Preceded in Death Meaning

What does "Preceded in Death" mean?

At its core, "preceded in death" simply refers to those who have died before the person being honored. The phrase is commonly used in obituaries and funeral announcements and is used to spotlight important family connections or those who were close to the deceased.

For example, an obituary might note, "Beloved mother, preceded in death by her husband, Tom, leaves behind three children." Funeral announcements use this phrase for the same purpose as obits.

The phrase may also be used in contexts such as eulogies and genealogical records, albeit more rarely. When writing a eulogy, "preceded in death" can suggest that the deceased will have a reunion with previously lost loved ones in the afterlife, spotlight losses they experienced before death, or could simply place their death in the broader context of the family tree. A speaker might say, "She was a devoted wife, preceded in death by her beloved husband," to acknowledge the continuing bond between the departed.

The same holds true when creating a genealogical account or family history. The phrase helps clarify the sequence of deaths across generations, offering insight into the family's lineage and in doing so telling the story of the family’s ups and downs.

From a more philosophical standpoint, the term also offers a comforting reminder that, depending on your belief system, the deceased are rejoining those who went before them. It suggests a continuation of relationships beyond death, offering solace to the living in the face of loss.

If you need to write an obituary, you will likely be using some variation of this phrase.

Which begs the question: When it comes time to learn how to write an obituary, how should you create and structure a predeceased list?

Who to Include in a Predeceased List?

Deciding who to mention when noting those who already passed away has no one simple answer because every family is different. However, there are some common obituary traditions in North America that are usually followed. First and foremost is an emphasis on immediate family members, followed by others the deceased may have been close to.

Those most often mentioned in such a list, put here in priority order, include:

• Immediate Family Members – The core of the predeceased list usually features immediate family members such as parents, siblings, and children of the deceased – generally those with the closest familial ties and who were part of the direct lineage of the deceased.

• Extended Family Members – Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins – though not always mentioned, some or all of them may be appropriate if they had a meaningful relationship with the deceased.

• Close Friends and Mentors – More rarely included but not unheard of, depending on the deceased’s relationships and wishes, close friends, mentors, and other non-related individuals who played a significant role in their life may warrant a mention. This is not a typical approach, but remember that obituaries need not follow a strict set of rules, so if the departed would have wanted it, it’s worth considering.

In most cases, you won’t have trouble knowing who the most prominent people are to mention. However, it’s still worthwhile to run your list by other family members to ensure no one is inadvertently left out. This will spare you unnecessary drama during a difficult time.

Of course, you may run into a situation where difficult or fractured relationships have you wondering if you should mention an individual in an obituary, be it an ex-spouse, an estranged sibling, or other such situation. Family relationships can be complicated and, at times, messy. In the interest of maintaining low stress levels during a difficult time, we suggest being conservative when choosing to exclude immediate family from an obituary. A passing mention of them may shield you from unnecessary turmoil had you left them out.

Also keep in mind any cultural or religious norms regarding the order in which predeceased individuals are listed. In the United States, spouses typically take priority, followed by children, parents, and then siblings. However, this may not be universal, so consider if there are other means of accounting for “seniority” that should be taken into account.

Finally, remember to honor the wishes of the deceased (if known) or their immediate family. An obituary is deeply personal, and sensitivity to these preferences is encouraged.

Alternative to Saying Preceded in Death

Is “preceded in death” too dry for you? Do you prefer to be more creative in your tribute to a lost loved one?

Though variations of “preceded by” are most common, you are not bound to that phrasing. It’s fine to take another approach, whether for personal, religious, or poetic reasons. It may feel too impersonal to you; it may not carry the spiritual weight you’d like it to carry; or perhaps another turn-of-phrase sounds more pleasant or comforting to you.

Whatever the reason, here are just a few suggestions you might use. You can, of course, come up with your own as well. You are not bound by any obituary template and are free to get creative. Take note that in all cases, you may have to come up with some creative language to use in a way that replaces the simple and direct “preceded in death by.”

“Passed away after” – This common turn-of-phrase is easily understood and widely used.

"Was called home after" – For many, this phrase carries a spiritual connotation, suggesting that the deceased has been called to an afterlife or eternal home. It’s particularly suited to religious contexts or for individuals with a strong faith.

"Entered into rest after" – This phrase offers a gentle way of saying someone has passed away, emphasizing peace and restfulness. It’s especially appropriate in contexts where comfort and reassurance are desired, and is suitable both for religious and non-religious contexts.

"Found eternal peace alongside" – Similar to "entered into rest," this phrase suggests a transition to a state of peace and freedom from worldly struggles, though this variation has hints of spirituality to it, suggesting tranquility in the afterlife.

There are countless other options. Your only limit is your imagination. As long as you get the point across in a way others will understand and do so in a way that is respectful to those who are gone, you can phrase the sentiment in whatever way you wish when you place an obituary.

Examples of "Preceded in Death"

Would you like to see how this term is used in a real, genuine obituary? Here are several examples that provide a simple, concise and clear picture of how to use it effectively:

Stanley Dingus Obituary – This New Jersey man lost his wife several years prior to his death. In order to recognize this loss, his obituary writer took a simple and direct approach: “Stanley is predeceased by his wife Lois M. Dingus in 2019.” As you can see, the message need not be any more complex than this.

Earl Burton Obituary – At 95, this retired FDA executive outlived much of his family. As a result, his note is longer, though just as direct as the former example: “He was predeceased by his older brothers Phillip, Curtis, John, and Irving, and by his sisters Marion Jones, Barbara Leal, and Susan Davidson.”

Nancy (Shapiro) Frank Obituary – When honoring the life of this lively woman, her loved ones opted to take a non-traditional approach when discussing her deceased husband, Ron: “Nancy and Ron maintained a loving and supportive marriage of almost 55 years up until Ron's passing in 2015.”

As these examples showcase, both traditional and non-traditional approaches can be a suitable way to honor those who have passed before, putting their lives in the context of the life of the recently deceased.

It’s simple, and more importantly, it serves as a way to recognize everything that made a person who they were – including the loved ones they mourned in life.