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Dawn Szappanos Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for Dawn Szappanos
Robert Szappanos
March 9, 2009
I would like to thank all of you that have posted on this guestbook....It really have meant a lot to me knowing all of the people out there that loved her so much. Even though this guestbook is nearing an end....not a second will go by that I don't think of my wife...Dawn...Every day around the house I find things that show me how much she was loved by people and by how much she loved and cared about everyone. How much she loved God and the Church...Seventh Day Adventist in Middletown. You would think that over a years time things would get a little better...but it will take much more time for that.
I want to thank you...Dawn... for the first date we had in 1978 and allowing me to become your Husband in 1980 and a special daughter...Amanda. I think of you everyday and whatever I am doing. I think of all the good times we had and some of the bad times we were able to get through together. I went for a drive over the weekend and on the radio the song played...I Can Only Imagine...the song that was played at the Memorial Service. I had to pull over as my eyes quickly filled with tears of saddness. You will be in my heart forever and hope someday I will be next to you....I love and miss you very much... Sunshine......
Amanda Gray
March 5, 2009
Mom,
Just wanted to let you know that me and Aaron finished most of the baby room. We got the crib, stroller/carseat, and all the baby clothes put up....I have some of the baby blankets that you made to use for her. I am sure that she is going to like them. Also I took that pink Scrapbook and the stuff that went with it that you were going to use to make my new baby book. I am just going to use that to make Addison's. A lot of people think that I feel alone through all this and I am scared, but that is one thing that I am not. I have you and God by my side to help me everystep of the way. I have Aaron to physically yell at, so I think I will be ok :) Aaron's parents are very thrilled to meet Addison, just like I know you would be if you were here. I guess dad is happy. I can't really tell. I don't know what to do in that situation anymore. Just know I am always thinking about you and will always love you....you were and will always be "my best friend".....
Robert Szappanos
March 5, 2009
I came across this letter form our daughter Amanda. I would like to share it with all of you. It is a little long. It was written when amanda was in High School and is titled...My Mother, My Best friend
Over the recent years as I go on living my life I realized that there is no one in the world that I love having as my best friend more then this; that person being my mother.
It all started when I was a little kid, old enough to recall the countless number of incidents that me and my mother haved shared. One the the incidents being my first day of Kindergaten and my mother walking me to the bus stop,holding my hand as if she were letting something that she really cared about drift off into the wind. I remember getting on the bus and looking out the window and wondering why I seen tears petrude from her eyes. I remember the first time I came home crying and my mom grasping me into her warm and welcoming arms and continuously asking me what was wrong as if I were dying. She was the one that was there for me, when i felt that I had no one, who would sit there and let me talk to her until she knew and was satisfied to the fact that I was OK and everything was going to be all right.
Another time, the one that is to remain unforgettable until I pass on would be the time that I got my first "C" on my report card and me being the brain that I was back in grade school having to bring it home and dreadfully having to show my mother. I walked into the door and sat down and showed her the grade waiting for long, hourless talk I was about to receive. I remember her looking at it and then looking back over my way and telling me that "Everyone makes mistakesand you will just have to try a little harder next time. No ther mother in the world could have been more sympathetic and understanding as mine from which I was a student who brought home straight A's
There are expandable and endless number of events that I could share with you on how my mother is simply the mom and the best friend that everyone should have and receive in life but I would not have enough paper, time, or ink to share it with you. My mother to me, is simply the greatest and one of the most inspirational people to me right now in my life and will always be. She teaches me to grow, to live life to the fullest and to express myself in a way that others will be acceptable on getting to know me. No feeling in this world is greater than knowing that you have such as amazing best friend, one who you not only live with but you can share everthing that you do in life to become the person you are trying to strive for.
My mother is not only my flesh and blood but she is my lifelong partner through thick and thin. She is that one and only best friend that I will have to dwell on in my later years. I wish everyone could experience the things I do with my mother and even though I might not show it, I love my mother more than anything and would not trade her for any other person or mother in the world. She is simply that one and only. that is why my mother is my best froend. The end.
Well Honey that is our little girl. Now a young lady married and about to have he first child...a daughter. I know one thing honey...If she shows the love you showed Amanda.....She is going to have a very special daughter just like we have Dawn. I wanted to share this from amanda to all of you.
SAMMY Bunnell
March 4, 2009
To my dearest family, some things I'd like to say...
but first of all, to let you know, that I arrived okay.
I'm writing this from heaven. Here I dwell with God above.
Here, there's no more tears of sadness; here is just eternal love.
Please do not be unhappy just because I'm out of sight.
Remember that I'm with you every morning, noon and night.
That day I had to leave you when my life on earth was through,
God picked me up and hugged me and He said, "I welcome you."
It's good to have you back again; you were missed while you were gone.
As for your dearest family, they'll be here later on.
I need you here badly; you're part of my plan.
There's so much that we have to do, to help our mortal man.
God gave me a list of things, that he wished for me to do.
And foremost on the list, was to watch and care for you.
And when you lie in bed at night, the day's chores put to flight.
God and I are closest to you....in the middle of the night.
When you think of my life on earth, and all those loving years
because you are only human, they are bound to bring you tears.
But do not be afraid to cry; it does relieve the pain.
Remember there would be no flowers, unless there was some rain.
I wish that I could tell you all that God has planned.
But if I were to tell you, you wouldn't understand.
But one thing is for certain, though my life on earth is o'er.
I'm closer to you now, than I ever was before.
There are many rocky roads ahead of you and many hills to climb;
but together we can do it by taking one day at a time.
It was always my philosophy and I'd like it for you too...
that as you give unto the world, the world will give to you.
If you can help somebody who's in sorrow and pain,
then you can say to God at night......"My day was not in vain."
And now I am contented....that my life has been worthwhile,
knowing as I passed along the way, I made somebody smile.
So if you meet somebody who is sad and feeling low,
just lend a hand to pick him up, as on your way you go.
When you're walking down the street, and you've got me on your mind;
I'm walking in your footsteps only half a step behind.
And when it's time for you to go.... from that body to be free,
remember you're not going.....you're coming here to me.
Elizabeth Clark
March 4, 2009
My Darling Daughter,
I just want to tell you I love and miss you very much. Time is running out for everyone to write to you to tell you how much you mean to all of us. But I just want you to know I carry you in my heart where ever I am always. I know you are watching all of us from Heaven and smiling down on us. There are days that are difficult to get through because I miss you so much, but God helps me get through them somehow. I know I will see you again in Heaven some day. And until then I have to try to be strong and carry on in my life because I know that is what you would want all of us to do as difficult as it may be sometimes. I pray that you are happy and well with our Blessed Saviour. And I know He is taking good care of you for all of us. Remember always you are always in my thoughts and prayers. I will see you some day and we will be together forever.
I love you my baby girl Molly, Always remember that, Mommy XOOXOXOXOXXOXOXOXOXO
Amanda Gray
March 3, 2009
Mom,
I dont even know where to begin. Your Guestbook is almost up so I wont be able to write to you anymore. In 9 weeks or less I will be a mom and I am so scared and nervous. I wish you were here with me cause I could really use your help. My baby shower went well, but there was one person that was missing. Even though it snowed, and I knew that meant you were there it just wasent the same. This was never how I pictured it would happen. But its like they say, you take the cards that you were dealt and deal with them. By no means am I saying that everything is ok, cause its not but its gets easier as the days go by. I think about you all the time and that will never change. Please be with me through the next couple of months. I could really use your help. And even though you wont be there is person, soon enough you will see you "Little Bambino" from Heaven. Tell God I said hi. I love you with all my heart!!!! That will never change
Robert Szappanos
March 3, 2009
Honey I miss you so much....If I could have just one wish...I would wish that I would have one more day with you. I would hold you in my arms every second of the day and keep telling you that I love you very much. I know what that wish would do Honey...It would leave me wishing just one more day with you. I look at your pictures every day Even though I visit you a lot at the cemetery I feel that you are with me where ever I go. When I go for rides you are sitting right next to me...enjoying yourself and knitting up a storm....In a few month I will be a GrandPa. I know if you were here you would be making all kind of things for our daughter Amanada. Honey things are still the same at home...everthing is where you left it...so Honey come on home....Bambi want to sit in your lap and prrrr and want's to be petted and Missy would be at you feet waiting for you to give her something to eat. Dearest Dawn I love you very much and will love you forever and beyond.....Please stay close
Marie Biddle
March 3, 2009
In my heart I know your watching over your loved ones. May you Rest in Peace with our Father in heaven!
All My Love, Aunt Peanut xo
SAMMY BUNNELL
March 3, 2009
Dearest Dawn,
Oh my .. I just don't know what to say. I cannot write to you anymore.
Teri, Mary and myself were at Amanda's baby shower. She looks beautiful. BUT you are already know that ..you were there with all of us.
She is so nervous about this birth. I don't think it is the actual birth but the fact she feels as if she is alone. The girls and I cannot take your place but we love her as if she were our own. We had to introduce ourselves at the party when they drew our name and how we were related. I could not even speak when they drew my name and you know that is rare for me. You are an important part of my life and I know you are with all of us. I will see you one day and we shall walk the streets of gold. Keep that smile and keep watching over us. I love you so very much.. Your bff always
Elizabeth Clark
March 2, 2009
My darling daughter,
I guess this will be the last time I can write to you. So,I just want to tell you how much I love and miss you. I will always carry you in my heart and will try to remember the fun times we had together, especially making a quilt at my house. It sure was a lot of fun. I will also remember our chats on the phone and how much you loved me. I know you will always stay close to me because I always feel your presence around me wherever I am. Please stay close to Amanda and Bob. They need to know you are with them also. You left behind all the love you had for everyone and I think that is what keeps all of us going in our lives. You are an angel and I know God is taking care of you. Remember always that I love you with all my heart and someday we will be together forever. God just took you away from all of us for a little while until we can be reunited again. Stay warm and be happy in Heaven. Kiss and Hug Robin and everyone for me. You are both in my prayers every night before I go to sleep. I have to say good-bye now sweetie pie, so take care of yourself and always remember I love you and your sister very much.
All my love forever, Mommy OXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXO
Elizabeth Davis
February 22, 2009
Soapy, so you are going to be a grandpa! I am sure that Dawn is so happy, too! Life has not been kind to you this year, but a baby, a little girl grand daughter- that is such hope and love! I hope that all goes well for you and for Amanda, her hubby and the little Soapy!!! love, Liz Somody-Davis
Robert Szappanos
February 14, 2009
You were my Valentine back in 1978 you are my Valentine today and you will be my Valentine till we meet again and I can hold you once again....Happy Valentine's Day Dawn...I love you and miss you very much....
Elizabeth Clark
February 7, 2009
Hi my baby girl,
It's been a year since God took you to Heaven and it seems like yesterday. This letter is so hard to write to you because on my birthday all I did was cry. All I thought about was you not being here to wish me a Happy Birthday like you always did. I miss hearing your voice on the telephone. And then at 11:25 PM on Feb. 6th I remember holding your hand when you took your last breathe and the tears just flowed down my cheeks. The pain is still in my heart just like it was that night. I love and miss you so much. My heart aches all the time for you. I don't think it will ever go away. I can't come and visit because you are so far away. I look at your picture every morning and smile at you. I hope you can see me. There isn't one day that doesn't go by that I don't think of you. I have a new kitten and I named her Molly. Remember how I called you that on the phone? Molly is so cute. I know you would like her. I've tried calling Bob but I don't think he can talk to anyone yet. I hope he is ok. I know you are watching over Bob and Amanda and the rest of your family. We all love and miss you so very much. I know you'll be with Mandy when she has Addison. She will be as beautiful as Mandy was when she was born. I know you will be so proud of her. Your brother told me to say hi to you. He talks about you often. Well my darling daughter I just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you today. I love and miss you so very much. I'll come visit you when we can get to Kentucky and I'll bring you flowers. Take care of yourself and say hi to your sister for me. I love you both with all my heart.
All my love, Mommy xooxoxoxoxoxox
Robert Szappanos
February 5, 2009
DEAR
DAWN..I MISS YOU SO MUCH. MY NIGHTS ARE SO LONELY AND MY DAYS ARE SO
SAD. I FIGHT BACK TEARS BUT END UP LOOSING THE BATTLE. IT IS HARD FOR
ME RIGHT NOW TO UNDERSTAND WHY GOD TOOK YOU AWAY FROM ME. MAYBE SOME
DAY I WILL UNDERSTAND THAT BUT RIGHT NOW I DO NOT. YOU LOVED GOD SO
MUCH AND LOVED YOUR CHUCH AND THE KIDS THAT YOU TEACHED EVERY WEEK AND
GOD. IT SEEMED AS IF YOU WERE DOING A GOOD JOB FOR HIM HERE ON EARTH.
EVERYWHERE I TURN IN THE HOUSE REMINDS ME OF YOU. WHEN I GO FOR A SHORT
DRIVE I THINK OF YOU SITTING NEXT TO ME. EVERYONE HAS TOLD ME OF THIS
PROCESS THAT I AM GOING THROUGH AND WHAT IS STILL AHEAD...BUT IT IS SO
HARD RIGHT NOW...I COME TO SEE YOU JUST ABOUT EVERY DAY AND LONG FOR
THE DAY WHEN I WILL BE NEXT TO YOU....HOW I WISH I COULD JUST HOLD YOU
IN MY ARMS JUST ONE MORE TIME. I JUST WANT TO LET YOU KNOW THAT I LOVE
YOU VERY MUCH AND WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU...DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST
MEET YOU THE NICKNAME I GAVE YOU....SUNSHINE....WELL AS I AM WRITING
THIS NOTE THE SUN IS OUT AND THE SKY IS BLUE....I THINK THAT YOU ARE
TELLING ME THAT I AM NEAR AND ALWAYS WILL BE. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND
MISS YOU. PLEASE STAY NEAR TO ME....
ROBERT SZAPPANOS (LOUISVILLE, KY)
Contact me
I wrote this about one year ago and my feelings are still the same. I miss you so much and wish that one day you would walk into the house like nothing ever happened and I would wake up from this very bad dream. There is a song called "one more day" and it is about having there loved one with them for just one more day...that is my only wish. I would just want to hold you and tell you that I love you so very much....just one more time. I have a small peice of paper in my wallet that has the word "Sunshine" and C3 after it. That was the name I would call you back in 1979 when we were both stationed at Shaw AFB ,SC and the C3 was your room number....I still have it in my wallet next to your picture. Pastor Erick sent me a very nice card today and he said that He along with the entire church miss you very much. I will come by on saturday and bring you some flowers and sit on the bench with you. I love you so much Dawn... You are so very much missed by me and Amanda and your Mom and Dad and brother Buddy.
Amanda Gray
January 8, 2009
Hey Mom,
Just wanted to write on here and say "Hello" since its been since New Years since the last post. I had a really bad dream last night and have been thinking about you all morning. I miss you a lot and I really wish you were here so you could be with me through this pregnancy. Nana is gonna come stay with me for a month to help me through all this so I am grateful for that. I just wish you were here. Just not the same. I am also having my baby shower on the 21st of February so hopefully that is fun. I just miss you a lot and I hope that all this get easier!!!! Hope Heaven is as wonderful as you are!!! I love you!
Elizabeth Clark
January 1, 2009
Happy New Year My Darling Daughter,
It doesn't seem happy since you went away. The Holidays were tough to get through for all of us. I dreamt of you and Robin the other night all three of us were running through a beautiful garden of flowers and you looked so happy. I'm sure it's beautiful in Heaven. I just want you to know I love and miss you so very much. Yesterday was you and Bobs Wedding Anniversary. I tried to call him but I had a feeling he was visiting you . I hope you had a nice visit with him because he misses you so very much also. He is so lost without you. Please stay close to him and Mandy because they really need you near them now sweetheart. Let them know you are with them always. I just want to tell you I think of you all the time. I know you're around me and I feel your presence all the time no matter where I go. I have your picture in my car and I talk to you while I drive. I will keep you with me always. Well honey, I better go now. Happy New Year to you and Robin. Give each other a big hug and kiss for me.I promise I will write to you soon.
I love you with all my heart,
Mommy xooxoxoxoxooxxo
Amanda Gray
January 1, 2009
Happy New Year Mommy! I miss you and Love you
Robert Szappanos
December 31, 2008
Well Honey you know what day it is today....About this time back in 1980 on the steps of the county courthouse in Sumter SC you gave me the honor
to become your husband. It was the happiest day in my life. You were so pretty that day...actually everyday. Sure we had our ups and downs but we got through it all. We had/have a wonderfull daughter who will make us grand parents next spring. I miss you so much...this of all days. I
look at the picture poster that Amanda and Robin put together with some of the wedding pictures. I was one lucky man. I just wish that I could tell that to your face today. But I have two lovely pictures of you on
the dinning room table that I look at and talk to you every day. Gosh you were so pretty. I wish you would come home. You have a lot of knitting stuff to finish and more to start for our Grand Daughter this spring. I placed a card today by your picture for you...See I did not
forget.....I know that Thursday will be a new year....But I wish that I could turn this year back to the begining....I still had you to hug and hold. I still have the ring on my finger that you put on it this day in 1980. I still dont understand why all of this happened like it did. I am still trying to find an answer. Well Honey...Happy Anniversary Dawn.
I love you so much and miss you. Please stay near me and let me know that you are around. I love you Honey....
Amanda Gray
December 31, 2008
Mom,
I dont really know how to say or write this but I wanted to wish you and dad a Happy Anniversary. I know that he is really sad and lonely without you and today is a really hard day for him. Just be there with him since I can't and give him some kind of joy or happiness. I miss you and love you very much
Elizabeth Clark
December 28, 2008
My darling daughter,
I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas but I cried so hard all day for you and your sister. My heart was hurting so bad that day. So I'll wish you a Merry Christmas late. Every day seems to be a challenge for me to get through. Nothing is the same anymore since you and your sister left me. I hope you and her know I think of you all the time and I love and miss you both so very much. I put up a xmas tree for you and Robin. Your pictures were next to it and Christmas morning I kissed you both and wished you a Merry Christmas and cried because you weren't here. I know God is taking care of you both and you are watching over all of us. Please give each other a big hug and kiss from me, daddy and your brother. He misses you terribly bad. He talks about you often. Well sweetie baby, I'm gonna go for now. I will write to you again soon. Remember always I love you both with all my heart and I will always miss you.
All my love, Mommy XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Amanda Gray
December 25, 2008
Mom,
It breaks my heart that I have to tell you Merry Christmas over a message wrote to your guest book. I miss you so much. The one wish I had this Christmas will never come true, only because it cant. I wish I could be there to visit with you today but im here in FL. I hope you have a Merry Christmas!!! Tell my aunt I said hi
Robert Szappanos
December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas Dawn. I will come by after work to visit with you. It will be nice and sunny today. I hope you like the flowers I got for you. I miss you so much...If I could only hold you one more time...kiss you and tell you that I love you . That is all I wish for....
Elizabeth Clark
December 23, 2008
My darling daughter,
I just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you today and your sister. I think this is the hardest thing that I have ever had to go through in my life, and that is, loosing both my baby girls. It hurts so bad because I feel half of my life was taken away from me. I miss you and your sister so very much and my heart is so empty. It's hard for me getting through each day without tears rolling down my face. I have you and your sister's picture on my entertainment center and I look at yous all the time. Oh how I wish I could hold yous in my arms just one more time. When God took you both away from me He also took part of my heart. The Holidays aren't going to be the same anymore for me and daddy. Your brother misses you too. He talks about you and Robin all the time. I have a lot of wonderful memories and things you have given to me through the years that sometimes make me smile. I'm so happy I'm going to be a great grandma. And the baby is a little girl. I promise you I will give her lots of hugs and kisses from you. I can hardly wait to meet her. I'm going to stay with Amanda and Aaron for a few weeks when she has the baby. I can hardly wait to see them. I miss Amanda so much. You would be so proud of Amanda. She is going to be a wonderful mother like you were to her. She has become the daughter you wanted her to be and I know you're watching over her and her new family she has made. I haven't talked to Bob lately. It's just so hard to talk to anybody now. Your sister just went to Heaven a few weeks ago to be with you and I'm still angry at God for taking her away from me the same year He took you. It just isn't fair because I'm still missing you so very bad and now I don't have either one of my girls. I don't know how to take the hurt away from my heart. I know how Bob feels because every day is a challenge to get through and it isn't easy. Mary calls me once in a while and I'm so happy to talk to her. She always makes me feel good because I know she loves me and daddy very much. Mary,Teri, Katie and Allen came for Robin's funeral and it made me and daddy happy. They are always there for us when we need them. You have so may wonderful friends who loved you and now we are part of their family. As soon as the weather gets warmer we are coming to visit you. I need to come and talk to you and bring you pretty flowers. How I wish God wouldn't have taken you and Robin from me. I hope you and Robin are happy in Heaven. Now you are together forever and someday I will be with yous. Always remember I love you and your sister. Give each other a hug and kiss for me. Sleep well my little angels and remember always that I love and miss you.
All my Love, XOOXOXOXOXOXO
Mommy
Robert Szappanos
December 21, 2008
GOD SAW YOU GETTING TIRED AND A CURE WAS NOT TO BE. SO HE PUT HIS ARM AROUND YOU AND WHISPERED, "COME TO ME". WITH TEARFUL EYES WE WATCHED YOU PASS AWAY, AND ALTHOUGH WE LOVED YOU DEARLY, WE COULD NOT MAKE YOU STAY. A GOLDEN HEART STOPPED BEATING, HARD WORKING HANDS AT REST, GOD BROKE OUR HEARTS TO PROVE TO US, HE ONLY TAKES THE BEST. I LOVE AND MISS YOU SO MUCH DAWN.....
Robert Szappanos
December 18, 2008
I wish I could say that this will be a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year...but I would be lieing to you. As with the many "Firsts" I have had to go through now comes one of the hardest periods for me...The Holidays and the day we got married. Dec 31,1980. I would like to thank all of you that post on this site and to those that have read this site. Everday I find more and more things around the house of how much Dawn was loved by people around her and how much she LOVED GOD. I believe now more than ever that she was not affraid of dieing and was looking forward to heaven. I think back this time last year and even though she was weak I was able to hug and hold her and tell her that I love her. I cherish the days I had with her and the last 8 months that I was able to take care of her from day one to the end being at her side along with the rest of the family. It is very hard hearing Christmas music and going out to a store seeing all of the hussle and bussle of people shopping for the holidays and noticing couples have a good time around me. I have many memories of Dawn at home that I know from being told...will give me joy and happiness down the road...but right now they just bring tears and bitterness. Again thanks to all of you that have posted over the past 11 months.
Sammy Bunnell
December 13, 2008
Dearest Dawn,
I wanted to let you know Amanda is doing such a good job taking care of herself and her daughter before she even gets here. I know you are right beside her all the way. Your friends are going to be there as much as she lets us to help take care of her. I love you and miss you more than anyone knows.
Dawn,39 years old, Robin 38 years old
Elizabeth Clark
December 10, 2008
My Darling Daughter,
I've wanted to write to you sooner but I was busy taking care of your sister who was so sick. I think about you all the time and love and miss you so much. I do a lot of crying now because now I've lost my other baby girl. Please take care of one another and know that I loved you both so very much and there are no words to tell you both just how empty my life is without you and Robin. I am always in tears and the hurt just won't go away. I just don't understand why God took you both away from me in 9 1/2 months apart. It just isn't fair. My heart is broken in a million pieces and I don't think it will ever mend. I feel so lost without you and Robin. Nobody knows the way a mothers heart hurts unless you loose your babies. Every time I go to visit Robin I'm going to flowers from you on her grave from you. She loved and missed you so much and now you are at peace together forever. I can't write anymore honey because I'm crying too hard. I promise I will write to you again soon. Give Robin a hug and kiss from me and tell her to do the same. I love and miss you both.
All my love, Mommy xooxoxoxoxoxo
Amanda Gray
December 1, 2008
Hey Mom,
I just wanted to get on here and tell you that we are having a baby girl....Her name is going to be Addison Taylor. I cant wait to meet here....I feel like history is repeating itself, considering that you were 24 when you got pregnant with me and you had a girl...Im so excited..I wish you were here to knit baby clothes and go crazy spoiling her....Well I know you are with me somehow. I miss you, Thanksgiving just wasent the same without you. I hope dad is excited. Maybe Addison will bring the same joy in his life that I brought to yours. I love you mom
Robert Szappanos
November 27, 2008
Dear Dawn....Well I guess that you are taking care of your little sister..Robin..now. You are both in a better place with no pain. But Honey please let Robin know that I took good care of you and did everthing I could for you. It is so hard without you. The days are not any easier. This must be hell on earth that I am going through because I cannot believe that it could be worse. I miss you so much and i pray that some day I will be with you again.....Love your husband Bob
Sammy Bunnell
November 24, 2008
Dearest Dawn,
Today is a sad day for Ma and Pa Clark..
She lost another angel in her life. Robin..
I, like everyone you touched...misses you.. I hope you and Robin are having a good time in Heaven together. I am trying to keep an eye on Amanda.. I know I am not doing a good job.. I know she misses you so much and could really use her Mom right now. Us girls can't take your place.. but we are certainly trying to be there if she needs us... With the holidays coming up.,..it is really hard on Bob and Amanda and Mom and Dad..
I know Teri, Mary and Myself miss you so much.. Especially at the ol'
Walmart on Blitz day .. watching the crazy shoppers bolt their way through the door. Remember the one that ran over your toe trying to get the pajamas... You screamed out.... and then we laughed so hard..
I miss you my friend..
I love you..
Amanda Gray
November 11, 2008
Hey Mom,
Just wanted to say hi and tell you that I miss you and I Love you..Ive been thinking a lot about you lately and I really wish I had you right now....I know your with me everyday but I wish you were physically with me right now....I love you!!!!
robert szappanos
November 10, 2008
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2UWx-shGM0g
robert szappanos
November 8, 2008
How I wish this song would come true http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2UWx-shGM0g
Robert Szappanos
October 26, 2008
A gentle wind blew across the land
Reaching out to take a hand
For on the winds, the angels came
Calling out my wife...Dawns name
Left behind, our collective tears
Loving memories of the years
Of joy and love, a life we spent
And now Heaven, she is sent
On angel's wings, a heavenly flight
Her journey home, towards the light
To those who weep, a life is gone
But in God's love, 'tis but the Dawn
She is the thousand winds that blow
and diamond glints upon the snow
She is the sunlight on ripened grain
She is the gentle autum rain
When you awaken in mornings hush
She is that swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight
She is the soft star that shines at night
May its blessings of love be upon her
May the peace abide within her
May its essence illuminate her hearts and ours
Now and forever more
I love you Dawn...God bless and keep you
Your loving husband,
Bob
Robert Szappanos
October 7, 2008
Honey I miss you so much. This has been a bad day for me...crying most of it. I tried going through some of you papers in the middle room and all that I found are notes about how much you loved Me and Amanda along with your family back home. I one notebook you wrote all we dod in 2004 when we went to visit the Soo Lockes. There are noted from the kids you taught at Sabbath school and how much they loved you. Just as I start to go through stuff i come across this and cannot toss anything out. I even picked up an issue of the Seventh Day newsletter. It was dated july 2007. I opened it up and the article that was in front of me was about Pastor Erick and his wife Harmony. Honey i think in so many ways you are talking to me. I think you left all of this behind for me to see for a reason. God I miss you so much and I miss our daughter who has moved. I just wish that God would have healed you and keep you near to me. I just donr know when this will end. I love you and miss you so much. I look at you pictures every day. Evernight I play the teddy bear that you have that says now I lay me down to sleep...for you dear and another cabbage patch doll that when you hug it it plays a lulaby...I play it every night for you dear Dawn. With tears flowing I just say to you that I love you and miss you very much. Please stay close to me....Please....
Robert Szappanos
September 5, 2008
Well Honey I just got back from Amanda's wedding. She sure looked pretty. Just like you did when we got married in 1980. I though that day that I was
the luckiest man in the world and I am sure that Aron feels the same way about Amanda. I wish that you would have been there standing next to me...but I know that in some way you were and gave Amanda a big hug and kiss. I gave her the heart that I got for you that says" I Love
You" and the other heart that says Dawn...Remember I got that for you a few days after your name was changed back to awn. I know that you loved them both and Amanda will love them also and take good care of them.
Every day as I go through papers it continues to show me how much you loved Me .....Amanda...Your Mom and Dad...Brother and Sister...Mary...Terri and Sammy and above all how much you loved GOD.
You saved everything...I find so many things of places we went and had fun. You have no idea how much that means to me right now. It reminds me of all the places we went to and all of the fun we had. No body can
say we just stayed at home. That is what I am going to miss is the
trips and fun we had. When I go for a ride at times I will reach across and pat your seat...I know that you are with me. Well Honey this is Amanda's day and I know that you will watch over both of them. I cried like a baby...but I am loosing my babygirl...But she has grown up to be a very pretty woman. I think that we both did a good job. I sure miss you...I wish that you we here with me....I can only imagine......I love you very very much and I love my daughter very very much as I know you do to...
Sammy Bunnell
August 28, 2008
Dearest Dawn,
I know you are so excited about being a Grandma.. Lets not call you Grandma.. How about something exciting. We will think of something. It seems all of us our now Gammy's, Nana's, and what Mary's will call her.. I think Teri , Mary and myself are going to be the sub for you. We could never take your place... But.. Amanda needs someone.. so we are it. We love you. Talk to you soon....
Amanda Szappanos
August 27, 2008
Mom,
Im just writing you to tell you "hi" and that I miss you a lot...I really wish I had you right now cause it would make a lot of things easier in my life...anyways, I just wanted to write you and tell you the good news "YOUR GONNA BE A GRANDMA"....I know that you would be so happy, and probably crochet her/him everything imaginable. Im so happy you have no idea...This baby is going to be such a joy for me and Aaron. I told dad about this and im not really sure how he feels. Well Just wanted to tell you the good news. Ill talk to you soon!!!
Sammy Bunnell
August 26, 2008
Dearest Friend,
I go meet the girls today for dinner. You will be there I know. It has been a long time since I have seen either one of them. It will not be the same but somehow I need to go. They love and miss you just like me.
I have not heard from Amanda. I was hoping that I could say goodbye before she moved. Mary saw Mom and Pop this weekend. I wished I could have gone. I am trying to get some information to Robin and Mom about the procedure I had.. Hopefully it come through for her.
I better go. I miss you. The girls and I will see you tonight. I love you.
Elizabeth Clark
August 21, 2008
My Darling Daughter,
I have had you on my mind a lot lately, I wish you were here so I could talk to you, I really could use your loving arms around me right now. You were always a comfort to me when ever we talked. Oh how I wish you were still here. There is so much sadness in my life right now I just don't know where to turn. Your sister talks to you all the time as I do. She wishes you were here with her now because she needs you. I tell her you are near her always and are walking through this terrible time in her life with her. Robin is very sick right now. She is full of Cancer. In my heart I know you are near to all of us. I can't believe this is happening to our family. It hurts so bad. I have such a broken heart right now that I don't think it will ever mend. All I do is cry anymore. I don't want God to take my other daughter away from me too. It isn't fair. People tell me to be strong, but it is easier said then done. I'm sorry to tell you this but I don't have anyone else that would understand. I love and miss you so very very much. I wish I could bring you back to me just so I can hold you. It would make me feel better. I look at your picture every morning and tell you I love you so very much and miss you and all you do is smile back at me. Please stay near to me and Robin and watch over us. She tells me every day she loves you and misses you so much and that she will be with you some day soon. It just makes me feel so sad and I cry because I'm loosing another one of my babies. I feel so empty inside and it gets worse as the days go by. I hope you are happy and resting now. Heaven must be as beautiful and peaceful as they write about. You have to save me a place near you. I talk to Mandy and she said she is doing great. I am so happy for her that she has found happiness in her life. I know you would be very proud of her. She has made a big change in her life for the better she said. Mary is coming to see us tomorrow, It will be so nice to see her again. I know how much you loved her. I will give her a big hug for you. Ok??? I haven't talked to Bob for a long time. I hope he is doing better. I do get emails every once in a while from him. I know he misses you terribly.
Well baby girl, I'm gonna go for now. I love you with all my heart and miss you very very much. I'll write again soon.
All my love to you, Mommy xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxooxxoxoxo
Sammy Bunnell
August 20, 2008
Ps.. look for a picture i will be posting of my bday party of all four of us.. i love ya..
Sammy Bunnell
August 20, 2008
Dearest Dawn,
Like Amanda, it has been awhile since I was last here. I still miss you. I was going to see Mom and Pop with Mary and Teri, but cannot get off to go.. I was by the endcap of socks(in Kmart..not Walmart.. i dont go there..) and it reminded me of the "i want one of every color".. i sometimes talk to you on my way home from work.. I love the picture and the poem.. did i mention that..
well, until next time. I love you so much and miss you..
Amanda Szappanos
August 6, 2008
Hey Mom,
I am sorry that I have not been on here in a while. I have been busy with work and trying to figure some things out. Im sure you already know what those are....I am really happy that I have found a man that makes me happier than I have ever been in my entire life. Makes all the other "boys" that I dated seem so superficial. I miss you so very much. Im getting better with time but its like a good quote that I seen on sharkweek ....funny I know I am dork...."Time Doesnt Heal all wounds, it only hides them". That quote couldnt be more true in my eyes. Im sad because I am going to be moving soon and I wont get to come visit you that much. Im kinda scared to leave dad cause I dont want him to be lonely, but I know that I am a big girl and I have to make big girl choices and as much as most of my heart is here in Louisville.....the rest of my heart is in Florida with Aaron.....How dad feels about you not being here is how I feel about him....Its nice to talk to him on the phone everyday and stuff but its not the same as if I see him in person.....I miss him but not as much as I miss you....so give me the guidance to make this big step in my life that I am about to make. I know its for the best and I know that he will take care of me....But dont worry Florida will only be a short-lived dream for me but ill be coming back HOME to Ky where I belong....I love you SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much.....I heard the song "California Love" by TuPAc yesterday and it made me smile because it reminded me of us in the car jammin to that song....Oh yeah everyone can read this note so just know that my mother loved her some Tupac rap music.....I love you....ill talk to you soon!!!!
Sammy Bunnell
August 5, 2008
My dearest Dawn,
I got a wonderful gift from Bob a few days ago. This perfect picture and poem. It means so much. I will cherish it forever and it will go right with my cross so everyone can see how much we love you. One day my friend..Save me a spot.. I cannot wait to hear your laugh again. I love and miss you so much..
Robert Szappanos
July 26, 2008
If my tears were steps...and my memories were a lane...I would walk up to heaven and bring you back home....I love you so much Dawn...My Wife...My best friend..I can only imagine...
Elizabeth Clark
July 21, 2008
My darling daughter Dawn,
I haven't been able to write to you because I went to see Aunt Jo and Uncle George in Florida for a while. I came back home Saturday. I have had you on my mind a lot lately. While I was on the plane coming home I thought about you when I looked out the window. I felt so close to you like you were sitting on the empty seat next to me. It's like being the closest to Heaven you can get. It was so beautiful. I thought about the time when you were 8 weeks old when we flew on a plane with grandma Miklos to Michigan. You were such a beautiful baby and everyone made a big fuss over you. I was such a proud mom. I wish sometimes time could stand still and never change and then you wouldn't have had to go away. I miss you so very much and my heart still aches because you aren't here any more. There isn't a day I don't think about you or nights that I don't cry. But I know you are watching all of us from Heaven. I talked to Mandy whenever I get a chance. She said she is doing ok and misses you terribly. She's coming home to see me and daddy this week end. I am so excited. I know you would be very proud of her because she is trying to make changes in her life that would have made you so happy. But I'm sure you can see it from Heaven and I know you are walking with her every step of the way. You were not only a wonderful mom but a best friend to Mandy and she will treasure that forever. Well my sweet baby girl I have to go now. I just wanted to let you know I've been thinking about you and I promise I will write to you again soon. I love you with all my heart my baby girl and miss you very much. Sleep well my little angel,
All my love, Mommy xoxoxoxoox
Sammy Bunnell
July 16, 2008
Dear Dawn,
I read Bob's entry and wanted to let you know that I miss you.. I think of you everyday. I know it is hard on Bob.. He loves you so much but I know you are right beside him every moment.....Wanted to say I love you and I will see you someday..
Robert Szappanos
June 30, 2008
Dear
Dawn...Not a day goes by that I dont think of you....Not a day goes by that I dont shed tears for you. I miss you more and more each day. Even though I hope and hope that you will come home I must realize that it
will not happen...not in this world. I hope and pray that we will be together some day...I want to hug and kiss you so bad. I look at your pictures each day and think of the time we had together. I look at you nick naks and it reminds me of places we visited and the fun we had. There is still a cup of sea shells that you collected last October when we went for a ride and stopped by Marklin Lock on the Ohio River. I look in your jewlery box and find so much stuff that you kepted from the past and it just makes me cry so much. The closet is still full of you cloths and the house is about the same as it was when you were home
with me and Amanda. I know that I must continue on but it is so hard without you. Bambi and Missy still wonder where you are. Amanda seem to be going better...but I know that she misses you just like me...She
really missed you on her birthday...The first time that she did not get a card from you although I am sure that you were with her on her birthday in sprit as you are every day. It is nice and green around your plot now and the Trees are full of leaves. The Frog wind chimes always seem to be making a nice sound every time I come to visit you....I hope to see you some day dear...I love and miss you so very much.....I can only Imagine....
Elizabeth Clark
May 31, 2008
Hi my little angel,
I just want to tell you me and daddy are coming to see you next week end. I miss you and love you so much. I think about you all the time and listen to your voice on my cell-phone. It makes me cry because I can't see you any more. I want the hurt to go away so bad but it's still there in my heart. I don't think it will ever go away. People tell me it will take a lot of time for the hurt to go away, but I doubt if it ever will. I just hope you are happy and not hurting anymore. Every day is a challenge to get through because you are always on my mind. I still don't sleep well at night. I can still feel me holding your delicate hand in mine the night you went to Heaven. Oh how I wish God wouldn't have taken you away from all of us. I feel like I lost my best friend. That's what Mothers and Daughters are suppose to be, Right????? I wonder if you hear me when I talk to you before I go to bed at night. I sure hope you can. Please watch over all of us that love you so much. Sleep well my darling daughter. I will see you soon and will bring you flowers.
All my love forever, Mommy xooxoxxoxoxoxo
Sammy Bunnell
May 30, 2008
Hello my friend.. Well, i talked to Teri and Mary today. We are planning on having lunch this weekend with them. I will wear my button as always, this way you can come too. I miss you more than anyone will ever realize. Jesse says he misses you too. Tom got a girlfriend. You would love her. Her name is Jasmine. He wears his Superman watch you gave him and talks about you to others always. I better go. I am starting to cry as I always do. I love you my friend. Piece of cake .. Piece of pie..
Amanda Szappanos
May 27, 2008
Hey Mom,
Just wanted to tell you that I love you!!! I wish you could meet Aaron, you would really like him. I Miss you a lot, but it getting a little better for me cause I just think about you and smile, I know that you are with me ALWAYS.....
Robert Szappanos
May 25, 2008
This day is for you also...Dawn...As a veteran of the USAF...Your headstone is now in place and it makes it even harder to see your name on it. I wish that I could understand why a person like you was taken from all of us. I am reminded every day how much you loved GOD and how your cared for all of you friends. I just does not make sense to me why you were taken...You did so much good and would have continued to do so....All of your stuff is still in the same places...Please come home....I love you and miss you sooo much...I only wish that I could hold you just one more time.....and tell you that I love you....just one more time.....
Elizabeth Clark
May 17, 2008
My Darling Daughter,
I've been meaning to get on here to write to you to let you know you are always on my mind and in my heart but it's been so hard because I look at daddy and keep thinking of you you how sick you were before you went to Heaven. It is totaly breaking my heart and bringing back so many sad memories that they just don't want to go away. My heart is hurting today as much as it did the day you left all of us. I cry all the time because I miss you terribly. Mother's day wasn't the best day in my life by far. I kept looking at your picture and was wishing you could call me to talk to me and the phone didn't ring. So many things are going wrong in my life right now that it's like having a bad dream or nightmare. I look at daddy and see you and it hurts so bad. I want to come and see you but I have to wait until daddy feels better so he can make the trip. As soon as he can I will come and bring you pretty flowers. If only God could have made you better so you didn't have to die and leave me so soon. We still had a lot of things to do together that will never happen now. I love you so very much. I tried to be the best mom ever to you and I hope you knew that. I couldn't have been more proud of you for the person you were. A mother couldn't have asked God to give her a better daughter then you were. You were truly a gem and one in a million. I treasure all the times we spent and talked together. They will remain in my heart forever. I promise you I will come and see you soon. Thank you for loving me so much my angel. Some day I will see you and we can reunite our mother and daughter relationship and be together forever. Sleep well my little angel and keep warm and happy.
All my love, mommy xooxoxoxoxoxox
Happy Belated Mother's Day
Amanda Szappanos
May 14, 2008
MOM,
Sorry I havent been on here in a while...Ive been so busy with work and everything else. At least im staying busy RiGht? Keep my mind off missing you sometimes....Not really but I can keep telling myself that. You would be proud of me, even though I think that you had a big part in all this. I feel like my life is finally starting to come together. Things in my life are working out great and panning out more and more each day. Ive had probably the best month of my life and I just hope things keep getting better and better. I think you need to talk to the big man upstairs and come up with something to help daddy not cry as much. I try to help, but it just doesnt seem to work. I know how much he misses you cause I feel the same but It just would be nice to see a smile on his face sometimes instead of a frown.....Well I miss you a lot and I love you ALOT....it amazes me how much I look like you...I never really realized it untill now....hey at least im pretty right!!! J/K...well I will write you soon!!!!!
LOVE
doug dunaway
May 13, 2008
happy mothers day mrs. d! Thinking of you all the time. Keep smiling!!
Sammy Bunnell
May 12, 2008
Dearest Dawn,
I wanted to take time to tell you Happy Mother's Day. I know its late.. but I miss you so very much. There is not a day that goes by that I dont think of you. I wondered today if my heart would heal the aching I feel when I think of you and your smile and that laugh that could be heard throughout Wally World. You falling in the floor, us almost wetting our pants from the laughter. I know you are with our Lord and one day we will be falling at our makers feet laughing and having a good time again. I love you my friend.
Robert Szappanos
May 11, 2008
Happy Mothers Day...Dawn....To my Wife to the Mother of our daughter..I love you and miss you so much....Just as its been cloudy and rainy today so are my eyes. Sleep my dear you deserve the rest...
Elizabeth Clark
April 29, 2008
Hi my baby girl,I just want to let you know I love and miss you so very much. There isn't a day that goes by that I'm not thinking of you. You are always on my mind. I just wish God would have given us a little more time to spend together before He took you with Him. Mother's Day is coming up soon and I know you won't be calling me. My heart just aches so bad because I'll never see you anymore. Sometimes I get angry at God for taking you away from me. There are days that are so difficult to get through because I miss you so much. I'm working on the afghan you started making for Doug. I thought I would finish it for you. I know he will treasure it forever because he loved you too. Here's a poem I wrote for you. I hope you can see it and that you like it.
My Darling Daughter Dawn
I wish there was something God could have done
because the battle you fought could have been won
I don't understand why He took you away
because now it's so difficult getting through each day
There are no words to describe the pain in my heart
cause when you left me, it tore me apart
I know you're in Heaven where it's beautiful and bright
along side of our Saviour in that golden light
When you walked through His gates, the trumpets did sound
We was waiting for you with all His angels around
He knew you were coming that cold winter night
that's what His plans were, so you would no longer fight
He told me not to weep for you, that you would be okay
just to keep you in my prayers when I go to bed and pray
I'll always love you more then words can ever say
Until we meet in Heaven, when He comes for me one day
So sleep well my loving daughter, you're in Heaven and at Peace
there's no more suffering or pain you feel, you are now with your Lord.
All my love forever,
mommy XOXOXOXO
Robert Szappanos
April 29, 2008
I would lime to share this poem that I picked out for a memorial picture
from the cemetery..
God looked around His garden
and He found an empty place.
He then looked down upon this earth, and saw your tired face.
He put his arms around you
and lifted you to rest.
God's garden must be beautiful,
He always takes the best.
He knew that you were suffering,
He knew you were in pain.
He knew that you would never
get well on earth again.
He saw the road was getting rough and the hills were hard to climb.
So He closed your weary eyelids,
and whispered, "Peace be thine."
It broke our hearts to lose you but you didn't go alone, For part of us
went with you
the day God called you home.
I hope that you lik the peom that I chose...Dawn...I know that I have
to belive in this poem...but i miss you so much and just wish I could
hug you again and hold your hand......
marian spanos
April 17, 2008
Dear Bob and Amanda and Family,
Yesterday I was cleaning up a bedroom. There on the bed was a doll that Dawn had given me. I had been her secret sister at church. I couldn't help myself. I just went overboard giving her things. ( I now know why) Our time limit was a year and then we would choose another secret sister. After the year was over, she came to church with a gift for me. Wasn't that just like Dawn! It was a beautiful baby doll with a porceline face. She gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.Her face was lit with her famous smile. I am so blessed to have known her. I miss her. Marian Spanos
Robert Szappanos
April 10, 2008
Hello
Dear....I still have not been able to come to the fact that you are no
longer here in body...even though I know that you are near me in
spirit. I was just looking at your picture on the dining room table and
the tears started to flow again. I just cannot believe that you are
gone. I had to go see Debbie at your Wal Mart today and it was very
hard to go into your store. I expected to hear your voice and
laugh...but it was not there. I see alot of familiar faces and it
brings back memories of you. Missy and Bambi miss you very much. I will
be coming out to see you tomorrow with some fresh flowers. Please stay
close to Me and Amanda....We need you very much.....
Amanda Szappanos
April 10, 2008
Hey Mom,
I just wanted to write you cause I have some down time at work. I miss you.....its so warm outside but it looks like its going to rain....:( I promise that I am going to stop by soon.....I need to come talk to you....XOXOX
Geraldine Macuga
April 10, 2008
Dear Amanda and Bob;
My prayers and thoughts are with you both at this time of grief. I know you both are hurting very much. In time that wil soften . But it will take awhile.I know Dawn is watching over both of you ,and she will always be with you. God Bless You Both.
Love You Both
oxoxoxoxoxox Aunt Geri
Elizabeth Clark
April 9, 2008
Hi Baby Girl,
Just want to let you know I'm thinking about you. Nothing is the same since you went away. There have been days that I wish I could talk to you when I'm feeling sad. And I have had many of them lately. You always made me feel better after we talked for a while. I miss you so much. I look at your picture every day and wish you were still here. It just isn't the same without you anymore. I lit a candle for you, Bob and Mandy at church Sunday. I light one every Sunday for all of you. I know you're watching over all of us. I pray every night and ask God to take care of you. Daddy said he was going to bring me down to see you soon. I'm gonna bring you some pretty flowers too. Mandy gave me some of your frogs and I put them on my pillow. Missy lays by them all the time. She misses you too and so does Muffy. They lay on the mattress you laid on when you were last home. You left an imprint in their hearts because they loved you also. Anyway baby girl, I'm gonna go for now. I will write to you again soon.
I love you my darling daughter.
All my love, Mommy XOXOOXXOOXOXOOOXOXXOXOXO
Sammy Bunnell
April 9, 2008
My Dearest Friend,
It has been two long months.. Seems like just yesterday. I think of you everyday.. several times a day in fact. that will never change....
Its cloudy outside today.. this silly weather cant make up its mind.... i miss you more today than usual.... I hope to walk this year in Relay for Life.... I will be wearing your pin and keeping you close to me.. I love you my friend.
doug dunaway
April 9, 2008
mrs d,
I had already written happy bday but i guess the computer didnt take it. So, HAPPY BDAY!!! I hope it was a great one, i miss you, everyone does.
Love,
DOug
Amanda Szappanos
April 8, 2008
Hey Mom,
The Sun is shining today and its soOoOo warm outside and I Just wanted to say HI to you cause I know that you are saying HI to me...I miss you a lot.....But Im doing Ok though.....Its still very hard but its getting a little easier.....Ill talk to you soon, as well as come to visit.
XOXOXO I LOVE YOU!!!
Amanda Szappanos
April 4, 2008
Hey MOM,
I am at work and I was just thinking about you so I wanted to write you a note. I am going to Cincinatti this weekend to hang out and go to a Red's game. It should be really fun. I just wanted to tell you that I want you to come with me cause I MISS YOU!!!....I wish you were here, then I wouldnt have to worry so much about being alone...and I would have my best friend back....Well I love you and Ill talk to you soon
XOXOXO
Amanda Szappanos
April 1, 2008
MOM,
Just wanted to let you know that I celebrated your birthday with Jenni and we baked a cake for you and sang happy birthday. It was nice. I figured instead of crying about you not being here I would celebrate the times that I did have with you. I hope that your birthday was wonderful in Heaven. I know that God gave you a awesome Birthday gift because he gave you eternal life. I love you, I miss you.....XOXOXO
Kayla Kean
March 31, 2008
Happy Birthday Dawn!!!
I so wish that I could have met you. I remember talking on the phone with you a couple of times. I still wish I could have met you in person so I could give you a great big Humongous hug!!! You were always so kind and generous to think of me all the time, both you and Bob. With all the goodies you would give to me. Thank You so much, I will never forget you. And I promise to take very special care of baby girl, she is precious to me. I sleep with her every night. I won't forget that FROG means Forever Rely on God, and I will do just that!
Wow, every day must be like the best Birthday with the Lord. Hope your having the time of your life.
Just so you know, I think the world of Bob we are such good buddies!
We know he misses you so very much. What a blessing it is to know him. I hope he knows we are praying for God's comfort and peace and much healing upon his family. Well, goodbye for now but not forever.
much love with huggles and kisses
Kayla Brianne Kean
ps.. Don't worry we'll take good care of Bob
Robert Szappanos
March 31, 2008
Happy Birthday Honey....I hope that you like the flowers...They are from all of us...I know that you like red roses. I miss you so much and I wish that I could just hug you one more time and tell you that I love you.....Please stay near me...I need you now more than ever.....I love you very much......
My HEART
Amanda Szappanos
March 31, 2008
Mom,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Im sure that you are having party in Heaven. Hope its wonderful for you. I put your gift where you rest, I hope that you like it. I miss you very Much and Love you Very much.....Have a wonderful birthday
Love you
Elizabeth Clark
March 31, 2008
Happy Birthday baby girl,
I woke up this morning and the first thing I thought of was you. I went over to your picture and kissed you and wished you a Happy Birthday and of course I cried really hard. A Mother's heart never quits hurting for her children when something happens to them, it just never goes away. It was 48 years ago that I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, which was you. I can remember how happy I was when the nurse brought you over to me and laid you in my arms. I was so happy I cried with tears of joy. I could hardly wait to bring you home. I remember when I bought your first pair of patten leather buckle shoes, and I dressed you up with a pretty dress that I had made for you and put your buckle shoes on. You looked so pretty.
I love you and miss you so very much my darling daughter. Today is going to be a very hard day for me, Dad, Bob and Amanda to get through. We all miss you so very bad. It's kind of hard not to cry because we all love and miss you so much. It hurts because I can't even talk to you on the phone like we use to do, and I couldn't send you your birthday card I had bought for you a long time ago. I couldn't come to visit you for your birthday so I made you a pretty bouquet of flowers and put them next to your picture. I think you would like them. Some of the flowers are purple which I know was one of your favorite colors, as it was mine. I just know you would like the bouquet and I know you can see them from Heaven. Mandy came home and she saw them and said they were nice. I was so happy to see her. We went to visit her other grandparents and she put a heart wreath of flowers on their grave. It was nice spending time alone with her. I can feel your presense around me all the time no matter where I am or what I'm doing. Thank you for loving me so much. All mothers should have the love that you gave to me. It came straight from your loving heart. I will treasure all the memories I have of you and the love you had for me in my heart forever. I hope you're celebrating your birthday today in Heaven with Jesus. I know you're watching over Bob and Amanda and me and Daddy. Please ask God to heal Daddy with his cancer so it will go away. I'm so worried and scared.
Well my darling baby girl "Happy Birthday" again and pretend I'm holding you in my arms like I did when you were first born. I can't write anymore to you because I can't see what I'm typing from my tears running down my face. I promise I will write again soon.
Sleep well my baby girl and always remember mommy loves and misses you.
All my love, Mommy
XOOXOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOO
My beautiful Dawn and me
Elizabeth Clark
March 28, 2008
Hi my sweet baby girl, I just thought I would let you know I was thinking about you this morning. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about you. I miss you so much. I wish I could talk to you and tell you how much I love you. I need your sweet voice to hear now so badly. You always know what to say to me when I'm down in the dumps or when something isn't going right for me. I'm having such a difficult time getting through each day without your phone calls and I don't know what to do anymore. I need you so badly now. Daddy has his cancer back and I'm just beside myself. I don't know how much more my heart can handle anymore. You always would telll me everythings going to be okay, but I can't hear you say that to me. I want God to give you back to me but I know that isn't going to happen. I pray every night that you are happy and warm in Gods arms. I know He will take care of you until I come to Heaven to be with you. I email Bob to say hi and to let him know we are thinking about him and to tell him we love him and Mandy very much. Me and daddy are going to go to see them when we come to visit with you soon. I'll bring you some pretty flowers, okay sweety baby? I look at your picture everytime I'm in the livingroom and when I get up in the morning and before I go to bed at night. I kiss you all the time and I cry because I miss you terribly bad.Mandy is coming home to see me and daddy. I'm so happy she is because I miss her and Bob so much. I'll give her a big kiss and hug for you. Okay!!!!! I thought you would like to know that me,daddy and buddy go to church every Sunday. I know you would be happy to hear that. Well my angel I'm going to go for now because I want to make dinner so Mandy will have something to eat when she gets here. I love you baby girl with all my heart. Sleep well and sweet dreams.
All my love, Mommy
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Amanda Szappanos
March 26, 2008
Mommy,
I just wanted to write you and tell you hello. Im sure you know how I feel right now. Im ready to give up. I feel like there is no hope for anything good in my life right now. I really miss you, the talks we used to have, the days we would spend enjoying our time together. Oh how I wish I could have that back. People dont really understand a whole lot about what I am feeling or how bad im hurting, and i dont really like to talk about it cause I dont want to burden people with my issues. I am going to seek therapy cause I know it is way passed needed. Please be with me everyday, your really the person that gives me HOPE right now. I look at my foot and the frog tattoo and I think of you. Just please come with me on my rides from now on. I know GOD has taken the wheel so many times for me cause sometimes I dont even remember how I get home. Im really trying, i know you believe me. I love you and miss you so very much.
Pat Rosenthal
March 25, 2008
I miss Dawn very much, her smiles, hugs & kisses. She was always so very cheerful & made you feel good just to be around her. She was a very special friend and addition to our church family.
Sammy Bunnell
March 23, 2008
Dawn,
Happy Easter...I thinking of you today..but what is different from any other day. I miss you my friend.. I was singing in church this morning and during invitation.. I went to the altar to pray. I always pray for Bob and Amanda and your family... Today was not any different....The only difference,,, i will not see you Monday to tell you about my day and hear how yours was.. My heart aches all the time. you knew how much you meant to me.. we shared something that now alot of people get to share.. I look for the day where I can continue our conversation where we left off... i love you Dawn..
Robert Szappanos
March 23, 2008
Happy Easter Honey....It is a nice sunny day today. I just wanted to let you know that I love you very much and miss you. I still try to go through some of you stuff and end up crying. I found some baby picture of you with Buddy...Robin and you Mom. You were about 6 to 9 months old. In all ofd the picture you were such a happy baby. See I am starting to cry already. I also found old ticket stubs that you kept of different places we have gone over the years. I am so glad that you saved this stuff because it means a lot to me now looking at it and brings bach memories of places we went to see. I am still having a hard time understanding why you were taken away from us. I pray for an answer...but maybe you might be able to help me also. I just dont understand right now. I miss the rides we went on and going out to eat. I try going out now and just end up coming back home because it is not the same. Even when I do go somewhere I think of when you were with me and remember the exact spot you were standing at when you were with me. I want to understand so bad right now why you were taken from me. You were good to everyone and you loved GOD and your church and the childeren you teached. Well i have to go to work in a little while. I love you and miss you sooooo much....Please watch over Me and Amanda and your Mom and Dad. I cant wait for the day when I can hug you again and kiss you.....maybe then we could go for a ride.....I love you sooo much....
Sammy Bunnell
March 21, 2008
Dawn,
Every time I go to write something in here.. my heart starts to pound and tears come to my eyes. I miss you so much my friend. I curl up with the blanket you made me and i just moved the glass chicken you gave me for my birthday. it now faces my kitchen table so i can say hello every morning over coffee. i don't go to our store anymore.. it isn't the same.. i am sad.. i love you so much.. i miss you more than anyone will know.
love,
Sammy Bunnell
Elizabeth Clark
March 19, 2008
Hi my Baby Girl,
I was going through pictures this morning and found one of you and me at your sister's wedding and you looked so beautiful. I put it next to the one you sent to me on my entertainment center so I can look at you. You follow me wherever I am in the livingroom. I know you are watching over me because you said you would when you went to Heaven one day.
I am so sad today because I miss you so much. I wish I could talk to you again and tell you how much I love you and kiss your soft cheeks like I use to. My nights are so long because I can't sleep and all I do is think about you and cry. I miss your phone calls before we would go to bed at night. Now, I can't even hear your voice and it hurts so bad because I know we can't talk to each other anymore. I wish you could come back to me so I can hold you in my arms again. My heart just aches so bad.
I shared the picture you gave to me with Bob and Mandy so you can watch over them too because I know you loved them so very much. It isn't fair you had to leave us.
I wish I could bring you back home and make you well so you wouldn't have to leave all of us who love you. My life isn't the same without you baby girl. When God took you away, He took part of my heart. They say, a mother's heart never mends once it's broken, Whoever said that, they were right.
You know baby girl, Bob and Mandy miss you so much. I talked to Bob on the phone and I can hear the hurt in his voice, he loves and misses you so bad. We both end up crying on the phone together. My heart aches for him and Mandy.
I put my bear you had made for me in my rocking chair you sat in the last time you were home, it's sitting next to Susie. They look so cute next to each other. I also found some letters you wrote to me and I sat and read them. I will treasure them forever. When God comes for me, I'm bringing them with me so we can read them together. Does that sound okay with you??? Well baby girl, I can't write anymore to you now because I'm having trouble seeing through my tears. I will write to you soon. Sleep well and keep nice and warm. Buddy and daddy said to say hi and to tell you they love and miss you.
I love you sweetie baby. All my love, Mommy OXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOXOOX
Robert Szappanos
March 16, 2008
Honey..I miss you so much. I went for a ride today to Taylorsville Lake and went to the picnic area that I used to take you to. Remember I would take you there so you can walk a little and we would sit on the bench and talk. Well I sat on the exact bench that we sat on and talked to you. I hoped that you heard me. How I wish that you were there sitting next to me so I could hold your hand. Me and Amanda went to see you a few days ago. The lowers look nice and I hope that you like the little frog. I gave your little bear with the frog dress to Kayla and she loved it. I told her to remember that frog stands for...Forever rely on GOD. I knwo that she will take good care of it and I know that you would want her to have it. Mom sent me a picture of you that you had taken a few years ago. This was the first time that I saw this picture. You look so beautiful in it. I hope that you like the frame that I got for it. No matter how I look at it your eyes are always looking at me. You are so pretty. O how I miss you and cry for you. Please let me know that you are around...PLEASE. I know that you are but it is so hard to to have you around. I miss the rides with you and going out to eat with you. I found a vidio on you cell phone when you were in the hospital and you say a few words on it. I watch and listen to it alot so I can remember the sound of your voice. I went to yous store yesterday to get some medicine for Missy...and I had to leave in a hurry beacuse I was wating to hear your laugh or vioce in the distance...plus seeing familiar faces in the store. Well Honey you take care and plase stay near to Me and Amanda and your Mom and Dad. I love you Soooooo Much....
Darleen Fay
March 11, 2008
Dawn,
Hi I'm your cousin Darleen. I know I didn't know you very well, I'm sure I met you when I was a little girl. I am grown now with a family of my own. Reading all the wonderful messages our family has been sending to you makes me wish that I would have known you alot better. I hear plenty of stories from Nana, and Aunt Peanut (my mom) about you and your wonderful family. Enjoy your time in heaven with Jesus and watch over us always, until we see you again soon. Love your cousin, Darleen
Bob, Amanda and the whold family, I want to say thankyou for taking such good care of your wife, mother, daughter, friend and my cousin Dawn. She was definately a lucky women to have such a loving and caring family. I know I don't know you hardly at all but, I just wanted to tell you that you are in my prayers always. I hope that you know that she is now healthy, happy, and safe in heaven with Jesus, watching over us, waiting for when we can see her again in heaven. Thank you again for loving her so much. I know its very hard for you because she is not here anymore but I know in my heart she is happy in heaven with Jesus. I'm sorry I didn't get to know her more. Everyday Aunt Peanut and Nana tell me great stories of how much of a beautiful person she is... I pray for you everyday hoping that your pain will be eased soon... Love you all bunches and bunches... Sending you love from above...
Darleen
Dawn's 7th grade picture
March 8, 2008
March 8, 2008
March 8, 2008
Elizabeth Clark
March 8, 2008
Dear Bob and Amanda,
I've had you both on my mind today and hope you both are doing okay. I want to call you but it's hard to talk to anyone because all I do is cry as I know you do also. It's seams like forever since Dawn went to Heaven and I know how terribly bad you miss her as we do. The hurt we have in our hearts just don't want to go away. They say every day it will get easier for it to stop hurting but I'm afraid it doesn't. Broken hearts don't mend that easy. My eyes always swell up with tears whenever I think of her or look at her picture as I know yours does to. The weather here is horrible and so cold and it makes me sad because the sun isn't shining. I hope God is keeping her warm in His loving arms for all of us. She told me once before He took her to Heaven that He would take care of her and I have to believe He is. I'm sure she is looking down on all of us and her best friends. I can hardly wait for you to get the picture I'm sending to you Bob. You will see what I was telling you about her watching you all the time, when you see it. It will always stay where I put it as long as I live. You had such a beautiful wife Bob, and Amanda had such a beautiful mother. I can truly say I had a beautiful daughter and she was my best friend. I am going to miss her loving smile and her phone calls at night. The nights are the hardest for me as I know they surely are for the both of you. She had such a big and loving heart for everyone and she truly showed it to all of us. I'm sure she knows what a wonderful job you did taking care of her Bob. And I thank you for it. And I know she loved you both very very much. Always remember that. I talk to her every night before I go to bed and in the mornings. I even share a cup of tea with her. I wish she didn't have to go away from us so soon. It's so hard to get through every day without talking to her. All the love we had for her will somehow keep us going through these tough days ahead. I have to believe that. Every time the sun shines I know she is smiling and watching over all of us. I want you to know I love you both very very much. I will talk to you soon.
Love, Mom Clark XOOXOXOXOXO
"Sleep well my baby girl". Love, Hugs and kisses from me, Your Loving Mother
Elizabeth Clark
March 7, 2008
Well baby girl, today is a whole month since you went to Heaven and it seems like forever. I just can't believe you've been gone this long already. I miss you more and more every day. And I can't stop crying because I know I won't see you any more.I guess what hurts me the most is that we didn't get to spend enough time together because you lived so far away from me. But what time we did have, I will treasure forever. I can see your smiling face in front of me or when we were on the phone chatting, and you would tell me," mama don't cry everything is going to be okay", whenever I was upset about something. I look at your picture all the time and you follow me where ever I go. Your picture makes you look so very real like you never went away from all of us. I hope you're very happy where you're at now. It must be a beautiful place from what I've been told. Just think baby girl, you get to spend a whole lot of time with people, like you're grandpa, you never got to see when you were born. I know your grandpa would have loved you so much. He was a wonderful man. Yesterday the sun was shining so bright and today it is so gloomy and very cold outside. I hope the sun is shining for you today. There are no words to describe what a wonderful daughter you were to me. You were such a kind, caring, unselfish and loving person and you put others before yourself no matter what situation came about. I know you will get many rewards in Heaven for all the good deeds you have done through your life. I'm sure He is taking good care of you for us.
I love you my baby girl, Sleep well and dweet dreams.
All my love,Mommy
Joan Murphy
March 7, 2008
Robert,
I read the things you put into the guest book to my beloved neice Dawn, and they bring tears to my eyes. You really must have loved her so very much. My heart breaks for you as it does for my sister Betty and her husband Bud. I am so sorry that we really didn't get to know one another better, as I really had to get my husband George back to Florida. As it was he was put in the hospital. He is now back on the road to recovery. I pray for you and Amanda every night as I do for my sister and her family and for all who loved Dawn so very much. And to the family at Wal-Mart there in Louisville, God Bless Them Also.
Peace be with you. And remember I am thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers.
Jo...........................
Amanda Szappanos
March 6, 2008
Mom,
I am just writing you this letter to tell you that I am thinking about you. Its been a month since I last seen you and it really sucks. People think that I am doing ok and that I am so "strong", but what they dont see is what I do when I am in my car or alone....Its not easy for me at all, but I have to be strong for the people around me. I know that you are giving me that strength everyday. I know you are here, you remind me everyday. I love you, i miss you, PLEASE COME HOME
Love
My daughter Dawn
March 6, 2008
Elizabeth Clark
March 6, 2008
Hi Baby Girl,
It's almst a month since God took you to Heaven and I'm missing you more and more. Every day that goes by the hurt doesn't get any easier. It just doesn't want to go away. I know you are in a better place but it doesn't take the hurt from my heart or the tears I cry for you away. I miss you more then anyone can ever imagine. When your a mother and you loose your child it's like taking a piece of your heart away from you and it doesn't mend, it just stays that way. I just feel so alone without you around anymore. I did do one thing you asked of me, I went back to church. I go every Sunday now. You taught me how to love the Lord and I know He will always be there for me like He was for you. I also know one day we will see each other again and it will be a wonderful reunion for us. You have to be patient and wait for me to come to you. Hopefully it won't be too far away. I try to remember the happy times we spent together, especially when you were home and we were making the quilt you finished that we started together. Remember, we called it the "The Changing Hands". We had so much fun doing it.I feel like I lost my best friend. We have no control over God's plans for all of us, but I know that one day He will give you back to me in Heaven. I Know you're watching over me, Bob and Amanda and all of your other friends. Every where I go you are with me always. Well baby girl I'm going to go now. Sleep well and have sweet dreams. I love you with all my heart and miss you terribly.
All my love, hugs and kisses, Mommy xooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Robert Szappanos
March 6, 2008
Well Honey....It was a month ago since I last held you in my arms. With all of you family and friends around I held you and told you that I love you and said that it was OK to go night night as you took your last breath. I know that you are in a better place BUT I miss you so much and just want to be able to hold you and take care of you. Your pillow is still on the bed just incase you want to come back home. Bambi and Missy still look around the house for you...but I think they know that you are not coming back home. I still cry for you every day and always think about you...I know that it is hard on Amanda but she seems to be taking it better then me...at least when she is around me. I was lloking at some pictures when we went to Northern Michigan a few years ago and to Savanah Georgia. We sure had fun and I have the Sea shells that you were always picking up. Do you remember sitting in the evening at the Soo Locks watching the big ships coming through and driving up to Wawa Canada. At least I have the pictures to look at but o how I wish you were here right now. I know that you are looking over me. I just dont understand why this happened to you...you never hurted anyone and was alway swilling to help in any way you loved God so much as I am finding out looking at some of you things. Even at work it is hard as i think about you so much and just start to cry. The peole there understand and just give me my space and are there to help me if I need it. Evertime i drive your car i feel that you are sitting next to me...I talk to you alot. I still have the dryed up flower on the dash...the last flower you picked when we went to the park in November. It will always remain there....Honey I love you so much and miss you. Please watch over me and Amanda and Mom and Dad. I would like to thank all that have posted on this site and I have extened it till march of 2009. I love you all....
Mom 5 months,Joe 6 months
March 5, 2008
Mom and Joe , ( cousin)
Aunt Peanut Biddle
March 5, 2008
Dear Bob and Amanda, I'm sending a photo I came across when Your Wife Bob and Mother Mandy was a Baby. It was taken with your cousin Joe Biddle. He was 9 months and she was 8 months in the one, and the other they were 6 and 5 months. I thought you might like to have these.I know she would like me to share with the two of you. We have nice memories that will always be in our hearts. We Love You Both, Aunt Peanut and Uncle Cloyd
Elizabeth Clark
March 5, 2008
My darling daughter Dawn,
I just don't know how to begin this letter to tell you just how empty my heart is since God took you away from me. It isn't fair that He gave you to me and then took you away so soon. You were still so very young. Every time I look at your picture I cry because it hurts so bad that I can't talk to you or see you any more. I know He's got all the love I have for you locked inside your heart the day He took you to Heaven with Him. There isn't a day that goes by that you aren't on my mind. I miss our mother and daughter chats that we had when we would tell each other our feelings and whats deep down in our hearts. I wanted to bring you flowers but you are so far away from me, so I put a vase a flowers next to your picture so you can see them. I love and miss you so very much. You told me once if God took you before me you would always watch over me from Heaven. I feel you around me all the time. Some day soon I will be with you forever. Remember always that mommy loves you so very much. Love and miss you . Hugs and Kisses. Sweet Dreams my baby
girl.
Love, Mommy
doug dunaway
March 5, 2008
mrs D,
Hello mrs dawn. Ive been thinking of you a lot lately and though we werent close for long i developed strong love for you and your daughter that will never go away. I know that you are resting now and watching over bob and manda, and they will be ok with all the people around who love them. Im gonna take good care of manda so if i do anything wrong im sure i will get a sign from ya! Show some people up there our handshake because my little sis and you are the only ones who knew it. I miss you, i love you.
DOug
Amanda Szappanos
March 4, 2008
MOM,
So i was reading this book called "motherless daughters" last night and I realized that this is gonna be harder than I thought. Its really weird coming home at night to an empty house with all of your memories in it....I miss you so much. I wish that HEAVEN had a phone number where I could call you and talk to you....I just want to hear you tell me you love me and that your thinking about me, even thought I know you are. I hope you like the frog tattoo that I got in memory of you. Its on my foot so hopefully I can walk in your footsteps and be as PERFECT as you were.....I miss you mom, please dont forget me.....I LOVE YOU
Joan Murphy
March 4, 2008
Dear Robert and Amanda,
You are in our thoughts so very often these days. With the lost of your precious Dawn, Robert and your Mother Mandy.I know in our hearts that she is smilling down on you and letting you know that she is fine. You are both in her hearts.
Our Love to you both.
George and Joan Murphy xo
To My Sister and Brother In-Law, Arthur and Elizabeth Clark, I Love You Both very much, And the lost of your daughter Dawn and my neice is very heavy on your hearts as is her husband Bob and daughter Mandy. She is now at peace and in our dear Lord Jesus's arms.
God Bless All Of You.
Jo
Elizabeth Clark
February 29, 2008
Hi Baby Girl,
I miss you so much. There isn't a day that goes by that I'm not thinking of you. I miss our phone chats at night before we would go to sleep and you would tell me how much you love me. I'm hurting so bad because I can't see you any more and I cry a lot because I can't hold you any more. I know you're in a much prettier place then here and you're not suffering anymore but it doesn't take the hurt in my heart away. Please do me a favor baby girl, tell grandma and grandpa to take care of you for me and give them both a big hug and kiss from me. I love you baby girl.
Love, hugs and kisses, Mommy
ROBERT SZAPPANOS
February 28, 2008
DEAR
DAWN..I MISS YOU SO MUCH. MY NIGHTS ARE SO LONELY AND MY DAYS ARE SO
SAD. I FIGHT BACK TEARS BUT END UP LOOSING THE BATTLE. IT IS HARD FOR
ME RIGHT NOW TO UNDERSTAND WHY GOD TOOK YOU AWAY FROM ME. MAYBE SOME
DAY I WILL UNDERSTAND THAT BUT RIGHT NOW I DO NOT. YOU LOVED GOD SO
MUCH AND LOVED YOUR CHUCH AND THE KIDS THAT YOU TEACHED EVERY WEEK AND
GOD. IT SEEMED AS IF YOU WERE DOING A GOOD JOB FOR HIM HERE ON EARTH.
EVERYWHERE I TURN IN THE HOUSE REMINDS ME OF YOU. WHEN I GO FOR A SHORT
DRIVE I THINK OF YOU SITTING NEXT TO ME. EVERYONE HAS TOLD ME OF THIS
PROCESS THAT I AM GOING THROUGH AND WHAT IS STILL AHEAD...BUT IT IS SO
HARD RIGHT NOW...I COME TO SEE YOU JUST ABOUT EVERY DAY AND LONG FOR
THE DAY WHEN I WILL BE NEXT TO YOU....HOW I WISH I COULD JUST HOLD YOU
IN MY ARMS JUST ONE MORE TIME. I JUST WANT TO LET YOU KNOW THAT I LOVE
YOU VERY MUCH AND WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU...DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST
MEET YOU THE NICKNAME I GAVE YOU....SUNSHINE....WELL AS I AM WRITING
THIS NOTE THE SUN IS OUT AND THE SKY IS BLUE....I THINK THAT YOU ARE
TELLING ME THAT I AM NEAR AND ALWAYS WILL BE. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND
MISS YOU. PLEASE STAY NEAR TO ME....
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