minutes, Pam made an indelible impression and inspired me to continue to hope for and look for the best in people. The ripples of her influence on many of us even from brief conversations will continue to spread.
Ann Knobbe
March 23, 2005
I haven't seen Pam in many years - how life passes. I remember her warmth, friendship, and most of all her honesty. She told you what she thought, how she felt, and many times we didn't want to hear it but she just put it out there. Be at peace, Pam. Know you were loved by your family and respected as an artist. Thank you for not being a cookie-cutter type person. You are missed.
Mike Rollison
March 23, 2005
To Buff, Eshan, Amy and Cory, my deepest regret to hear you lost your mom. Even after I left the Bakery( a million years ago) and avoided carytown for a while, I would still run into your mother, at walmart, at the thrift stores, and other free-to-attend events around town. She would update me on all of you, your children and spouses, and you certainly know how proud and happy she was with how you all turned out to be such solid, centered people, and you all have a mind of your own. This was in her face everytime she would speak to me about you.
I will remember her dancing at the Baker's Treat Prom with Garish, and the fast song from the 50's that lead to Gary dropping your mother on the floor.
I will miss your mother, you are all in my thoughts, and have been since I heard.
Josh Hildreth
March 23, 2005
Pam, my old neighbor and dear friend I will miss you dearly. You breezed into my life like cardinal landing in a winter garden. You helped me see beauty in the smallest of things and you had a gift for seeing the tiny associations that weave life together. I will miss our outings and adventures because to experience an art opening, play, or good meal with you reminded me of what it was like to be a child again- that feeling of just being able to lose yourself in the beauty and joy of the moment. I will be sad again when the windows of your lovely home at English Village will be bare of your happy clutter that reflected the unique lady you will forever be. But, I will forever remember and re-experience the joy of our friendship in the lovely picture you painted of Daisy, my dog, and I & the memories of happy times shared together. I send my heartfelt condolences to your children and family. May you forever rest in peace.
Patricia Gonet
March 23, 2005
I first met Pam when one of my sons was in Ethan's 4th grade class. They enjoyed being friends as much as Pam and I did. So many wonderful memories, and great art work that still graces my home. May all of you kids take comfort in knowing how special your mom was. Please continue to carry on her traditions of friendship, kindness, and eccentricity.
Steve Hicks
March 23, 2005
As Hanover Avenue neighbors we tremendously enjoyed getting to know Pam and her family and were sad when they all moved away. Buffy and her family were a fellow "Fox" family and we miss them. So sorry to hear about Pam. I know her passing was unexpected making it so much more difficult for her family but please know that she smiles on you still and will help you through this. Our thoughts are with all of you. Love, Steve, Vicki, Emily
Joy Payne
March 23, 2005
I am in total shock. I just cannot believe this. My husband Bill and I met Pam when Kory was just a tiny baby, and instantly became friends. When our own children came along, Pam was our model for parenting, based emblematically on this one terrific memory: we were babysitting one evening, and when it was Buff's turn to turn in, she put on her school uniform, smoothed it around her, and hopped into bed. We asked her why she was doing this and she said simply, "Saves time in the morning." We knew instinctively and with delight that this would be fine with Pam. I still laugh at this small incident, and over the years we watched her children grow into spectacular, free-spirited people. I simply cannot believe I will not run into Pam at the Clothes Rack or on Cary Street and receive her warm embrace and her keen interest in and compassion for our family. My beloved husband, Bill, who was Pam's dear friend, died in 2000. Pam and Bill INVENTED coffee and stimulating, witty conversation, and if there is one thing I can hold onto right now, it is knowing that Bill and Pam are brewing up something wonderful together and are eagerly awaiting tomorrow's festivities at the 2300 Club, where they can feast their gentle eyes on so many people who loved Pam (and Bill, too!). My dear, dear children--my heart aches for you. I am going now to look at the sketch Pam drew in our first son's baby book. I will always love you, Pam. You are a part of my life forever.
Robert Lett
March 22, 2005
Since i can't make it to the memorial I wanted to pass on my "Pam" story. I had seen her around all the fan places but never really talked to her. One day several years ago I was in the coffee shop on Cary Street (the one by Mongrel)having my coffee. Pam was standing outside just on the other side of the glass from where i was sitting. As I glanced up at Pam, suddenly a bird flew down and landed smack on the middle of her head and proceeded to just sit there for a minute or more. Pam noticed that I was watching the whole scene and gave me this big grin. She sort of just froze in place and giggled until the bird finally flew off. I went outside and we laughed about it and I commented on how wierd it was and she said "Oh things like that happen to me ALL the time". I know it's a kooky story but it's true, and everytime i would see her after that I would think about the bird,lol. She also came to my house once to see my lunchbox collection. Rest in peace Pam.
Olivia Glave
March 22, 2005
I've known Pam my whole life. If she were able I think she might say to her family and friends:
" I won't be far away, for life goes on,
So, if you need me call and I will come,
Though you can't see or hear me, I'll be near,
And if you listen with your heart, you'll hear,
All my love around you soft and clear."
She was a class act and I'll never forget her, ever.
Rest in Peace, Pam. Godbless.
Dave Draine
March 22, 2005
Buffy,Amy,Ethan,Kory, and the family..my thoughts and prayers are with you all.Take care of yourselves and each other.That's what family is all about.
Dave Draine
Land O'Lakes, Florida
813-235-9288
Diana Walsh
March 22, 2005
When I first walked into 2610 Hanover Ave. when Kory and I were in Middle School, I was amazed at the wonderful paintings that Pam created and miles of books that filled the walls and rooms. I felt so at home and welcome.
Pam always welcomed me into her home like I was one of the Isenberg clan. I always knew that I had a second home there. She was so kind to me and I will miss her very much. I will always remember the love that I felt in her home and among her family. She will be loved and missed by all. I know that she is very proud of you Kory and will always be watching over all of us.
Della Conti
March 22, 2005
I loved Pam. When I first met her, all her children were very young and she worked so hard almost all the time to support them. She was a wonderful person - so gentle, so creative, loving, and full of personalty. She had the most wonderful stories to tell. I especially remember her stories about her visit to the Chamberlayne Hotel in the Hampton Roads area. I have an oil painting that she did for me of an old Jamaican woman. I will always cherish it. What a wonderful artist. She was beautiful inside and out. I will miss her. My deepest sympathies go to her children.
Joe Nadreau
March 22, 2005
While I did not know Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg personally, I have had the distinct pleasure of working with two of her daughters, Kory and Buffy. By knowing the two of them, I know that the world will miss their mother. My thoughts and prayers are with her family and friends.
Phil Nunnally
March 22, 2005
Though I missed the opportunity to meet Pamela, I've been friends with and worked with her daughters Buff and Kory over the years. When you see them around town, they seem to always be running into dear old friends on the sidewalk, enjoying and reveling in their news. I'm sure Pamela passed down her graceful, excited manner to her children. My prayers are with her family.
Tina Johnson
March 22, 2005
Buff & Kory,
My prayers are with you and your family. May God strengthen you all and give you the courage to celebrate your mother's life.
And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:7
Brenda Walsh Arevalo
March 22, 2005
Your mom had the most beautiful smile. And whenever I was near her, I remember having a feeling of safety and serenity, a sort of calmness that made the rest of the world seem too fast, too extreme and not friendly enough. I will always remember her as an extraordinary woman. If I can ever be of help to you in any way, please let me know.
Brenda (Diana's Mom)
Kent Headley
March 22, 2005
Damn. Immediate memories of my indoctrination into the extended family that made Baker's Treat(?) one of it's gathering spots some twenty years ago. Although I hadn't seen Pam in a long time, she was one of those that you derive a comfort from just knowing she was out there somewhere, and a chance meeting in some Fan establishment was always possible and welcome. My thoughts go out to Buffy, Ethan, Amy and Kory.
Kathleen Moses
March 22, 2005
I did not know Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg personally. I have the privilege of working with her daughter Buffy. It saddens me to know that she is suffering the loss of her mother. My thoughts and prayers are with each of you during this time of bereavement.
Tay Kemp
March 22, 2005
Pam was a neighbor and a very close friend. I will miss her sensativity, her insight, laughing together on our walks and over coffee at Jean-Jacque...she was a big sister that I never had! Her beautiful smile, soft voice, and child-like eyes are forever in my heart. Her Matisse-Chagall-esque paintings show the gentle spirit that she is. I miss her terribly, but now she is drinking coffee with the Matisse and Chagall! To her 4 children, you all were always first in her life above all.
Emily Righter
March 22, 2005
Pam will be missed. The loss of Pam has been terribly shocking and tragic to all of us. I always thought Pam would out-live all of us and look fabulous while doing it. Pam defiantly had the “it” factor. The things she could do with a simple scarf were a pure art form. Pam oozed style, grace and enough eccentricity to make it all fun. Pam embraced each human as an individual. I was not just her son’s fiancé; I was a woman with my own story. I am going to miss our coffee talks in her beautiful home. She could cover love, misery, social constraints, art and the “truth” in about two cups of coffee. She could even make death a casual topic. Pam was a true artist in every aspect of her life.
We would always get little surprise cards in the mail from her. She made the most beautiful cards and they were filled with words of love. We like to call her “Sweet Muddha.”
We would like to thank all of the support from Pam’s many friends; it means so much to us. I would like to post this poem that Pam had framed on her wall.
To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It looks like Pam succeeded. Pam, Mom and Oma we all miss you so much. We love you.
Lori Raybould
March 22, 2005
I never met Pamela. But I know Ethan through my good friend Emily (his fiance), and I must say what a wonderful son she raised. I know she will be deeply missed and always in their hearts.
Matthew Dalton
March 22, 2005
I only met Pam a few times, through her daughters Buff and Kory, but she was a very memorable woman. She was extremely nice, very personable and had a great sense of humor, all characteristics that she passed on to her children. After the first time I met her I remember being left with an impression of having just met someone who was wonderfully unique and believed in living life to the fullest. I also remember thinking that Buff and Kory had a cool mom. Even though I do not have vast memories to recount, I feel honored to been around her the few times that I was.
My thoughts and prayers are with all of the Kirkland-Isenberg family.
Linny Greer
March 22, 2005
Lost, an artist, a seer and a dear, dear friend.
Christopher Small
March 22, 2005
Im so sorry to learn about Pam. The last time is saw her she was so happy and was enjoying life right now so much. She was a wonderful person and a great friend. All of our lives are richer for having known her. She will truly be missed.
Edward Weston
March 22, 2005
I first met Pam in the early 90's through my partner, Byron Knight. Afterwards, I would see her regularly, if not in Carytown, then when she came to the AAA office I worked in to pay her car insurance bills. Pam was always a bright spot in the day. The world has lost a good friend.
Ken Hopson
March 22, 2005
When I first blew into town, I would nurse my hangovers at the local coffeeshop where Pam was a regular. Like a clever psychologist, Pam would always navigate our conversations around me and my woes. Without offering advice, she would ask the right questions so that I would end up giving myself the guidance I didn't even know I needed. At first I thought, who is this whacky lady bestowing me this motherly wisdom, but days turned into weeks and weeks into months and months into years, and Pam was always there to lend an ear and encouragement. As I got to know her better I found myself adopting some of her techniques; in parenting, in thrifting, in aestheitcs and even basic social skills. Her wonderful family is a testemonial to her nurturing character. I am grateful for all the special considerations Pam shared with me over the years and will carry them with me always.
Laura Daniels
March 22, 2005
I did not know Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg personally. I have the privilege of working with her daughter Kory. Working with Kory is such a delight in my daily work life; it pains me to know that she is suffering the loss of such a dynamic mother. My hope is that she will find peace in the next few years. To Kory and the rest of the family: Take comfort that her spirit will guide, advise and watch over you. As long as you live, she too will live, for she is a part of you, as you remember her.
Jimmy Blackford
March 22, 2005
I extend my heartfelt condolences to the family and loved ones of Pamela Kirkland-Isenberg.
Love,
Jimmy Blackford
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