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Daniel Gute Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for Daniel Gute
Mary Jo Shapiro
August 9, 2010
Dear Mary, Ned, and family,
Please know my thoughts and prayers are with you and your loved ones in the loss of Mr. and Mrs. Gute. You all are being remembered in my prayers. Very sincerely,
David Kluge
August 2, 2010
Dear Mary and family,
My thoughts and prayers are with you in your time of grief. What a great life your parents shared and they will be together always. May your memories bring you great comfort.
Diane McGrath
August 1, 2010
I too am compelled to make an entry to this guest book even though I do not know your family. I share the same feelings as Paula Rein who made a July 24th entry. Thank you for making your parent's choice known to the public, I can't imagine the strength and courage involved, however, I strongly support your parent's right to do so. I recently lost my father to Alzheimer's and know the challenges a family faces when a loved one has a terminal disease. Your parents were obviously very wonderful people and it's apparent they will be sorely missed. I'm very sorry I never had the chance to meet them as I can tell I would have truly admired them. Thank you for your heartfelt generosity in sharing their final wishes with the rest of us.
July 27, 2010
July 27
Dear Mary, Connie, and Susie,
Our lives have been intertwined with Kitty and Dan's it seems forever: as partners and opponents on tennis courts and golf courses in Milwaukee and Tucson; as gossiping parents while you kids spent your childhoods at Milwaukee Country Club and University School and later as you had your romances, marriages, and children; as friends and neighbors who volunteered together and walked our dogs together.
Kitty had a huge impact on Liz's adult life. She took a class Kitty taught on leadership/communication for the Junior League of Milwaukee, which they later taught together. That influenced Liz's way of viewing every subsequent volunteer and board job, even how her family could interact better. And Dan was a huge help and comfort to Roger (and many others) as he faced significant health challenges. We admired your parents' determination keep on learning together through classes on music and history (your Dad wanting more from life than golf in his retirement) And we admire their final life choice which has challenged all of us to think beyond how we live to how we want to die.
We will miss and remember Kitty and Dan. Our lives are better for knowing them.
With affection for you all, Liz and Roger
Susan Haessler
July 26, 2010
Hi Mary, Susie, and Connie,
I have wonderful, fond memories of your whole family! "Gute's Farm" for Easter and Thanksgiving and tearing it up with the Terra-tiger! I even remember the desserts from "Grandma Pie" and "Grandma Bubble Gum"! (What wonderful memories). Your parents took my Mom out to dinner last year (accompanied by me, my husband and my sister Carolyn). We had a wonderful time reminiscing. Your parents will be dearly missed!
Love,
Susan (Woody) Haessler
Danny
Mary Witte
July 26, 2010
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Liza Tuttle
July 26, 2010
Dear Mary and Ned (and Susie and Connie),
Your mom and dad were wonderful people; I loved them dearly. I treasure the memories: From the Bahamas, to Kiel, to dinners at Blueberry Road, to Christmas eves at your house. I always looked so forward to seeing them.
I'm sorry that you no longer have them in your life, but I know you'll have plenty of conversations with them over the coming months. Almost a year after my mother's passing, I still talk to her in the mountains, in the car, in my kitchen. They're so much around, and they're so much more comfortable where they are.
Still, it's a shock and a huge loss and it will take lots of time to assimilate. I am standing there beside you, sending lots of love and courage. See you on August 7.
Kevin & Glynnis Cipollaro
July 26, 2010
Dear Mary, Connie and Susan,
It's hard to imagine two such resplendent soaring spirits not nearby. I cherish my memories of time spent with both¦they always made me feel welcome at their vacation spot in lovely Great Exuma, where Danny would infuse such unbridled excitement at the prospect of teaching me how to Windsurf. I spent hours trying to stay on the board in stormy weather just so that I wouldn't disappoint the character on the beach who was waving me on with such fervor and when I finally straggled in he greeted me by throwing an arm around me saying, "boy you sure do have persistence in your make-up, didn't you see me waving you in on account of the bad weather?"
And Kitty who like Mom spoke her mind with a truly unique mix of conviction and warmth, delivered through twinkling eyes that emoted such strength and compassion and yet always with a residue of merriment. Often when she would dispense uncannily prescient yet tough observations about a questionable choice I was planning to make, and then would end the conversation with a generous helping of humor. Once, after such a moment, and knowing my penchant for cooking, she challenged me to make a better key lime pie than the untouchable Great Exuma cook extraordinaire Nola. And so during their next visit to our home in Old Greenwich, after much fanfare about the dramatic process of making what I believed to be the worlds greatest key lime pie, and after watching Kitty dig voraciously into a slice, I leaned forward with great expectation, Kitty said, "This is really good!" And just before taking another bite and as my head was swelling to unhealthy proportions, added with a slowly surfacing grin, "I haven't had a lemon pie in ages."
I'll miss the laughter, warmth and thoughtful conversation on any subject we cared to cover. I can see them as if they were standing here and if they were I'd draw them to me, hugging both tightly would tell them that I love them¦very much and that when next they run into Mom and Scoop to say hi. God bless them!
Kevin Cipollaro (Bearsville, NY)
Carolyn Buckley
July 25, 2010
I remember wonderful times with the Gutes. Drinking spring water in their woods, playing all day with Connie, and we can't forget Das and Tiffany playing all day as well. Most importantly, my parents and Mrs. and Dr. Gute loving each others company.
We all were lucky to have been able to spend such special times with them and all of you. My mother is sad but respects there decision. She wanted me to make sure to tell you she loves all of you and is thinking of you. She will miss them.
Melissa Bozesky
July 25, 2010
Dear Mary, Ned and boys, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I was just thinking of Dr. and Mrs. Gute last week. I always remember them as best friends. Your parents truly seemed to enjoy each other. I am praying for you because loss is difficult and you miss them in your daily life. Take good care and know I am thinking of you and your boys.
Love
Melissa (chambee)
paula rein
July 24, 2010
While I do not know your family, the article in the paper yesterday and reading the entries to the guest book today suggested to me to write in the guest book as an unknown reader and writer to share what your story meant to me. The absolute courage that it took to take care of one another until the end was so very inspiring,there is no better love than that. I don't know that I would be able to have that courage for myself or my loved one. Thank you for putting your parents in the spot light for all of us to read about. I know they must have been wonderful people to all in life. Blessed thoughts to all of you, warmly Paula in Wisconsin Rapids.
Mary Gute Witte
July 24, 2010
Dearest all who have written,
My parents would have been so pleased at the sincere outpouring of love to them and all of their children and grands. Love and peace to you all.
Mary and Ned Witte
July 24, 2010
Bless you both for this act of love for your family. And thank you for carrying it out with dignity and planning. My heart soars with the thought that someday it will really be a supported choice, because of the courage you both had. Sincerely, Eileen Ostrowsky
Carolyn Weigell Maples
July 23, 2010
Dear Gute Family,
The decibel level rose at my parents' parties whenever Danny and Kitty showed up, and that was before anyone had finished their first cocktail! Their good cheer and genuine love and friendship, along with their intelligence and dedication to community causes, placed them solidly among my parents' favorite friends. No doubt the Gutes were greeted with open arms and laughter at the pearly gates, with Milwaukee deutsch being spoken.
The statement they have made with their deaths is one that should and must provoke public discourse. I applaud their courage. You have much to be proud of in your parents!
July 23, 2010
Sending you prayers for comfort and peace during this sad time.
So sorry that your time of grief has become public domain. May God grant you pockets of peace in the flurry of comments and opinions in the community.
My regret is that as a community we were also not a bigger part of their very painful journey this past year. But today I have been reminded of the emotional distress and I plan to visit our local nursing home with roses.
Thankyou Dr. Gute for being a healer. Thankyou Dr. & Mrs Gute for leaving fingerprints of love in our world. Until we meet again, bon voyage.
Member of the Journal Sentinel community
Denise Waddell
July 23, 2010
Dear Gutes, I golfed with Kitty for many years at TCC. I was always delighted to find that I was in Kitty's group as I knew it would be good golf and good fun. One time, she told me the story of how she and Dan met. I do not remember the whole story, but I do remember that she said she knew she would be with him always. And she is. Denise Waddell, Tucson
Jack Van Schoyck
July 23, 2010
I met Dan and Kitty at the Tucson Country Club. Dan and I would play golf with the "over the hill gang". It was a pleasure being with Dan. He had a great disposition. His interests were far reaching. We would discus world conflicts, politics, history, current events, and yes even golf. He had strong opinions, and he let you know them.
His love for Kitty was undeniable. He was devoted to her. I am saddened that I will not see them again. However, my thoughts are filled with wonderful memories of them together enjoying the moment and each other.
July 23, 2010
Rest in Peace
July 22, 2010
I was a classmate of Kitty"s at Smith and I cannot believe that the vivacious, loving, snling Kitty is no longer with us. I will miss her, and I will pray for her and her family. With sorrow and love, Jan Meagher
Nancy & Bill Carpenter
July 22, 2010
We were so sorry to hear of the passing of Danny and Kitty. They were fine, dedicated people and we will miss them. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Nancy and Bill Carpenter
July 22, 2010
We loved our days of golf with Dan and Kitty. And we respect their decision, however difficult for your families. We send our love.
Barb and Dick Wenninger, Gypsum, Colorado
July 22, 2010
I played golf with Kitty at TCC for many years. I did not know Dan. Kitty was such a great gal and I will miss her sweetness and humor. All who knew her are so blessed to have had her in our lives. My thoughts and prayers are with all of you. Leslie Cochran(Tucson)
July 22, 2010
This is the most heart wrenching and romantic real life story that I have learned of in quite some time. I deeply respect Danny and Kitty's choice. We are all here for you, Connie.
With much love,
Patty and George (and all of Beverly Road)
July 22, 2010
Dear Mary and family,
What a beautiful tribue you wrote to your parents. As I read about Danny and Kitty, I was struck by their passionate interests, accomplishments, zest for life and for each other. My thoughts are with you and your family. May your parents be at peace together.
Heidi Pohlmann Burmeister
Former classmate of Mary Gute Witte at USM
amy reardon
July 22, 2010
May they both rest in peace. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
~Amy Braeger Reardon and family
Gail Siegel
July 22, 2010
Condolences to their family & friends.
May they both rest in peace in each other's arms for eternity.
Dan and Kitty at Joey Rogers baptism in 2004
Susie Gute Rogers
July 22, 2010
July 22, 2010
Thank you family for writing a beautiful obituary when we know your hearts are filled with sadness. Our last memory of Kitty and Dan is sitting at the "big round table" in the men's grill at Tucson Country Club surrounded by their children and grandchildren. They were "beaming" as usual and introduced us to all. Kitty was the best and most gracious golfer I have ever played with and competed against. She was steady, consistent, calm, cool and deadly with her putter! When it was difficult for her to play with the 18 holers, she came to the 9 holers and she walked alongside her Caddy (Ham) almost to the end. How lucky for us to have her jump right in and offer to help out. She was the 9 Hole Club Champion in her last season against some much much younger and talented golfers. The photo you chose for the obit portrays them perfectly -- always a smiling and genuinely happy couple. We extend our love and blessings to the family. Jack and Candace Van Schoyck - Tucson, AZ
Jody Harrison
July 22, 2010
Susie and family,
Your parent’s commitment and wanting to take the journey together is admired. Not many people will experience this type of love. In my heart and prayers.
Gwyn Goy
July 22, 2010
To the entire Gute family,
Be strong through the turmoil that is sure to hit you from all angles in the days and months to come. So many people are touched and stunned by this courageous act, and will surely voice an opinion. Only you know the love that was shared between Dan and Kitty, and amongst yourselves. Having just had my Mother pass away, I feel for you when the empty chairs, the missed hugs, and the lack of the loving presence that your parents gave freely to the people around them seems unbearable to you. Of course you all have been imbued with their souls; it is now your job to keep them alive in spirit!
Winaki,
The Goy Family
Peter, Gwyn, Perry, Lydia, Robinson, and Elaina
Deb Anderson
July 22, 2010
Dearest Susie, I am sitting here reading the entries truly wishing I had known Daniel and Kitty better. What wonderful people they were and I now realize where you get your big personality and great qualities from.
When we lose someone we love, it seems that time stands still.
I am here for you always,
TL
July 22, 2010
May they rest eternally together in peace.
Lainie
July 22, 2010
Mary and Ned: My thoughts and tears are with you. I adored Kitty and Danny. From the golf course to the farm, I have so many wonderful memories. They were beautiful people inside and out. Their senses of humor, honesty, and kindness were special. They will be missed by all who knew them.
July 22, 2010
Girls,
I want you to know how much I think of you and your parents. During the time I spent with all of you in the early 70's I learned so much about how to have a loving family. Your parents taught me how to live life to the fullest. I remember going to the farm and learning about birds and flowers and just having fun in a relaxing way.I know that my sons have learned many things from my experiences with all of you. Your parents have always been truthful with you and that is a blessing. Keep there love alive!
My prayers and thoughts go out to all of you,
Cheryl (DeLorme) Sella
Marie
July 21, 2010
I did not know your parents. My dad lived 9 unhappy years without my mom. I am sure they would have preferred to do it the way your parents did. May you have peace knowing your parents did what was best for them.
My condolences for your loss.
teri vanert
July 21, 2010
god bless your mom and dad.may perpetual lght shine upon them,teri van ert west allis
Bruce Brewer
July 21, 2010
When I was in my early teens, I mowed Dr. and Mrs. Gute's lawn on Shore Drive. This was in the late 1960's. We became friends. One day, while walking with her (and their dog, Freida), Mrs. Gute told me: "I am so lucky. I am deeply in love with a man who is deeply in love with me." I think that she was pregnant with Connie at the time. That moment has remained clear in my memory for 40 years.
I remember one day, she lyrically sang/chanted:
"Mary Gute! Susie Gute! Connie Gute!"
Then she turned to me with this huge smile. She was so happy to have such wonderful girls. Also, I think she was quite pleased with herself for having given birth to such cute babies.
They owned a poodle, which they named, "Das." as in "Das Gute."
That was probably Dr. Gute's idea.
I was at college when they moved away, but before they left, I drank a bottle of champagne with them. We said goodbye. 40 years ago.
Terri Kahn
July 21, 2010
I met this wonderful family while I was working at Milwaukee Country Club many years ago. I was able to enjoy the love they shared and actually was thinking of them this week.
How strange the world turns.
They were a wonderful and loving couple and my thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Ham Boynton
July 21, 2010
Dr.and Kitty Gute what a pair.I knew Kitty the best out of the two,just because I was her caddie for the last 5 years,at Tucson C.C.I do have to say she went out in typical Kitty fashion.She won the 9 hole club championship in her flight this year.She looked like a little old grandmother,but let me tell you this.That lady swore,(only loud enough for me to hear),periodicaly throughout the round of golf when she demed it necessary.If you played her in a match play event,good luck.She was a fierce competitor,and used an 8 iron around the greens like nobody else.It was very hard to see someone you love and care deeply for go down hill slowly.But in typical Kitty fashion she just played the cards she was delt throughout her life the best she could,and she did it without complaining.Every time she would hit a good shot,(which was alot),she always said,"ah Kitty Tobin of yesturyear."She loved when I smoked one of my two cigaretts for a loop,because it reminded her of her mother,and would say,"oh mothers here."I could go on and on,and I don't mean to leave out the Good Dr.(thats what I called him),I knew Kitty better.What I did know of him,I liked and respected him and his opinions.I'm hoping he did get the gap wedge out of his bag.He never hit it well but thought he did.Good man thats for sure.Well Kitty play well,play smart up there.You'll hear my voice as I will hear yours.What a great competitor,golfer,and just a great human being.I know my life is better from having the Gutes in it.Kitty you were the best.Thank you for making me a better caddie,and person.You will be missed deeply by this caddie.Hambones Kittys caddie,caddie fore life.PEACE
July 21, 2010
Mary and family,
My thoughts and prayers are with you during this time of loss. When my parents passed, I celebrated their life and I'm certain your life will continue to be a wonderful celebration of your parents. Take care and I'm here.
Mary Hoehne
Beth
July 21, 2010
I did not know Dan and Kitty, but after reading their death notice and the tributes on here, I sure wish I had known them!! I am a Christian, but I also believe in the right to die with dignity. My sympathies to the Gute family - sounds like you had wonderful parents/grandparents. I wish you peace.
Sarah Witte
July 21, 2010
So much respect and awe. They showed not only courage but faith and love.
Mary, Ned, everyone, we're holding you tight as you let go, knowing that the ripples of their lives will go on and on.
Sarah Browne
July 21, 2010
Dearest cousins,
My parents, Jean and Bounce, have surely welcomed Danny and Kitty into Episcopal Heaven with great joy. I always admired them. Even more so now. Much love to all,
July 21, 2010
So many years, many of which (18) I lived overseas.......and yet no matter how many years pass and how far one travels, there are those that make an impact.....they broke the mould when they made Danny and Kitty.....may their love and kindness and smiles legacy live on forever and ever. I have been fortunate enough to... have known them and will take a a chapter out of their story for fun, love and kindness.
As a captain and a divemaster who has spent countless hours navigating by the stars and celebrating the marvels of the ocean, I send a wish to their children and granchildren to know that one never leaves, one only finds a place of peace in the stars and amidst the waves.
Make a wish on the stars and a hug in the ocean.
Danny and Kitty you are with us all forever. Your grace lives on.....
Heather Harnischfeger (Arlington, VA)
July 21, 2010
On behalf of everyone from Riveredge Nature Center please accept our deepest condolences. Kitty played a huge role in helping Riveredge become the place we are today and Dan and Kitty will always live on here.
We appreciate the family thinking of Riveredge and all money donated will go toward providing meaningful environmental education to people of all ages.
Patrick Boyle
Riveredge Executive Director
Mashie and Opah in 2005 with Rogers boys in MN
Susie Gute Rogers
July 21, 2010
Ned Rimer
July 21, 2010
Thinking about you all.
Lots of love, Ned
Paula
July 21, 2010
I am happy they were able to go on their own terms. I only wish we could provide this option to everyone. Thanks to Dan and Kitty and their daughters for being open about this matter, which hopefully will enlighten society about the dignity in allowing one to choose to die with as little pain and agony as possible. And I do believe in God.
July 21, 2010
Thinking about all of you. Lots of love, Ned Rimer
Susan LaBudde
July 21, 2010
Mary and family:
Our prayers and deepest sympathies. I remember happy times at "the farm", even on rainy weekends, and your mom's upbeat outlook and cheerfulness! My love and thoughts are with you.
Aalzheimer's Association of Southeastern Wisconsin
July 21, 2010
On behalf of everyone here at the Alzheimer's Association - thank you so much for thinking of us at this time of loss to your family. Memorial donations made in Daniel and Katherine's name will be put to use serving families and supporting research. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Tom Hlavacek, Executive Director
Sarah LaBudde Wolffe
July 21, 2010
I am saddened on my return to the UK (on 20 July) to read of the passing of Danny & Kitty. I am an old USM school friend Mary Gute Witte.
My memories of Danny and Kitty are that they were a fantastic couple; fun-loving, and with a highly developed sense of playfulness. They allowed Mary to host parties at their Cottage and were always generous, courteous and discrete hosts (exercising any parental oversight with a light touch). They were amazing parents and were also a sparky, vibrant couple. They will be sorely missed. Their best qualties will live on through their children. Love and condolences to family and friends. Sarah (LaBudde) Wolffe and family (James, David & Max). Edinburgh, Scotland
Peggy Hong
July 21, 2010
Mary, prayers and blessings to you and your family as you grieve the loss of your parents. My heart is with you.
July 21, 2010
Mary and family,
My thoughts and prayers are with you.You know where to find me I am always there for you all. Love Julie Trump
Nancy Daniels Middleton
July 21, 2010
The wonderful memories of my times with Kitty and Danny will live with me forever. I will miss them both very much and send my love and prayers to all those who have loved them as well.
Erica
July 21, 2010
What an inspiring love story! My sincere condolences to their family.
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