Thomas Dater

1941 - 2021

Thomas Dater
December 25, 1941 - May 8, 2021
Eagle, Idaho - Thomas Galey Dater was born on Christmas Day, 1941 in New York City to Philip H. Dater and Mary Elizabeth Galey Dater. He passed away at the age of 79, peacefully at home on the morning of May 8th surrounded by loved ones. Known as "Big T" to his eight grandkids, Tom, both fun loving and level-headed by nature, has left a legacy of honesty, hard-work, integrity, humor, and deep family values.
He valued education and constant improvement in one's life. He attended Hotchkiss Boarding School (class of 1960), the University of Colorado, Boulder (joining Phi Gamma Delta and proudly serving as Chapter President), and finally Wichita State University earning his Masters in Business Administration in 1967.
After graduation, he enlisted in the Navy, completing Officer Candidate School in 1967 and later was selected to attend the prestigious US Navy's Fighter Weapons School, otherwise known as "Top Gun". Tom served his country with pride and remained fiercely patriotic to the end of his life. He regarded other members of the armed forces with great respect. He had many experiences to be shared from his time in the Navy; challenges faced during survival training, flying F-4's off an aircraft carrier, once having to eject just hundreds of feet off the flight deck during a failed takeoff, or stopping just moments before missiles were incorrectly targeting a cruise ship full of civilians. It became clear at the end of his life that these experiences were among his most formative.
Tom gained a love for Idaho as a young teen spending many summers "product testing" for his family's business, the Coleman Company. During these trips, Tom experienced bird hunting, trap and skeet shooting, whitewater rafting and canoeing, but really found his life's passion in fly fishing. During summers while in college, he ran a mobile operation repairing lanterns and camp stoves for Coleman consumers around the country. He found that he had a gift for both sales and customer service, attributes that benefited his later career in the life insurance business.
Tom married his first wife, Cathy Colman, of Wichita, Kansas, in 1969, and in 1971 they welcomed their daughter, Hillary. After retiring from the service, Tom moved his young family to Idaho. During Hillary's childhood in Boise, Tom was a constant, reassuring presence at all of her activities. He was a member of the PTA at her elementary school, a coach for her soccer teams, a mentor to her and her friends, a carpool dad cracking jokes, and a proud father clapping for her ballet performances. Many fond memories are shared between Tom and Hillary through a variety of trips involving time spent in the great outdoors. Tom and Hillary shared a deep and special unwavering bond, becoming even closer as Tom's time came to the end.
Tom developed into a premier fly fisherman, not only fishing for trout around the western U.S., but also fly fishing around the world for his favorite catch, the elusive bone fish. Tom almost always had a fish on his line and when passing fishermen would inquire what he was using, he'd always reply with the same quip, "22 cinnamon ant" - which any good fisherman knew was a joke. It was while relaxing in the outdoors, that Tom seemed most at home and his well-known sense of humor would often reveal itself.
In 1971, Tom began what would become a rewarding and successful 50-year career with New York Life. He earned the title of "Lifetime Council Agent" as national recognition for his hard work and frequent performance in the top 250 agents in the company. But, more importantly for Tom, he helped hundreds of clients gain the peace of mind knowing their families would be well taken care of through financial planning.
On December 13, 2003, Tom married the love of his life, Victoria (Viki) H. Thornton. They enjoyed 19 beautiful years together cherishing their home, family, enjoyment of art and world travel. The two were inseparable, sharing every moment with love, respect, and admiration for one another - a true modern day love story. They discovered many common interests in sports participation, art appreciation, and philanthropy. But their most important priority was always family.
Tom believed in honesty, integrity and serving as a mentor to younger generations. He was a mentor to not only his eight grandchildren, but to all of his nieces and nephews, providing them with wise, honest and unfiltered advice. As the grandchildren entered their teens, Tom and Viki took each of them on a special trip to share with them their love of travel while encouraging each of the grandkids' personal interests. These formative trips across the globe are some of the grandchildren's most cherished memories.
While Tom had a serious side with a strong and sure command of numbers, complex insurance products and financial management, he also had a great sense of humor, often breaking the ice with clients, friends and family. While telling a joke, the twinkle in his eye was reminiscent of a young child eager to get to the punch line.
An avid soccer player since high school, Tom continued to play on teams throughout his adult life. After a national New York Life insurance commercial featured Tom and his interest and support of local soccer, he quickly became known as the "Worst fullback in Boise." In addition to playing, Tom shared his love of the sport through service as a coach and referee in the Boise youth leagues. His guiding principles of integrity and fairness were carried through in his duties as referee, even issuing a yellow card to his own grandson during one game.
Beyond his support and appreciation of the outdoors and sports in Idaho, Tom was a passionate patron of the arts in the Boise area. He served as a member of the board for the Boise Art Museum and on their Collector's Forum. In addition to his involvement with Idaho Contemporary Theater and the development of the Idaho Botanical Gardens, he was especially dedicated to the Idaho Shakespeare Festival and their committee to raise funds for their largest projects.
In the last five years of his life, he was diagnosed with Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis and dealt with it in the manner he did with most challenges, head on with a positive outlook. Tom remained active and involved with his family and friends throughout his illness, never complaining and always remaining as self sufficient as possible. In his last weeks and days, he shared wisdom, humor, and spirituality with his family, knowing that he had a life well lived. Among his final words were: there is ...only love.
Tom is survived by his wife Viki; his daughter Hillary (Andy) Betz; step-sons Paul (Sondra) Thornton; Creston (Renee) Thornton; and eight grandchildren Logan and Madison Roth; Cole, Jaxson and Taya Thornton; Chase, Dylan and Hayden Thornton; his brothers Philip Dater, Jr. and Sheldon Coleman, Jr.; his sister Emilie Rowe; along with many nieces and nephews.
Please join us for Tom's Celebration of Life to be held on Friday, June 25th at 11:00am at the Idaho Shakespeare Festival. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made in Tom's name to the Idaho Shakespeare Festival.