Barbara Kopacki

RUTHERFORD -- Barbara Kopacki, 86, died May 16, 2024 after celebrating her final Mother’s Day week in the company of her loving children and grandchildren.

She is predeceased by her husband of 61 years, Stanley. She is survived by her four children, Matthew, Christine and Daniel Cahalane, Paul Kopacki and Sarah Sussen, Jane Kopacki and Patrick Manion; her five grandchildren Daniel Joseph (Mary Dena Apodaca), Jennifer (TK Cram), Samantha, Lukas and Benjamin; and her many cousins, nieces and nephews. Her dedicated caregivers, especially Emily Stupakova and Toni-Lynn Cospito, became family to us all and made it possible for her to stay in her own home with her cat Ginny until her death.

Growing up in Wallington as the only child of Joseph and Violet Stevens, Barbara loved to laugh, and to make others laugh; in her later years, she had a goal to make at least three people laugh every day, and she nearly always succeeded. Known to friends and family as Babs, she was a member of the first graduating class of Wallington High School. Proud daughter of an auto mechanic, she was a skillful driver who always had her own car, and equated it with independence. When infirmities made it impossible for her to drive in her last few years, and she missed that freedom acutely. 

Barbara and Stanley moved into their home in Rutherford in 1960, and she has been a fixture on their block through generations of neighbors.  Their home hosted neighborhood get togethers, late night discussions, and when their children grew older, annual post-canoe trip bbq parties. She was a past President of Rutherford Junior Women's Club.

She was a lifelong home economics teacher, receiving her bachelor's and master's degrees from Montclair State College in 1959 and 1974. She met her husband at her first job teaching in Kearny High School, and returned to teaching at Queen of Peace High School when her children went to school. She went on to teach typing (even darkening the classroom so her students learned without looking at the keyboard), driver’s education, computer skills, health and first aid. She was a CPR instructor and it was not uncommon to have Resusci Annie mannequins lying around the house. She finished her paid teaching career in the Irvington School District but continued educating others well into her last days. 

As a living model of home economics, she found ways to put her many talents to work bringing in some extra income for the family. She sewed Barbie doll clothes, cooked with her husband for Barstan Catering, sold her famous homemade potato bread at Kearny High School and served as a home test kitchen -- even being recruited to test the first Amana microwave at home with her own recipes. She was undaunted by any projects she could sew, making detailed curtains, duffel bags and slip covers. Her baking was legendary making coffee cake for the crowds on the mornings of the family canoe trip or birthday cheesecakes for her daughter’s best friend.

She was a proud emergency medical technician, volunteering on the Rutherford First-Aid Ambulance Squad for many years, and often choosing shifts where she could bring the ambulance to Memorial Field to stand by RHS track meets and games, especially if her children were playing. She and Stanley had cameo roles in the 1984 horror movie spoof The Toxic Avenger, when the film maker asked the Rutherford Ambulance Squad to appear in a scene responding to the carnage at a Mexican restaurant.

Barbara took a side EMT job at the Meadowlands where she responded to emergencies at a variety of events including Grateful Dead concerts, World Cup soccer and NFL football which gave her many great stories to tell. It had the side effect of turning Stanley into an unlikely sports fan just so he knew when she would be coming home after the games. She even played in an employee game of football on the 50-yard line in the stadium with her daughter.

A lifelong animal lover, she had many dogs and cats, and is survived by her loyal feline companion Ginny. She also loved the outdoors, maintaining a vibrant garden and enjoying time in the mountains whenever she could get there. She loved watching sunsets at Crandon Lake. She liked to swim, and was a strong supporter of the Rutherford High School pool.

Barbara was a helper and caregiver by nature, which made her a wonderful friend, spouse, mother, grandmother, teacher, and volunteer first aider who made a lasting impression on so many people across her life. 

A wake will be held Wednesday, May 22 from 4-8 pm at the Macagna-Diffily-Onorato Funeral Home, 41 Ames Ave, Rutherford, NJ. The funeral service will be held at 12pm Thursday, May 23 at Grace Episcopal Church, 128 W. Passaic Ave, Rutherford. Interment will follow at the Crest Haven Memorial Park in Clifton.

In lieu of flowers, please consider donations to the Rutherford First-Aid Ambulance Corps at RutherfordEMS.org. Please view her full obituary and share online memories or condolences at MacagnaDiffilyOnoratoFuneralHome.com.