RAE EDELSON

EDELSON, Rae Rae was a frank and unconventional person. She did not use euphemisms. This obituary will be in that spirit. Rae was born in Newark, NJ, February 9, 1943, to Fannie Temkin (Winokur) and Kalman Temkin, a Russian Jewish immigrant. Rae grew up in Hartford, CT. Rae loved her grandparents, Charles and Mary Winokur (Petrushka), Polish Jews who had owned a farm in Vernon, CT and read a political newspaper written in Yiddish. Rae's mother, Fannie, had three siblings, Meyer, Joe and Celia. Fannie worked for an insurance company. Rae's father was a painting contractor who spoke at least four languages and wrote a book about Alexander the Great. Rae (known as "Rae Ellen") was an excellent ice skater and performed jumps on a pond. She also sang and played piano. As a child of about nine, she played a game called "movie star" with a boy in the neighborhood, the game produced her first kiss. She had a dog named Smoky who she loved. As a teenager, Rae was a camp counselor, where she taught swimming. Campers called her "Rae-gun." Rae was accepted to Barnard, at a time when women did not attend Columbia. Rae loved Manhattan and majored in physics at Barnard. She felt different from her classmates, many of whom came from wealthy backgrounds. Rae remembered some of them would absently rap their diamond engagement rings against desks during classes. When she was still in college, Rae's boyfriend presented her with an ultimatum: "marry me or leave me." Rae reluctantly married, crossing her fingers behind her back during the wedding vows so "it wouldn't count." Rae graduated from Barnard in 1964 and lived in a number of cities, but was glad to return to NYC in the 1970s. By this time, she had two kids. She had several jobs, including working with children who had cerebral palsy and teaching special education at a university. Rae also began writing plays in a graduate program at Hunter College. Rae loved her time in NYC, where she knew a community of people associated with Rockefeller University. In 1977, Rae's husband brought the family to Boston. Within a year, she separated from her husband. This was a difficult time, she wanted to return to NYC but couldn't, she felt isolated in the suburbs and she needed a job. In 1978, she found a position as director of Gateway Crafts (now Gateway Arts) in Brookline. She would stay there 44 years, leading Gateway's growth from a small studio to a thriving program providing opportunities for adults with disabilities to make and sell their art. In 1982, Rae met Peter Gordon. When they first met, Peter said "if I talk to you for 15 minutes, I'll be with you for 15 years." He was right. They were together until 1998, when Peter died from ALS. Rae and Peter became joint parents to Rae's children, who loved him too. Over the years in Newton, Rae worked at Gateway, wrote plays that were produced on stage and raised her children. Although she was allergic to cats, she allowed the family to take in a neighborhood stray, Orange Cat, who they all loved. Orange Cat killed squirrels, who were a constant menace to the roof. Rae deeply loved swimming at Crystal Lake, where she performed a technique her kids called "the mommy breast stroke" (it involved keeping her head out of the water). In her plays, Rae filled in gaps in her family's history. In "Reparations", a main character was based on a cousin who survived Auschwitz. Another play, "Sophie Makes Good," centered on the lives of Jewish immigrants. Still another play, "Nothing Like This But This", described Peter's decline from ALS. A few years after Peter died, Rae met Bruce Dow, who became her partner for 17 years. Rae and Bruce had a remarkable overlap in their lives before they met, having lived in many of the same places and knowing some of the same people. Rae loved Bruce and loved their time together on Cape Cod and in Jamaica Plain (where Rae moved in 2000). As a prolific writer, Rae kept a diary for the year 1978, just after her move to Newton and her divorce. Rae described three goals: (One) finding a job that was a good fit for her (Two) getting together with a man she loved and (Three) writing plays to be produced. On the last page of her diary for 1978, she wrote "I think everything will work out for me if I hang in." She did and it did; she accomplished each of those goals and more. Rae will be loved and remembered by those who knew her, including Bruce; her kids, Chris and Jay; her four grandchildren; her cousin, Sam Temkin; and her dear friends.