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Barbara Bryant Havens

1956 - 2018

Barbara Bryant Havens obituary, 1956-2018, Columbus, OH

BORN

1956

DIED

2018

FUNERAL HOME

Schoedinger Northwest

1740 Zollinger Road

Columbus, Ohio

Barbara Havens Obituary

Havens, Barbara Bryant
1956 - 2018
Barbara Ann Bryant was born the youngest of three children to Dr. William Walter Bryant and Betty Bird Bryant on February 24, 1956. She spent her youngest years in Cambridge, Ohio where her father (and we should say very best friend) was a family doctor. She moved to Orange, Texas when she was 8 and quickly rose to fame due to her incredible long-distance running talents. This of course stirred feelings of jealousy in her older siblings, Bill and Cathy, but her charm was so overwhelming that they couldn't help but adore her. She graduated from High School early, and attended Texas Christian University where she met and subsequently fell in love with many men, but finally settled on a bespectacled boy from Upper Arlington, Ohio named Thomas Havens. What a pair they were. From New York to New Orleans, Pyongyang to Paris, they went everywhere and did everything with a cocktail in one hand and a cigarette in the other. Most importantly, they laughed & God did they laugh. The typical things followed: moves, marriage, and careers until one day she found herself pregnant. They moved back to Dallas and she gave birth to baby boy, John Franklin Havens II. There were slightly fewer cocktails, but just as many laughs. Before John was a year old they found themselves back in Columbus and Barbara was finally able to pursue her one true calling: being a mother. She was great at it. Four years later a daughter came, but much too early at only 25 weeks. The only day Barbara was not at the hospital caring and praying for her daughter, Parker Raine, was her son's 4th birthday, and she went back to the hospital after her son was asleep hugging his transformers. People often say that their children are their life, but few live it as completely and with as much joy as Barbara. She was a perennial room mother, and volunteer at Columbus School for Girls, and wherever her son was currently attending. She was a fixture. Oh, we almost forgot to mention: She. Was. Stunning. 5'10" with hair the color of an oak leaf in fall and legs for days! On the night of a fundraiser Tom and Barbara were hosting for Columbus Ballet Met at Villa Deshler, she stood at the top of the stairs and was so devastatingly gorgeous that Tom literally couldn't breathe! He passed out and was rushed to OSU hospital; to this day he hears a faint ringing in his left ear. Barbara was also a very early advocate for LGBT rights, and HIV/AIDS funding and research, having lost some very close friends to the disease and vowing to not let it happen to anyone else. It was a bit of a lofty goal, but she always was a touch dramatic. She loved old movies, The RED Party, David Bowie, reading, art in all of its forms and doing literally anything with her children. She loved her nieces and nephews, Bryant, Patti, Angie, Nathan and Billy, and drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes with her sister at the breakfast table while ordering useless crap off of QVC. She loved her friends Denny, Alex, Dru, Tom and a million others. She loved her mother Betty. She loved making people laugh and being made to laugh. Time passed and her children grew and went off to college, though Barbara and Parker still spoke daily. They mostly talked about John. Barbara continued to be active, with the help of her personal assistant of 20 years William Hubbard, in HRC Columbus, The Columbus Arts Council, Columbus School for Girls, The Aids Quilt Project and anyone, I mean literally anyone, who needed or asked for it. Barbara had a large vocabulary, but "no" was not included. In 2009, she got a chance to pursue her true calling once again with the birth of her first granddaughter, Isabeau Raine Havens, a redhead just like her! Two more would follow, Nola Jane and Willow Reed, and after a quick trip to the nearest phone booth Barbara became Super Nana! She so loved being back as CSG to pick up the girls from school and head to COSI or Bicentennial Park, or to attend Grandparents Day in red leather gloves and a fox fur throw. In 2014, her daughter and son-in-law Dean, adopted Sir Winston Churchill, a snarl-toothed Frenchie who was quite fond of rides on Nana's lap, and the family was complete. Again, so much laughter. Her passing was sudden and unexpected, but she took her last breathe surrounded by her children in peace, though we were disappointed at no last witty quip. Her father, big brother and Corbett Reynolds along with too many friends to name (you know we pay for this by the word, right?) were waiting with open arms on the other side as she finally got out of that damn wheel chair and retired to a Louis XIII style chaise lounge like the lady that she was. We love you Mom!! Service to be held at 11 am Saturday, February 10 at Schoedinger Northwest Chapel, 1740 Zollinger Road, Upper Arlington, Ohio 43221, with a cocktail reception at M Restaurant to follow from 1-3pm. In lieu of flowers, Barbara has requested donations to the Columbus School for Girls Scholarship Fund. Gifts in her memory can be made online at www.columbusschoolforgirls.org/giving/give-now or by mail to Columbus School for Girls Department of Development, 65 S. Drexel Avenue, Columbus, Ohio 43209. Please visit www.schoedinger.com to share memories and condolences.

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by The Columbus Dispatch from Feb. 6 to Feb. 9, 2018.

Memories and Condolences
for Barbara Havens

Sponsored by The Columbus Dispatch.

Not sure what to say?





Roberta Hubbard

January 31, 2022

RIP Barb
1/31/22

James Kaelin

August 15, 2021

So much fun to be around. I was her neighbor at Deshler/S. 4th in German Village 25 years ago when she and Tom (and young John and Parker too of course) lived in that gorgeous Italianate mansion. Their door was always open for wine and smokey treats and laughs, anytime. In those days we were invincible. RIP beautiful spirit.

Roberta Hubbard

February 5, 2021

Still think of you often Barb, miss you

July 31, 2019

What a beautiful loving soul

Nikki Ortega

May 10, 2018

What an amazing and beautiful woman. How truly blessed you all were to have known her and had her in your lives. This obituary would have no doubt made her proud. May she RIP in paradise. God bless all of you in this difficult time. Remember if the Lord brings you to it, he will bring you through it. Just keep the faith.

Mattie

February 10, 2018

I did not know Mrs. Barbara Bryant Havens. However, after reading her obituary, I felt as if I had known her as a friend. I usually don't read obituaries. It was something about this one that just drew me in. I would like to give the family my condolences. The loss of a wife, mother, sister, daughter is always hard. Harder yet, is that she was a grandmother. Peace be unto you and may each one of you always feel the warmth of her memories. God bless you.

Marlene Stewart

February 10, 2018

The words, her door was always open, were coined for Barbara. I am so sorry for your loss. Barbara was a wonderful neighbor and I am fortunate to have known her. May her memory be a blessing to her children, grandchildren and many friends. You are so very loved, Barbara.

Lois Bartman

February 9, 2018

I've never seen so many messages. I didn't know Barbara. However, after listening to her obituary, I wish I had. That's what I call a beautiful obituary. I hope this starts people writing their own obit and making it as good as this one written for Barbara.

I feel your memories of such a special person, will help you through the tough times. Remember her with a smile on your face and a song in your heart.

A Stranger,

Lois

Jack and Marilyn Reinhardt

February 9, 2018

We send our deepest sympathy to Tom, John, and Parker and all her family. Barbara was a wonderful friend to our family, especially to our son John. Both of our sons became fast friends when they attended Columbus Academy. Our thoughts and prayers are with you!!!

West Coast Fam

February 9, 2018

John, Tom, Michaella, Beau, Nola, Willow and Auntie Parker too - we are sending you all our strength to bear this loss and remind you . . . "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you still remember dreaming?" That's where she loves you all from now. That's where she will be waiting.
All our love

February 8, 2018

Dear Parker,
My deepest condolences on the loss of your mom. I remember her coming to CSG to take you home and she was always helpful, joyful , and delightful. It was lovely getting to know her during your Lower School years.

Dear John,
I send my sympathies to you and your family during this difficult time. Your mom would always make the room shine when she arrived at CSG.

Thinking of you,
Linda Resch

February 8, 2018

Parker, I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I enjoyed my conversations with her - not only when you were in school but also in recent years when she would come to the cafeteria for lunch. Much love to you and your family.
-Pam(Dickman)Hartshorne

Judy Wright

February 8, 2018

Thom and Havens family, Dad used to talk about how wonderful Barbara was but I never realized how beautiful she was!, I know through it all you all remained close. I am sorry for your loss. A void exists.

Jonathan Spayde

February 8, 2018

Thank you Barbara for always having kind words mixed with your beautiful smiles, you told me one time that life is a fantastic journey, one to be exited about... now you are on the grand journey, God is with you, and God bless your sweet spirit, you are loved by so many. I love you and will miss you until the next time we have a cocktail.

AL & PAT JOHNSTON

February 8, 2018

Such sad news, but what a lovely tribute written for an absolutely outstanding woman. My heart goes out to all of Barb's family, and the great loss they are facing. God be with you all.

Kevin Thornhill

February 7, 2018

I am deeply saddened to hear about the loss of Barbara Havens. I will miss her smile. I will miss seeing her in Brian and John's salon when I got my hair cut. I will miss the time spent with her on the 4th of July celebrations at her condo downtown overlooking Bi-centennial park. That's for being such a great advocate for the Gay community. Thanks for being such an open, inviting and inclusive person. The family has my sincerest condolences during this difficult time sweetheart this difficult time.

Roberta Hubbard

February 7, 2018

Dear Havens Family
So sorry for the lost of a beautiful and loving woman, deepest sympathy and condolences to all. Barb was such a wonderful and interesting lady, she always treated me with respect and love, I will miss her spirit

The Rev deniray mueller

February 7, 2018

"Death is nothing at all. It does not count. I have only slipped away into the next room. Nothing has happened. Everything remains exactly as it was. I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by the old familiar name. Speak of me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference into your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. There is absolute and unbroken continuity. What is death but a negligible accident? Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner. All is well. Nothing is hurt, nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. How we shall laugh at the trouble of party when we meet again! Henry Scott Holland (27 January 1847-17 March 1918), Regius Professor of Divinity at the University of Oxford.

Patti Williamson

February 7, 2018

My deepest sympathy Thom, John and Parker

February 7, 2018

We are, indeed, saddened to learn of Barbara's passing. Having only met her a couple of years ago at Parker and Dean's wedding, she left a lasting impression on us, such a beautiful and kind person. In reading this obituary, if I didn't know whose it was, I could have guessed it would have been Barbara's, such a dynamic personality, as I recall.
Sincerest condolences and heartfelt sympathy to the entire family. She will be in our prayers, as will all family in this time of great sorrow.

Kelley Hutta

February 7, 2018

I have so many fun memories of Barb. I will never forget working with her on projects and graduation events for the CSG class of 2006. My favorite memory is of how much trouble we got in for Barb's hilarious party prop for a celebration for the girls in middle school. She brought whoopie cushions and we laughed and laughed over the unhealthy sounds coming from the Cinderella staircase. Not everyone shared our sense of humor! Barb was one of the most generous people I have ever met...with her time, brains or her resources. When the class of 2006 thinks back on how wonderful their time was at CSG, they can bet that Barb had a hand in it. She was universally loved and will be missed. My deepest sympathy to all who loved her.

Anne Santilli

February 7, 2018

Barbara was kind, generous and always fabulous. She will be missed. My condolences to all who loved her.

Christina Redman

February 7, 2018

I always appreciated Barb's kind heart. Even though I lost touch with Barb after our daughters graduated from CSG in 2006, I will always remember the fun times working on school projects together, especially the Junior Class prom fundraiser!

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Feb

10

Service

11:00 a.m.

Schoedinger Northwest

1740 Zollinger Road, Columbus, OH 43221

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1740 Zollinger Road, Columbus, OH 43221

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