Lawrence "Larry" Houghteling

Lawrence "Larry" Houghteling obituary, Baltimore, MD

Lawrence "Larry" Houghteling

Lawrence Houghteling Obituary

Published by Legacy Remembers on Aug. 6, 2024.
Lawrence Kelly Houghteling (born James Lawrence Houghteling) of Ruxton, MD, aged 80 and 1 month, died at Greater Baltimore Medical Center the morning of August 3, surrounded by loving family. He was predeceased by his father, James Houghteling, his mother, Fiora Mariotti Houghteling, and his brother, Peter Houghteling. He is survived by his sons, Samuel Houghteling, of Fort Collins, CO, and Jack Houghteling, of New York, NY, his partner, Nikia Leopold, of Ruxton, MD, his daughters-in-law, Kelly Houghteling of Fort Collins, CO, and Abigayle Dolmseth of New York, NY, a brother, Robert Houghteling, of Oakland, CA, a sister, Nan Wicker, of Myrtle Beach, SC, the mother of his sons, Regina Kelly Houghteling, of Hastings-on-Hudson, NY, two beloved granddaughters, Sophie and Willa, as well as friends and family stretching from Dartmouth, MA to Taos, NM and far beyond.

Born at Walter Reed in Washington, DC, Larry lived in a number of places throughout his childhood: a time-and-again homebase on Kalorama Road, where resided his grandmother, Laura Delano Houghteling, a first cousin of President Franklin Delano Roosevelt, and his grandfather, James Lawrence Houghteling, who served in a number of roles in the Roosevelt administration; on Buzzards Bay, MA, where his family had a home and ancestral roots; in Garches, France, where his father Jim worked for the United States government in the years following World War II; in Cambridge and Newton, MA; in the Squirrel Hill neighborhood of Pittsburgh, PA; in Bucks County, PA, where he attended high school; and, lastly, in New Haven, CT, where he began his undergraduate studies at Yale University, returning two decades later to finish his degree with his young son and wife.

It was in New Haven, in the early sixties, where he'd create, further and make decisions about the key components that would come to define his life (conflicting and, yet, reconciliatory, digesting and combining them as he did into a final, sundry matrimony): a contagious curiosity and intellectuality; candor; independence; a propensity - which can only be described as deeply American - for change and movement; a desire for the many textures and tenors of friendship; an ardor for baseball, driving, visual art, song and books (the latter for which he'd extend car rides four and six hours at a time, and in the process render the business model of every used bookstore between New York and Boston viable); a search for communal meaning, national and local; a healthy, is-this-or-is-this-not-over-the-line pugnacity; a love of (and pride for) family; and, perhaps most finally, a care and compassion - complete and three-dimensional - for all that the north, south, east and west of his brain could come to see and conjure about the world.

Later in life he'd find the candor, friendship and independence he'd so been searching for in San Francisco and Taos, NM and as a reporter, disc jockey, executive director of an art institute, commune resident, carpenter, editor and writer; he'd create and rediscover family after moving back to the east coast - to Hastings-on-Hudson with Regina, Sam and Jack and in Massachusetts with his family; he'd find quarrel - the right kind, he hoped and thought - as the virtual world burgeoned and post-colonial wars and authoritarian know-nothingness lent way to a wide and blunt expression of thought and feeling (his email archive, as Harrison Ford would say, belongs in a museum); he'd find communal meaning as a teacher of all subjects but science at Children's Village in Dobbs Ferry, NY and in East Harlem; and he'd find much of that deep sense of compassion (of everything) late in life as a caretaker - and as a brother, son, partner and friend - first with Peter in the Berkshires, then with Fiora in Newton and, finally, with Niki in Baltimore.

He will always be remembered. He will always be appreciated. But, most acutely, he will always be missed.

Memorial plans will be scheduled for the fall and the beginning of 2025.

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January 27, 2025

Houghton Brown posted to the memorial.

September 30, 2024

Christina (Chris) Forbes posted to the memorial.

August 14, 2024

Liz (Nellie) Cervio posted to the memorial.

Houghton Brown

January 27, 2025

I met Larry back in the fall of 1984 at Boston College Evening School. He and I were both returning to university after our respective breaks from school. I had been a dropout for 3 years and was about 23 years old. Larry had taken a sabbatical from his university studies (Yale) for about 20 years and was 40 or so years of age.

It was a European history class. I was fascinated by this older gentleman wearing overalls (some type of construction worker or painter I supposed) who was making the most erudite and interesting contributions to class discussions. After a few classes, I hazarded approaching him during class break and getting to know something about him.

When his biography came to Taos, New Mexico, I mentioned that I had some cousins who were raised in a commune near Taos in the 1960s and '70s. Larry, of course, knew them and their mother. Later, I mentioned this to my cousins and they recalled Larry most fondly. Thus began my friendship with Larry Houghteling.

The following summer, Larry hired me to help him paint the house (in Somerville, MA) that he and Gina were living in. Can you imagine being a wide-eyed 23-year-old youngster, sitting high atop a two-to-three story scaffolding for a summer, listening to Larry regale you with his hippie stories from the 1960s; his take on world and American historic events from decades past; his political conspiracy theories; all while listening to recordings in the background of "The Larry Houghteling Radio Show"? It was a wonderful summer, and one that broadened our friendship and deepened my appreciation for the mind and intellect that was Larry Houghteling's.

I write this January 27th 2025 from Taos, New Mexico. I took a moment today to call Larry to tell him where I was. When I heard the automated recording declaring his number disconnected, I realized that our dear Larry has ventured into the great beyond.

May he get to visit with all those notable historical, literary, and intellectual figures whom he so much revered. When I pass, I too hope I get to visit with Larry.

My best to Gina, Sam, Jack, and Nikki. Thank you for sharing your Larry with us and keeping his memories alive.

Christina (Chris) Forbes

September 30, 2024

Larry and I were 5 years old, living in Paris where our parents were doing whatever parents do. My first memory is of the two of us sliding down a muddy embankment and Larry getting a big tear in his derriere. We had a lot of hi jinks at that time (locking ourselves in our large bathroom, to compare our unclothed parts). I believe our maid (we had one at the time) peeked through the keyhole and tattled on us. Larry was a lifelong friend. My mother was particularly close with his mother, Fiora. Many years later, my mother remarried a man who turned out to be a college friend of Larry's father, Jim, which strengthened our families' friendship. We visited Newton on summer trips East from California. I will miss my oldest friend and hold Gina and Sam in my heart as well as his brother Peter and sister Nan.

Liz (Nellie) Cervio

August 14, 2024

Spring 1970, Arroyo Seco, NM. Larry & his then-business-partner, Phil drove a bunch of us students from Goddard College on a jaunt through Acoma Pueblo, San Ysidro hot springs and Chaco Canyon. I lucked out and got to ride with Larry. He was a friend for many years after that, and I was again blessed with luck to also call his former wife, Gina, a friend too. Via con Dios, amigo!

Elisabeth Bickart

August 13, 2024

Dear Sam and Jack,
It is with great sorrow that we learned of the passing of our dear friend Larry. Please accept our most sincere condolences.
We received the last email from Larry on July 8, in which he expressed great enthusiasm about the French people's decision to unite in blocking the far-right.
My first memories of Larry are from the early 1950s in Garches, a suburb of Paris.
My parents, Lotte and Alfred Seckel, of German origin and anti-Nazi, met Fiora and Jim at M.C.P. (Mouvement Chrétien pour la Paix) meetings, and they developed a strong friendship.
When our mother was hospitalized for a long period due to serious health problems, Fiora and Jim spontaneously and generously offered to take in my brother Christophe and me in Garches.
Larry was already very tall and strong, and he left a big impression on me. I thought he was much older than I was. In fact, I was the eldest, born in 1943.
From then on, almost every time he came to Paris, he would wave to us and we would spend a few hours together, rediscovering his tremendous zest for life and sunny personality.
I remember that even after decades, he was still searching for the missing albums of The Adventures of Tintin, a must-have comic book from the fifties!
He got along very well with my younger brother Michael, who passed away in 2019 and shared the same "joie de vivre."
Larry will remain deeply engraved in our memories.
Au revoir, Monsieur Larry.
With heartfelt sympathy,

Elisabeth and Pierre Bickart

Cathy Howard

August 12, 2024

My memories of Larry are from long ago. Fiora and my mom (Edith Howard) were first cousins and were very close throughout their long lives. Here is a photo of the Houghtelings and the Howards in our backyard in summer 1955.
Good times!

Cluster of 50 Memorial Trees

Lynn Surum

Planted Trees

Eric Corson

August 10, 2024

I am so sorry to learn about Lawrence´s passing. I fondly remember meeting Larry, several times, at Fiora´s house in Newton. He was so friendly, as we discussed the greatness of his mother, Fiora. Please let me know about plans for his memorial.

Group of 10 Memorial Trees

The Lundeen-Goldschlag Family

Planted Trees

Annie degen

August 8, 2024

Annie degen
larry loved his family soooooooooooo much. he talked about them to me a lot. especially sam!!!!

Lindsey Tyler

August 8, 2024

Larry was a cherished neighbor and friend to our family. His kindness, generosity, humor, and warmth touched our lives over the years he lived here in Baltimore. Our children, Margot and Milo, loved him and were always excited to run outside and chat with "Mr. Larry". Larry shared wisdom, a joke, or a smile every chance he got. For their birthday, he would always share copies of his favorite childhood books and we are grateful to have those in our library. We will deeply miss his warm smile and gentle spirit. Rest in peace, Mr. Larry.

- The Tylers (Lindsey, Pat, Margot & Milo)

Jana Tiitus

August 7, 2024

Soon after I moved to Hastings I´d been introduced to Larry and seen him around to say hello - but my first real interaction came on an evening - was it Halloween? - anyway, something to do with costumes, and I went to the Houghteling´s to see what was what. Larry - big bear Larry - was stuffed into a tight little jacket with a tiny little top hat balanced on his head - looking sublimely ridiculous - and so I experienced first hand one of his great talents: to make you laugh. We also just happened to connect on the subject which was to be the core of our relationship - reading. Larry was a voracious reader. He gobbled books; old books, new books, beloved books he´d just re-read, unheard of books by unknown authors discovered in one of the used bookstores he frequented - always finding new authors, or books by known authors that had been overlooked, and always having something to say about them which gave you insight, got you thinking. Book talking with Larry was bliss. And being in the Houghteling house full of Houghtelings - Sam, Jack, Regina - talking about books, politics, whatever- was bliss. I am so grateful for those times. So grateful for having had the chance to have known and been friends with one of the true originals of the world. Larry, may you be reading forever.

Regina Kelly

August 7, 2024

Regina Kelly

August 7, 2024

Regina Kelly

August 7, 2024

Regina Kelly

August 7, 2024

I met Larry Houghteling while a waitress at Dori's Restaurant in January of 1983. We stayed together for a few weeks after a first date the following night. For different reasons, neither of us believed we were the marrying type, but we both really enjoyed being with children. We married in the summer of 1985. Larry refused to wear a tux, I didn't care & he showed up at Aunt Louise's (the venue) in a blinding-white tux, I had on a white silk regular dress, with enormous shoulder pads. My Galligan cousins made me flowered combs for my hair.
Sam was born in January of 1986 and we moved every year until arriving in Hastings in August of 1993, Sam to start 2nd grade and Jack was not yet two years old.
In September of 1995, with big help from Fiora, we bought a 2 family house on Marble Terrace in Hastings on Hudson and every single anniversary after, I believe six or seven years, Larry would mark it as the longest he ever lived anywhere. He was friends with every blade of grass in the big south facing garden on Marble Terrace and learned the art of the barbecue. He began a relationship with Nikia Clark, a woman he had loved since high school, in 2011. They were together until his death.
Larry's legal name was Lawrence Kelly Houghteling, he took my last name as his middle name and we agreed he would name the boys and I would name the girls. Neither of our fathers, who were very different men, thought this name jumbling thing was good.
I include the 3rd photo because the caption was so completely Larry. It was taken at a birthday party. He named it, "It takes a village to replace General Patton."

Group of 10 Memorial Trees

Marcia M Brewster

Planted Trees

Marcia Mawson Brewster

August 6, 2024

I first met Larry at Grace Episcopal church, where he, Gina and the boys attended services for several years. He became my son Matthew Mawson's mentor while they were doing confirmation classes at the church. Larry was the perfect mentor for Matt - compassionate, funny, intelligent and quirky. I must congratulate the writer of the obituary (is that you, Sam?) for evoking so many memories of a great person. The photos also bring with them many memories. We will miss this gentle soul; he was a gift to the community.

Single Memorial Tree

Meg Blanchet

Planted Trees

Meg Blanchet

August 6, 2024

Meg Blanchet

August 6, 2024

Meg Blanchet

August 6, 2024

My first memory of Larry was at Nonquitt where he and my mother, Nancy Hoag Blanchet, had struck up a fast friendship. At the time, I was 15 and that summer we enjoyed so many laughs, stories and adventures.
Later, Larry and I would meet again, fall in love and live together in Washington DC. When it became clear that our lives needed to take different directions, we kept in touch with each other at least twice a year on our birthdays, just as my uncle Davie and his mother Fiona had done throughout their lives.
I'm so glad that we had the opportunity to see him in 2019 when he came to visit us in Eugene, OR. I am so sorry to hear of his passing, but am grateful to hear that his stint with cancer was a short one. I have always loved Larry and will miss him so. Thank you so much for reaching out and letting me know of his passing!
(P.S.When I get back to Oregon, I will see what early pictures I can find)

Kate Herman

August 6, 2024

Here's Larry at our last Solstice celebration in 2008... He was a Star! Much love & hugs to you all...

Single Memorial Tree

Pam Houghteling

Planted Trees

Ruth Middleman

August 5, 2024

Ruth Middleman

August 5, 2024

Ruth Middleman

August 5, 2024

from Ruthie Middleman, Larry´s cousin:

I hadn´t seen Larry since we were 16, until he moved to Baltimore in recent years to be with Nikki. He was the same, ebullient and engagé cousin that I remembered.
He and my husband Raoul, who was a painter, and had a similar gusto, bonded immediately.
Larry was an artist himself and attended all the events at our small gallery. Everyone loved him. He leaves a large Larry sized hole that nothing could possibly fill-

Richard Brown

August 5, 2024

Wrestling season freshman year at George School. I remember him wrestling heavy against one of my Newtown Friends School classmates. I didn't interact with Larry all that often at GS but we began exchanging emails in recent years and, as you have said, he was always interesting, engaged and engaging. I have long talked of going down to Baltimore (we live in Philly though we spend the summer in Idaho where we are at present) to visit with him. Pleasure delayed is pleasure denied unfortunately. Please let me know of any funeral plans. I seem to be keeper of history for GS '61 so I can pass that info on to classmates at the right time. I sympathize with you at this time of loss.

Peter Moore

August 5, 2024

Hey Sam, and family. As I write this, I've been waiting for Larry to email me a) with a screed about one of the many things he cared deeply about, or b) to clue me in as to when our next breakfast/lunch out in Fort Collins would be, when he took time out from being with his adored family here. I guess the screed and email will be delayed, until he gets the wifi password in Opinionated Heaven. I met Larry through our covid-era book group here in FoCo, and from the start I could discern that he read books avidly, filtered through his amazing life of experience and erudition. He was a brilliant chatterbox, he roared with laughter, and he told stories that made my hair curl and my belly ache. I'll so miss all of that. Reading through his life story, I now know where all that came from: the man had a passion for life, and rich experience came from that. He made my life richer simply by joining me for burgers at Lucky Joe's. He brought his big fascinating world with him everywhere he went, including (presumably) into the Great Beyond, wherever that happens to be. I'm so glad I had the chance to know him in this world. He inhabited it grandly, and that's how I'll remember him: Grandly.

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January 27, 2025

Houghton Brown posted to the memorial.

September 30, 2024

Christina (Chris) Forbes posted to the memorial.

August 14, 2024

Liz (Nellie) Cervio posted to the memorial.