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Gail Burns-Smith Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for Gail Burns-Smith
September 8, 2010
September 8, 2010
September 8, 2010
September 8, 2010
September 8, 2010
September 8, 2010
Roger Kalafut
September 5, 2010
Hi Gail
Its been a year since you left us. Family and friends will be at your beach house celebrating your life and remembering you. This is a special day for us. We will keep you in our hearts always and teach our children what a wonderful person you are. I know you will be looking down on us today and every day.
Love always and miss you
Mo and Rog
Patti Burns
February 11, 2010
getting ready to leave for vacation and my heart is very heavy.you loved vacation and this is something I wanted to share with you.Everyday I miss you.
Roger Kalafut
December 25, 2009
Today is our first Christmas with out you. I have been so sad I keep telling Rog that I look around and I have so much to be happy about Brennen, Connor Mollie, and your little guy Eli and yet I have such n overwhelming whole.I miss you so much. MERRY CRISTMAS in heaven.I Love you,Maureen
October 2, 2009
It's just shy of a month since you left us and I am still trying to wrap my head around you not being here anymore. I did not talk to you everyday, but knew I always could if I needed too. You were a mentor, and an advisary, a warm soul that always had a smile for me and I am having the hardest time moving on. At the wedding on the west coast I know you were there watching your son pledge himself to the woman that he loves. We all smiled and had a good time, but my heart was still heavy because you were not physically there. My memories are strong and I will hold them in my heart forever. I love you and miss you sis.
Tom
Laura Lockwood
September 18, 2009
Thank you, Gail, for your tireless work to assist victims and survivors. You will be missed. My deep condolences to your family.
Sharlene Kerelejza
September 17, 2009
Gail has been on my short-list of true-to-life heros since the early 90's, when I first saw her name on the "Silent No More" poster and quickly scribbled my own signature on the poster at my college campus.
She grew from being a brave survivor to an inspiration, colleague, and mentor over the many years since; as I joined the violence against women's movement in 1993. There is so much I will always hold on to, including you constantly challenging me to stay active, passionate, and compassionate in a trying fight.
You will always have my love and gratitude for helping mold me into the advocate I am today. Your torch will remain lit and held by many.
To Gail's family and closest friends, there are no words. I am so sorry. May we keep her alive in how we honor her.
Kathy Fawcett
September 14, 2009
To Gail's family:
Please accept my deepest sympathies. It has been years since I have seen your family. What I have learned is your sister, wife, mother was an incredible women. Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you all. May all your memories of St. Justin's, Granby St. Tower Ave. and Canaan St. bring a smile to your hearts.
Kathy O'Brien Fawcett, Newington
Sheila Greenstein
September 14, 2009
To Gail's loved ones:
I count myself blessed to be among those who consider Gail a mentor. I met Gail in 1988 and for the next 10+ years, I was honored to learn from her as I managed the Sexual Assault Crisis program in Meriden. I will always be grateful personally for the wisdom she shared, but more for her vision for survivors and for our society as a whole. I will never forget her.
Maureen Kalafut
September 13, 2009
In my lifetime I have never had to spend a day without Gail,until a week ago. I do not like how it feels, I keep waiting for her call. Gail I love you and please know you will always be in my life. Thank you for always being there for me and taking care of all of us. I wish we had had the chance to take care of you. I WILL love YOU forever and miss you LOVE, Maureen
Kennen Smith
September 12, 2009
My brain was scrambled eggs at the funeral and I forgot to say that my best memory of Aunt Gail was almost three years ago when my Dad was in his final days from bile duct cancer. My family and I couldn't think straight as we watched my father slowly suffer. Like an angel on earth, Gail (and Uncle Tom) were there to support us and help us with my father as his health deteriorated. My Aunt Gail always knew what to do and how, from tending to my dad, preparing us for the inevitable and just holding our hands with love and support. Gail was our EVERYTHING and always knew when to give us a hug, or just as important, a kick in the butt to tell us to start living our lives again.
I remember the day I heard Gail had passed away I was in shock. I thought that this was a mistake. My family and I just saw her a couple of weeks back. How could the strongest woman I know have died so suddenly? Well, the only answer that I could come up with is this; my Aunt Gail was an angel on earth, and after a time on this planet, God calls his angels back to heaven when he feels their purpose on earth is fulfilled. When I was able to put my grief down for a moment, that idea made some sense to me. Angels on earth don't just live among us, they love us, they look after us, support us, inspire us, defend us, remind us of our personal worth and give us a sense of self-respect. They are the first to walk on the rough roads of life with a reassuring step that calls to others to follow. They are the champions of causes, the unyielding light that shines in the face of seemingly endless darkness and dispair at times. The light that says, "I can. I will. I can be and do anything."
On behalf of my wife Jacqueline and our babies Emma, Kennen, Sean and Abigail; We love you Gail! Thank you for being in our lives. We will miss you!
Kevin Lawlor
September 11, 2009
To Gail's family and friends, my deepest condolences and prayers are with you. May you be comforted in this difficult time knowing how many people she helped during her time with us. Her life was well spent speaking up for those with no voice.
Kevin Lawlor
Mary Keefe, MCADSV
September 10, 2009
To Gail's family from a friend in Michigan,
Thank you for sharing your beloved mother, wife, sister, aunt, and friend with the movement to end violence against women. Her brilliant career had such an impact across the nation. I appreciated her deeply as she served as mentor and teacher to me and so many in the movement. She was among the bravest and fiercest policy advocates in the world and her spirit will continue to inspire us as we carry on her important work. I just came home from the National Sexual Assault Conference, where so many of the speakers mentioned Gail and told stories of how she influenced them. It was beatiful to hear Lynn Rosenthal, special advisor to the White House on Violence Against Women remember Gail and quote her signature line, "in peace and success in ending violence against women." What powerful words as we look toward the future and commit to carrying on her amazing legacy.
I will be holding you all in my thoughts and prayers.
Dick and Judy Johns
September 10, 2009
As the days and weeks pass, and as you return to life's routine, may you continue to feel comforted by the love and support of family and friends.
Connie Merritt
September 10, 2009
Dear Tom,
Although I didn't know Gail other than a wave and a smile I will remember your enjoyment in relaxing together on the lawn of your beautiful cottage at OLS. You and your family will remain in my prayers. May your unbearable loss be somehow softened by the 40+ years of memories you have shared with Gail.
My deepest sympathy Tom,
Connie Merritt
Sandra Tullius
September 10, 2009
To Gail's loving family,
It was with shock and sadness that I learned of Gail's passing. I have known Gail throughout most of my professional career. We do not often have a chance to reflect on how a person touches our life and it is sad that we do so upon their passing from us instead of telling them in person. As a prosecutor for 20 years with the State of Connecticut Gail and I spent many hours training, writing and just talking about sexual assault and life in general. We shared the woes of the criminal justice system and its treatment of sexual assault and child abuse victims. Through this we became friends. We did not always see eye to eye but Gail was a great person to debate issues with! I learned so much from her and it truly made me a better prosecutor and teacher. I have now moved to a new position with the US Army where I am training and assisting their JAG prosecutors with sexual assault and child abuse cases. I know I would not be here today without what I learned from Gail. I hope I can pass on to these young prosecutors what she taught me- to try these cases passionately, to really listen to the survivors of these horrific crimes and to treat each person with dignity and respect regardless of their personal story. I will miss her friendship, her guidance and her passion. I am proud to have had Gail in my life as a mentor and as a dear friend.
Sandra Tullius
HQE
US ARMY-TCAP
Gail and Tom celebrating thier anniversary in 2008
September 9, 2009
Gail at home in Old Lyme
September 9, 2009
Beth Barnhill
September 9, 2009
Tom, Kerry, David and Gail's other family and friends,
Gail was a good friend, mentor, and colleague in many years of work to end sexual violence. She is being remembered in many talks and conversations as many of those of us working to end sexual violence are gathered in Alexandria, VA this week. Her work is evident in more public policy issues, legislation and intiatives than could adequately be listed here. Policy makers, colleagues, those who regard her as mentor and friend are speaking of all the good work she accomplished, and the influence she had. Her work was heartfelt, smart, and made a difference in the lives of many people she never met.
She loved all of you, spoke of you often in her many travels and work around the country. Thank you for supporting her and sharing her time with the rest of us.
She is already sorely missed. I will be thinking of all of you,
With sadness and good memories,
Beth Barnhill
Director, Iowa Coalition Against Sexual Assault;
Secretary, National Alliance to End Sexual Violence
Sheila Smedick
September 9, 2009
Dear Tom and Family,
I was so very sorry to learn about Gail. I recall all the fun and good times we had way back when. Time does not erase the friends that you have had. May you find comfort in the wonderful memories that you have of her and of the kind of person that she was.
Sheila Smedick
Joyce Wood
September 9, 2009
To Gail's Family: My daughter was raped 16 years ago and my family never would have survived without the advice and support of Gail. She later encouraged me to join the Victim/Survivor Advisory Council and I have been a member since its inception. She was truly a pioneer and leader in this battle that we fight daily and I was honored to have known her and worked with her. Joyce Wood (Niantic, CT)
Marcy Carlone
September 9, 2009
To Gail's Family, as well as friends,
Having had the great opportunity to work for and beside Gail, and having had the chance to get to know her both as a professional and personally, I share with you in the pain and sorrow of her loss. A true advocate and leader in the fight for victims/survivors of sexual assault, for women who were unable to use their own voice, Gail stood tall and proud knowing she was able to be that voice and that presence to so many. When I think of the phrase, "Gentle Giant" I think of Gail - for she was and forever will be a Gentle Giant... I thank her for all she has done on behalf of survivors of sexual assault in CT, as well as throughout our country. Her loyalty and committment to this cause was also reflected in her loyalty and committment to her family and friends... Rest in Peace Gail. With Love and Deep Sympathy, Marcy Carlone
Gail on Cruise to New Zealand 2/25/08
September 9, 2009
Cheryl St. Martin-Lyman
September 8, 2009
I remember how wonderful and gracious your mom was to me all the times I spent at your house. I am so sorry for your loss...Cheryl St.Martin-Lyman.
Ann Tuller
September 8, 2009
Tom and Kerry and David,
I so remember your wife/mother when Kerry and David were in school in Vernon with our children. She was a lovely person. I also had occasion to work with your wife/mother in our respective professional lives of trying to make the world a safer place for children and women victims of sexual assault. I was saddened to hear of your wife/mother's death. With deepest sympathy,Ann Tuller
Lucy Schnabel
September 8, 2009
To Tom, Kerry. David and all who knew and loved her,
Gail was a loving daughter, supportive sister, caring nurse, cherished wife, devoted mother, doting grandmother, purposeful mentor, intelligent thinker, fun loving aunt, zealous advocate, politically passionate, fervent supporter of womens' issues, generous teacher, wise counsel, warm neighbor and my dearest, dearest friend. The depth to which she will be missed is unfathomable. Our lives are better for having known her and our heart ache inconsolable at her passing.
May each passing day bring a little more healing to our hearts.
I will miss you dearly my friend.
September 8, 2009
To the Burns-Smith family:
Please know that I share your loss during this difficult time. I started this work about 25 years ago and know of Gail's remarkable work. Our paths have crossed many times as we've shared the same journey to eradicate sexual violence over those 25 years. With loving thoughts and prayers.
-Bonnie Clairmont
Tribal Law & Policy Institute
Mike Lawlor
September 8, 2009
Gail was a great woman who made countless contributions in the fight for justice for victims of crime and for making our criminal justice system work. She was a great friend and trusted adviser. I will miss her, but I will always be inspired by the many lessons she taught me over the years.
Kristen Roe
September 8, 2009
I had the privilege of working with Gail when I was employed by the US Department of Justice, Office on Violence Against Women and later as a consultant with the National Alliance to End Sexual Violence. Her leadership was so inspiring. I will not soon forget her dedication to the field of sexual violence and for all the lessons she shared with me as I began my career in the field she gave so much of herself to. Rest in peace, Gail.
Edward & Lucy Schnabel
September 8, 2009
Burns-Smith Families,
Words can't say the grief and sorrow I feel with the hearing of Gail's passing. The friendship and love our families shared goes back to our Tower Ave. days to our last e-mail last week. We have traveled the globe together sharing many memories and joys. From the NY Worlds Fair in 1964 to Australia in 2008, we could pick up from the last time we enjoyed each others company. I will cherish my visit with you in May forever.
May God comfort you in this trying time.
Your best friend,
Leona Mae Page
September 8, 2009
Gail has been my hero and mentor since 1995. I am deeply grateful for all she has brought to so many lives scarred by sexual violence - including mine. I will continue to reach for her spirit when mine gets tired.
September 8, 2009
To the Burns-Smith Family,
Words cannot begin to express how shocked and saddened I am by the news of Gail's passing. She was my hero as I began my career in Victim Advocacy as a young twenty something many years ago. She taught me and many others about working with victims, systems, politicians as well as learning about myself. And always with a smile and great sense of humor. Gail was a significant influence in building the foundation of the woman I am today. I will never forget her and everything she has done for me and so many others. She will be greatly missed.
With my greatest sympathy,
Carrie Wilhelm and Famly
Betty DeLuca-Blazawski
September 8, 2009
To the Burns/Smith Families,
Our thoughts and prayers are with you all at this sad time. We were so sorry to hear about Gail's passing. May all the fond memories you hold in your hearts help you through this rough time.
The Ray DeLuca Family
September 8, 2009
Tom,Kerry and David
I am so sorry to hear of Gail's passing. I know we have not been a part of each others lives for a long time but I remember with great fondness the years that we did have together. Losing a loved one is very hard. Our thoughts and prayers will be with you. Pat and Jack Godfrey
Garry and Kathleen (Smedick) Libby
September 8, 2009
Dear Tom and Family:
Words are so hard to write. Gail was a very special person. Her kindness and sympathy were apparent even as a teenager. We have such great memories of you both with my brothes and families and all the friends at 10 Graham and 15 Mohawk. You are all in our thoughts and prayers.
God bless,
Angela Moore
September 8, 2009
Dear Smith Family,
I had the privilege of knowing Gail through her pioneering and critical work to eradicate sexual violence. She was such a wonderful advocate for girls and women throughout the country. I learned so much from her.
I truly am sorry for your loss. Gail will be sorely missed.
Your family will be in my prayers.
My deepest condolescences.
Angela Moore
Department of Justice
National Institute of Justice
Paula Mclduff
September 8, 2009
My thoughts and prayers are with the Burns-Smith family. She was always a very caring person and has done alot to help others... you were very blessed to have her in your lives..
Tim Smedick
September 8, 2009
Tom, Kerry and David
My deepest sympathies. I remember Gail's great smile and laugh. And her dedication to a cause.
September 8, 2009
Tom and family -- Gail was one of the "special" people we met at Old Lyme Shores. She was a warm and kind person who always had a smile for everyone she met. We are so saddened to hear of her passing. May God comfort you all.
Carl & Pat Rohrbach
Arleen & Mark Desmond
September 8, 2009
Tom,
There are no words that can relieve the pain and grief that the death of Gail brings. Our thoughts are with you during this time of sorrow.
Susan Johnson
September 8, 2009
Dear Tom, Kerry and David,
I am terribly saddened by the passing of Gail. She was an incredible person doing so many good things for people that often cannot use their voice to fight for their needs. You are all in my thoughts as you move through this terrible time of grief.
I worked with Gail at CONNSACS and then became a neighbor at the beach. There is nothing to make this easier, please know that you have many , many people that hold you all in our thoughts and prayers!
With our deepest Sympathy,
Susan Johnson and family
Brian Schnabel
September 8, 2009
Tom, Kerry, and David I was shocked to learn of the loss of Gail this weekend. Since your family has been part of my life from before my birth you have all felt like part of my family. From trips to Old Frontier Land, Lake Champlain, boat rides on Long Island Sound, Bolton Lake day trips, Rome, Venice, Hawaii and Mexico all these trip were with Tom and Gail. We grew up together and your mother taught me so much it's hard to explain.
Gail was an incredible person and she will never be forgotten.
Brian Schnabel
June LeClair
September 8, 2009
Tom & Family,
I am so shocked and saddened to read of Gail's passing. We were both classmates and good friends at Yale-New Haven. Gail was very supportive to me during some tough times when my husband was in Viet Nam. I will keep you all in my prayers and will spend this sad day reflecting on some very happy, funny, and precious memories of days gone by...
June Burlingham LeClair
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