John J. Goldner Sr.

John Goldner Obituary

(Asbury Park Press)

JOHN J. GOLDNER SR.
AGE: 66 MANAHAWKIN
John J. Goldner Sr., 66, of Manahawkin, Stafford, formerly of Union City, passed away Sunday morning, Nov. 2, at Deborah Heart & Lung Center, Browns Mills. Mr. Goldner was a highly decorated senior detective and arson investigator for the Union City Police Department with over 33 years of service, as well as an honorably discharged sergeant of the U.S. Army National Guard's Fighting 69th Infantry Regiment; 42nd Infantry Division.
Mr. Goldner is survived by his loving wife of 45 years, Marie Pietronico Goldner; his four children, John and his wife Laura, Nancy Battaglino and her husband Jeff, George and his wife Alicia; and youngest son, Joseph Goldner, as well as his pride and joy three grandsons and four granddaughters.
Mr. Goldner is also survived by three brothers and a sister, George, Eugene, Michael and Anne Zamparelli.
Viewing hours will be from 2 to 4 p.m. and 7 to 9 p.m. Thursday at Thos L. Shinn Funeral Home, 10 Hilliard Drive, Manahawkin. A Funeral Mass will be offered at 11 a.m. Friday at St. Mary of the Pines, Manahawkin, followed immediately by burial at St. Mary's Cemetery, Manahawkin. In lieu of flowers, the family has requested donations to be made in the name of John J. Goldner Sr. to Deborah Heart and Lung Center designated for (MICU), Browns Mills.

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Published by Asbury Park Press on Nov. 5, 2008.

Memories and Condolences
for John Goldner

Sponsored by The Goldner Family.

13 Entries

February 27, 2025

I went to visit you yesterday. Love and thinking about you always.

April 30, 2023

Not a day goes by that I don't think of you.

Not a 77 shows up in a phone number, license plate, address, receipt, lottery number or billboard that doesn't remind us of you - it's like a well timed grin or hug.

I tell the people more in my life then ever, how much I love them and they mean to me when I have the courage to - and I learned that from you.

I am still learning from you, even now.

I know you can see everything, and I hope it makes your heart happy and full while you wait for everyone to catch up.

November 23, 2020

You're so far away but so close at the same time.

I love you and miss you.

I hope you're proud of all of us because in the end no other reward is greater.

Joseph Goldner

November 2, 2018

Not one day in ten years has gone by where my Father hasn't been with me. I never stop missing his laugh, his bear hugs, vice-like handshakes or stories about growing up in Union City - but it doesn't stop me from remembering all of those things or wanting to be every bit the son, brother, uncle and father to family & the type of friend he was to so many.

January 13, 2014

Miss you much.

Andrew Battaglino

December 3, 2008

My Poppy expected great things from me. I'm Still trying to work them out at the moment. I only knew my poppy for 13 years Those were the best 13 years of my life, and when i found out the news i was balling my eyes out. This school year i had to write an essay about someone who has made an impact in my life and I chose my poppy

Andrew Battaglino

Dear Pop Pop,
School is going great. I’m glad to inform you that this year is one of my greatest. I also never forgot what you taught me about my grades, which are very important, and decide what colleges I might be able to attend. I also wanted to tell you what I’m planning to do in my last five years of school, and what I hope to do with my future which is finish all my years of middle school and high school, and join the police just like you and I hope I’m as good as you were before you retired. I want to make you proud that I’m your grandson and the middle grandkid. So poppy here’s to you I’ll never forget what you taught me about my marks in school. This is the person that has impacted me.
Love,
Andrew

I Hope to see you in the future poppy i'll miss u day and night. I was just very sad u couldnt make it to my birthday last month but i know you held in there as long as you could. Uncle geroge said to me the day you passes that now you can breath woth no problem or even run as far as you want without stoping.
and how now ur probly curseing at nicky to tell him to stop jumping on you. I love you poppy and "See You Later"

STEVE STEPHENS

November 25, 2008

I REMEMBER JOHN GOLDNER AS
1 ) A GOOD FAMILY MAN AND FRIEND
2) MY DETECTIVE PARTNER AND AN EXCELLENT POLICE OFFICER.
3) MAY HE REST IN PEACE KNOWING
I STLL GOT YOU BACK.

George Goldner

November 21, 2008

I have been wrestling with posting what I wrote and read for my dad's service, and seeing the other entries here - I wanted it be remembered for him here as well.

My Father
My father was John J Goldner Sr
He went by many names - Officer, Detective, John, Johnny, Johnny Shoes, Goldner, Dino and Poppy - just to name a few. The most important name he was to me was Da.

I didnt do things with my Da that other guys did with their fathers - we never watched sports; we never talked cars and we never played catch.

We watched John Wayne movies; we talked about building or fixing things; we talked about working and eating.

Other guys fathers taught them things like how to hit a ball or throw a pass.

My Da showed me how to shake hands like a man and how to fold a hankerchief.

My father taught me that when you give someone your word, you do whatever it took to keep it. My father never let me down any time he ever gave me his word.

He loved to break chops, and when I'm giving someone the business like I think he would and they say to me - you are your father's son, I feel as though I've gotten the best compliment in the world.

Growing Up
Growing up wasn't tough in our house unless you went against the house rules - you would be well aware of that happening by hearing my mother say something like "you wait until your father gets home" which would then be followed up with him getting home, him immediately hearing your misdeeds for the day and saying "I just walked in the door, I havent even sat down yet" - then it was tough.

We never feared our Da for the occasional love tap, yelling or chiding, we feared something far worse - dissappointing or letting him down - and their could be no greater motivator to succeed.

His biggest concerns for all of his children were good grades, good behavior and making good lives. He was proud of every single one of us, our spouses, and our children - his grandchildren - who were and always will be his pride and joy. He loved being Da, but he relished his being Poppy.

As Poppy he would constantly be bringing them little presents, making them their favorite cookies or hugging and squeezing them in his oak tree arms and steel grip hands never then these times was he warmer or gentler.

His Work
In his work as a policeman - he was a cop's cop. I stand here today in uniform because of the impression he and his work made on me growing up.

When I was a kid and we lived in North Bergen my favorite times were the summers when I was off from school and my father's pager would go off in the middle of the night for a fire call to investigate. I would get dressed and wait in the kitchen, I knew if I was up and ready - my chances of getting to go along were almost a guarantee and he'd say "leave a note for your mother".

I loved being a step or two in his shadow watching peoples’ eyes light up when they saw him and how they would hesitate to shake his hand because they knew shaking hands with him would almost break their own. I carried his toolbox and camera bag everywhere he went, and I would have carried it a million more nights if I had the chance. Everyone saw me and knew who my father was, but maybe didn’t know my name. As far as I was concerned, that identity alone was all I could have asked for.

His passion and energy and heart excelled his work beyond any measure. He earned Gold Records from music companies for anti-piracy cases that were landmark; he had one of the greatest decoration records in his department at the time of his retirement; and there was no better arson investigator in Hudson County - and this was all due to him being him, and doing things not just to do them, but to do them the best he could.

My Mom
In our family my father and mother made quite the couple. They were a pair that you could just not imagine apart. They were constant partners in crime - from their trips to Atlantic City - where I understand there is a Goldner chandelier in the lobby of Trump Plaza to their "free give-a-way" trophies which were never really free, that they would always proudly display and show off upon receiving. They did everything together - laughed, joked, yelled, screamed and argued - but all out of love, the kind you can only get after spending over 45 years together.
His love for my mother knew no limits - he'd buy jewelry, fur coats, flowers, candy or even a dog - without a blink or reservation. The phrase "Do you think your mother will like this?" far outweighed how much does it cost or where will we put this thing. If there was something he thought our mother wanted or deserved, or any of us for that matter - he found a way to buy it, because cost never mattered - for him, the worth was in watching any of us open those presents. He usually did his shopping at the last minute, we use to shop alot on Christmas Eve.

His tough and stern outsides had the warmest and most sentimental insides and they only expanded on in his later years.

My Father
My father was a true role model, a genuine hero, the ultimate example to follow and strive to be. No medal or ribbon I earned in the Army, no badge or patch I wear now and no award or accolade I earn in the future will ever be higher or more valuable to me then the times my Da put his arm around me, squeezed me in so tight I couldnt breathe - and whisperded in my ear "You always make me proud"

I think my father knew more then he led on the past few months. He would call our home every day and ask about the kids, tell me about product recalls, the news, the war, to be safe at work, to kiss Alicia and the babies, and that he loved me. I never took those calls for granted, and am happier and thankful now knowing that he wanted to make a point to me about his feelings and he did it through and through.

The pain in my heart for the loss of our father isn't anger at his leaving, it isnt sadness for his health at the end - it's the simple pang of missing him, his smile, his laugh, his charachter and his love.

The positive thought I keep in my mind - is that I know where he is now, and that he can breath without issue, he can walk without a problem, he can eat all the foods he loves without a concern of reprecussion - I know by now he's eaten at least 3 dozen eggs fried in bacon fat; miles of pepperoni and cheese; and so much fried corn beef hash its coming out his ears. He can see all the people he missed up above and relax without a worry in the world.

He raised his children well, and he knows we'll take care of our own like he taught us to - and we'll be alright.

My sister Nancy said something yesterday that we always said, and its something that has been keeping me going - this is not goodbye - its see you later - and some day, we will.

I love you Da and I could never thank you enough for everything you did for all of us. We'll see you later.

John

Frank H Caputo

November 20, 2008

This picture is how I will remember John (shoes, golf club, size 13 boot) the most. I had the honor to be appointed to the UCPD in Oct. 1963 along with John and Herbie Rodriguez right from the start we were a team we walked a beat together, went to the academy together and were assigned to Motorcycle Patrol together, for about four and a half years. John was always all Cop, I never had to worry about my back because John was always there to cover it. I am sure he will be one of God's Police Force. Thanks for being my friend.

Me and Dad on Christmas Eve

Nancy

November 10, 2008

I had been going back and forth whether I should post what I wrote for my Dad's service, and out of the blue today my Mom told me she wanted it on here...

I wanted to tell you all a few things about my Dad, I’m sure you’ll know some of them, but I wanted to tell you anyway.
Whenever I saw my Dad or talked to him on the phone, we never said goodbye, just see ya later. He always stopped in the middle of whatever he was doing to give us kids a life lesson. When he was rewiring an outlet at the house, he told us if we saw his hands go up in the air that we weren’t supposed to touch him till he fell on the floor and wasn’t moving anymore, cause we’d get electrocuted too. He told me if someone grabbed me from behind and put their arm around my neck to choke me, to turn my head to the side so I could still breathe and keep swinging till they let go. He told me if I was ever attacked not to yell rape, but to yell fire. People were more apt to get involved if they thought their property was getting damaged. Sometimes I think he told me those things so he could put off my dating for just a little bit longer. He told me that he had a distinct dislike for the sentence “I don’t want to get involved” and how much harder that made his job. He loved being a policeman ALMOST as much as being a Dad, and no matter what kind of crazy hours he worked, when he was home, he was really home. Making pancakes bigger than your head, mountains of popcorn eggs (which in fact, tasted nothing like popcorn and I am still not a fan) holiday dinners, barbecues at the house. He loved to entertain and he loved stuffing people full of food that he made himself from scratch.
He loved to build things and we always kidded him that if there were a nuclear blast all that would be left would be whatever he made and cockroaches. Much to his displeasure I tested out his building abilities when I was 7 or so and I decided to have a seat with my dolls some six feet in the air on shelves he put up in mine and John’s room. He came in the room and I thought, if I sit here real quiet, he won’t see me. Well he turned around and had a stunned look on his face, he was gonna yell but stifled it so I wouldn’t be startled and fall off. He reached up with his big man hands and took me down, I’m not gonna tell what happened after that, but I think you can guess.
Before we went out somewhere we inevitably got the “don’t make me have to talk to you while we’re out” speech. And if you were foolish enough to think that just because he didn’t say anything on the ride home, you figured you were free and clear. So we’d get home and he always unlocked the door and would let us all file in ahead and as you were passing him by the front door you’d get the “thought I forgot about that, didn’t ya?” flick to the back of the head.
When I was around 17, I had too much to drink at a party. When I got home, I proceeded to spend just about the entire night in the bathroom.
In the morning when I finally stopped heaving, I went downstairs to see my father in his usual position at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee. He said you better hurry up you’ll be late for work.
I said oh dad I can’t go to work today I’m sick. He looked me right in the face with that big Goldner grin of his and said “don’t do the crime, if you can’t do the time” and so I packed myself off to work that day, without protest because when he said something, he meant business. My parents were always strict with us and now as an adult I appreciate the value of what they taught us. He told us that we didn’t have to be the best at something, we just had to do our best. He always said he wanted us to do better than he did, but honestly I can’t think of how we would accomplish that. He’s left some very large shoes (both literally and figuratively) to fill. He and my Mom always made sure we knew where we came from, that we did have a responsibility to others. That you shouldn’t wait for someone to ask you for help, that you should get up and do it before they had to ask. That good manners were the rule, not the exception. That being silly is a good thing, and that teasing and kidding is always appropriate. If you cared about someone, you could do something nice for them and it didn’t have to be on a grand scale because it really was the thought that counts. Whether its sneaking off to the dollar store to buy me coca cola glasses or chatchkis, or hunting for yellow chick peeps for Easter just because he knew that I liked those best. He showed me that all the little things in life mean something. They all count, and I love him for every one of them. I’ll see you later Dad.

Love, your favorite daughter...

maureen Zamparelli/Connolly

November 5, 2008

To my aunt and cousins, Uncle John always had a heart of gold, he was tough, but sweet and caring....I will always cherish my moments of growing up and how he made me laugh,,,,,and our quiet talks....I was blessed to have this man in my life....He will be missed.....but will always be present....Maureen Zamparelli/Connolly...

Kris Franks

November 5, 2008

With my deepest sympathy
My thoughts and prayers are with your family at this sad time.
Sincerely,

Robert Borozny

November 5, 2008

My condolences to the Goldner family for their loss of a great man. To my friend George whom I've known since College, I know how much of an influence on your life he was and i know that know matter what you do in your life, he will always be proud of you, as am I.

Robert

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