David Philip Messing

David "Dave" Messing, 56 years old, of San Ramon, CA, died peacefully surrounded by his loved ones on Sunday, November 12, 2023, following a sudden illness. He is survived by his beloved wife and best friend of 38 years, Pamela Messing, his two sons, Jack and Joshua Messing, his mother, Rhoda Messing (Mark), his brother, Jordan Messing (Rachael), his stepmother Geraldine Messing, and is predeceased by his father Donald Messing. In addition, Dave will be mourned by the extended family of mothers, sisters, brothers, nieces and nephews of which he became an integral part upon marrying Pam.

Friendship, community, commitment, and humility, along with a wry sense of humor, quick wit and take-charge attitude were the essence of Dave. An only child until he was blessed at 18 with the birth of his brother Jordan, Dave always fostered and cherished the "families" he found through school, marriage, professional endeavors, and the Jewish community. From his high school days playing football in Somers, NY, to his undergraduate years in the Theta Chi fraternity or Cameron Indoor Stadium at Duke University, Dave reveled in the camaraderie and spirit that came with being part of a team. His dedication to his alma mater didn't end when he received his BA in Economics in 1989; Dave served the school as an alumni representative and remained a lifelong fan of the Duke Blue Devils.

While Dave told stories of his antics at Duke, the tale that he loved to share most often was about his friendship and pursuit of his soul mate, Pam. Unbeknownst to her, Dave had set his sights on Pam in their freshman year, confident that she was the girl he would eventually marry. Ever determined, he would stop at nothing to win her love and they ultimately wed on January 21, 1995.

In a quest to add to his professional credentials, Dave earned an MBA in Marketing from Columbia University Business School in 1993 and began his career in corporate finance before pivoting to the real estate investment industry where he amassed exceptional expertise in lending, development, equity, and property management over the next 30 years. During his career, Dave ran the special asset and commercial real estate groups for Mechanics Bank and managed the west coast commercial lending offices for both HSH Nordbank and Credit Agricole. Prior to that, he was Director of Acquisitions and Asset Management for Tishman Speyer, and started two other real estate consulting and investment companies.

In June 2014, Dave became a founding partner of Graham Street Realty and took on the role of President of Paramount Property Company in May, 2023. During his tenure with Graham Street and Paramount, Dave set the bar for exceptional leadership, vision, and creative innovation. With his wit, intelligence, integrity, and astounding dedication, he substantially impacted the growth and success of both businesses and he continued to foster his vast network, not only of business connections but also of close friendships, that fueled his drive and commitment.

Dave has always had a strong connection to Judaism and to his Jewish home, Beth Chaim Congregation in Danville, CA. He devoted countless hours of his energy, knowledge and guidance serving on Beth Chaim's Board of Directors. And, as was always his nature, he chose yet another family of like-minded friends with whom he and Pam not only celebrated milestones but also shared the joys and challenges of everyday life.

Nothing brought Dave more joy than being with the family that he and Pam built together. He was a loving partner to Pam and a devoted father to Jack and Josh, leaving no detail to question in his determination to ensure their safe and prosperous passage through life. He was ever-devoted to the boys' development and the pursuit of their dreams. To his mom, Rhoda, he was always the most faithful of sons, ensuring she was well cared for and happy. To Jordan, he was the consummate big brother; while they looked nothing alike, they shared passions for food and travel and could always make each other laugh. His dad, Don, was Dave's sounding board; they conversed for hours on topics spanning work, sports and politics. And to his stepmom, Gerry, Dave was a kindred spirit in their love of the outdoors and exploring new places.

In addition to Duke basketball, Dave ardently followed the Golden State Warriors, rarely missing any of either team's games. An avid skier since childhood, he and Pam traveled to many resorts to pursue this passion. As a travel and adventure enthusiast and a meticulous researcher and planner, Dave loved to arrange vacations for his loved ones. And no one in his circles would think of planning a trip or making a major purchase before first consulting Dave.

Dave will be dearly missed by all who had the privilege to know him and he will be remembered as a person who valued his families above all else.

In lieu of flowers, donations in Dave's memory may be made to Beth Chaim Congregation, Danville, CA