Doreen Mary Hszieh

Doreen Mary Hszieh
Grit; the Oxford English dictionary defines it as having "[c]ourage and resolve; strength of character." Noted psychologist Angela Duckworth described it as "…working on something you care about so much you're willing to stay loyal to it." My mom had grit and it came from her upbringing in post-war Penang, Malaysia where she grew up in a large household with her mother, grandparents, uncles, aunties, and cousins. The Boudville clan lived in the hills of Ayer Itam, Penang, Malaysia when it was a rural part of the island-well before it became the tourist destination it is now. The stories my mom would tell of her childhood were analogous to American tales of past generations when grandma and grandpa would trudge in the snow to go to school. In those days life was simple and so were the basic amenities. Outhouses were where one did some quiet thinking, and also where one would meet the occasional snake during a late night trip to the bathroom. Grinding stones were used to make the various fragrant pastes for the many dishes my great-grandmother would make for the large household. My mom would be there helping out with all the cooking and household chores including rabbit rearing. At the Boudville house rabbits were raised, not as pets but as a food source. This is where my mom learned to be self-sufficient and the "stick-to-itiveness" that serves as the basis of grit.
My mom attended the Convent Light Street School, graduated and then went on to train as a teacher. While teaching in Penang she met my father at a Penang Tourist Guide training event-a social organization that both my parents had joined. My dad had fallen for her angelic, sweet voice and, well, things evolved from there. Both were married on 22 February 1969. During their marriage my mom would be posted to several schools in the country, most notability finding herself teaching in a school in Kulim in the neighboring state of Kedah on the mainland. This posting meant that she would have to commute from Penang to Kulim each day on a busy winding, rural two lane road. The daily commute also included a trip on a ferry to get from Penang island to the mainland. Grit was on full display there.
In 1978, my mom and dad emigrated to the U.S.-not the easiest task in the world as it meant leaving all that was familiar to begin life in another, less-familiar world. Let us not forget that the new life included two youngsters barely out of kindergarten and only a few thousands in the bank. With the generous help of family and friends my mom and dad began life in the U.S. They started out as restaurant owners-a hard scrabble life as both knew little of the business and my mom had to learn to cook in a big way. However, restaurant life was not to be and my mom and dad both made the decision to go back to school and restart their careers. My mom chose nursing and earned her nursing degree from San Bernardino Valley College-a rigorous program that also included dissecting a cat and memorizing it innards as the first step to understanding the human anatomy. All this was done in her forties while raising my sister and me; and learning new subjects that were outside of her studies at the Convent Light Street School and the teacher's college. Yet, she made it and upon graduation went to work at St. Bernardine Medical Center as surgical room nurse. My mom had true grit to restart her life in the U.S. and build a long and successful career as a surgical nurse.
Her passion and persistence was also on full display at home where she and my dad raised my sister and me-helping us through school; through college; and with our families and careers. Her passions at home not only included all of us and our dogs, but also her garden where her artistic talents were used to transform a simple plot of earth into a showcase of nature. Each spring her meticulously planned and curated garden exploded in a dazzling display of floral blooms-from the pure white Iceberg roses providing a welcoming boarder, to the towering sprays of the delicate pink blooms of the Eden climbing rose framing the front entryway. The beauty of the garden also found its way into the house as vases of roses and flowers would adorn the kitchen and dining room tables-all arranged by my mom who learned the art of Western and Japanese flower arrangement in her youth. She was also a talented artist who sketched portraits of her friends.
In short, my mom's greatest passion throughout her life was her family. This unique combination of passion and persistence-grit-my mom had from her days growing up in Penang and making a new life in the United States culminated in building this wonderful life for all of us here today.